This story focuses on Ginny and how she copes with the loss of her soul mate. I know I won't include as much of the other characters as much as they deserve but I shall try. I intend to take the story to the end of the summer where Ginny and Hermione return to school and Ron and Neville join an auror academy. I did not want Harry to be killed off and am so relieved that he wasn't.
I have never wanted to think about what would have happened had Harry died and it took until now to do so. A song by Oliver Boyd and the Remembralls, Open at the Close made me think of what would happen to Ginny if Harry had died, the lyrics: 'Ginny please don't you cry, know I'll always love you.' I find really touching and moving. I cried the first time I heard the song, it really is that beautiful and moving.
I was inspired to actually write this, however, by a BBC3 programme called 'Our War'. It uses soldiers footage to record their experiences of the war in Afghanistan and the first of the episodes (shown on the 7th of June 2011) details the death of a 19 year old soldier on his first tour. Most of the company were of a similar age and also on their first tour. I can't imagine, firstly, what is would be like to be in those soldiers position and, secondly, what I would do if I lost any of my family or friends. I have a couple of friends who are going to join the forces and, selfish as it is, I really wish they weren't. To all those soldiers who put their lives on the line, I am truly grateful and humbled by your bravery.
Her bag is now much heavier
I wish that I could carry her
But this is our ungodly hour
I know you're leaving now
Cause I held on to my way tightly
Stay still until you know
Tomorrow finds the best way out is through
Ungodly Hour, The Fray
That was it. Voldermort was dead. Her brother and his best friend had killed him. He could hurt them no more. But it was already too late, the damage had been done. He was gone. Too noble and brave for his own good. She ran to the body in the middle of the Great Hall. Maybe he was there somewhere; maybe he could live. Adrenalin coursed through her body. She fell to her knees in front of him.
''Harry,'' she whispered, ''Come on. I'm here Harry.''
''Ginny,'' she felt her older brother's hand rest on her shoulder, as beside her Hermione fell to her knees in disbelief.
''Harry. Come on, wake up,'' she continued to talk to him, shake his shoulders, make him damn well listen. He couldn't leave her again, he had only just come back, ''He's gone, he's gone, Voldermort's dead. You can live.''
But Harry didn't move. He remained still on the cold, hard floor, eyes shut. Beside her, Ron and Hermione were quietly sobbing. They didn't understand that he was going to wake up in a minute. The green light hitting him had been an illusion; he was going to make it. In a minute he would wake up. The red-head lifted his head and placed it on his lap.
''Harry,'' she repeated his name, ''You can wake up now. The others killed him; you can live in peace now. Wake up.''
People began to surround the four of them. Someone bustled in and grabbed Harry's wrist, checking for a pulse. Tension filled the room as they waited for the verdict. Ginny held on to Harry, of course he was fine. He'd been knocked out time and time again before. In a minute he'd wake up.
''He's gone,'' a deep voice rang out across the Great Hall.
''No,'' Ginny cried, ''He's fine; he'll wake up in a minute!''
She felt her father's hand rest on her shoulder: ''Ginny, come on.''
It hit her suddenly then. She couldn't feel life in Harry. He felt empty. He was dead. She felt the bottom fall out of her world as sobs wracked from her body. It was like a physical pain, deep inside her.
''No Harry, no,'' she repeated over and over again, tears pouring down her face. She didn't feel the people try to make her stand, to make her move away. She just sat, holding Harry's beautiful head in her lap; the tears pouring down her face. She couldn't move, he had to be here. But she still couldn't feel him. There was nothing there apart from the empty shell of a body. And she couldn't stop crying. She tried to pull it together but her body wouldn't let her. She couldn't let go of him, if she stayed here forever then she could pretend that he was just sleeping. Hermione and Ron had moved on, still crying, but Ginny barely noticed. Her guts felt like they had been kicked hard.
''Come on Ginny,'' a strong voice came from above. Why did she recognise it? The owner of the voice knelt down beside her, ''Come on, leave him now. You need some rest.''
Neville rested his head on her shoulder, his hands on her waist. But she remained frozen to the spot, holding on to the empty shell, flanked by Neville and her father. Her sobs became louder and she couldn't breathe anymore. He couldn't be gone, he should be invincible. He breathing became shallower and shallower as she cried and cried. His scar stood out on his forehead, eternally scarred. And then she felt nothing, just the enveloping blackness.
''It's just exhaustion and stress I think, Mrs Weasley,'' a kind voice was saying. Ginny fought against the blackness threatening to drag her back under.
''Oh thank goodness,'' her mother said. She wasn't far away. Ginny opened her eyes.
''Mum?'' she croaked. Her mother gasped and grabbed her hand.
''Ginny? It's ok. We're here sweetheart. How do you feel?''
Madam Pomfrey rushed around, checking her temperature, pulse and other vital signs. She felt no pain though, as she remembered what had happened. Just a dreadful numbness from her toes to her fingertips.
''I'm ok Mum,'' she smiled weakly, ''Sorry for scaring you.''
''Oh darling, it's ok,'' she pulled her daughter into a hug. When Ginny pulled away from her, she saw the bags underneath her mother's tearstained eyes.
''How are the others?'' Ginny asked, almost fearful of the answer.
''They're ok. Your father is on his way to see you, he's just popped out to grab a bite to eat,'' her mother sounded falsely cheerful. Of course no one was ok; her parents had lost the equivalent of two sons, her brothers had lost a brother and a best friend. Even thinking all this, Ginny couldn't feel any emotion. She couldn't cry anymore.
''So what's happening now?'' Ginny wanted to know, any little detail might make her feel again, might take away the numbness.
''Well now that you're awake and Ron and Hermione have got up, I think we're going to head back to the Burrow. We should be safe their now.''
''Yes, you're free to go now,'' Madam Pomfrey added, exhaustion clear in her voice.
Ginny swung her tired legs out of the bed. Her face felt tight with the tears that she had cried before and she could taste the dried sweat on her lips. A streak of blood ran down one side of her face, mixing with her tangled hair. More blood was visible on her arms and she found that she couldn't bear much weight on one knee. Her whole body felt heavy and sore.
She followed her mother out of the make shift hospital wing. The castle had been destroyed; a path created from the Great Hall to the main doors was the only clear route through the entrance hall. Waiting by the main doors was Neville. He pulled her into a hug when they reached him.
''Oh Ginny,'' he murmured into her hair.
''Hey Nev,'' she spoke to him, ''How are you doing?''
Neville shrugged his shoulders. His eyes too looked tired and tear stained.
''I'm keeping reporters out but all the protective charms have been lifted, so it's a bit of a nightmare,'' he explained.
''You look exhausted though. Why don't you go and get some rest?'' she asked, concerned. Like her, Neville was dirty and blood streaked, bruises showing across his arms and legs already.
''I can't Gin,'' he looked at her, ''It's better this way, I'm kept busy.''
''Come on Ginny,'' her father's quiet voice came from behind her, ''Our portkey's ready.''
Ginny gave Neville one last look.
''You're welcome to come over whenever Neville. Get some rest.''
The Burrow had been destroyed. Death Eaters had obviously searched the place. The boys stood in horror at the wreck which was once their home. Her mother broke down in tears. Bill stepped forward and took hold of his mum's arm, apparating her away. Their father apparated away too, holding onto George's arm. Charlie wrapped his arms around Ginny and apparated her to Shell Cottage as well. Ron, Hermione and Percy arrived a few moments later.
Shell Cottage remained standing; no-one had found it to destroy it. Bill and Mr Weasley took Molly inside; she was beside herself with grief, triggered once more by the destruction of their home. No-one spoke outside. Ginny sat on the bank, looking out at the sea; vast in the drizzle which was now falling around them. She couldn't believe that their home was gone but she still felt no emotion. She welcomed it now though. The pain was too great.
Hermione sat next to her, wrapping an arm around her. Ron had taken George indoors with Charlie and Percy.
''Are you ok Gin?'' the brunette asked. Ginny shrugged her shoulders.
''You?'' she returned. Hermione instead shook her head but held in the tears which welled up in her eyes. Hermione looked worse than anyone. The lack of food and the stress had caused her to lose weight which she didn't have to lose; her ribs could be counted through her t-shirt and her hip bones stuck out painfully. Her head looked too large for her body and she looked like she had been thumped in the eyes, the shadows were so prominent. The once beautiful, thick hair now lay limp and flat against her head, thinning in places. She looked so fragile, Ginny thought.
''Food?'' Ron croaked, appearing at the front door. He too looked gaunt. Dirt streaked his sun burnt face and his eyes were a dull blue as opposed to their usual bright blue. They may have beaten Voldermort, but the victory was hollow to them all; the sacrifices too much.
Ginny got up and pulled Hermione to her feet. Fleur had put some chocolate biscuits on the kitchen table with cups of tea of coffee. Ginny drank her tea in a few gulps, barely feeling it scorch her throat. She ate a biscuit too, but couldn't taste it. The boys ate but Hermione only sipped at her tea carefully. No-one spoke. No-one knew what to say.
When Ginny could take the silence no more, she headed outside to the beach. She had been planning to sit, but now that she was there, she wanted to move around, stretch out the stiffness which had taken her body from before. The sea crashed beside her but it was somehow peaceful. She walked along the shoreline focussing on the sights and smells surrounding her.
Footsteps behind pulled her focus away though. Bill wrapped an arm around her shoulder as they continued to walk.
''It's beautiful here Bill,'' she smiled weakly at him.
''I know,'' he replied, ''Fleur and I feel so free here. Sometimes it's like we're the only people in the world.''
''I'll bet,'' Ginny smiled at him, ''It's so peaceful.''
They walked for a bit longer in silence, the youngest and the oldest Weasley children.
''Fancy coming in for a bit of dinner? And a shower?'' he asked eventually, turning to go back in.
The hot water poured over her body as she washed away the dirt, sweat and blood. The physical reminders that she had been involved in a war washed away. But the memories were still there. In her minds eyes she could still see the dead bodies lying on the tables of the Great Hall, could still hear the girl begging to go home as she slowly died. Had it been Harry who had snuck past her then? She would never know. She still saw Fred's dead body on the table as her mother sobbed over him. Harry's dead body in her arms. A sob escaped from her, the hole in her body reopening. She slid down the wall of the shower and sat, crying on the floor under the hot water. She didn't try to stem the tears, just let them flow.
She didn't know how long she stayed there, on the floor of the shower, but as the water cooled the tears slowed and the sobs subsided. Alone, she got up and turned the shower off, wrapping a towel around her thin frame. Her hip bones jutted out, all too prominent.
Once in the bed that Fleur had provided for her, she fell straight to sleep. Numbness had taken over her body again; she could once again not feel the pain in her body. And she welcomed it. Not feeling, she needed to not feel again. It was easier that way.
''Come on Ginny!'' Harry grabbed her hand, laughing. She jogged alongside him up the beach. The sun shone on them as they stripped out of their shorts and t-shirts, revealing swimming costumes, and jumped in the sea. They swam and played in the water. She laughed as he pretended to be pulled under by sharks.
They sat on the warm sand, eating sandwiches and drinking butterbeer. He rubbed sun cream all over her bikini clad body and she relished his touch. Inside she felt warm and safe with him. When he had finished applying the sun cream, he grabbed her sides tickling her. She wriggled beneath him, crying with laughter.
His face was right beside hers, his green eyes looking deep into her own. She reached up to kiss him. Their noses touched. So close to him now, she reached forward to press her lips against his, her eyes shutting.
Ginny woke with a start, her cheeks wet with silent tears.