Why not to get Allen drunk Chapter 1, a d.gray-man fanfic

A/N: Got this idea while I was reading stories.

Full summary: Three new finders and one exorcist joins the order. The wierd thing is that the exorcist is the daughter of two of the finders, and the third one is supposed to be dead. Their celebration party goes kind of wrong, when Allen, gets drunk. And a drunk Allen is NOT good. So follow our favorite exorcist as he goes through drunkenness, hangovers, stalker Noah's, possessive boyfriends, supposedly dead family and lots more.

Warnings: Yaoi, drunk Allen,

If i did own dgm, why didn't this happen?

"And with that, I can welcome you to the Black Order. A welcome party has been set up in the cafeteria, now if you would follow me." Komui raised from his desk and walked out the door of his office with the four new members after him. Halfway to the cafeteria, a psychotic laughter filled the halls. "Oh god... Not again..." He sighed and reached up to rub his temples. "Don't worry. Allen just got drunk again." One of the finders halted. "What is his full name?" Komui stopped, as did the other new members of the order. "Allen? His full name is Allen Walker. Why do you... Oh." A smile broke out on the mans lips. "What are we waiting for? lets go!"

Komui came to a stop outside two giant doors. "this is the cafeteria. Now, whatever you may see in here... Is not our fault." Sucking in a deep breath, he opened the doors.

Only to have the group sweatdrop at the sight inside. About half of the order was in their underwear, sitting in a circle. The only one not to have lost anything was a boy no older than fourteen with white hair, silver eyes and a dark smile on his face. He broke into a more cheerful one once he saw Komui. "Komui~ Look! Lavi invited me to play poker!" The naked finders glared at said teen. He held his hands up in defence. "Hey, I didn't think he would be this good drunk." A dark chuckle came from the boy. "I never loose in gambling."

Their new exorcist only puffed. "Oh really? You don't think its just because they let you win? Or maybe they suck so much that even you could beat them? I bet you can't win against me once!" Komui gave a nervous chuckle. "I wouldn't do that." The girl only snorted. Allen? He only smiled in that creepy way of his...

Half an hour later, Allen was still victorious. "Another go?" he was humming to himself and swaying slightly. The girl was furious. He had beaten her at poker. Her! "You're cheating! I know it!" He smiled innocently. "So? If I didn't cheat in poker when i was young, I would have died! Why go different now?" A girl of no older than seventeen came up to her. "Don't worry. He usually allows you to win once or twice, but he's drunk, so yeah..." The new ones mother reacted at this. "Drunk? He can't be older than fourteen! Why is he allowed to drink?" Komui spoke up. "Actually, we don't really know how old he is, but he should be around seventeen now." "Yup~!" Allen was now giggling and swaying.

Mana didn't know what to think. His son had changed so much... He had to admit he was proud of his son for a moment when he saw he was victorious over so many. Shocked and angry when he heard he had to depend on cheating and gambling to stay alive, and pissed for a second or two when he heard his son was drunk. Said boy had made to stand on a little scene. Cheering erupted when the others saw him. "He is also is one hell of a singer." again, the new exorcist just puffed. "Oh really? I bet you havent even heard real music!" By now, they had all learned to ignore her. THe four new ones jumped when a strange sound came from nowhere. "Ah, that's just one of the many side effects of the Ark."

Everyone in the room had began clapping their hands to the beat by now.

"I hope you hang yourself with your H&M scarf
While jacking off listening to Mozart
You bitch and moan about L.A.
Wishing you were in the rain reading Hemingway

You don't eat meat and drive electrical cars
You're so indie rock it's almost an art
You need SPF45
Just to stay alive"

The family was surprised, not only because of the contents, but also because Allen had such a good voice. Even while drunk!

Mana had a proud look on his face. His son truly was amazing. Ooh, he really wanted to know him better, but all in time.

"You're so sad maybe you should buy a happy meal
You're so skinny you should really super size the deal
Secretly you you're so amused
And nobody understands you
I'm so mean cuz cannot get you out of your head
I'm so angry cuz you'd rather MySpace instead
I can't believe I fell in love
With someone that wears more make up and"

Lenalee groaned, she hated when Allen got drunk and started singing those strange songs. Just what the hell was MySpace anyway?

Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh
La, la, la
La, la, la
Oh, oh, oh
Do, do, do, do, bop, bop, bow
Do, do, do, bop, bop. day
You're so gay, you're so gay"

Ok, now Mana wasn't smiling so much anymore. Just what the bloody hell was his son singing?

"You walking around like you're oh so debonair
You pull them down and there's really nothing there
I wish you would just be real with me"

Kanda was smiling, knowing just where the hell Allen got this song from. Oh, poor, poor Cross and Tyki...

"You're so gay and you don't even like boys
No you don't even like, no you don't even like, no you don't even like boys
You're so gay and you don't even like boys
No you don't even like, no you don't even like, no you don't even like
You're so gay and you don't even like boys
No you don't even like, no you don't even like, no you don't even like
No you don't even like, no you don't even like, no, no, no, no, no, no you don't like PENIS!"

And with that, the white-haired teen, fainted. A teen with long, dark hair of Japanese origins came up and picked him up. "What'cha all staring at? Go back to getting drunk!"

A/N: I'm Sorry! Please don't kill me. I know i havent updated my other stories in like forever, but this was bugging me and I couldn't sleep and now it's about two in the morning. Just had to put that song there. I don't own that either. And yes, the new exorcist is a bitch. haha, so fitting for Allen to just faint at the end. Ahhh... I will be back with my other stories, I promise! but for now, enjoy this! And stay awesome!

Hellie clowny