Saga of the Grey Wardens

Author's Notes: Yes, this is a retelling, slightly AU. Some of my inspiration comes from Hajime Kanzaka's Slayers novels. I am also aware that my Warden, Cassiel, shares his name with an archangel, but I actually named him after a character in Kenneth Oppel's Silverwing series.

Felix Cousland belongs to my friend Substitute Deathberry, and I am using him with her permission.

Warning: Later chapters contain slash.

Call for us

The power in all of us

So far beyond the blackened sky tonight

Glorious

Forever more in us

We are victorious

And so alive

~ DragonForce, Heroes of Our Time

Chapter 1: The Harrowing

The Chantry says that the magisters of the Tevinter Imperium became the first darkspawn when they opened a portal to the Golden City. The Maker created it for us mortals to enter when we die, but after the mages' intrusion there was no Heaven for us. In other words, they were corrupted by their own arrogance, twisted and damned to the point of becoming monsters.

I don't know if any of that's true, but it would explain a lot about why the Chantry treats mages the way it does. It claims that magic is a curse, and unfortunately some mages actually believe that as well. For centuries we have been closely watched, trained in the Circles of Magi that exist across the world. All children showing signs of magic abilities are taken to these Circles, and I was no different, even though I'm an elf. Of course, elven mages aren't unheard of; they're merely uncommon.

Originally I came from Denerim, the capital of Ferelden. When I was about five or six I was taken from my home and placed in the Circle Tower at Lake Calenhad. I have few memories of my life in the city, so I guess you could say that the Circle is the only life I've ever really known. But still, I always felt like a prisoner, especially while I was still an apprentice.

That, however, changed one day when I was called for my final test in becoming an official Circle mage, shortly after my twenty-fifth birthday. It's called the Harrowing, a secret rite that apprentices go through without warning. How nice of them not to tell us about it beforehand.

Let me go into a little more detail. The mages of the Circle are kept under watch by the Templar Order, a branch of the Chantry that handles mages who have gone corrupt. I have the honor of being personally acquainted with Greagoir, the Knight-Commander of the templars at Lake Calenhad. He's not one to trust mages, but I don't think he's a bad person.

I stood in the Harrowing Chamber, listening to Greagoir. Also present was First Enchanter Irving, a man whom I greatly respect. He always saw promise in me, so I was determined not to disappoint him.

"Magic exists to serve man," Greagoir was saying, "and never to rule over him." He looked at me as he spoke, as if trying to make a point. "Thus spoke the prophet Andraste as she cast down the Tevinter Imperium, ruled by mages who had brought the world to the edge of ruin." He began to pace, as he had been doing before. "Your magic is a gift, but it is also a curse."

Tell me something I haven't already heard, I thought as I watched him.

"For demons of the dream realm, the Fade," he continued, motioning toward a nearby pedestal, "are drawn to you, and seek to use you as a gateway into this world."

Finally, he stopped, and Irving spoke up, much to my relief. "This is why the Harrowing exists, Cassiel," he said. "The ritual sends you into the Fade, and there you will face a demon, armed with only your will."

That sounds fun, I thought sarcastically. I straightened myself and looked him in the eye. "I'm ready. Let's get this over with."

"Know this, apprentice," said Greagoir.

I wish he'd call me by my name.

"If you fail, we templars will perform our duty." He paused for about a second, as if to let that sink in. "You will die."

I said nothing. Irving pointed toward the pedestal, where there was a faint, misty light. I knew instantly what it was: lyrium, the very essence of magic. Mages often use it to restore their mana, allowing them to cast more spells.

"The lyrium is your gateway into the Fade," Irving said. "The Harrowing is secret out of necessity; every mage must go through this trial by fire. As I have succeeded, so shall you, child."

Irving calls me that out of affection, even though I am no longer a child. I suppose he sees me as one compared to him.

"Keep your wits about you," Irving continued, "and remember the Fade is a realm of dreams. The spirits may rule it, but your will is real."

"He must go through this test alone, First Enchanter," Greagoir reminded him. He turned to me. "You said you are ready, did you not?"

I merely nodded. Without further words I approached the pedestal. As Irving and the templars looked on, I reached out my hand and touched the lyrium. There was a bright flash of light, as if the lyrium itself was exploding into the air around me.

Only mages can enter the Fade in such a manner. It's a strange sensation, like your very essence is being ripped from your earthly body as you pass through the Veil. Normally a person enters the Fade when they sleep or die, hence why it's called a realm of dreams.

The next thing I knew, I was a spirit within the Fade, a strange, surreal realm vastly different from the mortal world. In the distance I could see a city, no doubt the Black City, what remained of the Golden City. As I paused to get my bearings, a thought occurred to me that I might be able to see it up close, but I had no such luck. I could see no way to reach it.

Taking a deep breath, I started along the path before me. About a minute passed before I noticed something up ahead. It looked like an orb of light, seemingly harmless, but my instincts realized it was hostile, a second before it attacked. I figured it was a wisp wraith, a demon who had lost its power. It began to spark with electricity, which then burst from its form straight toward me. Thinking quickly, I activated a spell of my own, countering with a sphere of energy simply known as Arcane Bolt. It's a fairly weak spell, but it works against weaker foes.

The enemy's own bolt struck, but I felt little pain. Of course, any pain I felt was not real, but I didn't have time to ponder that. The wisp was still active, and I quickly sent forth another Arcane Bolt, destroying it before it had a chance to attack again. I felt no sense of accomplishment in my victory; I might have had it been a stronger opponent.

Idly wishing I had a staff in my possession, I continued along my way, defeating another wisp in the process. Not long after the second encounter I noticed something up ahead, and at first I assumed it was another foe. As I moved closer, I noticed that the being had the form of a mouse, if a particularly large one. I didn't relax my guard even for a moment.

"Someone else thrown to the wolves," the mouse said, watching me. "As fresh and unprepared as ever."

I wasn't surprised. The Fade was full of deception, after all.

"It isn't right that the templars do this," the rodent continued, "not to anyone."

"Who are you?" I asked. "Another apprentice?"

"You're in the same boat I was, aren't you?" he murmured, apparently ignoring my questions. With a flash of light he transformed, taking on a human form. He looked to be slightly older than me, but he wore the robes of a senior enchanter, as opposed to the apprentice robes that I had. "Allow me to welcome you to the Fade," he said. "You can call me…well, Mouse, I suppose."

How creative.

I knew, of course, that Mouse wasn't his real name, but I didn't ask about it. There was a good chance that he didn't remember his true identity; I have heard of such things happening to mortals who stay in the Fade for too long.

"And you can call me Cassiel," I replied. "I wasn't aware that those in the Fade could change their forms."

"Here, you are what you perceive yourself to be." He gestured to me. "Do you believe that's your true form? You only look like that because you think you do." He made a quiet, thoughtful sound in his throat as he looked me over. "I think I used to be like you. An apprentice mage, I mean. The templars kill you if you take too long, you see; they figure you failed, and they don't want something getting out."

"Like a demon?" I asked.

Mouse nodded, but didn't answer the question. "That's what they did to me, I think—killed me. I have no body to reclaim. And you don't have much time before you end up the same."

I folded my arms. I wasn't about to trust him; at least, not entirely. He could have been a demon who intended to use me to escape the Fade; his robes contradicted his story. Nonetheless, I decided I didn't have much of a choice, so I went along with him. "What do I do, then?"

"There's something here, contained," he said, "just for an apprentice like you. You have to face the creature, a demon, and resist it, if you can." He pointed at me for emphasis. "That's your way out."

"Fascinating," I said simply. There was a short pause between us, then I asked, "Why pit me against such a creature?"

"That's a question for those in the tower." Mouse shrugged. "Maybe you'll be lucky enough to ask."

"I'm sure," I murmured.

"There are others here," he said, "other spirits. They can tell you more, if you can believe anything you see."

"I'll keep that in mind." I glanced at the path ahead of me. "I need to go. I've wasted enough time here."

"Allow me to follow," Mouse insisted. "You may have a way out."

I turned back to him, considering his request. "If you like. I'd be grateful for the company, actually."

No more words were exchanged between us as he returned to his rodent form. I watched him for a short moment before heading up the path. Along the way we encountered more wisp wraiths, but a few Arcane Bolts handled them easily. As I dispatched the last one, I noticed something else nearby: another spirit, of course, but a more powerful one. It took the form of a ghostly wolf, and did not hesitate in attacking.

I am one who is confident in my skills as a mage. At the same time, however, I know not to let my guard down. I immediately summoned the power of ice, casting a Winter's Grasp spell, which temporarily froze the spirit wolf. I watched in satisfaction as Mouse seized the opportunity to assist me, lunging upon the apparition and sinking into it with his teeth. As the beast unfroze, Mouse ducked back, and I released an Arcane Bolt to finish it off. It vanished with a small flash of light.

"Be cautious," Mouse advised. "There is another presence here—not the demon hunting you, but still be wary."

Shortly after that little warning, I took notice of a creature farther along the trail, which seemed to lead to a dead end. The beast appeared to be a bereskarn, a bear that had been affected by darkspawn. But it was the demon of which Mouse spoke, I knew—and the way it was lazing about I figured it was a sloth demon who had merely taken such a form. As we approached, he eyed us without much interest.

He made an almost thoughtful sound in its throat. "You are the one being hunted, yes?" it asked me. When I didn't respond, he continued, "And the small one—is he to be a snack for me?"

"I doubt it," I said. "He probably doesn't taste good."

Mouse ignored my comment as he reverted to his human shape. "I don't like this," he said. "I don't think he's going to help us. We should go."

"No matter," said the demon, idly shifting where he lay. "The demon will get you eventually. There may even be scraps left."

I snorted quietly. "If you're not going to help," I said, "then we'll be on our way."

"Nothing will help you."

"Then I'll just have to find my own way out, won't I?"

He shifted again. "Clearly you have better things to do than bother me, mortal. Begone; I tire of you already."

The feeling is mutual, I thought. And thank you for stating the obvious.

As I started to leave, Mouse apparently had an idea and reached out to give my sleeve a light tug. "He looks powerful," he said softly. "Perhaps he could teach you to be like him."

"Like me?" the demon said, overhearing him. "You mean teach the mortal to take this form? Why? Most mortals are too attached to their own forms to learn the change." He shifted his gaze to Mouse. "You, on the other hand, might be a better student. You let go of your human form years ago."

"I don't think I'd make a very good bear," Mouse protested. "How would I hide?"

"You're a mage, aren't you?" I asked. "Or you used to be, anyway. You'd find a way." I shook my head. "But hiding doesn't solve anything. You should face your fears."

"I have faced more in this place than you can imagine," he retorted, sounding a little aggressive. "Fear is just one more thing." He paused, then sighed. "But you are right." This time he sounded a bit apologetic. "Hiding doesn't solve anything. I'm sorry; the Fade changes you." He just looked at me for a moment before turning back to the demon. "I'll try to be a bear, if you'll teach me."

The demon yawned. "Teaching is so exhausting. Away with you now."

"I told you he wasn't going to help us," said Mouse.

"Teach him," I told the demon firmly. "It was you who suggested it in the first place."

"You wish to learn my form, little one?" the demon said. "Then I have a challenge for your friend: if he can answer three riddles correctly, then I will teach you. Fail, and I will devour you both."

I folded my arms. "I accept. I won't fail, I assure you."

Mouse said nothing.

"Very well." The demon sounded weary. That was not surprising. "Here is the first riddle: I have seas with no water, coasts with no sand, towns without people, mountains without land. What am I?"

"A map," I said quickly. I always was good at riddles.

"Correct," he said, as if disappointed. "Let's continue. The second riddle: I'm rarely touched, but often held. If you have wit, you'll use me well. What am I?"

"A tongue."

"Yes, a witty tongue." The demon yawned again. "And now the final riddle. Often will I spin a tale, never will a charge a fee, I'll amuse you an entire eve, but, alas, you won't remember me. What am I?"

An annoying riddler? I thought, but instead I answered, "A dream." This was too easy.

"You are correct," the demon said, sounding vaguely irritated. Then he continued, "You've proven yourself an amusing distraction, as well as winning my challenge." He turned his attention to Mouse as he finally stood, stretching slightly. "So, little one, I will teach you to take my form."

I paid little heed to them. I was not interested in shapeshifting, so the demon's lesson had little effect on me. In the end, I watched as Mouse transformed once more, but this time, the form he took was quite different. He looked like a normal black bear, not the bereskarn that the demon appeared to be.

"Like this?" he asked. "Am I a bear?"

"You are," I said. "A cute one, I might add."

"It feels heavy," he continued, ignoring my teasing comment.

"Close enough." The demon lay back down, making himself comfortable. To me, he said, "Go, then, and defeat your demon, or whatever it is you intend to do. I grow weary of you."

No more words were exchanged between us. I turned and headed back whence I came, and Mouse followed, padding along in his new form. We didn't get far before a trio of spirit wolves came charging at us. I unleashed a burst of fire from my hands in a spell called Flame Blast, engulfing one of the beasts in the blaze. Mouse fought off the other two with ease, using his size to overwhelm them. I focused on my own opponent, which bit into my arm. I winced, but quickly retaliated, letting loose with a Lightning spell from my opposite hand. The creature vanished in a puff of spirit mist.

We came to an area bordered by fire, where I clearly felt a demon's presence. I stopped momentarily, attempting to pinpoint its exact location. I found it in the center of the surrounding flames, and I approached without hesitation. The demon showed himself, emerging from the ground and taking the appearance of a fiery creature—a rage demon. Mouse again reverted to his human form and stood beside me.

"And so it comes to me at last," he said, sounding pleased with himself. "Soon I shall see the land of the living through your eyes, elf. You shall be mine, body and soul."

"Then come and get me," I challenged him, bracing myself for a fight.

"So this elf is your offering, Mouse?" the demon went on, turning his gaze to my companion. "Another plaything, as per our arrangement?"

I narrowed my eyes. It had occurred to me that Mouse was not what he appeared to be, and given the demon's reaction to him, I imagined that I was correct.

So Mouse lied to me, I thought. I knew it.

"I'm not offering you anything," Mouse retorted. "I don't have to help you anymore."

That's the way to tell him.

"And after all those wonderful meals we have shared," the demon said with mock disappointment. "Now suddenly the mouse has changed the rules?"

"Soon I won't have to hide," Mouse said. "I don't need to bargain with you."

"We shall see." The demon suddenly attacked, released a bolt of fire straight toward me and Mouse. Both of us leapt to the side, out of the way, and it hit the ground, where it burst into a fiery explosion.

I cast Winter's Grasp, temporarily freezing the demon in place. I was reluctant to touch him, knowing that my best chance to defeat him lay within my magic. As I prepared a Lightning spell, the demon broke free of the ice and continued his assault. Being a fire-based creature, he was weak to cold, and I knew that my Winter's Grasp spell had greatly weakened him. He prepared a counterattack, but I struck with my Lightning, and he went down. He faded into nothingness, and I no longer felt his presence.

"You did it!" Mouse said, sounding astonished. "You actually did it!" He shook his head in disbelief. "I thought you might be able to…but I never thought…"

"Why did you help me?" I asked him. "You were bargaining with the demon, weren't you? So why?"

"You made me believe in you." I thought I saw a vague hint of a smile. "You're a true mage, one of the few." He sighed. "The others never had a chance. The templars set them up to fail, like they tried with you."

That goes back to the Chantry disliking mages. I imagine some of the templars want to rid the world of them for good. I wanted to ask Mouse why they would want me to fail, but the answer seemed obvious.

"I regret my part in it," he continued, "but you've shown me hope."

"What do you think you can get from me?" I demanded.

"You defeated the demon and completed your test. In time, you will be a master enchanter with no equal."

I'm known throughout the Circle as a genius when it comes to magic. I'm quick to learn even complicated spells; as an apprentice I was called Irving's star pupil. I have to wonder if Mouse saw more potential in me.

"Maybe," he said, "there's hope in that for someone as small and forgotten as me. There may be a way for me to leave here; you just have to let me in."

"The demon," I said flatly, "wasn't my real test, was he?"

"What?" Mouse looked puzzled. "What do you mean? Of course he was."

Of course, I didn't believe him. I felt my lips curl up into a snarl as I prepared to cast a spell.

"There's no need for that." Mouse smiled unpleasantly. "You are a smart one, Cassiel. The real danger of the Fade is careless trust." As he spoke, his voice changed to a demonic one. A white glow engulfed him as he rose into the air. He transformed one last time, taking the appearance of a creature I recognized as a pride demon. He disappeared, his voice ringing out.

"Keep your wits about you, mage. True tests never end."