Part I - Realizations

"Bella - I'm begging you!" Jake pleaded. I grabbed his hand and he was trembling.

"Alice could you give us a second" I asked?

"Bella we may already be too late!"

"Alice, please - just one second!"

"Bella -"

"You heard her bloodsucker - go outside!" Jacob sneered. And Alice disappeared.

Being alone with Jacob felt so right - and as he wrapped his warm arms around me we seemed to fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. There was now a part of me that didn't want to go - a part of me that wanted to stay here, with Jacob. But whether or not I loved Jake, I couldn't let Edward die for no reason.

"Jake I -"

"Bella no! If you go I'll never see you again" as he said this, his grip on my waist tightened.

"Yes you will Jake! I promise I'll come back for you!"

"Hah!" he smirked "once you save him you'll just want him back and forget about me -"

"He doesn't want me back - he's already made that clear!"

"Then why is he going to kill himself for you?"

"Because he feels guilty that's why."

"I didn't know bloodsuckers had feelings."

"Jake" I said "I won't forgive him for leaving - you can guarantee that. But I will never be able to forgive myself if he kills himself over me - over what you said!"

"Hey! That's not my fault! I'm not the one who told him you were dead-"

Arguing with Jacob was pointless - he wanted me to stay and he was going to fight until he won. Still, I couldn't let Edward die. Even though he had hurt me - I still cared for him and I couldn't imagine a world where he didn't exist. I knew I had to save him; still Jake had put me back together when Edward had torn me apart and so I owed Jake for that.

As Edward had started to become just a faded memory Jacob became more real - as well as my love for him. Although I loved Edward and longed to see him - talk to him - touch his marble skin - I could never have a life with him. He had been right and I knew that now. If I wanted to stay in touch with my family and friends and perhaps start a family of my own I would have to stay human. Having only ever loved Edward I wasn't in touch with what I could have with a human boy. Or an almost human boy. A boy like Jacob. Yes this new life had defiantly presented its self to me in the months since Edward had left. and this life became more real as I felt Jacobs warm arms around mine and even more real when I reached up and pressed my lips to his. And Jacob kissed back and didn't have to restrain.

A sudden wave of anger rippled through jakes body – distracting me from our kiss. Something was making him mad. And when his lips found mine again a second later, I could feel him kiss me with more passion. A passion driven by his anger, an anger that intensified until I felt a cold hand on my shoulder – and I had to pull away.

"Bella, I understand if you don't want to go"

"No Alice! I'm not gonna let him die." I replied

"If you're sure Bella, I don't want to force you –"

"Yes Alice. I am sure. I need to do this" that would be my final answer. Whether he wanted me or not, I couldn't imagine a world without Edward. Besides, he deserved happiness and I wouldn't let him give up his whole existence over a misunderstanding. There was no question. I had jumped to see him. I could run to save him. I had to.

"Bella" Jacob whispered "please." I felt a pain stabbing at my chest when I though of how I was hurting him. I would come back for him. I loved him too. And he wanted me. And so he could have me – after this was over.

"Jacob. Listen to me. You kept your promise: to never hurt me. let me make a promise to you. One that I won't break: I will come back for you; Let me go and fix the damage I've done and then I will be back. For you I promise that Jake. You have never let me down and I know that. Trust me here.

"Bella, just be careful please."

"Don't work Jake, honey. Alice will protect me" I looked at her in reassurance.

"Well I will never keep a promise to a dog" she said as she glared a Jacob questioningly. "But Bella is like a sister to me. I would never let anyone hurt her." She glared a Jacob like her message was meant for him.

Jacob was already shaking when she grabbed my hand and my suitcase. She didn't let go until my seatbelt was on.

"Goodbye" I whispered. But Jake was already gone. As we pulled out of Charlie's driveway I caught a glimpse of something white by the side of the forest. It looked like a piece of a shoe.