1) Inevitable
Seifer liked the rush of power and euphoria he got when he inflicted pain; Hayner was easily overpowered by the wave of tingling adrenaline that came with being in pain…it was only a matter of time
2) Knowing
He lets Seifer touch him, lets him lead him away from the darkened sandlot. He lets that familiar tongue invade his mouth; lets the hands intrude where an enemy shouldn't. He doesn't voice objection when the clothes start coming off, piece by piece; or when the older boy starts whispering what can only be lies into his ear.
He takes it all in silence, leaving his heart unguarded, reveling it in while he still can.
Knowing that in the morning, it'd be like it never happened.
3) Allowance
Hayner screams because he doesn't know what else to do. He's confused and frustrated to the point where his insides are twisting violently and his muscles twitch.
Seifer lets him throw the first punch, not even bothering to dodge…
…just this once.
4) Whatever
It doesn't matter to him when he sees Hayner kissing Roxas. Why should he care?
He doesn't care that Hayner disappears from third period and comes back at lunch with sex hair.
He doesn't want to punch that random freshmen passing by when Hayner slips his hand into Roxas'.
He doesn't sulk, because what's there to sulk about? Who cares what (who) the chickenwuss does?
People say that if you lie enough, even you'll start believing yourself. Seifer finds that it doesn't always work.
5) Addiction
Hayner was forever a slave to his own weak will power, his addictions never kept in check, eating him from the inside out.
No matter how hard he tried, he could never break them; could never rid himself of the shackles that restrained him.
Seifer was one addiction of many, but one that seemed to fill the hole others created; allowing Hayner to free himself from the previous compulsions…one by one, until only one remained.
It was one that Hayner didn't mind all that much.
6) Movies
Hayner realized that he'd been watching more movies ever since he started dating Seifer.
On the other hand, ever since he started dating Seifer he'd been watching less of the actual movie.
7) Fear
Hayner used to be afraid of the dark. He used to be afraid of the monsters in his closet. He used to be afraid of being left home all alone…forever.
He's grown up now; that's what he tells anyone stupid enough to bring up his past. But that's not quite true.
He fears the suffocating darkness when Seifer is not with him. He fears the monsters that look just like him, walking down the hallways, sneering with disgust and judging him.
And most of all he fears the frantic thoughts that maybe one day he'll wake up and Seifer will be gone.
8) Relief
When Seifer goes missing it's like he took all the color with him. Hayner's world is grey and meaningless, the faces of the towns people are blank slates. He hates the idea that the bastard can affect him so much; he tries to pretend that he's okay and doesn't care about the sarcastic jerk.
He thinks it works for a while, but he's not fooling anyone. And he can't deny how everything comes rushing back once he sees that scar below the beanie he used to hate so much.
9) Truth
Seifer doesn't tell Hayner that he was the one who always chased the bullies away. He doesn't tell him about how they planned to get married at age eight. He doesn't tell him that he was the boy who used to hold him through the storms. He doesn't tell him that he was Hayner's first everything.
He doesn't tell him about the accident.
He doesn't tell him about seventh grade—
—the year Hayner forgot.
10) Redhead
Seifer knows that all redheads are horny perverts. So he doesn't hesitate to knock down the new kid when he sees him eyeing his rival.
Even if the new kid turns out to be a crazy pyro psychopath, with deceptively strong arms, and has at least a foot and a half on him height wise.
It's worth having the bruises as long as the new kid knows his place and what he can't have.
11) Sick
Seifer had no idea why he was standing in the ice cream aisle of his local grocery store. He normally didn't do things like this, as it was a complete waste of his time and he doesn't really give a shit. He really doesn't know why he's doing this.
Sudden his phone rings and he can't help the smirk that forms at the screen flashing caller ID.
Ah yes, that's why.
12) Scent
Hayner doesn't ask why Seifer smells of burnt cinnamon and clover, for fear of both the answer and driving the older boy farther away.
So he just pulls the taller boy close and tries not to breath.
13) Struggle
It took too long for Hayner to realize why, during struggle matches, Seifer pinned him to every available surface. And many years more for Hayner to realize that 87 percent of the time, Seifer wasn't pawing at him for the struggle balls.
14) Rose
Seifer always hated roses. He thought it was ridiculous that a flower embodied an entire emotion, they were just plants! They were overpriced, died too quickly, and overall a complete hassle. He never understood why anyone would want such a flower to describe their love.
His mom always scowled at such remarks and threatened that he'd never find love that way, as every girl loved getting flowers, roses especially.
Seifer couldn't wait to bring Hayner home.
15) Writer
All of the students, Hayner included, groan when their teacher, Ms. Yuna, assigns another in-class creative writing project. Their hopeless romantic of a teacher giggles and smiles, all sunshine and butterflies, and tells them to take out their journals and write for 40 minutes about their ideal partner. No limits or guidelines, whatever they can think off.
Hayner frowns with concentration, trying to figure that out for himself, pencil moving with jerky hesitation across the page.
Days later after Ms. Yuna has graded their impromptu essays she hands them all back to their respective owners; smiling extra sickly sweet as she places Hayner's on his desk. He frowns with confusion and looks at his paper to read whatever thoughts his teacher left for him.
He immediately blushes and slides down into his seat, trying to hide his burning cheeks. There is only one thing written at the bottom of his paper:
'Seifer?'
16) Music
Seifer never liked Hayner's music. It was all anger and frustration vented with barely distinguishable lyrics; hardly what some one would call real music.
But as much as he hated it, he found very quickly that it easily masked any noise that resulted from their 'study' sessions.
17) Moments
Their moments spent together -real times with out fighting to keep up pretenses- were fleeting and few. A moment spent together was usually only half an hour at most, a short time in which they had to make count by throwing themselves into it as much as possible.
They were like photographs: single scenes that were so short they had to hold as much feeling and emotion to truly convey the entire relationship. Because while most photographs were merely a small window into a whole adventure, their snap shots were the entire event.
A fleeting scene, a stolen moment, a frozen memory.
18) Butterfly
Very often Hayner found that he compared himself to a butterfly. He'd see the little work of art, beautiful yet so painfully fragile, and can't help but see the similarities.
They were so delicate, only pretty while in their last cycle of life, able to be snuffed out so easily.
He felt like that sometimes when he was with Seifer. Only attractive and worth something in the eyes of others while someone was interested in him. Yet so easily broken the moment that someone left. Such superficial creatures.
Hayner hated butterflies.
19) Forget
"I won't forget."
Hayner frowns at Seifer's words, a look of annoyance easily masking his hope. Roxas said the exact same thing once, and look where that got them. The blond had come back after a month with a new boyfriend and no explanation.
Seifer doesn't know about that though, so he's confused at the look of absolute fury in Hayner's eyes. He frowns right back, for different reasons, and shoves his beanie on the other's head. It mashes down the wild hair; the soft fabric ending up over Hayner eyes in an endearing fashion (not that Seifer would admit something like that). He quickly presses his lips to Hayner's; the kiss ends up undignified and a little angry.
"Hayner, I don't just say things for shits and giggles," Seifer spits out, his own version of a promise.
And Hayner wants to believe him, if only a little.
20) Contradiction
He struggles against the iron fingers, caressing and invading. He hates those fingers, no matter how good they make him feel. Hayner tries to push the other boy away, wanting nothing more than to pull him painfully close and feel the heat Seifer brings. He won't moan for Seifer, won't give him that satisfaction; but rolls his hips forcefully nonetheless.
He never seeks him out, yet never locks the door.
Seifer makes him ache, with both the passion he brings and the emptiness he leaves behind.
He knows Seifer isn't good for him.
But he can't bring himself to stop.
21) Half
Hayner listens to his mother with wide, innocent eyes. She's going on and on about 'true love' and 'signs' and other such sappy things a six-year-old boy doesn't really care about. But it is when she brings up something up about 'opposites attract' and 'other halves' that he really starts to listen, a puzzled expression on his face.
"Mama…" he interrupts, "what if two people are almost exactly alike?"
"Well, I don't know," she says thoughtfully, "I would guess that if they were too similar then they'd fight a lot. I don't think it would work out very well."
She really doesn't understand why Hayner bursts into tears.
22) Haughty
Hayner loathes how much of an arrogant prick Seifer is. But he is conveniently unaware of the fact that he can be just as stubbornly proud as the beanie-clad blond.
23) Armor
Hayner's cold exterior and bad attitude were just his ways of protecting himself. Seifer didn't need to protect himself because he worked hard so that almost everyone feared him. But they both come to realize that life is unsatisfying when lived as such.
"I'm so tired of fighting all the time." Hayner whispers, sounding somewhat distressed and also as if he's in the middle of a moan at the same time.
"I'll shield you." Seifer breathes, biting at the skin beneath his lips, holding the other as close as is physically possible.
It's sappy and cliché, but they just don't give a damn. Not when they're alone like this, when their armor slips away to reveal what they haven't allowed anyone else to see.
24) Sky
The sky was clear and blue; something rare for twilight town, but then again the day in itself was a rarity. Two sworn enemies laid side by side on the grass, seeming to be content just to have the spare time, and not wasting it by pretending to fight. They were quiet, each lost in their own thoughts: Hayner planning his strategy for the struggle tournament later, and Seifer planning his strategy of how he was going to successfully top the other. It would definitely be an interesting day, and all because the sky decided to be blue.
25) Ring
Seifer was not one to do something so frivolous as to buy a ring to show their love; and honestly, Hayner didn't really want one either.
But he has to laugh when Seifer walks up to him one day and offers him a warm doughnut, blushing lightly and glaring off to the side.
26) Introduction
He notices the other and eyes him skeptically, lips pouted in thought and hands fisted in his coat. The other second grader finally realizes that he is being watched and scowls, face all crinkled up in a glare.
"What are you looking at?" the-transfer-student-called-Hayner spits, hands tightly bunched up and raised as if he's ready to have an all out brawl right there and then.
And Seifer smirks because he likes the looks of the other well enough, and the attitude is refreshing. Yes, they'll get along just fine.
Although Seifer had a strange interpretation of 'getting along'.