Authors Note: This was written for papillongirl for the mary_marshall secret snowflake event. The prompt was "Mary/Eleanor where Mary realizes that she loves Marshall" I hope that this works. Not bettaed so I hope that there aren't any glaring errors.
Wedding Bells
If Mary had to pick a day to be working late, and by herself, this was it. Stan and Eleanor, and most of the rest of the shadows in the background of the Witsec office were all gone. Not that that was unusual for a Saturday, but today she could hear the fridge in the break room humming from her desk.
In thinking, she knew that she shouldn't be there either, but she just couldn't bring herself to leave. If she left she couldn't go home. There was no one there. Jinx was in her own apartment, living the life Mary had always wanted her too, supporting herself, not drinking, being happy and content. And Brandi…since she moved in with Peter she'd been living the life befitting of a "real housewife". And she was busy today too, busy the same place every one else was.
He was getting married today. Her best friend. She never thought it would happen for him. Really, she thought that it would be more likely for her to get back together with Raph than it was for Marshall to get married. And to a school teacher no less.
A perky little brunet, too young for him, and everything that Mary wasn't. Brigid was smart, she might be teaching third graders for a living, but Marshall had told Mary that they'd met at a class they had both been taking at the community college. Something stupid she recalled, watching old black and white movies and then talking for hours on end about them.
She should have known that something was going on when he started talking about her. He never talked about the women he dated. As far as she knew he didn't date. The occasional "hook up" at the local bar, and that teacher of his at the basketball game, but he'd walked away from that when it had gotten more serious.
But slowly they spent less and less time together. Sure she'd been pulling away first, after Raph and that disastrous experience with Faber, but that was no reason for Marshall to start dating another woman, fall in love with another woman. Not that Mary was in love with him…or he with her for that matter, but it wasn't fair for him to call the shots in their relationship, he'd never done that. Not since the first day they'd met. It was her job to do that.
So here she was, on what was probably going to be the happiest day of her partners' life, sitting in the office, alone. Alone like she was going to be for the rest of her life. She needed a drink. She opened the bottom drawer in her desk, since Marshall had started dating Little Ms Perfect her alcohol had been lasting longer. She was less likely to open up her stash and find it gone with a note written in Marshall's drunken scrawl saying he would replace it.
Forgoing the glass sitting next to the bottle she simple took a swig right off the bottle. SO engrossed was she on her grieving for what was sure to be the end of her partnership with Marshall she failed to hear the elevator dinging it's arrival on the top floor, or the beep as someone keyed their way into the locked portion of the witsec offices.
"I thought I'd find you here." A voice said, barely hiding disapproval.
"You don't work for us anymore, how'd you get a key." Mary didn't look at the person who spoke, instead taking another swig of the scorching liquor.
"I'm shagging the boss." Mary wasn't sure what reaction was expected to that bit of wisecrack, but alcohol squirting out her nose probably wasn't it. As she coughed up the liquid that had entered her lungs she could hear the woman in front of her laughing.
"Please, never mention Stan and shagging in the same sentence again."
"No promises, Mary."
"What are you doing here Eleanor?" Mary asked, finally putting the bottle back in her desk, saving the rest for when she was again alone.
"I'm looking for you."
Mary snorted, wondering if she put the booze away too soon.
"I'm serious. I got to the wedding of a man who I thought was very important to you only to find him in a tizzy because his best friend isn't answering the phone and hasn't showed up for the most important day of his life."
"He's too busy to notice I'm missing."
"I think you're mistaking the bride for the groom. All the man does on the wedding day is put a tux on and then wait for the bride. They have a lot of time to think about things that could go wrong. They rely on their best man to help them calm down, to focus on what's important, the woman who's going to be walking down the aisle towards them in an hour."
"His best man is there." Mary said with a sneer, remembering the conversation with Marshall three months before where she'd learned that she wouldn't be the best man as she'd thought.
"Come on Mary. You only get married once." Marshall had said
"Ideally. If you're my family you get married multiple times, without divorces."
"I want this to be perfect for Brigid, and she wants her bridesmaids walking down the aisle with my groomsmen and her maid of honor walking down the aisle with my best man. I know her maid of honor; she's not going to walk down the aisle with a woman."
"Oh, and you've got so many other people waiting in line to stand up with you?" She was hurt, and she didn't care if he knew it.
"I've got two brothers Mary. And Stan. And friends outside of work." She was sure he hadn't meant it as a threat, but that's how it had come out.
"And so is the rest of his family and friends. But do you know who's not there?"
Mary didn't answer, just pulled a dirty look.
"Oh grow up! What are you, 12? You're his best friend! I don't care if you don't like his fiancé, you should be there!"
"He's leaving me! I'm not leaving him." Mary shot back, not thinking.
"Leaving you? How's that?"
Mary opened her mouth to speak, but closed it again. How was Marshall leaving her? He was getting married, but people did that all the time. But that's what was happening. He was getting married and he wasn't going to be her Marshall anymore. But why should it matter. She could make more friends, Charlie wasn't all that bad. And she could still be friends with Marshall…couldn't she? But it wouldn't be the same. He wouldn't flirt with her.
And why would that bother her? It shouldn't. But it did. He wouldn't flirt with her; he wouldn't be there in the morning early, waiting with coffee and donuts, even if only to eat them in front of her.
"Do you know what your problem is?" Eleanor asked, breaking into Mary's thoughts. "You're selfish. You expect everyone to be perfect, but expect them to over look your flaws and bow to your every whim."
"Would you shut up?" Mary snapped getting up from behind her desk to pace around the room. Eleanor was right. Not that Mary would ever tell her that. She expected Marshall to just stay stagnate and never change while she was able to go and do whatever she wanted. Why was that? She thought over her relationships since she'd known Marshall. The look on his face when she told him that she was engaged. His inability to speak when she told him that it was off. All the advice over the years about following her heart and slowing down…He loved her. That's why he'd stayed, and why she was losing him now.
"Oh my God. I'm in love with Marshall."
"Oh my God. Did you just…How long…Well it's about time!" Eleanor stumbled over her words, but finally managed to get over her shock enough to voice what she'd know since almost the first time meeting the partners.
"What the hell if that supposed to mean?"
"You've been in love with him since I met you. Probably longer. Anyone could see that."
"I—" Mary stopped. She had no comeback for that. "He's loved me longer."
"I know." Eleanor didn't say anything else, just stood there, watching as Mary visibly shaken, sank into a random chair that seemed to appear as if out of nowhere.
She thought about her engagement to Raph, she often thought of that, and the party thrown for her at work. Marshall had told her that he loved her, and she'd known that he meant as more than just a friend. She'd known then, but shoes to simply ignore it. She shouldn't have.
"He's getting married." Almost a whisper.
"Yes, he is." Eleanor had moved closer, knelt down and put a hand on Mary's where it was resting on her knee.
"I can't stop it. I waited too long." Her voice was full of sadness and misery at what she'd lost, and what could never be.
"Maybe." Eleanor said, the tone of her voice conveying both doubt and hope.
"I should be at his wedding. He would want me there." Mary brushed Eleanor's hand away and stood up, sighing. Casting a longing glance at the desk drawer that held her drink, she grabbed her keys and headed out the door, Eleanor following closely, not wanting her to lose her nerve.
"It'll be alright, you never know what will happen." But Mary did. She would go to Marshall's wedding, watch as her best friend married a woman too young and too pretty for him, dance at the reception, and then go home, alone, to spend the rest of her life, wanting what she couldn't have.