A/N: I wrote this for a CMDA Secret Santa Exchange for Reyavie. This is my gift to you. lol I'm so glad that you liked it. I hope you had a great holiday! If you haven't read anything of hers, you should! Go! Go now! Well, after you read this. :3 Aaaaand thank you to Saga Svanhildr for reading this over to make sure I wasn't a grammar fail.
One Last Gift
She knew he was coming. From the top of the Circle Tower, Evelyn Amell could see the familiar figure of Cullen on the boat approaching the base of the tower. Her tongue ran over her lower lip for a moment. She hadn't seen him since she had saved the tower from Uldred and his abominations. She had heard that he went to Kirkwall. Why was he back? Evie smiled at the thought. Many had asked that very same question about her. She took a few slow, long breaths as she steadied herself against the window sill. Her days were numbered. Perhaps this was a way for the Maker to allow her to redeem herself. One last gift before her parting.
Evie had heard about her cousin in Kirkwall, and how Anders, her old friend, had blown up the Chantry. In all honesty, she was still mourning his death. Her cousin had disappeared and the city was still rebuilding. But things had changed so much. She was spending her last years back in the Tower, a comfort zone for her, and now the one person who could threaten that peace she had worked so hard for was about to visit. Was that why he was coming? Did he want to play with her head one last time? No. He was coming because of the Champion, she was sure. The Templar Order was hanging by its last strings. Did he think she could give him a lead that could not be found elsewhere? Well, he was going to be disappointed.
A soft smirk played across her features. Well, their relationship had always been like that, hadn't it?
"You cannot spare a maleficar," Cullen argued. "You don't know what Uldred did to these mages."
"Uldred is not the First Enchanter," Evie argued. "If you cannot put your faith in that, then you clearly haven't paid attention to us much since you first arrived."
Cullen stared at her. His mouth gaped open in surprise that she would even take such a tone with him after everything they had been through, but he shut it quickly as his eyes narrowed. "And you would know?" He asked. "Let's not bring up the reason you left here in the first place, Evelyn." The fact that he hadn't called her Evie had stung.
With Alistair, Wynne, and Zevran behind her, she was glad that they couldn't see her face. "I was tricked," she said, her voice wavering.
"I as well," he countered quietly.
He spoke of their first and only kiss. Their relationship had been forbidden and short-lived. Regret was etched onto his face. She nodded slowly and looked away.
"What is it that you think, Gregoir?" She asked.
The Knight Commander glanced between the separate parties before him as he seemed to contemplate each argument. "I have faith in the First Enchanter," he said. "Irving, we will be watching you closely, but for right now we should concentrate on ridding the rest of the Tower of any stragglers left behind."
"And I'm sure we'll be at each other's throats soon after," Irving agreed. The Knight Commander made a motion for the First Enchanter to follow him before he left. Irving stopped and turned to his old apprentice. "Call for us, my child, and we will come."
"Thank you, Irving," she said before he disappeared. Evie looked back at her companions. "Could you give me a moment?" Zevran and Alistair seemed to hesitate before Wynne had to usher them away.
"I have nothing to say to you," Cullen said quickly.
"Please just-"
He held up a hand to stop her from continuing. "What those mages did to me and you still pity them?" He asked.
Evie placed a hand over her heart. "Cullen, I am them."
Her fingers strummed against the top of her desk as she closed her eyes. There was a soft knock at her door. Evie's eyes fluttered open as Cullen came into view. He looked good, worn maybe, but good. He smiled slightly at her.
"First Enchanter," he greeted.
"Come to yell at me?" She asked. One eyebrow raised in question as her lips pursed slightly. She saddled the fine line between defensive and pensive. Self-preservation was something she had been good at, but with the man in front of her, it weakened.
"I am sure that I deserve that," he replied with a sad smile.
She nodded in agreement. "And maybe a little more." Evie sighed heavily. "I don't know where my cousin is. That Chantry Seeker has already stopped by and asked."
Cullen moved in closer and she felt her heart pound against her chest. Old feelings die hard. Zevran and Alistair had offered her comfort after she and Cullen had last parted ways, but they would only have been a distraction and they deserved more. They deserved better. "That's not why I'm here," he told her.
"Come to make peace, then?" Her voice was more bitter than she had expected it to be. Her heart had been broken by his doing. Every time she thought she was mending, something involving him always happened to break it again. "Please. Stop there, Cullen. Don't come any closer."
But he didn't listen. He moved to stand next to her and she realized that he wasn't wearing Templar armor. What…what was he up to?
"I am aware that I've hurt you in the past, Evie," he said. "It took me a long time to work up the courage to face you again. I should have come sooner, I know. It was by my weakness that I didn't."
She bit her lower lip. Not again. She wanted to put her guard up but when he took her hand into his, she was done for. She wanted to be strong. Why couldn't she be? She killed the Archdemon, the Architect, and the Mother. She faced death and laughed in its face, but for that one touch, she was putty.
"Cullen…" her voice trailed off. It was too late for her to argue. He didn't look like he was going to be scared off easily. She almost preferred the old him.
"I am aware," he began as he brushed his finger tips against her cheek. He tucked some of her hair behind her ear and smiled sadly, "of the time you have left." He looked away as he sucked in a deep breath. "And if you will have me, I wish to spend that time with you."
"I'm still a mage you know," she reminded him quietly.
"And I am no longer a Templar."
That caught her by surprise. She had heard rumors that he was offered the position of Knight Commander in Kirkwall where the attempts to keep the Circles together had been the most successful. "Why?" She asked.
"It is not the same as it once was," he replied. "And… I missed you."
Evie stood up from her desk and pulled her hand away from his. "I never thought that I would hear you say that after our last meeting."
"I was a fool."
"You don't have to tell me twice."
Cullen turned away. "Will it be like this for the rest of your time?" He asked quietly. "I don't know how many times that I will have to apologize, but I will atone forever if you wish."
Evie moved towards him as she placed a hand on his shoulder. She turned him to face her and smiled softly. "No," she replied, "I'm sorry. It's just… I never expected this."
"Then take it for what it is," Cullen said as he turned to face her. He wrapped his arms around her.
Her eyes stared him down for a moment. Was she dreaming? Had she given in to some Desire Demon that she couldn't remember? Well, if that was the case, then she had received a good deal. "What is it between us then?"
"You're the one woman…that I have- er- ever been comfortable with." He still struggled after all this time. He wanted to hear it. She needed to hear it. Evie closed her eyes and rested her head against his chest.
"Anything else?" She asked quietly. Cullen ran his fingers through her hair gently and kissed the top of her head.
"I love you."
The Maker worked in mysterious ways. Her Calling was in a few years. Could she put him through that? It was selfish of her to want to. Evie pulled back and touched the side of his face and moved her hand to rest on his shoulder. "It won't be easy," she said.
A small laugh escaped him. "Nothing that's worth it ever is." Oh, how that was so true.
She pulled his head down to her and their lips met, softly at first, until a feverish passion had taken over. It was like their first time so long ago, when they had snuck away into the deepest part of the tower's libraries. It was like no time had passed between them. Was this her reward for everything she had done? Then she would gladly take it.
"Oh, Cullen," she said into the kiss. "I love you too."
