Secret
He's sitting on the ground and something inside him is singing.
He closes his eyes, content to sit in peace on the bare ground. This is one of the only times he can be outside without disapproving looks and he treasures it. The feeling of being content, maybe even happy, surges through him as strong as it can only be on these days.
These days are to be treasured. He learnt that early on. And unlike the other children, there's no parent or sibling to stop him from enjoying it.
He knows the looks he gets. He knows that what he is doing is weird and abnormal, but he thinks it's fitting for a freak like him. That's what they call him, freak. He tastes the word as he speaks it again and again, giggling a bit at how weird it sounds repeated like that. It's not his name, he thinks. But it belongs to him in much the same way.
It's why it doesn't matter what he does. He can do this without anything changing. And no one is ever here to see.
He looks up into the dark sky as he feels the rain touch his naked body. Drops run down his face as if he is crying, but he's not. He's happy. He almost can't contain the desire to express it in a sound he's not even sure that he can make. That sound isn't his, but he hears it inside.
He laughs and giggles and cheers, falling onto his back with a smile on his face.
He feels powerful. He feels the earth and the water and the wind and that warmth inside of him that he has dubbed his own internal fire.
He's not cold, there's a feeling of warmth coursing through him as the wind teases him, the water makes caressing motions and the earth holds him up.
This is his secret.
In these moments he's not alone. He's certain of that. He's not the only one who feels this joy, who rejoices in these feelings. He's glad; it is a feeling that is meant to be shared.
It's their secret.
It won't last long. Soon the sun will be out and the others will be here. The looks will return and his façade will be back in place. He can't act like this then; they get nervous and angry if he does.
But he will still have the memory of this and the knowledge that it will happen again soon.
After the rain comes the sun. The opposite is also true.
It's an eternal circle.
And that warmth, the internal fire, stays with him.