Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else
xxxx
Brooke Davis, how do I even begin to describe her? She's beautiful, and absolutely nobody can deny that unless they are blind or just jealous of her. Her eyes are the most vivid shade of hazel, always full of life and strength. Her dimples are contagious and she looks like she just stepped out of a fashion magazine.
She pretty much runs Tree Hill High. She's the queen bee and everyone else are her little bitches, that come at her beck and call. They pretty much all worship the very ground that she walks on. Every guy dreams of being with her and every girl either loves her and wants nothing more than for her to simply just talk to them or hates her. Secretly, they just envy her and wish that they were her.
She has the seemingly perfect life, the big house in which she throws the best parties, the filthy rich parents, the fancy sports car, and the latest clothes. But, I know that Brooke Davis does not have a perfect life. It's far from it actually. Her parents throw money at her and send her on her way when in reality she wants nothing more than for them to love her. She won't admit it though. She's too stubborn.
You're probably wondering how I know all of this? Well it's because Brooke Davis is my best friend and secretly I'm one of the many guys that is in love with her but she doesn't know. She sees me as her best friend and nothing more because she dates my asshole of a half-brother, although I normally don't claim him, Lucas Scott. Lucas is the resident asshole that everyone hates. He is a major burnout in my opinion and he's probably fried every one of his brain cells from smoking too much weed but I guess that's why Brooke is with him. Because they are a lot alike in that way.
Brooke has some problems, ones that are not easily noticeable to others but are quite noticeable to me. She likes to drink, a little bit too much and she drinks for all the wrong reasons. It started out because she wanted to be cool and she wanted to have fun but eventually it turned into an escape route. It was her way of numbing any pain. It was her way of ignoring the fact that Lucas treats her like she's scum on the bottom of his shoe. It was her way of ignoring life.
I can't even count the number of times that I've driven to a party or a bar to pick up a drunken Brooke. I can't even count how many times that I've spent the night with her because she was so drunk that I was afraid of leaving her alone. I can't even count the number of nights that I've told her I loved her as more than a friend but she was too drunk to remember it in the morning and I can't even count the number of times that she's been so drunk that she has no recollection of the night before and ended up either in a strangers bed or passed out god knows where.
It's sad really and most people wonder why I waste my time but the truth is that I feel the need to save her. I feel like I'm her guardian angel, the only one watching over her and if I don't save her, then nobody else will.
I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I've had you so many times but somehow
I want more
xxxx
I was driving, no specific destination in mind. I was upset because my father had yet again belittled and manipulated me.
Flashback
"Hey son," my father Dan Scott smiles up at me. The smile on his face is evil and I know that he is scheming something. Dan Scott is the Mayor of Tree Hill, the biggest asshole in Tree Hill, and he is also my father.
"What do you want Dan?" I grumbled as I walk up the stairs to lock myself in my bedroom and hopefully avoid the wrath that Dan is about to give me.
I can hear him following after me, his heavy footsteps thumping against the floor. I know there's no point in locking my door because I will have to face him anyways. I throw myself down on my bed and pick my basketball up and throw it at the net that's on my wall. It hits the rim, bounces off, and lands right in the feet of my smirking father.
"You should be practicing Nathan. Then maybe you won't miss easy shots like that," he laughs as he tosses the ball at the basket and watches it swish in with an arrogant smirk on his face.
"The first game of the play offs is coming up Nate, you need to get practicing. I don't want to see you make simple mistakes like that," he barks, gesturing towards the basket I had missed.
"Why do you give a fuck dad? You don't care about me, you just want me to lead my team to victory because you couldn't do it yourself. You just want me to live out the dream you never got. Well guess what dad? Fuck you!" I get up to leave but he blocks the door and I know that fighting him will only make the matter worse.
"You're right Nathan I do want you to live out the dream I never had. I want what is best for you son and that is why I want to watch you succeed and do the things that I wasn't able to get a chance to do," he says softly, his voice almost sounding genuine. Almost. But Dan Scott is never genuine and I can see right through his little charade.
I stand with my arms stubbornly folded across my chest, not saying a word as Dan rants on and on about how important the proper training is and that I need to start putting some effort in. My mind just seems to be elsewhere. "Nathan, are you even listening to me?" he demands, as he notices the blank stare on my face.
"Yes dad I'm listening to you," I grumbled, unamused by his stupid antics.
"Anyways like I said, you need to hit the gym at least 5 times a week for no less than 2 hours each session and you need to go for a morning jog for at least a good hour every morning. And I also want to see you outside shooting hoops or at least practicing at school whenever you get a chance," he insisted as he barked out his orders. "Is that clear?"
"Crystal clear," I mutter sarcastically as I push by him and out the door. "Where do you think you're going?"
I turn and glare at him, "Is that really any of your business?"
"You're my son of course it's my business," he retorts with a spiteful smirk.
"I'm going out," I reply flatly as I start to head down the stairs but he follows after me of course.
"Don't you think you should be practicing right now? Or at least going to the gym?"
"My life does not revolve around basketball!"
"Well it should. It will only make you a better player. Do you think NBA players spend all their time going out?"
"Why is it always me huh? What about Lucas, your other son? Why don't you push him like you push me?
"Because first of all we know that Lucas does not have your talent, I mean yes if he pulled his head out of his ass he would be a half decent player but he's no superstar. He doesn't have the talent, the potential, or the drive that you do Nathan. Besides look at him," Dan laughs. "He's fried every fucking brain cell he has. Lucas is a deadbeat loser that is going to go nowhere in life but you have a future and I want to help you secure it."
"You can't run my life dad. If I want to have my future secured I will do it myself but I don't need you telling me how to do it," I bit back harshly, the bitterness dripping off my tongue. I take one last look at him and how pathetic he is before heading out the door, slamming it shut as I walk off towards my car.
"I guess you'll end up like your brother then. Deadbeat and going nowhere in life," Dan yells after me as I wave my middle finger up in the air, "Fuck you Dan."
I can hear him chuckling as I get into my car. I just want to get out of here as fast as I can and let the road take me wherever I end up.
END FLASHBACK
It's raining now. Thick drops of rain pelt the windshield at a rapid pace as I keep on driving, angry and pissed off. I need to pull over, I just know it. The thunder roars and bolts of lightning crack in the sky, lighting up the darkness of the world around me. I need to pull over, the rain is become increasingly worse as it plagues my vision and causes my car to swerve in certain places. I'm not far from her house so maybe I could just go there. Somehow my destination is always her house, no matter what it always brings me there.
As I turn the corner, I can see the large white house with the red door and the black shutters. There is only one car parked in the driveway and it's hers. Her parents must be away and I know how much Brooke Davis hates thunderstorms. I look down at my cellphone and see 5 missed calls from Brooke. Shit, she must be scared. I had to get in there like now. I park my car and open the door just a crack before running across the lawn full tilt. I almost slip on the wet grass and I am hugging my dripping wet body, thanks to the fact that when I left I wasn't dressed ideally for rain. I reach for the doorknob, not even bothering to knock and when I twist it, I discover that it is locked. I reach for the key that is hidden under a flowerpot and unlock the door myself. The power must be out because all of the lights are off and the house is completely surrounded by darkness.
"Brooke!" I yell loudly as I walk through the house, my footsteps echoing throughout the empty house. "It's me Nathan!"
"Nathan?" Her voice is barely above a whisper and it's coming from the living room. I turn the corner just to see her curled up on the couch in a little tiny ball, flipping through a fashion magazine. Another flash of lightning cracks, followed by the vicious roar of thunder and she winces. The only light is coming from the candle that is flickering on the coffee table and from the flashlight that she holds up in attempt to read her magazine.
"Nathan you're soaked," she whispers as she stands up and examines my dripping wet body. "Where's your coat?"
"It wasn't raining when I left my house," I shrug causally and she laughs.
"Let me get you some dry clothes," she offers and she disappears before I can even reply.
She comes back a few moments later with a pair of sweatpants, which I'm guessing are her fathers and an old Keith Scott auto body hoody, which I had given to her because she loved it so much. "I put your clothes in the dryer," she smiles but the sound of thunder makes her flinch and I can see how scared she is even though she's putting on a brave face. Brooke Davis does that a lot.
"Thanks," I nod as I step closer to her and wrap my arms around her tiny frame. "It's going to be okay Brooke," I assure her as I rub soothing circles on her back in attempt to comfort her. I can't help but notice how perfectly her body fits against mine. A yawn elicits from her mouth and let out a small chuckle. "Let's get you to bed sleepy head."
She nods her head even though we both know she won't sleep until the thunder subsides. She is already dressed in her pajamas so all I have to do is tuck her in. I pull the covers up over her body and give her a small kiss on the forehead. "I love you bestie," I smile as I look at her perfectly angelic face, which is barely illuminated by the moonlight.
"I love you too Nathan," she smiles back and she doesn't know how badly I wish those words were true in a non friendship sort of way.
I turn to leave but she whispers something that stops me. "Will you stay with me?"
I can't say no to Brooke Davis, there's absolutely no way. "Of course I will."
I pull the hoody off, revealing my perfect set of toned abs and slide in beside her, the warm of her body driving me crazy. She cuddles up beside me, her body curled up against mine and instinctively I wrap my arms around her. I wish this was how I could go to sleep every night.
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved
xxxx
It's some time around 3 AM when the lightning and thunder picks up again, jolting both of us awake. Brooke screams and sits upright in bed, fear overtaking her body.
"Brooke," I whisper as she slowly sinks back down under the covers.
"Sorry Nathan. You probably think I'm the world's biggest baby right now," she laughs slightly and I shake my head.
"I think it's kind of cute," I smirk, pulling her closer to me.
"So you think I'm cute?" she questions with a joking smile on her face.
As if on cue the thunder roars again, sending Brooke into quiet mode as she buries her head into my chest. I wrap my arms tightly around her body and whisper words of condolence in her ear as I try to calm her down.
After about an hour the thunder stops rumbling and Brooke finally starts to relax. She is lying with her head on my chest, drawing circles on my stomach with her perfectly manicured fingertips.
"I love Lucas but I want something more," she suddenly blurts out and I look at her confused.
"What?"
"I just don't feel anything with him anymore. He's not the same guy I fell in love with."
"Are you going to break up with him?" I ask curiously as I was silently praying that she would say yes.
Slowly she nods her head, "I think so I just don't know how to do it."
Taking a shaky breath, I lean in and kiss her with everything that I have and strangely she doesn't pull away or slap me like I expected. She reciprocates the kiss and when I beg for entrance she gladly allows it. I slowly shift my weight so that I am lying on top of her, her hands tangled up in my hair.
Slowly, I break the kiss off, "What are we doing?" I suddenly question, because I know that this is wrong.
"I need to feel something," she whispers as she attaches her lips back onto mine. "Please Nathan? Just for tonight?"
I know that I can never say no to Brooke Davis so I nod my head as I lean back down and kiss her with as much hunger and passion as I have wanted to for such a long time now. I know that is means nothing to her but to me it means more than she will ever know.
Sunlight is slowly seeping in through the window, illuminating the room and I can see the beautiful brunette sleeping next to me. Our sweaty bodies are tangled together in a mass of sheets and she is sleeping so peacefully. Her chest rises up and down rhythmically with every deep breath she takes and a content smile is spread across her gorgeous face. Her head is rested perfectly in the crook of my neck and I can't explain how giddy I feel that we are this close. Last night was amazing and although I know it will probably never happen again, it was the greatest night of my life. I lean over and place a small kiss on her lips before getting up and heading towards the bathroom. The steaming hot water feels good against my skin as I cleanse myself. I start thinking about last night and wishing that I could relive it, that I could do it all over again, that I could feel her body moving in sync with mine again, that I could feel her body grinding against mine for just one more time.
As I step out of the shower, I wrap a towel around myself and I make my way into Brooke's bedroom. She is sitting up in bed now and she offers me a small smile.
"Brooke…" I smile as I sit next to her and cradle her soft cheek in my hand. "We need to talk about last night."
She nods her head, "I'm sorry Nathan, and I don't know what came over me. I just needed to feel something. I was hoping that I could and I'm sorry that I did that because it was wrong."
"It's okay," I offer her a smile. "Best friends?"
"Best friends forever," she corrects me, cracking a smile.
Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn't matter anymore
It's not always rainbows and butterflies
It's compromise that moves us along, yeah
My heart is full and my door's always open
You can come anytime you want
xxxx
As I sprawled across my bed, reading a sports magazine, my mind kept drifting back to the night we'd slept together. It had been about a week now. I was always trying to play this stupid hero complex with Brooke but I was getting sick of the way it always played out. I was always left wanting more and she was always there to break my heart. I thought about our friendship and the many memories that we'd had as kids. One in particular stuck out to me of when we were just 15 years old. That night reminded me of the first time we'd ever slept together…
FLASHBACK
"Nathan!" I would recognize that voice anywhere. Her tiny fist was pounding against my window and since only one person ever entered through that window I didn't have to think twice to know who it was. I went over and slid the window open as the tiny brunette climbed in. I noticed the tears that had gathered in her eyes and I wrapped my arms around her as she sobbed, her body shaking with ever tremor. "What happened?" I ask once she pulled away.
She grabs my hand leads me over to the bed, where we sit side by side. "My parents got in another fight. It was bad," she whispers. "Mom accused my dad of cheating on her and he didn't deny it," Brooke laughed bitterly. "Their lives are so fucking screwed up."
"Was it violent?"
She nods her head, "Lots of broken glass. A bunch of words that even I couldn't decipher and a few punches that mom had delivered to dad's face."
"Wow," I mumble as she flops back on my bed.
"I don't want to go back there."
"I don't blame you. Stay the night," I offer with a wide smile.
"Okay," she nods as she shrugs her pants off and slips under the covers in just her underwear and a tank top.
I slip in next to her, clad in just my boxers and a comfortable silence surrounds us.
"So…" I whisper as I stare at her pretty face. "I heard about you and Lucas."
"We're not dating," she shrugs. "He keeps trying to sleep with me but I'm scared because I'm a virgin and I don't want to screw it up."
"I wish I wasn't a virgin," she whispers and I turn to her.
"Brooke, don't be ashamed. You're the most popular girl in school but you still don't feel the need to give it up. I think that's awesome. I wish I could go back and erase my first time."
Brooke snorts, "Well no shit. Taylor James was you're first. Can anyone say whore much?"
I let out a small chuckle, "Well yeah but I was too young and I should've waited."
"Nathan will you be my first?" she asks and my eyes widen with shock. Brooke Davis wanted me to sleep with me. Every guy only dreamed of sleeping with her and now I was getting the chance but unfortunately I had to turn her down.
"Brooke…"
"Please Nathan. You're my best friend and I trust you. I'm too nervous to lose my virginity to someone that I don't trust. Please?" she begs, giving me that pout that I know I can't resist.
"What about our friendship? Won't it be awkward?"
"No we're young and we're not in love or anything so it won't be awkward," she shakes her head and I can see the desperation in her eyes. She wants this so bad and who am I to turn her down?
"Alright, I'll help you out but only because you're my Brookie," I grin, reaching into my bedside drawer for a condom.
END FLASHBACK
I don't mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
xxxx
As I pull out of the flashback I smile at the memory. The way her body felt against mine was right. It's too bad that she couldn't see that. I think about another memory of Brooke and I that stands out. It happened a few months ago when she and Lucas were on a small hiatus and she was drunk. It was one of the first times that I noticed she was becoming an alcoholic, courtesy of my jackass brother.
FLASHBACK
"NATHAN!" a drunken voice slurred as I was having a conversation with Skills. I excused myself from the conversation and turned around to find a very drunken Brooke standing next to me with a red cup in her hand. She was dressed very promiscuously and she looked angry. Nonetheless she looked beautiful.
"You're brothers an ass," she grumbles as she lifts the cup to her lips and chugs, wiping the stray liquid from her mouth.
"What did he do now?"
"He fucked Peyton Sawyer that's what he did," she answers bitterly.
"Peyton as in my ex-girlfriend Peyton?"
Brooke chuckles, "yeah the only Peyton you know doofus."
"Holy fuck, how do you know?"
She lets out a bitter laugh, "Because I saw it."
"I walked in on them about 10 minutes ago and I haven't stopped drinking since…"
"BROOKE!" a voice calls and as if on cue my blonde brother comes running towards us. Great, just great.
"What do you want asshole?" she hisses, turning to me for support.
"I'm sorry. What you just saw it meant nothing to me. I love you pretty girl and I'm so sorry. I wish you didn't have to see it and I wish I hadn't done it but…"
She puts her hand up for him to stop. "I don't give a shit Lucas. We're on a break anyways so you can fuck whoever you want and I'll fuck whoever I want," she smirks, grabbing onto the side of my face and crashing her lips onto mine. After a good 30 seconds she pulls away and smirks at him.
Lucas lets out a laugh, "Aw that's so cute babe, trying to make me jealous by kissing my brother, who is also your best friend."
"Actually Nathan and I are friends with benefits not just friends. We have been for a while I just didn't know how to tell you," she smiles, lacing her fingers with mine and I decide to go along with it.
"Yeah so you can go back to Peyton and fuck her because I'm with Brooke in case you haven't noticed. At least someone knows how to treat her right."
"You little…"
"Lucas just go," Brooke insists, shoving him away from me.
Several hours later, after Brooke and I have acted like a couple, receiving many glares from Lucas in return, she's disappeared and I can't find her anywhere.
"Looking for your girl?" Lucas's annoying voice questions from behind me as he walks up and air quotes the your.
"Fuck off Lucas," I grumbled, turning my body away from him.
He smirks and points off in the direction of Brooke, "Oh, I think I found her."
Brooke is up dancing on a table and the crowd is cheering as she pulls her shirt off and whips it into the audience. A few guys get up there and start grinding against her. I can feel myself getting jealous so I hand my drink to Lucas and weave my way through the crowd.
"Shows over guys," I growl as I haul Brooke off the table and drag her out the door, receiving a lot of groans from those enjoying Brooke taking her clothes off.
"NATHAN! WHAT THE FUCK?" she screams as I throw into the passenger's seat and start the car up.
"You're fucking hammered Brooke. It's time to go home."
"But I didn't get to finish making Luke jealous," she whines.
"Yes you did. Believe me he was jealous."
As I pull into her driveway, I notice that her head is resting against the window pane and she looks about ready to pass out. I go over to the passenger side and lift her out of the car gently, cradling her in my arms. We make it inside and she kicks her shoes off, laughing as they fly up into the air. She stumbles up the stairs, hitting the railing as she attempts to walk and I can't help but laugh at her slightly. It is pretty funny how drunk she is.
When I make it up the stairs I notice that she's already laying on her bed, face down and still clad in the clothes she was wearing at the party, or lack of.
"Come on Brooke, let's get you to bed."
I attempt to move her over but she doesn't want to move. She just wants to lay there.
"Nathan I'm gonna puke!" she suddenly yells, jolting upright and bolting for the bathroom. I follow her and hold her hair up as she retches her guts out into the toilet. I rub her back soothingly as she starts to cry.
"What's wrong Brookie?" I ask quietly as she turns to me and buries her head against my chest.
"I'm such a fuck up," she answers shakily, every sob trembling her small body.
"No you're not Brooke. You're such an amazing person, so what if you had a bad night?"
"I'm fucking up my life. With Lucas and with the drinking and with the messing around with you, it's all fucking my life up."
"Look at me Brooke," I command, grabbing her face and pulling it towards me. "Brooke Davis you are the most beautiful and most talented person that I know. You are not a fuck up and one day you're going to great things. As for Lucas, he's the one at fault and I think he knows that."
"You think so?"
"I know so."
"I love you Nate. You're the best friend I've ever had," she whispers as I gather her in my arms." If only she knew how much those words meant to me and how much I wish they were real.
"I love you too Brookie. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me."
"You're always saving me Nate."
"Well someone has too right?" I chuckle as she settles into my arms.
END FLASHBACK
I know where you hide
Alone in your car
Know all of the things that make you who you are
I know that goodbye means nothing at all
Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls
xxxx
"I'm done. I'm so done with him!" she screams, rushing to my bedroom and I glance up at her.
"What happened now?"
"He's being an asshole saying that I'm not putting enough effort into our relationship. I can't believe he has the nerve to say that when he fucked Peyton not even 4 months ago. I've put everything I fucking have into this relationship and he just fucks everything up!" she rants as she paces the room.
"Brooke, it's okay," I assure her as I pull her into my arms.
"No Nathan, It's not okay. Everything is falling apart and I can't do a single thing about it," she cries, and I hate seeing her break down. It nearly kills me inside.
"Why the fuck do I love him so much?" I was wondering the same thing. Why the fuck do I love her so much when all she does is cause me pain?
"The heart has reasons that reason does not know," I tell her and she bursts out laughing.
"You're such a dork."
"You can't control who you love Brooke. I know exactly how that feels."
"What do you mean?"
This is it. I'm sick of hiding how I feel from her. I have to tell her before its too late.
"I'm in love with you Brooke Penelope Davis, I always have been and I probably always will be."
She looks at me with widened eyes and I can't tell what she is thinking. Finally she speaks. "Nathan…"
I shake my head, "let me finish." "I've watched you date my brother and I've watched him treat you like shit Brooke. I love you and I have since I was 13 years old. I can give you everything that Lucas can't. I can give you exactly what you need if you'd just let me."
"Nathan, I'm so sorry but I don't feel that way about you I just don't," she whispers. "You're my best friend and I love you for that but I'm not in love with you. I'm sorry."
"This won't change our friendship will it?" Brooke asks suddenly.
"I don't know Brooke. It's hard being in love with your best friend and knowing that you'll never get to be with them…"
"I have to go," she whispers, reaching over and giving me a small hug.
"Do you think we could ever you know?" I ask as she's halfway out the door.
"Maybe," she smiles before walking out but we both know that that's never going to happen. She will always go running back to Lucas and I will always be left knowing that I can never have Brooke Davis, that I will never be good enough for her. I will always be second best. I am Brooke's hero, I'm her guardian angel and no matter what she will always be loved. I, Nathan Scott will love Brooke Davis until the day die, regardless of whether she loves me back or not.
AN: This is my first shot at writing Brathan so I hope you guys like it! Song is She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5 and it makes me think of Brathan for some reason. I'm a Brucas fan but I have a soft spot for Nathan/Brooke and I wanted to give this a shot. Sorry if Lucas seems like an ass but it had to be that way for the story. Please review and let me know what you think!