AN: This pairing... *snorts* I think I just wanted to write it because Fax and Mylan were both annoying me. So, I thought...why not? This is...pretty scarring. It's rated T for a reason. Skadi Marchking II (the dear Skadehlicious) gets credit for being awesome and for helping me. *nods*
Disclaimer: I don't own Maximum Ride nor the song Always Attract by You Me At Six.
"If it hurts this much, then it must be love. And it's a lottery, I can't wait to draw your name."
-You Me At Six
In the shadows, Fang watches them. They laugh together, sitting on the couch. The boy with strawberry-blond hair whispers something in her ear. She laughs, slapping his arm playfully. Fang flinches. He was once that person the girl would have shared her laughs with.
"Iggy, I highly doubt you can blow up the world with just one bomb," the girl says, smiling. Fang can just make out what they are saying, due to his sensitive hearing and how he has his ear pressed against the window. Not conspicuous at all. Fang is counting on the fact that he can turn invisible if he stays still long enough. All he has to do is make sure to not move.
Easier to say that to do.
Fang's foot is falling asleep—he has been eavesdropping on the couple for an hour. There is a crick in his neck and he longs to be able to rolls his shoulders to work the soreness out of them.
Max has her head on the Iggy's shoulder and she looks comfortable in that environment. She has a tub of ice cream sitting in front of her, but her spoon is abandoned and the ice cream is quickly melting. She doesn't seem to care as she sits on the couch. Fang feels something twist in his chest, almost like jealousy, but darker, more bitter. Just short of hate, but he has no idea who it is directed toward. Max? Iggy?
Himself?
The TV is on, and there is a movie playing. Fang does not recognize the movie, but as soon as he looks, the female lead and the male lead share a kiss. Max erupts into giggles and buries her face in her palm. Fang winces. He wants her.
"What the hell?" a voice behind him asks. Before he has time to react, he is pressed against the wall and is spun around by an unfamiliar hand. It seems like he can overcome this person, but he has been caught off guard, and his attacker has a strong grip on him. He isn't going anywhere soon.
Fang looks at Dylan in shock. He has grown stronger since the last time Fang has seen him, which was only a few short months ago. Fang feels weak for one of the first times in his life. He is in a vulnerable position, and the last person he wants to be in a vulnerable position around is Dylan.
"What are you doing here?" Dylan demands. He takes his hands off Fang and brushes them on his pants. Fang is amused—it seems like he is trying to get rid of germs.
"Am I not allowed to see my girlfriend?"
"Ex," Dylan reminds him. "You left her."
"I had to," Fang says curtly. He makes his way around Dylan as if to leave, but Dylan blocks his path with a foot.
"Why did you leave when all you're going to do is watch her?" Dylan asks skeptically. Fang sees Dylan give a little glance toward Max and Iggy on the couch, looking at the window forlornly. "You're not the only important guy in her life anymore." Fang can tell that he is only trying to hide his hurt over the fact that when his main competitor left, Max still chose another guy over him. It has to hurt his man ego, at least a little bit.
Fang coughs awkwardly. "Came here to see you, actually," Fang mumbles, not making eye contact.
"Why? So you can threaten me to stay away from her? She's already done that, you know."
Fang decides to get straight to the point. "I need to make sure Max is okay."
"Then stalk her. You're already doing that anyway," Dylan says exasperatedly.
"I need someone on the inside. To keep me posted on what the flock is doing, I mean." Fang doesn't know what compels him to say this. He does know that he did not intend to say this at first. It was a spur of the moment decision, and the words fly from his mouth before he can take them back. Fang does need someone to keep an eye on the flock, but he assumed that he would be the one to do so, since he isn't going to really leave them anytime soon. But having Dylan as his eyes and ears within the flock makes things so much easier.
Except for the fact that he hates Dylan, of course.
"And you want me to stalk the flock for you?" Dylan says incredulously. Fang doesn't blame him, this is a pretty strange request, especially for someone to make to his enemy. "Is this some kind of joke?"
"No." Fang turns to leave, dismissing it as a lost cause, but Dylan stops him.
"I'll do it," he suddenly says.
Fang turns to look at him, surprised. "What?" he says smartly.
"I'll stalk the flock for you." Dylan already looks uncomfortable with his decision. He looks like he is just about to take it back, when Fang interrupts his thought process.
"Let's shake on it," he suggests.
Dylan hesitates a little before Fang adds, "This is purely a business relationship."
"Yeah," Dylan replies reluctantly. He holds out his hand for Fang to shake. Fang joins their hands in agreement.
One...
"Is she doing okay?" Fang asks at their first meeting. Dylan nods.
"She seems to be over you," Dylan replies, brushing nonexistent lint off his white shirt. Out of the corner of his eye, he watches for Fang's reaction to the news. First, his fists clench, and he looks like he is about to punch somebody.
"Really?" Fang asks, looking defeated.
Dylan does not reply that Max still stares at Fang's photograph sometimes, cursing at him. But whenever she does that, Iggy will comfort her and tell her that everything is okay. They have grown closer than ever.
"Really," Dylan confirms.
Two...
Dylan and Fang meet at a pizza parlor when the rest of the flock is at a CSM safe house nearby. Dylan comes in flushed. He doesn't sit down even as Fang patiently waits for him to do so.
"What's wrong?"
"Max and Iggy have made it official. They're dating now."
Fang feels emotions running through him. The desire to squash Iggy into a pulp. The anger at Max for getting over him when he has obviously not gotten over her. Fang feels betrayed.
He forgets to ask how Dylan is feeling—forgets that they are vying for the same girl.
Three...
Angel finds out that Dylan has been talking to Fang in secret. Dylan takes her to one of his meetings with Fang, surprising the dark-haired boy. When he sees Angel, he reels back in schock.
"What are you doing here?"
"This is a public place. I have as much right to be here as you." She gestures around the park. "And if you don't let me come, I'll tell Max." Angel smirks. Dylan shrugs at Fang behind her back, as if to say that he can't stop her.
Four...
Surprisingly, having Angel along on their little meetings isn't too bad. She eases the tension between Fang and Dylan a little, especially when they start talking about Max. Fang still does not know why she wants in on their meetings, but most of the time, he is glad for the distraction. Whenever he and Dylan start talking about Max, it is all he can do not to rip Dylan's head off.
He doesn't have the right to talk about Fang's girl.
Angel hears this thought and bursts out laughing.
Because she isn't his.
Never really was.
Five...
Fang is almost twenty now, and his teenage years have gone by quickly. He has been working surreptitiously to find out all he can about Dr. Gunther-Hagen and his practices. Unfortunately, he is getting nowhere. Dylan and Fang's meetings have become more and more frequent, and sometimes Angel, now a teenager, doesn't want to come.
Fang finds that their conversations start to have little to do with Max and more on other, irrelevant things. Fang thought that Dylan would stop meeting him as soon as his duty to keep Fang posted on Max is fulfilled. Apparently not.
Six...
Baking cookies has never been so much fun.
The rest of the flock is out on a trip, leaving Dylan home alone. He invites Fang inside to mess with Max's supply of cookie dough. She can't bake cookies anyway, he points out.
Turns out they can't either.
"I will vanquish you," Dylan manages to get out between his guffaws. He throws a cookie at Fang, who dodges it expertly, knowing a burnt cookie to the head will hurt. Fang crouches behind the counter, waiting for Dylan's next move. Dylan leans over the counter to try to pour his whole batch of cookies on Fang all at once.
"Prepare to die," he says ominously. He throws the cookies over the edge of the counter, but Fang moves out of the way quickly. Dylan has exhausted his supply of cookies, and Fang is ready to win.
He pelts Dylan with cookie after cookie until Dylan admits to a crushing defeat.
They proceeded to make a crown out of Elmer's school glue and cookies and place it on Fang's head.
It sticks to his hair, and will not come off until after multiple showers.
Oh, the joys of being an immature 21-year-old.
Seven..
Dylan does not show up to one of their meetings. Fang flies to the safe house where he knows the flock is staying. Dylan is on the computer, playing Solitaire.
"Solitaire?" Fang asks, surprising him. Dylan nearly jumps out of his chair in shock. His hand immediately flies to his hair, which is in disarray because he has just gotten out of bed.
Fang smiles his first natural smile in a long time.
Eight...
Dylan tells Fang that the flock isn't doing much. Max and Iggy's relationship has only grown, and like when she was with Fang, she cannot seem to pay attention to anything else. Fang feels a pang of jealousy as he realizes that Iggy has been with her much longer than Fang ever was.
"At least you were with her at all," Dylan points out. There is a hint of bitterness in his voice.
Fang decides he hates Max a little, just for this.
Nine...
The flock has started doing air shows again. They stopped a few years back, and Fang wonders why they have suddenly decided to start again.
He asks Dylan this, and all he gets is a snicker in reply. Fang raises an eyebrow, waiting for Dylan to elaborate.
"Max will say that she wants to save the planet. She really just wants to be in the center of attention again."
Fang isn't surprised.
Ten...
Fang has started watching Dylan. He knows the location of all the safe houses, thanks to the blond boy, and instead of using these opportunities to watch the supposed love of his life, he uses them to watch Dylan, of all people.
Why not Iggy?
Why not Gazzy?
Why not Angel?
Why not Jeb, even?
Why Dylan?
Why does it have to be like a fucking drug to him?
Eleven...
During their meetings, Fang doesn't tell Dylan what he sees through spying, and he is glad that Angel has stopped coming to them, for she will read his mind and will tell Dylan in a heartbeat. Fang doesn't even want to imagine the embarrassment that will ensue if that happens.
"What are you thinking about?" Dylan asks, sensing that Fang's heart really isn't into the conversation.
Fang blushes, thinking about that time he caught Dylan changing. Luckily, he still had his pants on, but Fang still got a good look at shirtless Dylan. His flat stomach. Hard chest. Hipbones.
Fang blinks, banishing the thought from his head.
"Nothing," Fang tells Dylan. "Nothing at all."
Twelve...
"Does she still remember me?" Fang says to Dylan.
Dylan gets an annoyed look across his face. "Of course she does. You were her best friend."
"Does she really like Iggy?"
"She's been with him for 12 years, I would think she likes him, yeah." Dylan grits his teeth.
Fang shoots him a strange look. "What are you so mad about?"
"It's been twelve years. Get over her." Dylan's volume rises.
And Fang doesn't know what to do.
Thirteen...
"Thirteen. Unlucky number," Dylan comments, as if he is commenting on the weather. This last year has been harsh. There have been fights about Max occurring at any given moment, but in the end, Fang and Dylan pulled through. When Fang doesn't reply, Dylan rolls his eyes. "Would it hurt you to talk to a friend?"
The word slips out before Dylan can really think about it.
"Friend?" Fang smirks.
Dylan sputters something incoherent in response.
"Yeah, we're friends," Fang finally says.
Fourteen...
"If you weren't a mutant, what would you want to be when you grow up?" Dylan asks.
Fang starts at the strange question. Since when does Dylan want to know his hopes and dreams?
"I've always wanted to be a writer, I guess," Fang answers hesitantly. He doesn't know what to make of this question. It is so unexpected, as if Dylan pulled it out of thin air. Never had they talked about what will happen if they are normal, if this burden was not placed upon them.
"What about you?" Fang asks, to be polite.
"I don't know. I've never been good at anything." Dylan shrugs. But Fang has to disagree.
Fifteen...
They decide to go.
"Do you think we'd make more of a difference if we leave than if we stay?" Dylan asks, packing up his bags.
"The flock was made to save the world. And the flock isn't doing anything." Fang's insistent voice is enough to make Dylan be persuaded. Fang doesn't talk much, but when he does...
"I'm in."
They leave without a trace, not even leaving a note.
Sixteen...
If spending time with friends is good for the soul, Fang and Dylan's souls must be pretty damn good by now. Traveling on the roads (or sky), spreading word around about the environment isn't an easy task, especially when no one listens.
The age of technology refuses to be beaten back. They've made a minor difference, at least, and as Dylan points out, at least they did something.
It is no surprise that, after one year, they decide to part ways.
"I'll see you next week," Dylan promises Fang.
"Hope Max doesn't kill you."
Dylan snorts. "She's probably too wrapped up with Iggy to care anyway." Dylan suddenly gets an idea. "Why don't you come back with me? Max has probably forgiven you by now." He looks at Fang earnestly.
Fang shakes his head. "Don't want to talk to Max," he mumbles.
"Then do it for me. We're friends now, right?"
Fang shuts his eyes for a moment, deliberating. Finally, he refuses, leaving Dylan waiting with a dejected expression on his face.
Seventeen...
Pointless.
Nothing has changed in the state of the world since Fang has left. The world hasn't become a better place. Max didn't even end up with Dylan like Fang intended her to.
It's been pointless.
He shouldn't have left.
And he says this out loud, Dylan, sitting next to him, gives him a hug. "You're better off without her anyway," he whispers. "She doesn't deserve you."
Fang lets Dylan keep his arms around him just for comfort. This doesn't mean anything, just contact between friends.
"She doesn't deserve you either," Fang replies.
He believes it. Fang doesn't lie often.
Eighteen...
Fang wakes up next to Dylan on the bed. His first emotion is panic, pure panic. He looks at their state of dress, or lack thereof.
Shit.
He remembers getting drunk last night, then nothing. There is a block in his mind, and blurred images run through. He cannot make sense of them, but he can get the gist, especially when he looks at all the evidence presented to him. He doesn't want to believe it, but he has to. He's an idiot if he doesn't. But he feels relief too. These past few months, it is as if they have been dancing around each other, waiting for something like this to happen.
He shakes Dylan awake. Dylan jumps up groggily and takes in his surroundings slowly.
He drops his mouth in shock.
"What the fuck happened?" he asks angrily. He starts gathering up his clothes again, careful not to make eye contact with Fang.
Then he walks out the door.
And leaves.
Just like that.
Nineteen...
Nothing. Fang has not heard from Dylan in a year. It is as if he has disappeared off the face of the planet.
Absolutely nothing.
Twenty...
Fang waits on the cliff, wondering when someone will show up. He doesn't really expect anyone to, they have probably forgotten all about him. This meeting is supposed to be with Max, but he can't figure out who he wants to see more—Max or Dylan.
He still wonders about why Dylan skipped the last meeting.
If he is mad at him.
Mad about what happened that night.
Fang hasn't seen him for a year.
Hasn't spoken to him.
So much worse than 20 years without speaking to Max, whom he is supposed to "love".
Fang closes his eyes and starts counting. Seconds tick by. One, he thinks.
Two...
Three...
...
Twenty...
"Hey," a familiar voice says behind him. Somehow, Fang is not surprised to hear his voice.
Dylan.
He's just standing there, acting like he didn't ditch Fang, as if the last year of no contact between them has never existed. There's only one thing to say.
"Where have you been?" Fang hisses.
Dylan looks at the ground and says, "I don't know. I was confused."
Fang draws in a shuddering breath. Confused. Of course. Hell, Fang is confused too, but he isn't going to run away, like he did with Max. He is angry, of course, but most of all, he is glad. Glad that this boy he used to hate is here with him now.
Life is messed up sometimes.
Fang looks to the sky again, still waiting for another figure to show. Dylan steps toward him, reaching out an arm toward Fang as if to comfort him. He stops his hand about an inch away from his shoulder. Fang can tell he remembers that night, probably thinks it was a mistake too.
"She's not coming, is she?" Fang asks, staring off into space. For once, his lack of emotion is not only a mask—he really feels nothing. Once upon a time, Max took a piece of his heart, inhabiting it so that there was no room for anyone else. But his heart has his own immune system, and once it saw that he was infected by Max, it had purged itself of thoughts of her, leaving him hollow, empty.
And hollow hearts always search for something else to fill up with.
Dylan shakes his head slowly. Suddenly, it feels like the times when Fang was with the flock again—when Fang and Dylan were fighting for Max and disagreed in all the other ways too. Now, they seem ages apart, even though they are standing next to each other on the same cliff, impossibly close together. They have both grown up from when they were teenagers.
Different people.
Different thoughts.
Different decisions.
And Fang makes a different decision right then.
"Do you love her?" Fang asks Dylan suddenly. Dylan looks at him warily, wondering what spurred him to ask this question. It is a difficult question to answer, definitely. Fang knows Dylan has been by her side for twenty years as her friend. In that time, he has comforted her every time she and Iggy had a falling-out. He could have taken her for himself at any time. He was made for this, being with her.
They are two puzzle pieces that are supposed to fit together perfectly. But over the years, the edge of the puzzle piece has worn out, and when he tries to fit himself with Max, he feels like there's a piece missing. They can be pushed together, mashed together, but they cannot be tailored to fit each other. That is the basic flaw in the scientists' reasoning. They gave him all the tools to be with Max, yet they forgot to give him motivation.
"Yes," Dylan says reluctantly. Fang feels the void between them stretch even more. Twenty years of speaking to each other on the sly and they still haven't filled the void between them.
"You still love her?" Fang asks bleakly.
"I think there's always going to be a part of me that loves her. But I don't want to be with her." Dylan chuckles darkly. "I don't," he reiterates. He reaches out to Fang, grasping his wrist. The gap between the two close tremendously, with just that one movement.
And maybe Max isn't the puzzle piece that is supposed to fit with Dylan after all.
Dylan wraps his arm around Fang tentatively. Fang stiffens in shock, but he lets Dylan keep in contact with him. He can feel the heat of Dylan's arm through his leather jacket and is acutely aware that he hasn't shaved in days and that his stubble is most unbecoming.
"Then who do you want to be with?" Fang says, flustered. There is a blush rising to his cheeks, but he wills himself not to show it. After all, he is supposed to be emotionless and strong and stoic and—
Dylan turns so that he is pressed up against Fang even more than before.
And he isn't supposed to be affected by this.
Dylan presses his lips to Fang's. It takes all of Fang's willpower to not move. After a few minutes, Dylan is the one who begins to gradually move away. Fang locks his arms around Dylan's neck, keeping his lips on Fang's. A jolt of surprise goes through Dylan, but he stays.
When they break away, there are goofy smiles on both of their faces.
"Glad Max didn't show up," says Fang. He takes Dylan's hands, wrapping them with his calloused ones. He doesn't remember feeling like this when he was with Max.
"I wonder what Max will say."
"Screw it." Fang leans to kiss Dylan again.
And the void in between them is nonexistent.
"You always have your way. For now it's too soon for you to say, 'Will we be always, always?'"
-You Me At Six
AN: This is so my new semi-ship. *headdesk* Tired of Fax.
Review?