AN: I know this isn't a Whispering update, but I hope you enjoy it nevertheless. It's a cute little one-shot I hadn't ever planned on writing until a challenge gave me inspiration for this one.
R & R lovelies. Let me know whatcha think!
Constant Vigilance!
magick
Chapter One
She is unattainable. It's not like I'm a complete and utter loser and she's the gorgeous, vivacious girl every bloke is after. Not at all. That's too Muggle-film-esque for me. I don't think I could ever fall for someone so inherently perfect.
She's the kind of girl that is everyone's friend. She's nice and normal. And yet she is still unattainable.
I've known her since I was three. Our parents traveled the world, promoting peace or being well-known Quidditch players. Our parents are famous; we have that in common. And yet, she doesn't see me in any other way than the-boy-who-has-been-my-friend-forever. Fifteen years. Fifteen years and entirely unattainable.
"Huuuuuh," I sigh.
"Is something wrong?"
I look to my left. There she is. She looks genuinely worried. Of course she is; she worries about everyone all the same. Even if she didn't know someone, she could easily talk to them for hours about anything if it meant she could make them happy again.
"No. Not really."
She smiles. "Whenever someone says that, something is most definitely wrong. You can tell me. I want to help."
She is self-less. I can't think of a time when she was the one that needed to vent or burden someone with her problems. I don't think she has problems.
"You don't want to know."
She laughs. "Of course I do! I want to help you; you're my best friend."
Oh the pain! The stab at hearing those four words in nearly unbearable. It's the one thing a bloke never wants to hear.
I rub my face, trying to think of a way to tell her without telling her.
Oh Merlin.
"There's this girl…"
Her eyes widen in surprise. I guess she didn't expect that.
She licks her lips as though she's formulating how to respond. She always does that when she's about to give advice. It's cute. And distracting.
"What about this girl?"
For some reason, her voice is a bit breathy, like she can't seem to catch her breath fully. She's strong; her voice shouldn't sound weak and breathy.
"Well, she's unattainable."
Her eyes widen even more than I think is possible.
"Really? I can hardly believe that a girl can be unattainable."
How naïve she is. She doesn't even know how unattainable a girl can be.
"Believe me. She is."
"Why?" she asks.
"Well," I begin, not really knowing how to approach something that can hardly be explained through words. "She's the nicest person you will ever meet. The most personable too; she can talk to anyone easily as if they were her best friend. She's courteous. She listens. She's smart, maybe not exactly book smart, but she understands people which I find more amazing than anything. She's beautiful too, in her own way, far surpassing any other girl who primps and preens for hours. She looks beautiful without any effort. And she doesn't see me in any way other than as a friend."
I finally look at her straight in the eyes and it almost looks like she's about to cry. But she doesn't cry, ever.
She's biting her lip and looks so insecure and worried.
When she finally speaks, her voice is wavers.
"Well, it's best if you tell her. She may surprise you."
Swiftly, she stands up and sweeps out of the room before I can even call her back.
"But that girl is you, Lily."
I sigh again. If I was man-enough, I'd go after her. If I couldn't find her, I'd steal the map from Al. If I found her, I'd profess my love for her by taking her into my arms and kissing her. If, if, if. Will there ever be a when?
She always tells me to follow my heart and do what I think is right, but I'm not her. I'm not brave and I don't follow my heart. How I ended up in Gryffindor is beyond me. I don't talk to random people to make their day a little brighter. I ignore those people who are depressed. I'm not kind to everyone. I make fun of people who get stuck in the trick step. I hold grudges. I once didn't talk to Al for a whole month because he stole my broomstick as a "joke" – it was most definitely on purpose.
But today – maybe today I can change that. I'll do it for Lily.
I get up off my arse and follow her.
Soon enough, I'm running through the corridors like a mad man and people are staring me. I believe they think I am mad. But seriously, I'm not. I'm just a poor fuck in love.
Occasionally, I see a few friends and ask them if they've seen Lily. Unfortunately, no one has seen her.
I look absolutely everywhere in the castle, but I can't find her. I do find Al though and ask him for the map.
"What for, mate?"
"I need to find your sister. She ran off somewhere."
"Finally scare her off, eh? Took six years, but now you've finally done it. I warned her you'd be difficult and probably break her heart, but she was certain you'd do no such thing. Bloody hell, I was right."
"What?" Now, normally, I would tell the wanker to piss off but something he said caught my attention.
"Break her heart? What are you going on about?"
"Mate, she's fucking in love with you! She has been since she first met you. Merlin, you're clueless. Everyone with eyes can see it. You better let her down gently. She may seem to have an impenetrable exterior, but that's just a façade. She's a big softie. And you telling her that you don't love her is going to shatter her."
I look at Al hard and long and finally realise why I never seemed to be able to make friends with him: he's a bloody wanker. He didn't just act like it; he was one. He didn't seem to care one knut for his only sister.
"Al, you know what, fuck off."
I leave and I know that he was never going to give me the map anyway.
I walk down the corridor and I know that Al is too stunned to even follow me.
I take a left turn and instantly, where Lily must be pops into my head. Why didn't I think of it before?
I change my pace to a run, screaming through the corridors for people to move out of the way. A few unfortunates are knocked over in the process.
Sprinting through the Great Hall, people are beginning to stare at me strangely and I could care less. The heavy Great Hall doors leading to the outside world part for me and I make my way to the Whomping Willow.
There's no doubt about it; I'm winded. I am not an athlete. I couldn't play Quidditch to save my life, much to my dad's dismay. But still I run as quickly as I can to Lily.
I can just barely see her red hair against the ashy bark of the willow. I have to get there soon.
Somehow, I get a burst of adrenaline and I there faster than I expected.
There is sniffling and I know that it's Lily.
She's sitting on the knot at the base of the Willow, forcing it to be still. At any moment, she can move and the tree will thrash about, effectively hurting me.
She hasn't noticed me yet until I crunch a fallen branch underfoot.
She looks up and I don't think I've ever seen her so upset.
"What are you doing here?" she manages to ask me.
"I'm here to see how you are."
"You should be telling that girl how beautiful and wonderful and perfect she is, not standing in front of me, breathing so heavily as though you've ran the whole way here."
"You're far more important. And I did run all the way here."
Hastily, Lily dried her eyes.
"You are absolutely ridiculous! You've only a few more months here and then you're gone. No more Hogwarts. This may be the last chance to see her and see if she could feel the same way about you!"
"Merlin I hope not."
A strange look passes over her face. "Excuse me?"
"I said, 'Merlin I hope not.'"
"But to what?"
"I hope it won't be the last time I see her."
Lily looks at me through narrowed eyes. She's trying to look intimidating, but it's not working.
"Come on. Let's take a walk."
I extend my hand for her to take. Taking my hand, she gets up slowly, being sure to keep a foot on the knot so the Whomping Willow doesn't unfreeze.
She takes her wand out and murmurs a spell to keep the knot pressed down, giving us enough time to move far enough away from potential danger.
I'm still holding her hand as we walk away from the willow. I really like how her hand fits in mine.
She's quiet as we walk hand-in-hand toward the Black Lake. I don't really know what to say myself.
Finally, we reach the water's edge and she realises her hand is in mine. Discreetly, she slips her hand out and I suddenly feel naked without it.
"So, um, why did you run away when I told you about this girl I like?"
She sighs nearly inaudibly.
"I had to be somewhere."
"You had a date with the Whomping Willow?"
I get a small chuckle out of that.
"No. I had a date with my thoughts."
I nod, despite the fact she isn't looking at me, but out on the lake.
"What if you had a date with the Whomping Willow and me?"
There's a strange silence between us.
After what feels like eons, she speaks.
"What?"
I feel her eyes on me and I feel like I can hardly breathe.
Al was lying. Lily isn't in love with me. If she were, she'd have said something by now, especially after that blatant comment of mine. Al was just being an arsehole like usual.
"Never mind," I say sheepishly.
"Never mind? You pretty much just asked me out and then you say never mind? What is wrong with you?"
Lily sounds angry, which I suppose is pretty understandable.
"I'm sorry. I don't really mean that. I mean, I don't really mean never mind…You see Lils –"
So I've gotten this far. I've manned-up. I've chased after her. We're alone. And now…I'm going to choke? No. No! Today is the day that I am going to kiss. Today is the day I'm going to tell her that she is that girl, the unattainable one. Today is the day that I will tell her I love her.
I look down and see her looking up at me expectantly, waiting for whatever it is I have to say.
Then I notice a stray hair. Gently, I push it behind her ear and I hear her breath hitch ever so slightly. My hand lingers, finally resting on her cheek.
I look to her lips and see they have parted.
I lean in and gently kiss her. She doesn't even breathe; it's as if she's afraid to.
I can tell she's kissing me back and I almost don't want to pull away, but I have to tell her.
There is barely a centimetre between our lips and her stunned eyes meet mine.
"Lily, you have to know now that the unattainable girl I was talking about is you. You are her."
"But why didn't –" she begins but I cut her off.
"My Gryffindor courage was nowhere to be found. I decided today, less than half an hour ago, that I was going to tell you. I couldn't hold it in any longer. It was going to kill me."
Abruptly, she kisses me so fiercely I'm almost knocked off balance.
Her arms wrap themselves around my neck and her hands tangle themselves in my hair. My hands find themselves holding tightly to her hips, pulling her closer.
I easily lose myself in this kiss and not before long, we're busy snogging by the Black Lake.
We break apart as the sun begins to set.
She looks up at me, smiling, her hair a radiant reddish-gold in the disappearing sunlight. Her arms are wrapped around my waist and I love the feel of her arms around me.
"Just so you know, I was pretty much devastated when you said there was a girl you liked. I've loved you for nearly forever and I never wanted to jeopardise our friendship. And now you tell me you feel the same; it's unbelievable."
"You better believe it, Lils because I love you."
She stands on her tiptoes and kisses me.
"Well, now you see I'm perfectly attainable."
Oh, how right she was. Perfectly attainable.