A/N: This is my way of defining how I think Muraki really feels about the people who are most important to him (as Morwen could tell you, I enjoy making theories on the relationships of fictional characters). It's also out of frustration, because fan fic authors pair Muraki up with just about anyone and everyone. This being Muraki, nothing is really black and white.
Disclaimer: Don't own YnM.
Four Loves
Tsuzuki: My Sweet Revenge
Such lovely eyes. Eyes like jewels. Eyes that fill with conflicting emotions when I make advances. Eyes in which I have seen pain, hate, disgust, despair, loneliness, emptiness, fear, anticipation, confusion, desire... all so beautifully set off by sparkling amethysts. I love that. I love how the smallest things set you off so easily. I can control you, and I know just what to say to get the reaction I want. You're so reactionary, Tsuzuki. So easy to rip apart. That is your weakness.
But do you know what I love most about you? Because it is with you that I will be able to finally achieve that for which I have lived these past sixteen years. Through you, I will have my revenge. Awfully cliché, perhaps. But you know how I feel, don't you, Tsuzuki? What else besides hate could have driven you so far into insanity? That what makes us so similar.
I'm just like you, Tsuzuki. Just. Like. You.
Hisoka: My Beautiful Doll
You hate being beautiful. You know that it was your beauty that made me want to tear your soul into shreds, to utterly crush and destroy your spirit. It was your beauty that made your death so drawn out. Your beauty was your downfall.
So delicate. Soft to the touch and sweet to taste. You pretend that hate is all you feel for me. But I know better. You're afraid of me. Terrified. How does that one quote go again? "Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering." That fits you entirely. Fear is such a vulnerable emotion. So, as human natures has us do so often, you turn it into anger. Much more defensive. "Stronger", correct? Anger is your reaction to everything.
You know you belong to me, don't you? You feel it deep inside you. And yet you fight it still. Strong-willed. Beautiful. The perfect doll.
My doll.
Oriya: My One True Friend
Do you remember when I saved your life? That snowy day when you tried to walk off the roof of my father's hospital, tried to end it all because you would never be worthy in the eyes of your family? You believed that I was an angel then. You know better now.
For no reason I can find, you've stood by me all this time. Even when you found out that I was a murderer. Even when you found the bloody yukata that I had taken from bouya. Even when you discovered that I was not the angel you'd believed I was for so long. You give me a place to stay. Food, shelter, protection, (my bloody clothes washed with no questions asked)... and you've never once turned me away.
We were lovers once. For four years. Then came Ukyou. You were never bitter about this new romance. In fact, you insisted that I choose Ukyou over you, said that she brought out the better part of me. I was so surprised.
I don't quite understand you to this day.
Ukyou: My Beloved
I'm still trying to figure out exactly what it was about you that drew me to you so strongly. You're no great beauty, nor were you a brilliant student. Plain, simple, very average, with a salaryman father and a stay-at-home mother.
We met in a bookstore. Remember? Oriya slipped on a wet patch of the terrazzo floor. His books went flying, and his look of surprise was priceless. Most of the other shoppers looked away in embarrassment. I smiled. You? You burst into hysterical laughter, and immediately began to help him gather his books. You've always been like that: full of laughter, and not afraid to show it. Now, when nothing seems to matter anymore, you are one of two people who can make me feel real emotion. And I love you for it.
A/N: Done! I know that the first two paragraphs seem to be from a whole different fan fic. That's sort of on purpose. It illustrates Muraki's almost split personality. Please review. Oh, the things mentioned in the Oriya part are going to be explained more thoroughly in another fan fic.