A/N: Okay, so ladygris comes to me and says we should start a new challenge. Every submission must begin AND end with the phrase, "It was a dark and stormy night…" and be between 500 and 1000 words. According to MS Word, this comes in at exactly 1000 words without the note and title. We look forward to reading the works of those brave enough to begin and end a story with a cliché.

Enjoy!

~Sandy

Dark and Stormy Night Challenge

Rodney

"It was a dark and stormy night…I know that sounds like a cliché but it's true. The rain was coming down so hard that night I couldn't see more than a few feet in front of the car. Umbrellas and raincoats were useless against the onslaught. The only way to stay dry was to remain indoors but I was one of the few stupid enough to be out in this weather. It couldn't be helped though.

"I turned the radio up to try to drown out the sound of it slamming against the roof of the car but that just made my ears hurt so I shut it off and cranked up the heat. The tank was near full so that wasn't a problem.

"No other cars were on the road and…"

"What the hell, Rodney. That is the corniest opening line to a story I've ever heard." John tossed a kernel of popcorn at his friend.

Teyla scowled at John and put a hand on Rodney's arm. "Please, Rodney, continue with your story."

The physicist crossed his arms and looked stubborn. "Not if he's gonna criticize."

John opened his mouth though he didn't say a word when Ronon's hand came down on his shoulder. "Quiet."

"Thanks, Conan. Now, where was I?"

"No other cars were on the road…" Teyla prompted, smiling gently.

"Oh, yeah…well no other cars were on the road. Or so I thought. I'd just come around a hairpin turn when I saw headlights up ahead coming down my side of the road. I flashed my lights but the driver kept coming."

Rodney stopped to take a drink of beer, his fourth in less than two hours, and toss back a handful of popcorn. He took his time chewing and took another drink.

"Rodney!"

"Okay, okay. Um…I swerved at the last second, the tires on the driver's side skidding in the mud off the edge of the pavement on the opposite side. But with split-second timing and incredible skill, I was able to get back on the road and continued on my way."

Scooting he chair away from Ronon, John grabbed another handful of popcorn. "Oh, yeah. That's really scary. Can't you just cut to the part where someone gets killed or maimed or even just slightly annoyed?"

"No. The end loses its impact if you skip ahead."

Lorne adjusted his position and took a drink from his beer bottle. "Go ahead, doc. I'm listening even if no one else is."

Teyla leapt to the defense of her friends. "We're listening, Evan. Please, Rodney. Continue."

"Well, I kept going down this little go-nowhere road until there in front of me stood a figure all in black. It waved its arms signaling for me to stop. When I got close, I saw that it had no face. I hit the gas and zoomed past it through a huge puddle. A wall of water went up and over, completely covering it. When I looked back, it was gone as if it had melted."

John scoffed. "Like the Wicked Witch of the West?"

"Yes, like the Wicked Witch of the West." Rodney took another drink of his beer making a "hmm" sound when he realized the bottle was empty. "I, uh, finally made it back to the highway. By then the rain had slackened off some and I was able to make it to my destination. It had taken me more than two hours, I'd almost rolled my car, the one I'd just finished paying for, by the way, and was nearly attacked by a who-knows-what. I'd survived but didn't know that the night would end with my being severely injured." His left hand rubbed his right bicep in remembrance of the night.

Now the Athosian was worried about her friend. If the injury still bothered him, it had to have been bad. "How old were you again?"

"It was the summer I turned nineteen. Jeannie was eleven, almost twelve." Still rubbing his arm, he continued. "I pulled up in front and before I could do anything, the passenger door opened and there was a sudden sharp, stabbing pain in my right bicep."

Teyla's eyes were wide with fear for Rodney. "What happened? Was the person who hurt you caught?"

"Yeah, mom sent her to bed without supper. Which was better than what happened to me."

"Wait! Jeannie hit you?" John was incredulous. I expected a real horror story and all that happened was Rodney had been hit by his sister? This sucks!

"Yeah. She was small for her age but really strong. Probably from the video games she played morning, noon and night." Rodney looked around at the faces of his friends. "What? She hit me really hard. I had a bruise for two weeks."

Sharing an eye roll with the others, Teyla injected as much sympathy as possible into her next question. "What happened to you? Aside from the bruise."

Rodney turned his head and mumbled. When he looked back at his friends they were watching and waiting for him to continue. "I was grounded. There! Are you happy? Oh, yes, I can see and hear that you are." He scowled as the others laughed.

John almost fell out of his chair, just managing to catch himself on the edge of the table. "You were in college and you mother grounded you?"

"Her house, her rules." He could see that his attempts at explaining were not going over very well. "Okay, you've had your laugh. Who's next? Teyla?"

She shook her head. "I do not have a comparable tale to tell. None of mine are as scary as…" she snickered, "…your mother grounding you."

"Well, I did forget my little sister at the mall for six hours while I went to the university library."

John finally stopped laughing though he still smirked. "Go ahead, Teyla. Tell us your scary story."

Flicking her eyes at Rodney, she began to speak. "It was a dark and stormy night on Athos…"