Wow, I haven't updated much this summer...and with sophomore year coming, I'll probably have even less time for fanfiction. Oh well.

Anyways, this is just a silly oneshot that should not be taken seriously. It may become the last thing I post this summer, I don't know.

Please review it, I wanna see how I'm doing.

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Revelations and Robot Dogs

She'd been washing the dishes when she felt someone tugging on her pant leg.

Sighing internally, she turned to face the culprit. "What do you need, Calvin?"

The six-year-old boy looked up at her. "I just wanted to let you know that we're experiencing a minor invasion out back."

She decided to humor him. "Invasion, you say?"

"Yeah, there's a robot alien dog singing about our impending doom. Just thought I'd let you know."

"Alright." With that, she went back to her dishes. She thought she heard Calvin mutter something about "non-believers", but she ignored it.

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A little while later, she was almost done with the dishes when she felt the tugging again. "Calvin, what do you need now?" she sighed.

"Mom, I'm in here," Calvin responded from the living room.

It took a second for that to register with Mom. Slowly, she turned to whoever was tugging at her pant leg-and saw a small green dog with a zipper on it's front giving her a large-eyed stare. "Hello, parental unit!" it said cheerfully.

"AUGH!" she shrieked, dropping a plate. "CALVIN!"

Calvin ran into the kitchen. "What?"

"WH-WHAT IS THIS?!"

"I'm Gir!" the...thing...said.

Calvin sighed. "It's a malfunctioning Irken SIR unit poorly disguised as some breed of dog," he said way too calmly. "I told you about him earlier."

"WHY IS IT IN OUR HOUSE?!"

"Remember when I told you that I sold the Earth for a class project?" Calvin asked. "Well, it apparently didn't sit well with some incompetent alien conqueror, and he sent this thing to eliminate me. Fortunately, as I said earlier, this SIR unit is malfunctioning, so he's actually a pretty decent guy to be around."

"It's a love rollercoaster!" Gir squealed.

Mom was at a loss for words. All of her son's tales of aliens were true?

The doorbell rang.

"Well, speak of the devil," Calvin noted, pulling out a water pistol. "Seems that the SIR's master has come to finish the job. Hang on." Then, in a deeper, hammier voice, "SPACEMAN SPIFF, CONQUEROR OF THE COSMOS, IS ABOUT TO DO BATTLE WITH A LITTLE GREEN MAN!"

Mom saw Calvin run to the front door and heard it open. While she couldn't see the battle that followed, she could hear the conversation.

"EARTH BOY SCUM! THE EARTH IS MINE TO CONQUER!"

"SPACEMAN SPIFF WILL PROTECT THIS PLANET AT ALL COSTS!"

"YOU ARE NO SPACEMAN! YOU ARE JUST SOME STOOOOPID EARTH BOY WHO IS A COMPLETE-AAAUGH, THE BURNINESS!"

"SPACEMAN SPIFF HAS LOADED HIS GUN WITH THE FINEST PEPPER SPRAY! SURRENDER!"

"NEVEEEEEEEER!"

What followed was a series of crashes that Mom assumed would take forever to clean up. She pinched the bridge of her nose and did her best to process what was happening.

Then an anthropomorphic tiger walked in. Mom stared at it.

"Hobbes?" she asked, not sure what she was seeing.

The tiger just rolled his eyes. "Aliens are invading, and you're just surprised that I'm standing on my hind legs."

"...Touche."

"This fanfic is gonna get zero reviews!" Gir squealed.