Disclaimers:
Neon Genesis Evangelion and all related characters, concepts, etc., are property of ADVision and Gainax. I only wish they were mine.
Draw Me Close
by
dennisud
Prologue: Aftermath
Set after the sixteenth Angel, Rei-II's destruction of Unit-00, after Asuka is found in the tub, and Shinji & Misato had their tour of Terminal Dogma in which both find out about Rei Ayanami's origins.
As the remnants of Unit-00 and it burnt entry plug are examined; Ritsuko Akagi, head of Project-E, reaches into her coat pocket and presses a button on a hidden pad. That simple action activates the process by which the next 'Rei' will be awakened.
Later that day after Commander Ikari lifts one of several hundred Rei clones out of the LCL tank they were in, Ritsuko downloads the useful memories from the previous Rei into it. It's at this time that a disenchanted Ritsuko finally understands what Gendo had done to her... and her mother. Being taken in by the Commander and later becoming his lover was the first form of caring that she had experienced, other than her friendships with Kaji and Misato. She and her mother were never close.
But Ritsuko was a much a pawn as Rei and Nerv itself to Gendo's plans, so she came up with a simple scheme to get back at the bastard king.
With the third Rei, he had instructed her to dump into the clone only useful information to enhance his scenario. 'Well, why not dump ALL the memories of both previous Rei's. So that the third would not only start to question her role in the events to come, but would hopefully see Gendo for what he truly is.' Ritsuko surmised in thought.
So, Ritsuko returned the Rei clone Gendo had selected and took one she kept separate from the rest. One that Commander Ikari knew nothing about.
This one had a different physical make-up from the others, as this one had a full set of reproductive organs, thereby nullifying the clones ultimate use. In addition to that, this clone had only a small percentage of Angelic DNA. In fact it was a clone of two humans, 2 from Yui Ikari, and 95 from her own mother. To Dr. Akagi that was just perfect. She smiled and went to work.
Naoko's daughter had hated Rei and her clones because of the doll like obedience Gendo had put in them, as well as his unusual attention he gave her. But by choosing this one clone, it would be a great form of revenge and hopefully will coincide with her plans as well. A cynical smile decorated the brilliant scientist as she went to work.
Two hours later, the third Rei finally awoke and instantly relived her previous incarnation's memories. As the third mentally waded through them,she grew to understand her purpose, and her treatment at the hands of Gendo Ikari. Rei also seemed to understand Dr. Akagi's motives as well. She'll have to keep her guard up with her. Finally Rei remembered all of the personnel she worked with and was indifferent to most except one, … Shinji Ikari.
So it was a different Rei, not only physically, but mentally who woke up and was put in the hospital with her fake bandages to propagate the lie the Commander had so forcefully set. It was unfortunate that her memories hadn't taken hold fully when Shinji had come to visit her. Only later on did Rei realize what had happened, and an emotional urge to see Shinji had begun to slowly well within her.
Then later on in the week, Asuka was found in a tub of a semi-destroyed home which was later identified as that of her friend Hikari Horaki. Asuka had attempted to commit suicide, but was now lying in a self induced coma at Nerv's hospital. Through all this the 'new' Rei had resumed her duties as though nothing had happened, but now with all her memories intact, and a new personal purpose.
After the disastrous meeting at the hospital Shinji is avoiding Rei due to the facts he had learned later on in Ritsuko's tour of Terminal Dogma. The Third Child still grieved for the Rei who had died, but Shinji now believed that the current Rei walking around now wasn't the same one. This Rei didn't kill herself to save Shinji from being invaded by the sixteenth Angel. His guilt and fear keeps him away from Rei now. Yet he still stole glances at her many times when they were together.
Rei on the other hand, does have the memories of her previous selves, which she now cherished. Through all the good and bad, she remembered above all others how Shinji had shown her his caring, and kindness to her. She also reviewed the memories and realized the manipulation of her by the Commander, not only of herself, but of the others, Dr. Akagi, Agent Kaji, Major Katsuragi, and the others just to complete his precious scenario. The First Child growled inwardly, her mind finally made up about the Commander … as well as his son. Rei resolved to find Shinji as she begins her journey to find the now elusive pilot.
Chapter 1: Awakenings
Ayanami happens to pass a Christian church,a rare site in Tokyo-3, but one of the few religious centers still open in the devastated city, and hears the small vocal congregation within sing a song. 'What is that? What are they singing?' Rei wondered. The songs words seem to draw her in as she quietly entered the church and stood at the back of the congregation. Seeing that they all had hymnbooks, she proceeded to pick one up and eventually found the page the song they sang was on.
Rei, silently observed them singing as she followed along, memorizing the lyrics as they sang. Then, as quietly as she entered she left. The song, she found out was, "Draw Me Close" by Kelly Carpenter, a modern gospel song which was written before Second Impact. 'I've memorized the lyrics now and find the song itself.' She decided. Rei kept repeating the song's words in her head and understood it to be a song of friendship and caring. 'Like I care for…' she smiled nodding silently, then decided to act on a song inspired idea.
She still had some doubt as to why she was having not only these ideas come to her mind but experiencing the emotions associated with them, curiosity, anger, warmth, embarrassment. Rei had never experienced them in her previous incarnations, so she was having a hard time adjusting. But the Second Rei's memories seemed to help clarify them.
Rei understood that it was a religious song that doesn't say anything about a God, or Godlike being. But emphasized the idea of just wanting to be close to someone. Rei listened to the song again in her mind, slowly understanding what the words really meant to say to her, and for whom. Then, an idea is formed. Something she wouldn't have cared or wanted to do had those old memories not been present.
Rei then used her cell phone and locates one of the last music stories still open was nearby.
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She arrives a few moments later at the store, then she asks "Where are the religious songs?" The clerk tells her where to find that type of music and she begins to look. After a few minutes she finds the lyrics and the song she wants. Rei pays for the items and then heads to Nerv. There she transfer's the song from the CD to an SDAT tape, then takes a portable stereo with an SDAT player built in and heads to her room within Nerv as her old apartment complex was destroyed with the Unit-00 explosion.
The next day she uses her Nerv clearance to find, through Section-2, Shinji's location. The first Child finds the Third Child at the overlook they both had sat on with Asuka after the tenth angel's attack. She nodded to herself the probable reasons behind his choice of a place of contemplation.
After a few minutes of observation Rei quietly proceeds to where Shinji was and sits next to him, he is obviously startled, jumping a few feet up and back in surprise. A nervous look in his eyes as to whom had scared him. Then after holding his chest with his hand, calming down he asks
"Ayanami, why are you here? He asks her in a nervous way.
"I had to find you Ikari-kun... to apologize." Rei said this in almost a whisper and with her head down so as not to look into his eyes.
"For what?" Shinji said in a confused manner. He did however welcome the contact though he was still convinced she wasn't his friend Rei.
"For the way I acted... at the hospital." Rei said in her usual monotone voice, but she was a little flushed on her cheeks and even with her head down, Shinji noticed that. Rei Ayanami then does something uncharacteristic. She pulls out all the items methodically from the bag she was carrying and slowly moves her left had to his right. Rei takes his hand in hers and slowly leans to the side of his head to say almost in a whisper. "I am also apologizing for how I have acted towards you since I have met you."
"Since ... you met me?" He says in a confused manner. Did she mean since the incident at the hospital, or … before that? Shinji was nervous, 'maybe just maybe…'he hoped.
The First child draws back to face him looks intently at him, and nods silently.
Then he thinks of how she had acted at first, not allowing him to be close, while he was trying to be friends. For this he blames his father and how she was brought up. And for making her forget the facts of her origin.
"My father brought you up to be so detached and cold, but I saw that you needed a friend. Damn him!" He slammed his open hand to the ground. Rei simply stares at him at first.
But Rei's finger moved to his lips stopping him "I have all my memories … from before," The implication was clear to Shinji. "And so I will not be following what the Commander wants of me."
"But, but ... what if he makes you do something you don't want to do, or there's a danger to the city, to us?" Shinji rambles on without thinking. Shinji was ringing his hands, his mind was confused and a bit scrambled at her actions.
Rei sighs then shakes her head. "As you know of my origins, I also know of some of the plans the Commander wants to initiate with myself being an integral part in those plans." She looked sternly at him, "I will not be his doll, nor follow his plans from now on." She squeezed Shinji's hand to emphasize this.
Shinji looks stupefied, 'Rei was making her own decisions, and these decisions would conflict with what my father wanted.' He thought. 'Does this mean that…'
Then Rei waiting for Shinji to look at her again she said, "But, I will help and protect those who I consider my friends." Rei looks intently at Shinji.
"Really?" A surprised Shinji said. Rei nods and a small smile is now present on her face. The same smile Shinji saw after he Fifth Angel. Rei then takes the portable SDAT player and hits the play button and the song; "Draw Me Close" starts to play. She then whispers the lyrics to the song into Shinji's ear as it plays while moving closer, leaning her head on his shoulder.
Actions of the pilots during the song
(Draw Me close; by Kelly Carpenter)
Draw me close to you
Never let me go
I lay it all down again
To hear You say that I'm Your friend Shinji slowly puts his arm around Rei's shoulder, drawing her closer to him
You are my desire
No one else will do
'Cause nothing else could take your place Shinji lays his head on hers, and both close their eyes oblivious to the rest of the world
To feel the warmth of your embrace
You helped me find the way
Bringing me back to you
CHORUS:
You're all I want
You're all I've ever needed
You're all I want
Help me know you are near Shinji squeezes her, she kneads her head into his shoulder. Their actions speaking louder than any words.
Draw me close to you
Never let me go
I lay it all down again
To hear You say that I'm Your friend They both smile snuggling some more
You are my desire
No one else will do
'Cause nothing else could take your place
To feel the warmth of your embrace
You helped me find the way
Bringing me back to you They entwine their hands together as the suns starts to set and the lights of what remained of the city slowly becomes brighter.
CHORUS:
You're all I want
You're all I've ever needed
You're all I want
Help me know you are near They squeeze each other one more time.
After the song ends...
'Silence'
There was almost no sounds coming to their ears except their own heartbeats. They reveled in their physical, as well as their emotional contact; Both never wanted this to end.
After a good two minutes, both teens lock their eyes on each other Then ... hesitantly, Shinji draws Rei to him, into a warm full embrace. As the songs' lyrics say. Shinji says with a smile, "Don't worry Rei, I'll never let you go." She simply sinks into him holding him that much tighter.
Both now hold each other tightly reveling in the comfort they give each other.
They sit, now awaiting the sunset's end and stay that way intertwined for close to an hour after dusk.
No words are exchanged, as both seem to communicate with out them.
Finally, after the last light of sunset, Shinji lets Rei go. But immediately takes her hand to help her up.
They brush off the grass from their clothes and head back quietly down to the broken city holding hands with small but clear smiles evident on their faces. Nothing was said … nothing needed to be.
As they left another figure comes out of the foliage that surrounded the overhang. The figure says in a soft voice. "It seems that the plan has changed." the figure then gives a warm smile observing the two figures slowly walk back down towards the city. He slowly follows then at a distance. Then the person steps under a street light.
One Kowaru Nagisa then stuffs his hands in his pockets with that same smile still on his face and starts to walk towards the city in a different direction that leads to the Geo-front. He speaks out loud to no one in particular. "Maybe I should talk to The Commander … and then Chairman Kiel." he surmised. Maybe they'll have to have a change of heart?" Then Kowaru chuckled at what that type of persuasion he may have to use on them. As he whistle, Beethoven's "Air In D-Major" he heads to the Commander's office, then makes plans later on to go to the Chairman of SEELE Oh was visiting Tokyo-2 for a little talk. While this is happening, a couple of teen's head to Shinji's home with a new sense of love and hope not just for each other but for the future they hope to influence and share in. All is right with the world, at least with these two children.
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This is a little one shot to all the Shinji/Rei fans to keep you guys content as I'm still working on my other stories as they're Shinji/Asuka stories. But don't fret another Shinji/Rei saga will come in the fall. So be patient and have a great summer,
dennisud
P.S.- Well enough have asked and I have listened. This story will go on for a few more chapters soon, so stay tuned and we'll see if Kowaru is … persuasive, and what will happen next for Rei and Shinji?
So stay tuned!