Learning to Forgive Yourself
For Ellenka , who encourages me to believe the "forest" can grow back~
Learning to forgive yourself,
Separate my body from my soul,
I light fires I can't control,
But I end the wars I start,
~Learning to forgive yourself,
Maybe it's selfish to die for love,
Still I hear my own voice cry,
"I volunteer" I hear it scream,
Far away ,like it's in a dream,
"Go ahead" I dare,
I see me being lead to die,
A thousand different times, same reason,
~Learning to forgive yourself,
Some of them you just can't save,
I hear voices in my head,
I put angels to bed,
With my songs,
I see girls go up in flames,
Boys begging me to let them die,
Unless they kill me,
From anger and fear(that were taught, replacing love)
~Learning to forgive yourself,
I am the bride of fire,
Bridal gown burns away, revealing black wings,
Now I am the angel of death,
The Mockingjay, I bring the Sleep,
Sleep from which they will not wake,
Goodnight...
~Learning to forgive yourself,
I kneel in the ashes of my hometown,
I lit the spark that burned it down,
But I end the wars I start,
~Learning to forgive yourself,
Intravenous penance,
I feel my blood like molten lead,
Trying to burn me from within,
Because my veins wouldn't let it all escape,
It wants to leave me, 'cause I failed them all,...
~Fire beats rose, every time,
What more could I do?
I burned my soul to save them,
And lost them all the same,
Burn away the roses on my grave,
Smash the urn amongst my District's ruins,
No one's coming to visit it ,or me...
~Learning to forgive yourself,
All the fault cannot be mine,
I may have started the fire,
But they stacked the coal,
I may have blown it all to Kingdom Come,
But I didn't build the bomb...
~If I'm at all justified,
I can say at least I tried,
And that I burned till my flame went out,
And that I gave my soul for love,
And maybe love is all there is,
And I loved till I bled, gave all, gave more,
I started and I ended the war,
All you can do is all you can do,
And all you can be is all you can be,
Let my blood run like rivers, I give it all,
~Maybe forests can grow back?
Seeds begin from out of their grave?
I've seen tall oaks come from tiny seeds,
I found primroses in the weeds,...
~So I forgive my self,
Let my voice echo off the shower walls,
Sing until my voice is gone,
Let the water run scarlet with my tears,
Wash away the stain I leave,
Wash away everything,
Don't try to forget, remember,
Set it all down in a tear- soaked book,
And when you look back, know you did well,
You served your time in total hell,
And don't judge yourself because you failed,
Applaud the fact that you tried,
And just let God be God,
Only God can save us all,
And have the guts to try,
Even if you fall...