I own nothing but the peanut butter in my kitchen.
You held him at night because the "real" you wasn't there to. He called out the name belonging to the "real" you when he awoke from the nightmares that plagued his restless sleep. You would whistle and chirp softly to him, attempting to calm him, trying to be everything he thought the "real" you was, everything he needed the "real" you to be.
Sure, at times he was affectionate towards you, but you knew he was thinking of the "real" you. You'd never have his love, you knew that. His love, his heart, belonged to the you of this timeline. The "real" you. You were nothing but a realistic, feathery stand-in for the true object of his affection. You knew this from the start, though he may not think of you in this way. But it is true. You can see it in the way he looks at you, hear it when he speaks to you, feel it in his light, fleeting touch and his warm breath when it blows across your skin.
It's unbearable, to think you might lose him again. Not to an enemy or death this time, but to yourself. To the "real" you. That too is unnerving, the way he refers to him as the "real" you. How you refer to him as the "real" you. There is no difference between that bastard besides the fact that you are a half-bird, orange, freak-of-nature sprite. You could do anything he could, yet he was the "real" you. No matter how hard you tried, he would always be the "real" you.
At times, you didn't care what he called you. These are the times when he allows you to kiss him, trail your hands down his sides and hips, during these moments you couldn't care less about not being the "real" you. Your hands would ghost through his hair, his stroking your feathers and face, causing you to shiver ever so slightly. During these times, he seems to forget that you are not the "real" you. He moans the name of the "real" you into your ear, as if you were him, whispering that he loves you, he loves you so much...
But you are not the "real" you, he does not love you as much as he says. You are Davesprite, and John will never love you as he loves the "real" you.