Consolation
It was a wonderful day on that warm afternoon in Konoha. The sun was high above the sky at midday, and with the exception of a few fluffy and full clouds, the sky was a beautiful shade of blue. The streets were busy; children running with parents in tow; street vendors shouting their goods to the general public, hoping for someone to stop by. On any other day; any other occasion; it would have been a great day for Naruto Uzumaki. But, pondering on his long time friend, Sasuke Uchicha's fate was something that always got him slightly depressed.
And this particular day was only going to get worse.
"What the hell were you thinking?!" an angry and confused Naruto spat to the reigning Hokage. The look of rage and sadness present in his eyes was obvious as Tsunade looked closely at him, showing no emotion herself. She had just answered his question of, "Did you send him on that mission?" and he was not thrilled with the fact that she did.
"You know how the perverted hermit got! Why did you just let him go on such a risky –" "Enough Naruto." Hatake Kakashi interjected in a quiet voice.
Naruto didn't know exactly what to think at that point in time. A million things were running through his mind. The legendary Toad-Sannin, Naruto's sensei, and in his opinion, close family member, Jiraiya, had perished in battle? 'This is impossible' he said to himself. ' He was. . .he was the best. . .' Naruto thought quietly to himself as memories of his teacher flew through his mind. All the things he had taught Naruto, wether perverted or actuallly helpful, couldn't help him save himself? All the bragging of being the best ninja in the world couldn't stop his demise!?
Naruto was brought back to reality as his Team Seven leader spoke again. "You should understand exactly how the Fifth feels." He said while staring at the Hokage. Naruto looked up and turned his direction towards Tsunade's face. He didn't exactly know how to react to what he saw. There was nothing on her face; no sadness, no regret, no anger even, and Naruto knew that was one of her most used emotions for any situation. It was like she had no feelings at all. Naruto couldn't read any feeling on her face or in her eyes. They stared for several moments before Naruto felt he needed to take action.
He needed to get away. He needed to be comforted and have a feeling of familiarity, and nothing in the room he was currently residing was going to do anything to stop the pain that was throbbing in his chest. The terrible sorrow that was flowing through him was eating at his heart already, as he couldn't stop thinking about his great friend and teacher.
"…Fuck this." He let out with a deep breath as he turned to leave. "Naruto! Where are you going!" A concerned Sakura asked.
Sakura had every right to be concerned. Sakura knew where situations of having some close to you die could lead to. She knew her teammate Naruto would be angry, veangful, and probably confused about what was going on, and all she wanted was to make sure that her teammate would be ok. Over the years that she had been trained by the Fifth Hokage, Tsunade had taught her many important things.
And, generally when she was under the influence of a bottle of sake, she had spilled many stories of her own life and life situations. From first love, to losing those who she cherished the most, Sakura had thought a lot about issues they shared, and how Tsunade's experiences applied a lot to her own.
She couldn't really say she was 'in love' with Naruto. She just knew that she cared for him like the wonderful friend he was. OK, maybe a little bit more than that. She knew Naruto liked her, she could even bet that he loved her, but she could never reciprocate the feelings. Contrary to what Naruto believed, which is that she still loved Sasuke, it was in fact the feeling that she didn't deserve him.
What had she done to deserve someone who was so loving, so caring, so protective, funny , and all around great to be with? She hadn't gone through the pain that Naruto had. She'd never been shunned by an entire village or beaten in an alley just for existing, so how could she even identify with him? But even when she would get the feeling they would never be together, some event (usually Naruto coming to her rescue) would bring them closer and she'd feel better about their confusing relationship.
Sakura, however, was at a loss for what to do now. Tsunade had never talked about what had happened after her tragic losses. She didn't know what she did to come out of such a depressing state (although she had a hunch that gambling and sake had something to do with it). She just knew that right now, Naruto was in pain, and this time she would come and rescue him.
Naruto's departure was left with a simple, "Let him go Sakura. He needs time to clear his head."
Sakura hesitated for a moment and thought. 'If I chase after him. . .what could I even say to comfort him?'. She already felt so useless and far away from Naruto and she hadn't even said anything to him. She looked around at everyone's dropped faces, and ignoring her sensei's words, darted from the room and left the group to sit in silence.
"Naruto!" Sakura hollered as she flew through the Tower doors. She looked around frantically, she didn't know what Naruto would or could do to himself right now, and she really needed to know that he was alright.
Suddenly, out of the corner of her eye, she caught the orange and black jumpsuit disappear over the rooftop of a store. From the direction and speed he was headed, it looked like he was trying to get to his apartment – fast. Sakura sighed inwardly to herself. 'Maybe it would be good if I l eave him alone for awhile, usually I mess these kinds of things up. 'CHA! Naruto-kun needs our help right now and you're just going to forget about him?! What about all those times he saved our ass?!" Inner Sakura hollered.
Sakura flinched and remembered what she had told herself just moments before.
'This time I'll be the one to help him!' she spoke inwardly and took off to the rooftops.
'You stupid pervert! You stupid, stupid old man!' Naruto yelled bitterly to himself. No matter how much he had insulted the old hermit, or had some fun at his expense, that never changed the fact that the man was like a grandfather to him. One who always could impart bits of wisdom and advice that would someday help him; and now he was gone. Naruto couldn't stop the tears that streamed down his face as
he headed for his home. The wind burned his eyes and blew away the tears, but not the hurt that was inside. Whenever he would have problems, he would turn to Jiraiya, but with him gone, who was there?
He suddenly was overwhelmed with a feeling of loneliness and sadness. He just wanted to go home and stop thinking. He wished he could just shut off his mind and drown the emotions he was feeling at the moment; the emotions that did nothing but remind him more and more of his former teacher. It was then that he felt the pinprick of a presence behind him. That particular presence that always managed to calm him down, or in some cases, get him rilied up. The girl he had loved so long; the girl that smelled of cherry blossoms and the girl that he could never have.
He didn't need anymore feelings of loss and loneliness, so he picked up his pace until he could no longer feel her following him. 'I can't have Sakura-chan seeing me like this anyway. . .she'd never understand. . .'
Eventually, he arrived at his apartment building. A tall building, albeit a bit dated; it was the place that he'd called home for so many years of his life. The place that was given to him so that he didn't have to live on the streets. It was cramped, and messy, but right then he wouldn't trade it for anything. Hehad enough money saved up for a long time from doing all his missions. So much so, that he probably could have rented several apartments in the complex, but he was more of a sentimental person. He had always loved the home that was his refuge for so many times, and he never wished to give it up. He was home and that's where he wanted to be. Away from the world and curled in a ball on his bed was all he longed for.
He opened the creaky double doors and began his trudge up the staircase to his apartment. Opening the door he immediately removed his ninja pouches and jacket, leaving them to lay lifeless on the floor as he walked slowly to his bedroom. He removed his shoes only at the foot of the bed and flopped down onto the comfy mattress.
Only then, in the comfort of his own home and bed, did he let his tears flow. He sobbed in silence, dwelling on all the great times he had had with Jiraiya, and for all the bad times they had survived through. That was one thing that Jiraiya had always stressed with him. "No matter how hard things get, always trudge on! There's better times ahead!"
He almost laughed at that. He could just see the old pervert saying that as a swarm of women chased him from the bath house. He imagined that's how the old hermit went out; trudging on in the face of his enemy until it was all over. That brought him back into a somber mood as he drifted off to an uncomfortable sleep.
Naruto awoke not very long later to the sound of his door being opened. He knew immediately who it was from the presence, but he didn't do anything about it. It was probaby just some message from Tsunade-baa-chan or Kakashi, so he guessed he would listen.
He wiped his reddened eyes and sat up for a moment and awaited her arrival in his room.
". . .Naruto? Naruto are you here?" Sakura questioned in a quiet voice. She had stood outside for awhile, just contemplating what she would say to her friend. Wondering if anything she said would even have an effect on him. She eventually built up her courage and began the walk up the tall staircase to his apartment and when she knocked and got no reply, she let herself in.
She was standing just inside the doorway as she took in her surroundings. The discarded clothes, the empty ramen cups in the kitched, and the dust that seemed to cover a lot of the room made her wonder for a moment if Naruto ever cleaned.
She was about to leave, seeing as her question went unanswered, and turned to open the door once more before she heard that voice. His voice.
It was quiet. Overlaid with sadness, but she heard it. "Sakura-chan?" He finally let out into the uncomfortable silence. "Is that you?" He inquired. Sakura walked quickly towards the back hallway of the apartment, frantically popping her head in the small rooms that lined either side of the walls. 'Bathroom? No. . .Closet? No. . .' Sakura reached the door at the far end of the hall and quietly creaked it open to find a sight she didn't ever want to see.
There he was; Konoha's most hyperactive ninja; the boy with the bright blonde hair and beautiful cerulean eyes that you could get lost in, ones that were always full of life and vigor and enough energy to last him days. Except, the eyes she met when he glanced upward were wet and reddened. The room was dark, several clothing items scattered around and an almost empty box of tissues next to his bed. The ground was littered with ones that had already been used. When they locked gazes, Sakura, for once, couldn't read what was in his eyes. She knew a part of it was sadness, but she sensed something much deeper. Longing? Want? She knew Naruto would never think of wanting her at a time like this, no matter how many pervy things Jiraiya had instilled in the young man.
'. . .Jiraiya-sama' She thought to herself. He was the one Naruto was always bragging about. Always confident he would be the best in the world because he was being trained by a Sannin. She knew it went beyond that though. She knew that he had loved the man like the family he never had. He was one of his precious people, the ones that didn't treat him differently because of what he had sealed in his stomach. He was always kind to Naruto, even when he would put up the façade of being stern or mean.
That's when she came to her senses and finally deciphered the feeling she saw in Naruto's listless eyes. Love. It was love mixed with want. He wanted someone to love him, to hold him, to tell him everything was all right. Even the toughest of heroes had their down moments at times, and for Naruto his moments never seemed to be easy. He was always the one who was put in the worst positions. Losing everything that was close to him, or being hated for having the Kyuubi sealed in him. But Naruto never complained about things like that. He shrugged them off and would go on training for becoming Hokage one day or something like that. She always knew that the day he fell, he would fall hard, but she didn't really expect this.
There she was. The girl he had loved so many years, standing in his bedroom doorway, looking at him with a face full of disbelief. The girl with the soft pink hair and who smelled like summer cherry blossoms, who knew all about Naruto. But Naruto had never been like this before. He was never known for showing his vulnerable side to anyone, save maybe Iruka-sensei, Granny Tsunade, and Jiriya. And here he was, showing himself truly to her in all his glory. With the look that she gave him, he at first thought she wanted to get out of there. She didn't want to see Naruto like this. He was supposed to be happy! The shining beacon of hope in the middle of all the bad that occurred in the world. He would one day become the strongest shinobi in all the land. But right now he he was so weak. He knew he didn't want Sakura to leave. He, for just one time in his life, wanted to have her affections and love. The ones she had always given to him. The love and caring he gave for her, he wanted back.
". . .Oh, Naruto. . ." She let out, finally ending the uncomfortable silence. She walked up to him, but before she was close enough to touch him he got defensive. "What are you doing here and what do you want Sakura?" He said coldly as he diverted his gaze to the floor, which was looking more and more interesting by the second.
Just his name. That's all she said, and he felt like he could come out of depression in a snap. He knew she wanted to come close to him, but he also felt like it was all for naught. 'What's the point when she already loves someone else?' He thought to himself as he turned around to face the window. He didn't really want to argue with his inner self and with these new emotions that were rising with him. He just wanted to be alone.
"Well?" He spoke as he stared out onto the village of Konoha.
Sakura was at a loss. All the feelings of hopelessness she had just suppressed were coming back to her. She was never good with words. She didn't know what to say. This was one of the only times Naruto had ever denied her presence. She knew he wanted her to go, but she felt it would be too much to bear, so she decided to comfort him with actions, not words.
She inched forward slowly, small droplets appearing in her now darkened green eyes. She didn't see any movement coming from Naruto, little did she know that he was so deep in his own thoughts that he had already blocked out what was happening around him. She moved slowly, until she was right behind him, and admired at the marvel that he had become over his years of training. He was only wearing his black tee shirt and a pair of loose slacks. His muscular arms flexed every time he shifted to a new position to ponder in his mind. He had grown so much. He had been through so much, and Sakura just wanted to be with him for awhile.
Naruto finally sensed the close proximity of the presence behind him, and looked over his shoulder at Sakura. "Ne, Sakura, if you don't mind I'd really like to –" Was all he got out before his breath was caught in his throat. Sakura had wrapped her arms around his waist from behind, and buried her head in the crook of his neck. She let the tears flow freely from her eyes, the liquid heat falling onto Naruto's shirt. He was shocked, to say the least. The girl he had always admired and tried to help now had her soft pale arms wrapped around his midsection, and she was crying. He had a lot of inner turmoil and
confusion going on within him. 'What did I do to make her cry?' He thought worriedly to himself. 'I'm the one mourning here! Not her. . .'
His thoughts and confusion were interrupted when she finally took a deep enough breath to speak.
"Na. .Naruto. . ." She began, "I'm so sorry." Hearing her cry and apologize for nothing made his brain and heart hurt. He turned around while still in her embrace, and stood up off the bed as he reached his own arms around her and spoke softly into her ear. "You don't have anything to apologize for Sakura-chan."
"But I do Naruto! I've. . ." She took another deep breathe, "I've always neglected everything you gave me. You were always there for me Naruto, always there whenever I needed you to be, and I was never thankful. I always blew you off like you were nothing, and I just thought. . ." Naruto silenced her by pulling him tightly into his embrace. "Sakura-chan, you know I love you, and the fact that you even pay attention to me is enough to make my heart soar. Please don't cry, it really hurts me to see you like this." Were the words that floated to Sakura's ears and made her feel so wonderful inside. Her stomach was fluttery and her heart felt so much more relaxed and at ease.
She pulled away from him, just enough so that she could really look him in the eyes, and spoke again. "It's just that, you were always there for me, and right now I know you need someone to be here for you, and I thought that I could be that person, but here I am crying, and making you feel even worse. . ." She was already about to start on more sobs when Naruto's own eyes started tearing at the thought of his teacher.
Naruto pulled on Sakura, and accidentally fell backwards on the bed. He let his anguish flow freely now, he knew he didn't have to be afraid with Sakura there, and he shifted so that his head rested in the crook of his neck as he let out quiet sobs.
Sakura took advantage of the position by rubbing Naruto's back and stroking his head lightly. It didn't take long for him to cry himself to sleep, but this time, it was a peaceful one. He looked so much more relaxed and at easy, laying there on her shoulder. She almost didn't want to leave. It was so relaxing too; seeing as they were on his bed and his arm was wrapped tentatively around her waist. In any other circumstances, this would have been punishable by several near death beatings, but in this case, she found the entire experience to be quite comforting. She took this thought to her mind as she began to feel drowsy and fell into a quiet sleep along with Naruto.
It was several hours later before Sakura began to stir. Her half-dazed eyes flitted open several times and after she adjusted to the setting sun outside the window she surveyed her surroundings. She looked around the small room and the thoughts and memories of what had happened only hours before flew back to her mind. She gazed downward to see the still sleeping Naruto, resting comfortably on her, and she began to think of how she could get out of this. She knew she didn't really want to leave, but she knew if she didn't get home soon, her parents would probably grow frantic and angry- and that would not end well.
She gently tugged at the arm around her waist, and tried to pull it away, only to find that it tightened around her. "Naruto, please. . ." She quietly as she tugged at him again. "I really have to go." Naruto finally opened his eyes and looked up to her face. Her features were perfect in his opinion. Her soft pink hair draped her (Although in discordance with Ino's opinion) beautiful forehead, which lead to her soft, green eyes that could see right through him. And her moist lips that almost begged to be kissed fully accentuated her entire face. She tightened his grip around her waist, and slowly, almost hesitantly moved his other hand from under Sakura's head to her cheek.
"Sakura-chan. . .Please stay with me tonight. . ." He let out in a quiet whisper, almost to himself. "I don't want to be alone anymore."
It was enough to see her teammate suffer, and she would do anything to stop it, and if anything meant sleeping with him (innocently of course) and being by his side for a night, she was sure she could deal with the consequences her parents dished out the next day. She could always just tell them she had to work a late shift at the hospital or something anyway.
So, she decided, she would stay. She voiced this response to Naruto with a simple nod of the head as they both got up and resituated their positions to lay fully on the bed, instead of having their legs dangle off the side.
Sakura laid down first, and Naruto took the position he was previously in, resting his head back on her shoulder and wrapped an arm back around her waist. He was glad she was here. He knew that he would still be sad for his teacher, but he also knew that Jiraiya would always want him to be happy, and in all honesty, Naruto really couldn't be any happier than in the position he was in currently.
So, he let out a small smile and cuddled up next to his longtime teammate and friend and looked up at her face once more. This time, he moved his face close, and went to the side where he hair covered ear was. She could feel the hot breath slowly bringing a red tint to her cheeks as she wondered what he was getting at.
Naruto took a deep breath, breathing in her lovely scent before speaking quietly into her ear.
"Sakura-chan. . ." The way he said her name made her shiver and sent tingles down her spine as she waited for the rest of what he had to say. ". . .Thank you." He said silently, before quickly moving his lips to her cheek and giving it a soft and delicate kiss. He then moved his head back to the crook of her neck as he fell into a deep sleep.
Sakura was at a loss. That was a very un-Naruto thing to do. Thank someone? And show such a subtle show of affection? She didn't quite know what to think, so she let any thoughts she had about the matter drift from her mind as she pulled a blanket over the two of them and drifted away into a very, very comfortable sleep.
For a moment before she slept she wondered what Jiraiya would have thought of the whole situation, before letting out a sigh along with a small, "Pervert".
The End.
AN: Yeah, so I heard when you first start writing fanfictions, you should start out with oneshots. Yup,this is my first attempt at a fanfiction, for any anime, movie, or any other thing you can write fanfics about. Lulz. Now, I know you're totally stunned by its supreme aura of awesomeness (Or in disbelief by how terrible it is), but could you review for me please? It would really help me…
So that? It's so close…just below these words….It says review…It's asking-no begging you to click it. Heh, look at that, it's my first time writing and I'm already begging for reviews.