I wrote this with McMuffin, who posted it under Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You. This is my first fanfic, so please be nice!

Disclaimer: Obviously I don't own anything to do with Twilight or I wouldn't spend my time writing about it on Fanfiction.

BLACK WATER by MrsCullenSeventeen4eva

As I drifted, I dreamed. Where I floated, under the dark water, I heard the happiest sound my mind could conjure up- as beautiful, as uplifting, as it was ghastly. It was another snarl, a deeper, wilder roar that rang with fury.

I was brought back, almost to the surface, by a sharp pain slashing my upraised hand, but I couldn't find my way back far enough to open my eyes. And then I knew I was dead. Because, through the heavy water, I heard the sound of an angel calling my name, calling me to the only heaven I wanted.

"Oh no, Bella, no!" the angel's voice cried in horror. Behind that longed-for sound was another noise- an awful tumult that my mind shied away from. A vicious bass growling, a shocking snapping sound, and a high keening, suddenly breaking off… I tried to concentrate on the angel's voice instead.

"Bella, please! Bella listen to me, please, please, Bella please!" he begged.

Yes, I wanted to say. Anything. But I couldn't find my lips.

"Carlisle!" The angel called, agony in his perfect voice. "Bella, Bella, no, oh please, no, no!" And the angel was sobbing tearless, broken sobs. The angel shouldn't weep, it was wrong. I tried to find him, to tell him everything was fine, but the water was so deep, it was pressing on me and I couldn't breathe. There was a point of pressure against my head. It hurt. Then, as that pain broke through I cried out, gasping, breaking through the dark pool.

"Bella!" the angel cried.

"She's lost some blood, but the head wound isn't deep." A calm voice informed me. "Watch out for her leg, it's broken."

A howl of rage strangled the angel's lips. I felt a sharp stab in my side. This couldn't be heaven, could it? There was too much pain for that.

"Some ribs too, I think." The methodical voice continued. But the sharp pains were fading. There was a new pain, a scalding pain in my hand that was overshadowing everything else. Someone was burning me.

"Edward?" I tried to tell him, but the pain was so extreme that I found myself sinking. Sinking down deeper into the black water.

.xXx.

This is all my fault. Why am I so selfish? I've had centuries to detach from the humans, yet I cannot detach from her. I should've known better. Every minute I'm with her she's in danger, this just proves it. Look at her lying there. Broken. How could I do this to her? I knew this would happen someday, and my hideous self would hurt her. I just didn't think it would happen so soon. A muffled sob escaped my lips, sounding like I was choking.

It felt like I was choking, drowning even. Drowning in the black sea. Black for dark. Black for night. Black for pain. Black for everything around me. Black for all the pain around me. Pain I caused to Bella. Pain I caused to myself, how could I let this happen? Another sob escaped my parted lips, yet no salt fell. Another reason for me to stay away, I'm nothing like her; I'm a danger to her.

Carlisle was nearly finished stitching up her head. I wonder what my darling Bella is thinking? Probably what an unsensitive, dangerous fool I am. She'd be right. That is exactly what I am. Exactly. But I knew that she wouldn't ever think that of me, no matter what I did. She was too kind. I don't deserve her. She thinks she deserves me but I think she deserves so much more. She deserves one of her own kind.

"Edward." Carlisle's calm voice broke my thoughts, "We have to move her… I can't fix her here. We need the hospital. Alice will be finished with the evidence soon…"

I nodded numbly, whatever they had to do to save her.

.xXx.

The fire. Burning, heat. Pain. I lay perfectly still, not twitching even a finger. Not a fluttering eyelash. Not a single groan escaped my burning lips. But I had to remain this way. I had to. Because I knew that if I moved even the slightest inch, I wouldn't be able to control the pain. I wouldn't be able to stop a scream from building in my charred throat. I would thrash my limbs in vain, and all this would cause was the pain of Edward.

When I was in pain, he was too. Which was why I had to keep the pain, the searing pain, locked inside of me, and not give the slightest indication of the torture I was enduring. The pain had started in my hand, and then slowly it seeped up my arm to take over my whole body. It was unlike any injury I'd ever had before, my body didn't go into shock, it never numbed. It felt like I was in an oven, slowly roasting from the inside out. I tried not to think about myself being food. It almost made me laugh. Almost.

.xXx.

Three days Bella had been lying there. Three days and not one little movement. The only communication we'd had was when she mumbled my hateful name in the ballet studio. Once. What have I done? What if Bella doesn't wake up? Her heart had been beating faster and faster for the past few hours like it was under stress or something. Why won't she wake up? Why? She looked very pale, sickly. To be expected of course. How could I do this to her? What have I done?

I sighed deeply as I listened to her rapid heartbeat, it was soothing in a way, the hurried drumming almost made me want to tap my feet like it was a 50s tune. Damnit! Why do my thoughts always turn inappropriate? Though if Bella was a tune, she's definitely be one of the sweet melodies from the 50s, so unpredictable yet soft. I cast my eyes over her pale skin; it looked like porcelain, so still and peaceful, her chest barely rising as she breathed, though her brow was creased from pain. At least I knew the IV was helping to numb it.

I delicately place two fingers on her forehead, the only place that seemed untouched. As soon as I felt the ice, the drumming became so rapid the monitors were beeping like crazy… it hurt my sensitive ears. Then the noise stopped so abruptly I thought I was deaf. Then beneath my hand, her eyelids snapped open revealing blood red pupils.

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