WHERE EXACTLY IS KOREA?

One man goes on a quest. A quest to find the answer to a question. And that question is: Where the heck is Korea? In that restraunt in the wall market, there is a meal called the Korean Barbecue. Now, having had that meal and one or two beers too many, one man decides to find the answer to that burning question. He also decides to find some medicine for his burning indigestion, but that is not the main thing. Who is that man?

CID: Me! falls over, hiccuping> Ohhh, my stomach…

So, having decided to go on a great quest for Korea, Cid stumbles out of Midgar and makes his way onto the Highwind, where his team is waiting.

CID: ALRIGHT! HOIST SAIL AND TAKE UP ANCHOR! hiccups and starts to mumble> or is it sail hoist and anchor uptake? hmmm….

BARRET: Ummm…Cid? Aren't you like not supposed to drink and drive?

CID: Drive? Who said anything about driving, Ballet?

BARRET: Its Barret, Cid.

CID: That's what I said. Anyway, I'm not driving. I'm flying! Leaps over to controls and takes the Highwind waaaaaay up into the air, hurling off Yuffie, who was busy tanning on the deck.>

YUFFIE: I'll get you, Cid! You, and your little dog, too! uses her stolen transform materia to become the wicked witch of the west, and flies across right in front of the main window.>

CLOUD: Wow!

CID: Yeah, I know! That barbecue was amazing! Now, anyone got any TUMs?

Aeris begins to rummage around in her purse as the Highwind flies off, sorta swervingly, into the distance. After a few days of this, everyone was getting tired of constantly getting thrown up against the walls, except for Vincent, who could just hover and stay in one place.

VINCENT: I should've bought that car…

Eventually, Cloud and Tifa got fed up with this and drove off into the distance on Cloud's motorcycle. They were headed for Costa Del Sol, for a much needed vacation from saving the world.

AERIS: Why did Cloud go to all the trouble of ressurecting me if he didn't love me?

BARRET: Because they need you for the movie. Clouds over you. He's in love with Tifa now.

AERIS: Then why should I stay?

BARRET: How does 1,000,000 gil sound to you?

AERIS: Yeah…I guess I could stay.

A few days later, you could hear Cid's drunken singing all over the ship.

CAIT SITH: Shouldn't Cid be sober by now?

AERIS: Go and look at him.

So Cait Sith went up to a bridge where he saw Cid singing…

CID: 15 men on a dead man's chest…Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum… Takes a swig out of his bottle of rum>

CAIT SITH: Ahhh… I see.

AERIS: Mm-hm

CID: Hey, Aeris, whatever happened to my TUMs? My stomach still hurts.

AERIS: Ummm…. sorry. I don't have any.

CID: Aaargh! I must go to Mideel and see a doctor!

And so they flew off to Mideel, where the doctor told Cid something.

DOCTOR: You have to stop drinking.

CID: NEVER! Runs far, far away, and dives into the lifestream screaming about Korea.>

Red XIII: I'm not goin in after him.

BARRET: Me neither.

AERIS: Not it!

CAIT SITH: Dang, guys… c'mon…

So, they sent Cait Sith into the lifestream after him, but Cid was nowhere to be found. Where was he? The lifestream had transported him into Korea, and he was currently sitting in a jungle surrounded by Koreans with guns.

KOREANS: speak Korean>

CID: Got any Tums? Or barbecue?

END... for now