Matters Of The Heart

by HJ Russo

Ross fell in love with someone that was supposed to be off limits. He was with somebody else too but he couldn't help but who his heart really wanted. And how his one choice to fall in love with someone who he wasn't supposed too Ended up causing so much damage and destruction. And how will Ross also deal with something being kept from him?

Matters Of The Heart

By HJ Russo

Rating :T

Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot.

Summary: Ross fell in love with someone that was supposed to be off limits. He was with somebody else too but he couldn't help but who his heart really wanted. And how his one choice to fall in love with someone who he wasn't supposed too Ended up causing so much damage and destruction. And how will Ross also deal with something being kept from him?

Author's Note: Yeah I know I have been MIA for a while now and the last thing that I should be doing now is adding another story to my long list of stories. The truth of the matter is I have had not only major writer's block but I have things going on, so I apologize for the wait On Roar and FFY. I promise those will be updated soon and I may even get around to The Miles we Travel and Stealing Forever.

Couplings: You will find out as the story progresses. :D

1.

Hell.

That is where he is at right in this moment in his life. He was in the lowest level of hell right now as that is what it felt like for him. He really wasn't sure on how this stared it if he was honest with himself. No that would be an absolute lie and Ross was sick of lying anymore. That is all that he has been doing for years now. Lying to himself and to others for years now and Ross was getting sick of it. It was tearing himself apart from the inside out. He really didn't know when his life became a bad copy of those over dramatic teen drama's that you would see on TV. If Ross was really honest with himself he would tell himself that this has been going on ever since they meet, all those years ago.

But he was scared. And if anything Ross didn't like that feeling at all, he had perfected the façade of not showing any weakness like that. He had always made a big deal of showing the world that nothing could unnerve the great Ross Lynch. He was so good at it that he even managed to fool himself.

Ross sighed. Currently he was lying low in his apartment that he had been sharing with someone who was supposed to be the love of his life. The feelings were there so he wasn't completely lying about that. He did love Laura; the first moment that he meet her at the audition for Austin and Ally all those years ago there was something there. And he took it as a sign that what he had been feeling before was just a fluke of being lonely and that with Laura he really didn't have to worry about that anymore. And they had been happy, for many years even after the show. They had been the perfect couple that so many of their fans were clamoring to get together and when they made it official there was just nothing like it. Ross and Laura were both amazed and a little scared at the reaction of how so many people were interested in their love life. But at the end of the day they didn't let it bother them as they were happy and that was the only thing that mattered. He could still recall the moment that he knew he could be happy with her and settle for a life that would bring happiness to others and himself.

That is if he wanted to settle. And yes he knows that sounds awful and a really shitty thing to say about the woman who was becoming his girlfriend and lover and who happened to be his very best friend. When he told her he loved her, he wasn't lying. He did love her, but it wasn't the burning in your soul kind of passion that would consume a person. It was more like a Best friend who loves their best friend because you are like family. Ross knows he should have never gotten involved with Laura with the way that he was feeling. But Ross thought that with time he would be able to get over it and be truly happy with her, they had been so very happy before. But as time went on he realized that it was because they had a relationship that was based off friendship and Ross wouldn't trade it for the world. He loved Laura like she was family, and he never wanted to cause her a moment of pain. That is why that he made the decision to stop the doubts and the uneasiness of the situation and just focus on her. And for a while it seemed to work.

Until one late night after making love both of them completely wiped out and Laura fell asleep on his chest and he wrapped his arm around her and as she was falling asleep she told him that she loved him.

" I Love You Ross."

Four simple words that were meant to make him happy only caused him a feeling that he didn't want. And that was guilt. Because as she was in his bed because she wanted to be, all he could think was that he wished someone else was here with him naked lying together as they cemented their love.

Yeah he knows he is a complete asshole.

And he was pretty sure that he sealed his place in hell for what he was doing. He wasn't supposed to want someone else when he was with someone who was so perfect and who the world considered to be his soul mate.

Ross threw head back on the couch pillow as he drowned his sorrows threw liquor and just tried to make sense of how his life was this shitty version of a teen drama. All he wanted was to close his eyes and just wish this whole thing away. He wished that he never stared this relationship with Laura as then he could prevent her heartbreak that he knew was coming because of who she chooses to love. And also to save the friendship the two of them had, as he knew that was long gone and as soon as she realized that she wasted years loving someone who couldn't love her the way that she deserved to then he would soon face the fact that he would lose her completely and that was the last thing that he wanted. They had such a good beginning as friends, why did he cross that line when he knew that it would only cost them everything. Because he was pretty damn sure she was going to hate him. Ross could feel the sting of tears hitting his eyes as he realized how completely fucked up he was. Who would do this to someone who was so perfect and right in every way? Laura was beautiful and nice and smart. She was completely happy and loved to make people around her feel special, because that is what she loved doing and that was the thing that made him love her. She really was faultless.

Well that was a tiny bit untrue.

The only fault that she had was that her name wasn't Ellington Ratliff.

The thought of his best friend, his other best friend,the one who started R5 with him made Ross feel elated and scared shitless all at the same time. The moment he first meet Ellington he could feel something inside of him to let Ross know that he was something special. But he really wasn't paying attention as he had been ten at the time he meet Ellington. Who in their right mind at that age would realize that what he had been feeling was love? And to be honest as soon as Ross began to understand that it was exactly that he was scared more than ever. He didn't want to have these feelings as he knew what that meant.

It would mean that he was gay.

And he knew what some people thought of gay people and it wasn't pretty. Sure a majority of the people he came in contact with was accepting a lot more people were becoming more and more tolerant and accepting of gay people. But there were still people out there that would love to see gay people hurt or even dead. And as much as he loved his brothers that didn't stop him from fearing their reaction to them finding out that their brother was gay and in love with their mutual best friend.

It would just ruin things. He knew that once it got out things would never be the same. Both personally and professionally. Because even though Austin and Ally has been over for years and he hasn't done anything Disney related since he was still considered a good role model and a Disney boy. And he knew parents of his fans may have a problem on who he loved. He knew there was a chance that it could cost them everything.

They had moved out to California so their dreams could come true, so would it be fair for Ross to ruin that for everyone one else including Ellington?

Now can you understand why he was feeling like he was in hell? Not only was he caught in between of being true to himself and love who he was really in love with or keeping everyone else happy. It was fair to any of them but it was what it was and really Ross didn't want to cause anymore chaos then he already has. Ross sighed again as he realized the only thing that he was doing right now was making himself sick, he really was tired of all this shit, all he wanted was to shout out who he was and who he loved. As much as he wanted to not hurt anyone, did that mean he had to continue to hurt himself? Ross would like to think that he would have the balls to not do that as you can tell he really doesn't have the balls to man up and be honest. Sure Laura and others could be hurt when this came out, but in the long haul it would be more beneficial for people to have everything out in the open. But of course he wasn't going to do that.

He was Ross Shor Lynch, the pussy that couldn't be truthful and go for what he wanted. He was the one who would rather let others live their life based on his lie then to tell the truth about who he was.

Yep he totally was the role model everyone thought he was. Someone who was lying to everyone including himself. Because he knew all this would blow up in his face as he knew the truth has always found a way to come out.

The sound of thunder brought Ross back from his self-hatred as he realized as he looked over at the time and realized that it was after midnight and realized that Laura still wasn't home. He realized that she should have been home hours ago as she went out to visit Raini and her husband as it had been a while that she seen them, and Ross was starting to get worried that something happened as the storm was getting pretty loud and bad and she always made sure that she called him to let him know if she was going to be late and he looked through his call log and realized that she didn't call him. The last thing that he wanted was for her to be hurt or even worse. It was bad enough that she was with someone who couldn't love her like she needed him too. She was his best friend above anything else and if something happened to her then he would never forgive himself. Ross got up from the couch and he was going to look for her when he realized that he was in no condition to be driving as he had been drinking. Fuck he muttered as he dropped his keys back on the table and sat back down. He couldn't even go out and see if his best friend was alright because he was a complete fuck up and couldn't seem to do anything right. Ross kicked the coffee table as he realized the situation he was in. He knew that something was going to come ahead and that everyone would be left somehow damaged by all of this.

The sound of the rain hitting the glass window couldn't wash away the guilt that she was feeling. She really was an awful person. She knows what she is doing is wrong and that she has a place in hell reserved for her. But that doesn't stop her from coming here night after night. In her defense it only became a nightly thing when the truth couldn't no longer be denied.

That she was in a relationship that was no longer happy for her or for him. She knew that Ross was pulling away from her for years now. But she knew that he didn't want to hurt her that's why she really couldn't be mad at him. She knew that a part of him did love her, but it really wasn't like how a man is supposed to love a woman that he was in love with. It was more like a family type of love. A love that got twisted as they got caught up in what the world wanted for them both. Ever since the show Raura fans have always wanted to see them together and Laura knows they meant well and she was actually flattered that they would want her with Ross, the both of them just let it dictate them and their choices and that is how they are in the mess that they are in right now. She knows that the only two people that are to blame are her and Ross. And she knew that this situation was on her just as much as it was on Ross. It may even be more on her as she knows that even though he isn't in love with her, he never once stepped out on her. He wouldn't dare think about cheating on her. That wasn't in him and for a long time really all the way up until this point she thought she was incapable of the same thing.

But it turns out she was wrong. Because she currently is lying here in someone else's bed, someone that wasn't Ross. But the thing was that despite her feeling guilty about hurting Ross she really couldn't regret this. It was wrong as all hell but she couldn't stop. He made her feel incredible something that was missing in her relationship with Ross. Something that she couldn't stop even if she wanted too. And at this point she wasn't wanting too.

If only her fans could see her now. Instead of the perfect ideal Ally Dawson they saw her as; she was behaving like some slut in heating. Cheating on the one person they thought was her Happily Ever After. She could only imagine what everyone would say about her once the truth comes out. And she knows that it will, it may not be today or even tomorrow but she knew that it will eventually, and that day she knew she would have to face up to what she has done. Everyone will not look at her the same way. Her fans would turn against her as she was the one who had been betraying their perfect Ross. And in their minds that was a crime that went against nature. Not only that she would have her family be disappointed in her so very much she could only imagine the look of disappointment in her father's eyes as he would learn that the good daughter that he and her mother raised her into be turned into a ungrateful whore who would spread her legs at the first sign of trouble. Her mother would probably just be really disappointed in her and Vanessa wouldn't say anything to her she would be there for Laura, but she knew that Vanessa wouldn't really approve for what she has been doing. Not to mention Ross's family, The relationship she built with them would be completely ruined after they learned that she betrayed their Ross. She would hate to think that any of them would look at her with disgust because she loved them so much was it really pal sable for them not too?

This whole situation was a complete fucking mess. And she knew that she was responsible for it. Because even if Ross was pulling away from her, did that excuse for her to find comfort from someone else? No she could have put on her big girl panties and told Ross what was going on and the two of them could have ended their farce relationship before it ruined them. Now don't get her wrong she did love Ross and at one point she thought she could be in love with him, but as time went on she knew that the two of them just got caught up in the notion of them being together. You know the fantasy of what it would be like to meet and fall in love at first sight and have everything be complete. But the only thing was that it wasn't what they thought it would be. And Ross was everything that you would think a good boyfriend should e, he was attentive caring and made her feel loved. But the thing that was missing was the passion behind the words, sure he said the words but at the time that he was saying that she couldn't help but think that he was wishing he was saying that to someone else.

And you would think that would break her heart right? To make her hate him so much that it would destroy her. To know that he was in way using her to get over whomever he truly wanted to be with. But Laura didn't have the strength to hate him. Because she was in the same position. That is why she was here right now in this moment because she too had someone that captured her heart , and he was the only thing that could take her breath away.

Laura sighed. This whole situation sucked. As Laura was lost in her thoughts of what has become her life, she could feel his hands starting to roam over her body and as with each time it sent her into a nirvana. The man sure knew how to work his hands and to make her feel good.

" God baby your body is like my wonderland, it is so soft and exactly what I need. You like what I am doing to you?" he muttered as he placed kisses up her neck before capturing her lips in a brief but sizzling kiss that made her wet between her legs. The power this man had over her, it was like he had complete control over her head, heart and body. All Laura could do was muttering an incoensive word as the pleasure was starting to overwhelm her. And once again all thoughts of Ross left her mind.

" I Love you." Laura moaned as he gently moved her legs apart and slide his way in-between her legs carefully placing himself above her. He didn't want to crush her, but he couldn't stand his body not touching hers. He could feel the heat coming off her in waves and just knowing that she still wants him after all this time and how much she wants him, just like how much he wants her was something he would never get tired of. He knew what they were doing was wrong and people would wither be hurt or be all judgmental about them. And he really hated seeing anyone in pain but at the same time he couldn't regret this because he was finally with the woman that he has been in love with ever since he first meet her all those years ago on the set of Austin and Ally. She had haunted his dreams ever since. Sure he was older then her but what was age when it comes to love? Sure she was younger in the sense of number but she was an old soul so wise and smart and her beauty took his breath away.

He had planned on asking her out when she turned eighteen but life took a turn that got in his way and that was her relationship with Ross. Once she got together with Ross he had thought he had lost all chance of being with her. And he was okay because he still had her friendship. He figured that it was better to have her in his life as a friend then not to have her in it at all. And for the most part he was happy for whatever he got from her. But as time went on and as he noticed that things were changing between Ross and Laura for the worst, he couldn't help but notice that she was leaning on him more and more, and like he would ever turn her away. Laura and him started to spend more and more time together and he realized that he was definitely in love with her, There was no doubt about it anymore and that he was tired of always being the one giving up his happiness for everyone else. So as soon as he knew that things were really rocky between her and Ross he told her how he felt.

Well it did help that he was drunk at the time because he really didn't think he would have the guts otherwise to tell her. So after one night of feeling sorry for himself, Laura had come over after another lonely night waiting for Ross, They had started watching movies to keep them selves from thinking about anything else. But by the time she had showed up he had almost finished a bottle of Jack Daniels so his good judgment was all out of the window by that point. So how did he start that conversation?

He kissed her. She had pulled back and he thought she was going to slap him and curse him out; he was planning on apologizing to her even if it as a lie. She did something that surprised him; she kissed him this time being the one to initiate it. And with that any chance of stopping and going back was no longer an option. Before long she was under him as he thrusted hard and fast into her. And the two of them just let their bodies take over and nothing could be heard but moans and the sound of their bodies coming together. That was the start of them being something more than friends, and the start of them hurting someone they both loved and cared for. It was wrong and Ross will kick his ass for it once he finds out, and everyone else will be completely disappointed in him.

Because how could he do this to his own brother?

But with the sound of Laura Cumming and calling out his name, and him pouring his own release into her, Riker really couldn't help but think that in the end it will be worth it. Because wasn't love worth fighting for and all that? And if Ross and Laura were really meant to be, then why was she here with him and not Ross? Riker knew that Laura was in love with him and not Ross but this whole situation was completely fucked up that no matter which way he looked at it, it would blow up in everyone's faces and things will never be the same. But as his slick body collapsed against Laura and she wrapped her legs around him, letting her feet rest on his ass, he really couldn't really care.