Gai-sensei is so annoying to type his speech in all exclamation points... ;w;
Forgive the possible OCness. Oh, this might turn a bit crack-ish. ;w; Very sorry for those of you who don't like it, but... sorry. x) I'm not perfect, ya know!
Lee is assigned to stomp out all my flames. xD
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto... if I did... well... you know. x) Also thanks to Rob Zombie for giving me the lovely title idea!
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Hyuuga Neji is a horse. He is a white thoroughbred horse with a long, dark, flowing mane of brunette. He is strong, and stubborn, and often does not listen to what he is told.
Hyuuga Neji is a blind horse. His shocking bleached eyes see nothing but what is right, and what is wrong is shoved out of the way to melt into the horse's blind spot. Hyuuga Neji is a cold, skeletal horse.
Hyuuga Neji is an educated horse, a genius to his own name. He is smart, but he has flaws, and even though he strives to be perfect, there are things he can never do.
Rock Lee is a horse. He is a black palomino with a short, strictly cut black mane and tail. He is a powerhouse, huge, standing out against the other horses who cannot live up to the palomino. He does not stop, he keep going until he cannot go any longer.
Rock Lee is a good horse. He listens well and pushes himself to his limits. He keeps his appearances up so that he pleases his master and will get praise. Rock Lee is a kind, and gentle horse.
Rock Lee is an educated horse. As well as smart, he knows how act while around people who his master likes, and to not misbehave. He knows how to act around his fellow horses, so that he may not be shunned by them and instead become equals.
Educated horses are a difficult thing to keep in the same pasture. Horses that are educated should not be kept so close together. They know what goes on in the other horse's mind, and it is hard to keep them from stomping on each other's feet. Although, if a master of horses knows what he is doing, he may keep the educated horses in close contact without much fighting over who gets the best hay.
Gai-Sensei is a master of educated horses.
He knows how to keep educated horses together. He knows their weaknesses and strengths and uses them to their advantages. He knows that educated horses need to be trained, and educated some more.
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Lee shivered. It was cold. A light frost coated the ground, and the wind was blowing it into Team Gai's faces. He shuddered again, watching Gai-sensei bandage a cut in Neji's left wrist from where he'd sliced it open on a kunai.
"Gai-sensei?" He questioned at last, "How much longer are we going to be training for?" He waited with baited breath for Gai's reply. His breath didn't have to be baited for long, Gai answered him almost right away.
"You can stop," Gai said, waving halfheartedly. "We're done for today." He tore off a final strip of bandage and backed away. "That looks in order... feel alright, Neji-san?"
Neji nodded, and stuffed his hands into his pockets. "Fine, thank you." He turned away, and started to trudge off towards town. Lee waved at Gai, then started to follow, but-
"Wait, Lee-san, come back here for a minute."
Lee glanced up. "Hai?" He crossed back towards his teacher. "What is it, Gai-sensei?"
"Lee-san," Gai said thoughtfully, "I've been doing some thinking about you and Neji-san."
"Yes... what about us?" Lee asked, tilting his head to one side.
"You know Neji-san quite well, I presume, being his teammate, no?"
Lee nodded.
"EXCELLENT! So, you know how much of a hard-ass he is, right?"
Lee's eyes flew open wide. He'd never heard his sensei swear before, and was taken aback by it. "Hai...?"
"I need someone to teach him to loosen up. If this team is to be successful, we must learn to be more relaxed around one another! The tension that Neji-san contributes to the team is not helping! The power of youth must be in us all, and Neji-san's hard-ass-ness needs to be broken!"
Lee realized his mouth was open, and closed it. Then, struck a brilliant pose and gave his teacher the thumbs up. "Yosh! I will do my best to break Neji's hard-ass-ness! Do not worry, Gai-sensei, I will not fail you!"
"Excellent! Now, Neji does not know this yet, but I have arranged for you two to live together so you can study him and learn his emotional and mental weaknesses! Now, off with you, and when you catch up with Neji-san, send him to my house at 6:00 tonight so that I may tell him of the plans. Also, keep it a secret what you are doing! I do not want Neji-san to know that you are trying to break him of his habits! I will tell him that you are simply living together to create a better bond between the team!"
"Wonderful!" Lee said, his eyes sparkling. "Amazing plan, Gai-sensei! Now, I am off! I will tell Neji-san for you! Yosh!" And with that, he bulleted away, speeding towards town as fast as he could go.
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"Hey! Hey! HEY, NEJI-SAN!!"
Neji paused, about to enter the ramen hut. He shut the door he had been about to open, and turned around to see Lee jogging towards him. "Lee? What is it?"
Lee stopped, panting. "Gai-sensei... he wants... you to go... to his house.. tonight... at... 6:00... to...tell you something..." He leaned against the wall, shaking his head.
"Oh... okay... hm.. well... thank you for telling me," Neji said, frowning a bit. After a pause, he nodded his head towards the ramen hut. "Care for lunch?"
Lee nodded gratefully. "Of course. Thank you." Neji held open the door and the two of them ducked out of the cold.
As soon as they were inside, the tantalizing smell of ramen and a wave of heat and the clatter of chopsticks and voices hit them. Lee drew in a deep breath and sighed. "Ahhh. It smells wonderful in here."
Neji had an odd smile on his face. "Yes... it does...Well, shall we get a seat?" He glanced at his teammate.
Lee yawned and nodded. "You first," He said waving him forward. Neji put his hands into his pockets and led the way towards the back of the shop. "Uhm..." Lee searched his mind for something to talk about. "So, is your hand okay."
Neji nodded. "Yeah. It was just a scratch, I don't see why Gai-sensei was acting so worried about it."
Lee laughed, "A scratch? Neji-san, it stained the grass with your blood! You call that a scratch?!"
Neji grinned half-heartedly. "Yes, I do. Now come on, let's order."
Minutes later, the two of them were back at their table. Lee swirled the ice in his water for a good 30 seconds before dipping his hand in and scooping out an ice cube. He plunked it into his ramen broth and watched it melt.
Neji stared. "Why did you do that?" He asked, tilting his head to one side.
"Let it melt, and it cools it off." Lee answered with a shrug, taking a sip of his water and picking up his chopsticks. "Something that Naruto-san taught me."
Neji rolled his eyes. "That guy knows eeeverryyything about ramen, doesn't he?" He poked at a bit of shrimp floating in his own shrimp-and-lime ramen. "He's like the Hokage of ramen."
Lee chuckled and chewed thoughtfully. "This is true. I have never thought of him as official Hokage material, however, so we might as well let him be Hokage of ramen."
Neji smirked. "That's all he's good for, anyway.." He picked up a shrimp and promptly dropped it. "Shit..." He tried again, "Shit..."
"Not true," Lee contradicted, "While he may be rambunctious,-"
"Shit..."
"-unorganized, thoughtless,-"
"Shit..."
"-and a bit on the unorthadox side,-"
"Shit..."
"Neji-san..."
"Wha- shit."
"What is the problem?"
"Slippery shit, er, shimp..." Neji palmed his face, and laid down his chopsticks. Lee's face broke out in a grin and he leaned back in his chair, laughing.
"That was priceless, Neji-san," Lee said finally. Neji was red in the face, looking around carefully.
"Hope nobody heard that," Neji muttered, "Damn..." He picked up his chopsticks again.
"Now, as I was saying-"
"SHIT!"
Afternote: Yes, dammit, I'm aware that Neji wouldn't 'look around carefully', he'd just do a Byakugen thing and... yeah. xD But don't judge meeeh, it fit the scene, so there. xD
And yes, if you noticed an absense of Tenten, you'll find out why in later chapters.