Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.
A/N: Also just to remind the people how can't take a joke this is a parody, it's all a joke. :D
T for minor swearing
One shot
"Yo, sup dawg," Neville said as we walked into the Gryfiindor common room. "What's chilling home weasel'?" He continued as we paraded around with his pants literally hanging on the floor, a ton of necklaces with muggle dollar signs on and a hat on with some sort of gold sticker on it.
"Neville, is that you?" Harry asked as we walked up to him.
"fo shizzle my nizzle." He replied sticking up- well inappropriate hand gestures. "I'm trying out something new."
"Um, Neville you think you can well... erm get some clothes on?" Ron asked eyeing Neville's clothing.
"Do you want fries with that?" He asked as Neville who was now sitting- lying down on the couch.
"You better get dressed before Hermione gets here." Ron warned him. "She'll st-"
"EH, HOME DOG!" Neville screamed, as the Gryffindor common room burst open as a well rather 'gangster' looking girl walked in.
"Sup dawg." She shrugged off as she and Neville giving each other props, as they called it in a 'Turtle.'
"Um Neville who's this?"
"Dude." He began looking into our eyes with shock. "It's Granger you punks." He stated as Ron and Harry where in mental shock, as Hermione and Neville where heading out the door.
"Wait! Where are you guys going?" Harry asked.
"Jinx some people." Hermione replied casually.
"What about after that?"
"Eat Dinner." She added.
"Can we come?" Harry and Ron asked with stupid looking expressions.
...
"So did you hear Snape washed his hair?"
"Gosh, we have so much homework!" The wines and complains of the student's of Hogwarts filled the great Hall, just as the door open.
"Wait is that?"
"Could it be?"
"OMGF!"
Everyone cringed as Harry and Ron walked in with jeans on as they were low riding with their hair spiked up as Ron wore a shirt saying 'WAFFLES'. Right behind them where George and Fred who wore shirts of a cat with a pop tart body popping out rainbows on it, as Fred dyed his hair blue and George wore his in the colour pink. Right in front of all of them was Neville who was wearing the usual with Hermione a few steps away from him. Hermione's hair was strained painted black and had purple high lights and she wore a plain white fitted t-shit with black jeans with holes. As behind her was Ginny looking like her but in opposite colours, with Dobby standing behind her with eye liner on!
"SUP HOMIES MY NAMES MARY SUE!" Hermione declared as her gang backed her up.
"This is retarded." Malfoy hissed under his breath. "But for some apparent reason I feel like getting on my knees and worshiping her."
"WE'RE HERE TO RULE THIS DUMP!" Neville screamed across the room. "MY HOME WEASEL'S AND I ARE GOING TO TURN THIS DUMP INTO A POPSICLE STAND!" He added as everyone scanned each other's expressions. "WHO'S WITH ME?"
"DOBBY A FREE HOUSE ELF!"
"DAWWWWGG!" Someone screamed. "THIS IS MY CALLING! IT'S ME THE BLOODY HALF BLOOD PRINCE READY TO ROLL!" Someone exclaimed as we turned around to see Snape with his hair with an emo hair cut as he was dressed in black.
"DUUUUDDDDDDDDEEEEEE!" Neville screamed across the room. "I THOUGH YOU WHERE DEAD!"
"NO I'M ALIVE!" He laughed first pumping Neville. "IT'S ME THE HBP!"
"Sorry to interrupt this party but we have butterbeer to drink, homeboy" Harry started. "Right Ron?"
"Waffles."
"So we're off." Snape agreed.
"Snape," Dumbledore spoke up. "You can't just drop out of school like that!"
"Wanna come?" Snape asked as Dumbledore appeared wearing a tie dye shirt and his hair in a pony tail.
"He looks more like a hipster then a gangster." Ron whispered to Hermione.
"LAY YOUR FITHLY HANDS OFF MY BABE." Malfoy screamed.
"WORD!"
"Well this is awkward…."
"FOR SHIZZLE MY NIZZLE!"
"Well after that we're going planking, on the astrometry tower!" Neville added.
"Planking is so 2 mouth ago…" Dumbledore began. "WE SHOULD GO OWLING!"
"No no!" Ron argued. "CONING!"
"Shut up home weasels-" Harry began.
"YOU'RE ALL NOOBS!" Snape screamed. "LEARN FROM THE MASTER!"
"Of picking his nose?"
"NO! JUST FOLLOW MY LEAD!"
"Kay Dawg…"
"Could have had it all, Rolling in the deep, you had my heart inside of your hands, but you played it with a beating." Snape sang.
"Now what kind of punk is he?" Neville asked as Luna approached us.
"I knew that I shouldn't have eaten so many pies last night…" She muttered.
'Yo, should we help her?"
"SUP LOVEGOOD-" Harry began.
"Nah." Ginny reassured him. "Let's ditch this dump."
"HELL YEAH!"
"CHILDREN THIS IS A SCANDLE!" Slughorn roared.
"NO IT ISN'T!" Neville defended himself. "MY BLOODY GANG AND I ARE GOING TO ROCK THIS CLUB LIKE ITS GRENADE!"
"I SECOND THAT!" Ron added.
"EVERYONE'S WHO'S ANYONE IS IN OUR GANG!" Hermione roared.
"DDDDUUUUHHHHHH!"
"I'm here for the party people!" Someone added.
"My scar!" Harry screamed as he rolled on the floor in agony.
"Be quite people." Tom snapped. "IT'S ME VOLDEMORT!" He laughed evilly as everyone stood in silence. "IT'S ME VOLDEMORT!" He repeated as everyone kept on being quite. "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD WHERE ARE MY SOUND AFFECTS! WORMTAIL!"
"Sorry my homie, little sister from another mister." Wormtail spoke out.
"IT'S ME VOLDEMORT!" Tom screamed once again.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
"OOMMGG!"
"RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"
"That's much better." Tom crackled. "I heard you midgets are running a club."
"Yeah Sherlock." Neville said.
"Well I want to join."
"NO WAY!" Harry screamed.
"WORD!"
"Alright chill dawg, you can join." Neville agreed. "We're getting some Butterbeer wanna come?"
"FOR SHIZZLE MY NIZZLE!"
…
The next Day.
"Well that was quite exciting." Harry laughed as they sat down in the common room.
"Yeah, who would have thought Neville had it in him?" Ron added.
"Where is Neville anyways?"
"YO PARTY PEOPLE?" Neville screamed as he had a huge afro and clothes from the 70's. "Where's the disco?"
A/N: Well thanks for reading, I got this idea a long time ago and well I wrote it out. If you haven't read at the top this is a parody: D Anyways, Please Review I would want to know what you think. ;)
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