I don't own Total Drama or Ned's Declassified

I thought it would be a fun parody to take Ned's Declassified but with Total Drama characters. I'm not sure if I'm going to continue with this idea but I wanted to see how it was received. Characters:

Ned: Cody, Moze: Courtney, Cookie: Harold, Loomer: Duncan, Susie: Gwen, Coconut head: Ezekiel, Martin: Cameron, Evelyn: Heather, Lisa: Beth.

Cody's Declassified School Survival Guide

Chapter 1: Dodgeball

It was a dark and stormy morning at James K. Polk High School. As rain poured down outside the school three rather wet teenagers made their way inside. All three of them were good friends and had been for a while now.

The boy on the left was Cody Anderson. He was a short, nerdy brunette with a gap in his teeth known for the guide he wrote to help kids survive school.

The girl in the middle was Courtney, a straight A student who excelled in sports (particularly volleyball) and was on the debate team. Without realizing it she was one of the prettiest and most popular girls at the school.

And the boy on the right was Harold McGrady, a nerdy redhead known for being one of the weirdest students at the school. Though he believes himself to be very cool he is often the victim of school bullying.

All three were quite glad to be inside and out of the rain. "I've never known it to rain this much so early," Courtney mused pulling her hood back.

"I'm soaked…" Harold's red hair was very wet yet he trying to get the raindrops off of his glasses.

Just then screams were heard. Two of their friends, Cameron and Ezekiel, came running down the hallway looking frightened.

"Run for your lives!" Cameron screamed.

"We're all gonna die!" Ezekiel cried out.

"Guys, what happened?" Cody asked the two frightened boys.

"It's raining outside," Cameron explained. "That means we're going to have gym indoors. This means we'll be forced to play…"

"Dodgeball!" Ezekiel finished his sentence just as a red rubber ball hit him in the back of the head.

They all turned to see where the ball had come from. They weren't surprised to see the school bully Duncan and his two goons Scott and Lightning. All three of them were riding on the side of a cart filled with dodgeballs and they all had one in their hands.

"Hey losers!" Duncan said throwing a dodgeball at Harold's stomach. "Ready to get creamed again?"

"Yeah," Scott snickered. "We're gonna destroy you!"

"Wait we have to play against your team again?" Cody asked.

"That's right geek!" Duncan said throwing a dodgeball straight at Cody's face. It hit dead on and knocked him to the ground. "See you in sixth period!" He laughed before leaving with his goons.

"Are you okay?" Courtney asked pulling Cody to his feet.

"This…could be a problem." Cody said rubbing the red mark on his face.

Just then the gym teacher coach Jo showed up with her hands on her hips. She suddenly breathed in deeply and then exhaled. "I love the smell of dodgeball in the morning!"

Harold walked over to her. "Dodgeball is a cruel and inhumane sport! You shouldn't keep forcing us to play it! Gosh!"

Jo scoffed, "Keep your panties on McGrady. Dodgeball is the only thing remaining of this country's once great warrior spirit!"

"But it's just Duncan and his team beating up on the rest of us!" Cody pointed out.

"That's why I'm making you captain this week, Anderson." She told the smaller teen.

"What? Why me?" He said freaking out.

"Listen, nobody's big enough or tough enough to take on Duncan. But you—you're smart. I know all about that guide you make to help other kids. So this time use it to help your team win."

As Jo walked away Cody looked down worried. "Now what am I supposed to do?"

Courtney shrugged. "You better come up with some tips—and fast."

Later during break the three of them were at their lockers. Harold pulled something out of his locker that looked like a motorcycle helmet.

"What is that?" Courtney asked warily.

"It's my new helmet cam." He explained. "I'm going to wear it in gym and record the horrors of dodgeball! Then I'll show the world how evil it is and get it banned from our school!" He said gleefully.

He quickly put the helmet cam on and turned it on. "Also," he said in a deep voice that sounded similar to Darth Vader, "it makes my voice sound really cool."

"Okay…" Courtney turned away warily. "How about you?" She asked Cody.

"Well I thought we were screwed until I remembered we have a secret weapon!"

"What's the secret weapon?" She asked feeling curious.

"It's you!" Cody exclaimed. "You're great at sports and great at dodgeball! With you on our team we'll win for sure!"

The CIT frowned. "I'm sorry Cody but…I can't."

"What?"

"I've decided never to play dodgeball again so I can't play on your team." She explained before swiftly walking away.

Feeling disappointed Cody kicked his locker. "Now what am I going to do?"

Just then he noticed Cameron, Ezekiel, and Beth walking backwards in a circle opening and closing umbrellas. As he came closer he could tell they were chanting something. "What are you guys doing?"

"It's a rain dance." Cameron explained as he walked backwards. "Only we're doing it in reverse to stop the rain."

"Yeah," Beth nodded. "If the rain stops we won't have to play dodgeball!"

But just then Duncan, Scott and Lightning showed up and started pelting people with dodgeballs again. The reverse rain dance trio broke up and scattered in different directions to try to avoid the carnage. Cody himself ducked down beside a garbage can and saw Sam run by screaming: "Oh man! We're all going to die by red rubber!"

Lunch came quicker than anyone hoped. Now gym was only one period away and everyone was nervous. Cody was now so desperate he had resorted to begging Courtney. "Please?"

"No."

"Pretty please?"

"No Cody."

He frowned. "Then I have to resort to desperate measures." He snapped his fingers and suddenly Cameron, Ezekiel and Beth all appeared carrying signs with Courtney's face on them.

"Courtney! Courtney! Courtney!" They chanted as they started to circle her.

"What are they doing?" The CIT asked alarmed.

"It's a "bring back Courtney" chant." Cody explained. "I explained the situation to them and they think this'll make you play dodgeball again."

"Would you guys stop doing this?" Courtney asked them but they just ignored her. "Ah come on!"

"Why won't you play dodgeball?" Cody asked.

"Don't you remember what happened last time I played?"

Cody thought for a second. "Uhhh…no?"

"Well I do," she said looking grim. Suddenly a flashback started in her mind. "It started out great. I was in the zone. I was hitting everything and everyone in sight and no one could stop me. And then it happened."

"What happened?"

"It was Ezekiel. He just came out of nowhere. I hadn't seen him and threw the ball far too hard. It hit him right in the face and knocked him to the ground. I…I gave him a bloody nose and knocked out two of his teeth!"

Surprised at this Cody looked back at Ezekiel who was still chanting. "Really? He looks fine to me."

"No!" Courtney shrieked. "Not again! I won't let it happen again!" She stood up and walked off.

Seeing this Cody grabbed Beth's sign and starting chanting with the others.

Meanwhile Harold was on the other side of the table tinkering with his helmet cam. Duncan, Scott and Lightning had come into the cafeteria and were throwing more dodgeballs at people. Suddenly one of the balls Scott threw hit Harold's helmet cam and knocked it to the ground.

"No!" Harold said picking it up. Looking it over he realized the camera part of it was broken. Next to it was the fallen dodgeball. He picked it up and stood up. "You broke my helmet cam! Jerk!" Scott was looking the other way as Harold threw the dodgeball as hard as he could at the back of the ginger's back. It hit him hard and he went down like a ton of bricks.

Duncan saw this and turned to Harold. "You hit him when his back was turned! That was dirty."

Harold gasped. "It was an accident! I was just so angry…"

"How did it feel?" The punk asked.

"It felt…good." He admitted. "Really good."

Duncan offered a dodgeball to Harold. "Join us Harold and together we will rule the dodgeball court!"

The geek thought about it for a second before shrugging. "Yeah why not?"

Before they knew it lunch was over and sixth period had arrived. After getting changed into their gym clothes everyone was waiting in the gym was the teacher to arrive and class to start.

Cody walked over next to Courtney. "I just want you to know that I picked you for my team anyway."

"That's nice. I picked a good book." She said whipping out one of her favorite novels.

"Hey…where's Harold?"

Just then the other team walked out onto the gym. Duncan and his two goons were both dressed in what appeared to be black armor. This didn't surprise anyone. What did surprise them was when someone else wearing the same outfit but with a black motorcycle helmet walked out behind them.

Flipping up the visor they could see that it was Harold. Cody was shocked. "Harold? You're playing for their team?"

"I'm sorry Cody," he said in a deep voice. "But you don't know the power of the dark side!"

Suddenly Coach Jo blew her whistle. "Alright maggots listen up! We're playing Bangkok winter rules Dodgeball! This is pretty much normal dodgeball I just decided to give it a really weird name. You can start when I blow the whistle!"

As the coach blew the whistle both teams rushed forward to grab the balls. Duncan's team reached them first and started to them threw at Cody's team.

"The first rule of Dodgeball," Cody explained. "Is to, well, dodge! If the other team can't hit you they can't get you out. So stay loose and pay attention!" He said as he dodged the red balls thrown at him.

Courtney however didn't try to dodge at all and was the first one out. She didn't look disappointed at all. Instead she walked over to the bench and pulled out her book to start reading.

"The second rule is to catch a ball thrown at you to get the other team out." Cody said as he caught a ball Trent threw at him. The musician was out. "Then you can bring back someone from your team. Hey Courtney come back in!"

The CIT had not gotten to read even a single page of her book so she looked annoyed as she walked back to the others. But she was immediately hit again and walked right back. Cody shrugged.

The game continued on as both teams tried their best to knock out the other team. Dodgeballs were flying left and right as teens did their best not to get hit by them. At some point Sam tripped and fell on the ground. His glasses fell off and landed a few feet in front of him.

He groped around for them until he felt a shadow over him. Looking up he saw Harold standing above him holding a dodgeball poised to attack. But he hesitated at the sight of Sam on the ground and did not attack.

Suddenly Duncan appeared at his side. "What are you doing Harold? Finish him!"

Harold pulled up his visor to look at the punk. "But…he can't even see!"

"If you want to rule this dodgeball court you must show no mercy! Now finish him!"

Harold nodded grimly before hitting Sam on the head with the dodgeball. The gamer went down and didn't come back up.

Elsewhere Cody was still trying to coordinate his team to win. "Here's another tip: if you don't have such a great arm try passing the ball to someone who does." Nearby Beth and Lindsay are seen passing the dodgeballs they pick up to Tyler who is rapidly throwing them at the other team.

"Another good technique is to team up with someone else. The first person lobs the ball right above someone's head. While that person prepares to catch it the second person throw another ball right at them as they're caught unaware."

This is shown as Mike throws the ball way up high. Geoff prepares to catch it but Cameron throws another ball and hits the party boy in the stomach. As Geoff walks off the court Cameron and Mike high five.

Meanwhile on the bench where Courtney is reading Ezekiel suddenly sits down beside her. Courtney briefly glances at him but then does a double take when she realizes he has a bloody nose.

"Zeke?" She says surprised. "You're bleeding."

"Huh?" he says opening his mouth. As he does two small white things fall out of his mouth. They look just like teeth to Courtney causing her to be even more surprised. Reaching down she picks them both up.

Examining them she realizes they're not teeth. "Is this…gum?"

"Yeah thanks," Ezekiel said grabbing both pieces out of her hand and popping them back into his mouth. "I always carry gum around with me. Want some?"

Courtney shook her head. "But…what about the bloody nose?"

"I have a medical condition eh." The less than hygienic boy explained. "It happens every once in a while. I've had it since I was six."

"So just to confirm: I've never hurt you with a red rubber ball?" Courtney asked.

Ezekiel shook his head. "You? No. Duncan? Yeah…" He said looking scared.

"This is great!" Courtney said as realization came over her. "Now I can play dodgeball again!"

Back on the court things were not looking good for Cody's team. Most of them had been eliminated and the only two left were Cody and Tyler. Suddenly Tyler was hit with two balls at once and the jock was out. Now Cody was all alone against Duncan, Scott, Lightning and Harold.

Lightning threw a dodgeball at Cody. The brunette was able to stop it with the one in his hands but he dropped that and fell to his knees. With no way to defend himself he was easy prey.

Harold came forward holding one of the red balls and loomed over his former friend. Cody looked pitifully up at Harold and waited for the end. But Harold hesitated again.

"Finish him Harold!"

"I…I…I can't breathe." He brought his arms over his head and pulled the helmet off. "That feels much better." He handed the helmet to Lightning. "This whole thing has gone too far. Good luck buddy." He said to Cody as he dropped the dodgeball into his friend's hands before walking off to the side.

"What?" Duncan said angrily. "Fine! We don't need him anyway."

"I get to bring someone back." Cody said looking around. "But who?" Suddenly a voice cried out.

"Me!"

Cody turned to see Courtney standing there wearing a bandana across her forehead with her hands on her hips. She walked onto the court and took the ball out of Cody's hands.

"So what?" Duncan said not worried at all. "There are three of us and only two of you."

"Yeah, and one of you is a girl!" Scott laughed.

"Yeah and the other one is Courtney!"

Courtney and Cody both frowned as all three boys laughed at their expense. Unfazed by their taunts the CIT took a deep breath before throwing the dodgeball straight at Duncan. The punk leaned to the right suddenly and avoided it.

"Ha! You missed!"

But the dodgeball bounced off the wall behind him, hit the nearby wall then slammed into Scott's head. It then bounced off Lightning's head, hit another wall before slamming into Duncan's stomach effectively eliminating all three of them.

Cody and Courtney turned to each other. "We did it!" They said together before high-fiving each other. Everyone else on their team cheered and rushed the court where they carried both of them off out of the gym.

"Whooo!" Jo cheered loudly. "Now that's what I call an exciting dodgeball game!" Just then a stray dodgeball came out of nowhere and hit her in the face knocking her to the ground.

If you like this idea tell me in a review. Also if there's a certain episode you'd like to see done tell me that too.