A/N: The lyrics at the bottom are from Birds and Boats by Gregory and the Hawk.

Based upon a true story.


It was just one week. That was it. That was the only official times that we were going out.

I was actually still in a relationship before it happened. Oscar was his name, and although he wasn't the most popular guy in the world he was nice and caring. The only problem I had with him was his rather sexual feelings when he was alone. I think that was part of the reason I had that put me off him.

I met Sirius at a picnic on the last day of summer. I was with Oscar but Sirius came and sat next to me. I had to admit, I had kind of liked Sirius ever since my sister introduced me to him. She liked him back then, and I had to agree with her taste. Despite this, I barely knew him and I knew for a fact that there were many people who liked him so I figured I wouldn't stand a chance, particularly from one time we met and I dropped an ice lolly down his back. Good times, good times.

Anyway, Sirius happened to sit next to me and we began to talk. My brother was there at the time and they sort of bonded – my brother can be very sweet to my friends. We chatted quite a bit and when it was time to go he promised he would send an email or an owl. To be honest, I was quite impressed he knew about emails, considering he was pureblood and all that.

I got home and opened up my email account and sure enough I had one new email from Sirius. I opened it happily and read it, though not with the enthusiasm that was to come later.

I emailed him back and so the chatting went on. I don't know how it happened but we eventually became really good friends, and when we went back to school he started talking in person. He was very sweet and charming, and I thought it was truly amazing. By now I was beginning to decide I was definitely having second thoughts on my relationship with poor Oscar, as it was not just the sexual problems that were becoming a difficulty. I felt very guilty about it and thought that it was decidedly unfair if I continued like this.

This idea became definite when Sirius asked me who I liked. He was, of course, being rather nosy about this, though I couldn't help but be slightly amused. I told him that I wouldn't tell him until he told me, and though he was somewhat peeved about this he obliged, and told me that his top people he liked were this popular girl called Louise, an extremely pretty girl called Millie and coincidently, me.

Although I felt very guilty I also felt rather pleased. I remember grinning forever all the way through the class that followed. When we came out for lunch I admitted to him that he was also on my list and he seemed quite happy, which made me happy. It sounded as though he really liked me, and he confirmed this when we were sending owls to each other late into the night, much to annoyance of the rest of my dorm.

I was in Ravenclaw and he was in Gryffindor so it was rather hard to talk to each other, though we did as much as possible. I looked forward to every lunchtime when I got to see him and luckily we had a few lessons where we were actually together. The only problem we had was Oscar, though he gently helped me get over that hurdle.

Oscar was in Hufflepuff, so I wasn't seeing as much of him as I did previously, when we attended some sort of club together. I really liked him but I was starting to feel uncomfortable with him and at the same time Sirius was being more and more charming. So I decided to break up with him, and told my friends this so to get some advice.

It was hard but I did it, though you can't imagine how guilty I felt afterwards. It was unbelievable, and Sirius helped me get through it and we became even closer. He sent me an owl asking how long he should wait before he asked someone out who has just broken up with someone and you can not believe how warm I was inside. I still sent regular owls to Oscar apologising and so on, but I knew that I soon was going to do the worst and start date Sirius so soon after breaking up with Oscar.

I honestly felt like a slut, but I knew that if Sirius did ask me out I would say yes. Hogsmeade weekend was coming up and he told me that he was going ask me to go.

He asked me out on the Friday before Hogsmeade, exactly four days after I had broken up with Oscar. He asked me right in front of my best friend and of course I said yes, because by this time I was absolutely smitten. I could not believe it. He was completely the dream boy – good-looking, funny, popular and with a nice personality. I thought my life was great.

And so the week began.

Saturday. This was the one day on which I didn't see him. I got special permission from Dumbledore to visit my grandmother, who was recovering from a sickness that she had been struck down with in the previous week. Nevertheless Sirius and I kept in contact – I had never had my head in a fireplace for as long as I did that night.

Sunday. Hogsmeade was amazing, despite my friends attempting to stalk me all the way through. Unluckily I also bumped into Oscar, who caused a somewhat awkward silence, but despite all this the date was amazing. It may seem rushed but it was during this date I first kissed him. It was soft and sweet, and his hands were simply careful around my waist rather than rushing straight to my breasts. I had never been love struck so early on in the date and it really felt like magic, pun not intended. We returned to Hogwarts grinning, hand in hand, and our friends guessed immediately what we had been up to. Not that we cared. I was just so happy.

Monday. Luckily enough Sirius sat next to me in Transfiguration, though for some reason or another he didn't hold hands with me. I didn't mind much though – the reason was because we were doing a lot of writing in this lesson so it was to be expected. When it came to break and lunch we were inseparable, and our friends claimed our hands were stuck together. Every time I looked at him I could not believe the luck I had from being with him. I considered myself the luckiest girl in the world, and I decided that I had to make sure I didn't lose him because as I wasn't pretty as others he could easily be destracted, although he didn't seem that he was going to turn that way. That evening we went our separate ways – me off to Ravenclaw and him Gryffindor, but we tried to keep in touch as much as possible. He even sent Peter with little notes to me and I couldn't help but feel just so awed and my insides felt warm with happiness.

Tuesday. We decided upon meeting up after the classes finished, and so I spent to entire day beaming and telling anyone who would listen how happy I was. I held hands with him as much as was possible and everyone kept commenting upon how we were the perfect couple. Every single time he left me he kissed me on the lips and told me he loved me, and I would just blush in reply. I had never been very good at the romance melarky. When he was gone I would almost daydream about him, and a girl in my class called Fiona told me that I was just so sweet. When lessons finally ended we met up and walked around the grounds for ages. We found a private place and he just held me, telling me that I was amazing whilst I talked happily. We would argue – never in a serious way, just about little things that I found amusing and teased him about, which he always ended up tickling me for after. We kissed for the second time and when we finally got back it was dark and we were lucky not to be caught by McGonagall.

Wednesday. I spent a lot of time chatting with my sister, who was going out with Lupin, one of Sirius' friends. According to Lupin Sirius was head-over-heels in love with me, and was always talking about me. I just couldn't believe it. Sirius was the best-looking guy I knew – in fact, he was perfect. It was unbelievable that he liked me, of all people. He proved this fact when he began to just hold me in front of everyone, and when anyone came near he just whispered 'Mine.' After lessons we both went to this Quidditch club that someone had set up for those who weren't in the team – we both went and it was incredible, though I felt almost self-conscious all the way through because although Sirius was very good, I was somewhat terrible. He told me that he thought I was amazing afterwards though which made me smile.

Thursday. We had the afternoon off, and it was the best weather in weeks. We all went down by the lake and messed about there, in tee-shirts despite it being September, playing catch and so on. Someone made a massive rope-swing that swung over the lake and we had great fun on that. Sirius led me off on a romantic sunset walk along the lake side which was simply fantastic. We walked along the path that ran along the edge whilst I chattered the whole time about this and that, teasing him about his amount of money and posh accent and so on, and we had play-fights that always ended up with a kiss. He held me for ages and often tried to kiss me, though I unfortunately kept pulling back because my hair was in the way. He was put out by this so I made sure I gave him a super long kiss afterwards. It was the best afternoon in a long time and I felt that we were absolutely smitten for each other.

Friday. In rained, a lot. For some reason we spent our lunchtime outside and it tipped itself down constantly. We ignored this anyway and our hands were glued to each other's the entire time. He kissed me in public because he left early with a friend and I remember feeling really empty inside, and my hand felt cold. I decided that I was having the best life ever when I was in a relationship with him. I was just so happy. I spent as long as possible with him, but as the evening began to come an end he started to be more distant, and his replies were ever so short. I thought it was simply because he was tired – he got up to a lot of activities with them marauders – so I decided to ignore it, continuing to attempt to make conversation, though I was a little despondent when I returned to my common room.

But then the problems started. As I laid in my bed, I received a letter saying 'my life is just so fucked up. I hate it.' from Sirius. To say I was a little worried was a pretty serious understatement, but I sent one back anyway, saying 'why?' with an unhappy face.

The reply I got made me freeze to the spot and my face turn white. I made a little choked noise, and just stared at the letter for ages. I was so upset I couldn't cry.

"I thought I loved you, but I've just realised I don't. I actually like this other girl more. I'm sorry, but it's better you know now before our relationship got too serious.'

I breathed deeply in and out and scribbled down: 'Oh. Right. Well. Who?' and pleaded quietly to myself that he was kidding. His reply didn't cooperate with my plea.

'I can't tell you. I don't want it to spread around. I'm sorry. I really am. But this is got to end; it's not fair for you. Again I'm sorry.' I couldn't breathe. My eyes stung, as though tears wanted to break through but they simply couldn't. I just wasn't taking in the letter. His kisses, him holding my hand, it was all going to end.

Anger ripped through me and I just wanted to let it out. The fucking bastard. The fucking fucking bastard. He was the fucking reason I broke up with Oscar. He charmed me and made me like him so much. He held my hand everywhere, and told me he loved me, and told me he didn't want the relationship ever to end. We had romantic walks together, we kissed in public, he was so sweet and nice and I told him I felt empty when he was gone. He made sure he was doing the right thing and he said he loved me all the time.

He was the best boyfriend I've had and I thought our relationship was gonna be the longest. Well fuck that. He dumped me with no warning, told me that he liked someone else better than me and wouldn't even fucking tell me who. I ached inside and he still won't tell me.

I realised I was crying now, angry frustrated tears that came down hot through the crinkles in my face, as I screwed it up trying to dispel his memory from my mine. Why wouldn't he tell me who he likes better than me? It made it so much worse. The idea of someone out there that had his love, even if they never showed their love back, was horrible. I showed all that love, all that affection, and it meant nothing.

I remember saying that very day I've always wanted to be a penguin and he said I'd make a very cute one. I grinned and explained that my hair was a pain because it was so long. He told me that my hair was beautiful and in future he'll hold my hair when he kissed me. He told me that he couldn't wait to see me again and that I meant the world to him.

All lies.

It was the best week I'd had in a long time, and he made it that way. I still love him but I can't look at him anymore. Every time I thought of him the tears fell thick and fast, and that night I could do nothing more than slowly I cry myself to sleep.

I will never forget him.

If you be my star, I'll be your sky,

You can hide underneath me and come out at night.

When I turn jet black, and you show off your light,

I live to let you shine,

I live to let you shine.

But you can skyrocket away from me,

And never come back if you

Find another galaxy

Far, from here

With more room to fly

Just leave me your stardust to remember you by.

Stardust, to remember you by.