Disclaimer: Screw it. I'll do the D/G one later.

There was a time where I never would have put up with it. There was a time where I would have never let myself get so far into a relationship that pulling out would have a devastating effect. That time is over and I've officially reached that point. That horrifying screech in the brakes as the car goes out of control, spiraling into a chasam of a nightmarish reality. That's where I am.

But there is a reason for my cowardice. Well... two reasons. One, I would prefer not to delve into. The other, I would presume is quite obvious. My husband. What a man... oh how stupid I had been. He had seemed so perfect. But then again, when you're distraught, any comforting body seems perfect. At the stupid age of nineteen and against what Harry deemed as immoral, I married the man. Maybe it was because I was lonely and heartbroken... no matter... what's done is done and now... I have to deal with it. Every single day.

"Are you sure you know what your doing?"

That had been his final question before he had walked me down the isle. Harry had reluctantly accepted the man, though he was not warm with him and has never been that way when it came to my husband.

"Of course."

That had been my idiotic answer. Of course? Of course?! What had I been thinking?! It doesn't matter now, but I still ask myself that question. I shouldn't be thinking these thoughts though. I have no proof. Just the nagging feeling everytime he comes in late. Maybe it's just post-pregnancy stress.

Post-pregnancy stress my arse. I had Lily eleven months ago... I'm over it. Maybe it's just work related stress. Yeah... that's it.

I'm hopeless. I'm hopeless and I've become a coward. I'm simply not strong enough anymore. That fight was taken seven years ago. Now... That part of me sleeps... waiting for it's chance to break free again. To be alive...

Sincerely,

HJB

Sighing, she laid down the quill and closed the small, black leather book. She leaned back and opened the drawer, placing the diary in it and then closing it. Standing, she moved to the window, watching the sun rise silently, the rays dancing off her long wavy hair. She rubbed her arm, turning to the bed. It was empty. He was still on his business trip. Sweden. Pulling her hair back in a messy bun she walked out of the bedroom and down the stairs, sighing once more. This was how it was. This is how Hermione lived.

A/N: Extremely short, but to the point. R/R!!!