Part one: Beers in the Afternoon

Bam heard the sound of his phone vibrating on the bathroom counter. Holding the eyeliner pencil to his eye, he frowned and glanced at his phone to see which of his dumbass friends had just sent him a text. Reading Jimmy's name on the screen, he laughed and picked up the phone. Jimmy's texts were always worth putting whatever he was doing on hold, he thought to himself as he dropped the eyeliner onto the counter. He opened the text and laughed as soon as he read it.

Bambi I'm bored as fuck and in need of a drinking buddy. What're you up to?

Bam glanced at his reflection to see his half done eyeliner. He grinned and replied to Jimmy.

Just doin my makeup like a fag. Dude it's 1 in the God damn afternoon. You really want to drink?

He sat the phone down and picked up his pencil again to work on his other eye. A few seconds later, his phone began to buzz again. He checked the evenness of his liner before picking up his phone to read the new text.

I told you I was bored as fuck. Now are you going drinking with me or not?

Bamlaughed and replied to Jimmy.

I'm on my way.

…

Jimmy stood right in front of the bar entrance, gazing into the parking lot. A Grinch smile spread across his face and he threw a fist into the air once he saw the purple Lamborghini speed into an empty space. The window was rolled down, allowing the loud, bassey hip-hop music to pour out onto the surrounding cars and asphalt. The music suddenly shut off, door swung open and Bam glided out of the car adjusting his dark sunglasses. He shoved his mix-matched gloved hands into the pockets of his purple velvet jacket and sauntered over to the entrance. Jimmy attempted to subdue his massive grin as he and Bam slickly slapped their hands together, but the grin remained intact.

Bam laughed, showing off his teeth. "What up motherfucker?" he leaned forward, slipping an arm around Jimmy's shoulders in a brief hug.

Stepping out of the hug with an equally bright laugh, Jimmy tucked some of his stray hair under his hat. "Nice seein' ya again Bambi." He placed his hand on the door. "Enough of this general chit-chat, Bam Bam, let's head inside to get our drink on."

Bam let a smirk curl his lips "Let's do it."

They entered the bar and scoped out a place to sit. Since it was in the middle of the afternoon on a Tuesday, there weren't many people around who might bother them. This also allowed them to claim the best seats in the bar for themselves. As soon as they sat in the booth, Jimmy ordered a pitcher for them. Bam watched for a moment as Jimmy smooth-talked the waitress, and laughed quietly to himself over the somewhat cheesy way Jimmy was flirting with her. The girl walked away, with both men craning their necks to follow the sway of her backside. Bam leaned into the back of the booth lazily draping his arms over top of it. When he looked at Jimmy, on the other side of the booth, he held the slightest bemused grin on his lips.

"So, Jimbo. What's the real reason you had me come out here?"

"What do you mean?" Jimmy snickered "I was bored and wanted to drink." He tilted his head with a slight smirk "Come on. You know I never have a bigger agenda than that."

Bam chuckled a little "Ok I shoulda known." He turned his eyes toward the bar and followed the waitress as she carried the pitcher and two glasses to their booth. "You knew I'd be the only one not only available but willing to drink in the afternoon with you." He grinned as the waitress as she sat the pitcher in the middle of the table. "So what's that say about us? We a couple of alkies or what?"

Jimmy gave the waitress the same flirtatious look from before. "Just start a tab Sweetheart." He watched the girl walk away before returning to Bam. "Alkie schmalkie. A couple drinks between friends ain't nothin'." He poured them each a glass of beer. "I'm not lookin' to get shitfaced since I do have stuff to do later. Just want a nice buzz goin'."

Bam took his glass and lifted it to his lips. "Fine by me."

As they began to drink, Jimmy leaned back into his side of the booth, mirroring Bam's position. Bam took a drink and sat the glass down in front of him. He looked at Jimmy, taking notice of his almost brooding stare. Feeling a slight discomfort, Bam slouched in his seat and glanced at the table to avoid the stare.

"Something wrong, Bam?" Jimmy asked, innocently

"Dude quit starin' at me like that."

"Like what?" Jimmy shrugged slightly "Alright Bam. I may have been staring at you. But come on. Are we at the beach in here? It's dark enough without needing sunglasses." He leaned forward a little "Take those things off and show me those pretty blues."

Bam couldn't help laughing despite the lingering traces of discomfort he felt. He reached up and touched his sunglasses, having forgotten he had them on. Gripping the stem a little he pulled the sunglasses off and tucked them into the collar of his shirt. Jimmy laughed brightly and clapped his hands.

Bam rolled his eyes "You fucker." He picked up his beer."

"Well I didn't think you'd actually listen to me!"

"It doesn't matter anyway." He took a drink "Can actually see better now." He chuckled, setting his glass down.

Jimmy picked up his glass and chugged the beer. Setting the glass down, he wiped his mouth and promptly refilled it. He turned his eyes up at Bam and grinned slightly. The look on his face, almost of a flirty nature, created an uncomfortable ping in Bam's stomach. He lifted his glass to his lips and glanced away, hoping that this feeling didn't read on his face. As he slowly sipped his beer, he heard Jimmy laugh.

"Bam relax. You're acting like you've never been out with me before."

"What do you mean?"

"Seriously, I never thought I'd be telling you, Bam motherfucking Margera to loosen up. We're here to relax, get good 'n buzzed on beer and you're acting like you're expecting to get caught any minute. You ain't on the lamb or something, are you?"

Bam snickered, rubbing his eyes. He brushed his hair back, smirking over his own awkwardness. "Yeah I guess I've just been stressed lately." He loosened his shoulders and slouched a little in his seat, allowing himself to fully relax. Lifting his glass again, he then tossed his head back, chugging all the liquid from it. He slammed the glass down in front of him and reached across the table for the pitcher with a small laugh.

"I think I needed this, Jimbo." He said, refilling his glass. "Glad you got a hold of me."

Jimmy laughed and lifted his glass. "Well that's more like it!" he clinked their glasses together for a toast. "Let's drink!"

They both laughed before tossing their heads back to consume all the beer in their glasses at once. Jimmy took the pitcher and filled their glasses again. Then, with the empty pitcher, he walked up to the bar for a refill. Bam watched him walk away before turning his attention onto a couple girls at the bar. Attempting to get their attention by smirking with a seductive wink, he accidentally caught Jimmy with the wink right as he turned around with the full pitcher and four shots in his hands. Jimmy tilted his head, curious and slightly intrigued. Then he laughed once he realized he was not the one the wink was intended for. He sat back down, placing the pitcher in the middle of the table and set two shots in front of each of them.

"You sly devil you." He said, still with a slight laugh "I'll have you know, it's going to take an awful lot more than a smile and wink to get into my pants."

Bam laughed, despite his slightly shocked and disgusted expression. "Ew! Dude I'd have to be beyond shitfaced wasted before I'd start flirting with you."

"Aw come on. I'm not that ugly." Jimmy laughed before scooting two shots closer to Bam. "In that case, keep drinkin', Bambi. I wanna see how long this takes before you start hittin' on me."

"Dude! Are you fucking serious?" Bam asked, picking up a shot "You actually want me to hit on you?"

"I'm just messin' with ya." he picked up one of his own shots and held it to his hips. Before downing the shot, he grinned "Hell, get me drunk enough and I might start hittin' on you hot stuff." He laughed and tossed the shot down his throat.

Cringing with a shake of his head, he then wiped the inside of the shot glass with his finger. He sucked the remaining alcohol off his finger, making sure to make it appear as gross and sexual as possible. Watching this, right as he finished pouring the shot into his own mouth, Bam nearly choked on the alcohol. He forced himself to keep from spraying the alcohol out with a laugh, not wanting to waste a single drop. Once he recovered, he sat the glass down and let out an obnoxious laugh. He slid the second of Jimmy's two shots closer to him and picked up his second, quietly signaling him to drink. With a smile, Jimmy picked up the shot glass, and they clinked them together before downing the shots at the same time.

…

A couple hours and a bunch more drinks later, it was clear that their intentions of getting a good buzz going had long since been abandoned. At this point, their simple afternoon buzz had quickly become a near annihilated level of drunk for both men.

Leaving the bathroom they stumbled about, drunkenly leaning on each other in a pathetic attempt to hold each other up and guide themselves back to the table from the bathroom. Once back at the table, they both fell over each other, laughing obnoxiously into one side of the booth. Bam fell against Jimmy, laughing and wiping his eyes. He placed an arm on Jimmy's shoulder, failing to help himself into seated position. Jimmy needed to sling an arm around Bam's shoulder in order to prop himself up. He looked at Bam, still with traces of his laughter on his face. He then looked at the other side of the booth.

"Hey Bam Bam what're you doing on my side?" He asked through a slight slur

Bam looked at the other side of the booth where his jacket was lazily draped, and then looked at Jimmy with false innocents. "Oops." He laughed and slid up into a straighter position. He waved a dismissal hand over the table. "Ah fuck it. It'll still be there later."

"Well at least scoot over so my fat ass has room."

Bam slid over and reached for his half finished beer. He looked at Jimmy before taking a big swig to finish it. Slamming the glass down on the table, he then let out a loud, obnoxious belch.

"You feel better now?" Jimmy snickered, picking up his own beer.

"So Jimbo." Bam started, ignoring Jimmy's question. "While we were in the bathroom pissin'," He leaned in closer to Jimmy, placing a hand on his arm. "Didja take a peek?"

Jimmy blinked in surprise and tried to cover it up with an awkward laugh "Did I what?"

"Did you take a peek at my dick?"

Jimmy felt his cheeks flush, making it harder for him to keep his cool. "No I di-" He giggled "Yeah I did." He leaned forward a little, slapping the tabletop in his fit of giggles.

At first, he didn't notice that Bam had joined him, until he felt Bam lean against him with an arm around his shoulders. Once they recovered and sat back up, Bam looked at him seriously.

"Good. Now I don't feel weird about peeking at yours."

"Well I have to break it to you, Bambi. You weren't very subtle when you did it." Jimmy finished with a snicker, watching Bam's face redden.

Trying to shake off his embarrassment, he let out a nervous laugh. Then, pulling Jimmy closer to him, he licked the side of his face. Jimmy grimaced, inching away from him. He wiped his face and then smeared the saliva onto Bam's face. After which, in retaliation, he licked Bam's face with even more vigor and wetness. Bam whipped his head away, grossed out.

"Ew dude!" He stuck two fingers up his nose, pulling out two big boogers to wipe on Jimmy's neck. "What now?" He laughed

Unfazed, Jimmy smiled at him. Without saying anything, he grabbed the side of Bam's face and pulled him into a deep tongued kiss. Bam pulled away in surprise and blinked at him to be sure of what just happened. A small grin fell upon his lips as Jimmy started laughing.

"Oh that's how you're playin' it."

Jimmy nodded his head "That's how I'm playin' it."

Bam leaned in with a smirk and placed a hand on the back of Jimmy's head. He then placed his other hand on Jimmy's shoulder and brought him in closer for another kiss. As first, the kiss was meant to be humorous to rival the one Jimmy gave him. Both men moved deeper into the kiss, making it smoother and more sensual. They pressed against each other, each wrapping their arms around the other. The kiss began to intensify and Jimmy leaned even more into Bam, causing him to slowly recline against the back of the booth. They knew eyes were on them but neither of them cared. In fact, having eyes on them only encouraged even more kisses from them. Bam pulled away for a breath and scooted even closer to Jimmy until he was practically in his lap. As the kissing resumed, they both melted completely into each other, causing more and more kisses.

After a few moments, they managed to break apart to catch some air. They looked at each other, flushed in the face before sheepishly looking around at everyone else. Jimmy suddenly took to his feet, raising his beer glass as he pointed at the other people.

"What's the matter? Haven't you ever seen two dudes make out in a bar before?" He laughed and chugged his beer.

Bam reached up and grabbed him by the shirt, tugging him down. "Come on dude, sit down."

Jimmy say back down and draped an arm around Bam's shoulders. "Aw come on Bambi. You embarrassed now? When have you ever been embarrassed by what you do in public?"

"I'm not embarrassed by what I did. I'm embarrassed by you, mother fucker!" He picked up his beer and finished it in one swig. "Come on, Jim, let's get outa here before we draw more attention to ourselves."

He stood up and went to the other side of the booth to retrieve his jacket and sunglasses. Watching him with a snicker, Jimmy slid out of the booth without protest. They then draped their arms around each other for support as they walked out of the bar.