Sometimes, Milla thinks of running.
She could do that, if she tried. She could swipe some gald, get out of town, hop a train in the dead of night and be long gone before anyone ever noticed. She could run and run and keep on running, until these people who destroy dimensions and kill billions on a regular basis can't find her anymore, can't hurt her anymore. She could run and live by herself, away from all this destruction and pain, not giving a damn about whether or not the prime dimension goes kaput along with all the others.
In Drellin after Epsilla, Milla thinks only of running, because the moment the fractured Rollo disappeared before her eyes, she knew the truth. If this group wanted the prime Milla back, they would have to eliminate the fractured—and considering how many fractured beings they've already erased, Milla doesn't doubt they would do the same to her.
So she has to run.
When night falls, everyone retreats to Drellin's inn, and though Milla brushes her teeth and slides into bed and closes her eyes, she doesn't sleep. Instead, Milla waits, her ears keyed in to every tiny yawn, every audible shift of Leia or Elize or Elle in the other beds. Milla waits so long that she almost falls asleep herself, until finally, all is quiet and still, and only then does Milla dare to slide out of bed.
None of the others so much as stir, and she promptly takes her leave through the window.
The streets appear empty—clearly nobody wants to be up and about the city at four in the morning—but even so, Milla opts to sneak through the dark alleyways rather than bolt straight for the city entrance, proceeding with both an alert mind and a heavy heart. She sees no witnesses, but the few dimly lit windows in the buildings overhead seem to glare down at her almost accusingly; the small pouch of only a few thousand gald she brought with her (despite everything, Milla would feel bad about taking any more from Ludger when he still has that debilitating debt to pay) weighs like an anchor in her hand.
Even as she runs, Milla knows she has nowhere to run to.
Her dimension is gone, and with it, everything she ever called home. The Nia Khera here isn't her Nia Khera, and besides, if Ludger and the others wanted to find her later, that would be the first place they'd look. Wherever she goes from here, she'll be going in blind, with nobody at her side and nothing in her possession but her sword, the clothes on her back, and enough stolen money to keep her fed for a week at best. Still, Milla desperately tells herself, whatever's waiting for her out there has to be better than being killed here.
Finally, Milla arrives at the plaza that marks the city entrance, stepping out into the open from underneath the overhangs—and her breath instantly catches in her throat.
Drellin, as it turns out, is positively gorgeous at night. Though the plaza is empty, the sky above is remarkably clear and crowded with stars. The huge rotund window of the tallest, towering building now reflects the moonlight, giving off a brilliant shine that Milla hadn't seen during the day, illuminating the area in conjunction with several streetlights so that the whole scene is aglow.
Despite how she ought to be hasty in making her escape, Milla instead strolls slowly towards the fountain, keeping her gaze fixed towards the sky. She stops where pavement nearly glimmers and just stands there, letting herself bask in the ethereal light. In the back of her mind, a voice whispers that she should probably hurry, but it'll be several hours at least before the others wake up and notice her absence, and she has one hell of a runaway ahead of her. Surely there's no harm in pausing for a few minutes to relax and gather her thoughts…
"Milla?"
Oh shit—!
At the call of her name, Milla practically leaps out of her skin, her heart racing as she abruptly whirls around to face whoever just spoke. A blur of pink greets her, though, and Milla's heartbeat tempers out just slightly as the small figure she recognizes as Elle comes dashing up to her, blue eyes sparkling in the light when she gets close.
The pouch of money suddenly seems ever heavier. Milla immediately hides it behind her back.
"Elle, what are you doing here?!" Milla barks out, panicked, then internally cringes once she realizes how suspicious that probably sounded. If Elle noticed that anything was off, though, she doesn't show it. "A-aren't you supposed to be asleep?"
Never mind that the same could be asked of Milla, but Elle thankfully doesn't try to shoot the question back and only looks down at her shoes shyly.
"I woke up to get a glass of water," Elle says, shifting on her heels. "I was gonna go back to bed, but then I remembered that when Daddy took me here, we saw the plaza at night, and it was amazing. I just wanted to see it again before the sun came up." She looks back up, locking gazes with Milla. "Is that why you weren't in bed either? You came to see this?"
"Y-Yeah," Milla responds perhaps a little too quickly, automatically glancing to the side. The lie tastes bitter on her tongue. "This…really is beautiful." At least that much is true.
"Yeah, it is! But actually, I think it was better back when me and Daddy…"
Elle doesn't finish the thought, voice trailing off as she finds interest in her own shoes again. Milla, in an attempt to get them off the sensitive topic of Elle's MIA father, blurts out the first thing that comes to mind.
"You shouldn't have just run off." It comes out a hint chiding before Milla can stop it, but hey, anything to distract Elle. "It's dark, and it's dangerous for you to be out here by yourself. Ludger would be worried sick."
"Oh…yeah. He would." Elle seems a bit sheepish at that, but it apparently gets her mind off her father, because she glances back up at Milla. "Then, could you not tell him I came out here? He won't worry if he doesn't know, and I promise I won't run off anymore."
Well it's not like Milla will be telling Ludger anything any time soon. "Sure. He doesn't need to know about this."
Milla swallows hard, mind racing desperately in search of a course of action. This is a major kink in her plans and she has to get rid of Elle fast so she can get out of here before anyone else comes looking for her. "Elle, you should go back to the inn now, okay?"
Elle tilts her head to the side, as if contemplating the idea, before finally nodding. "Okay," she chimes—and marches straight up to Milla to grab her hand with both her own and start tugging on it. "Let's go then."
Milla stammers. "Ah, I just…you go on ahead. I'll be back later." The bitter taste is so strong Milla wants to barf.
Elle blinks innocently back at her. "But you said it's dangerous for me to be by myself, right?" Milla curses her own big mouth as the girl insistently squeezes Milla's hand in both of her own. "So we should go back together."
There's something about the way Elle looks at her then, eyes twinkling in the light, lips curled into a wide and toothy smile, that sends an almost painful flutter through Milla's chest.
Milla loves that smile. Milla is sure that there is nothing in the entire prime dimension that she will ever love more than that smile. But if she runs now, she won't have that anymore.
If she runs now, what will she have?
"…Okay," Milla murmurs finally, hating herself for it even as she gives a returning squeeze to Elle's hand and lets the other cheerily drag her along. "Okay, we're going back."
(No matter how much Milla thinks of running, she never actually does.)