Annie needed a vacation from her vacation. Joan had made her take a few days off work and it just happened to coincide with her sisters trip and, of course, an Iranian defector. Yahya had been a positive in all this getting to actually help someone in a tangible way. But it had still been an interesting few days dredging up memories of Ben and their time together. Getting out of things for a bit had also made her realize something she had subconsciously already known, Jai knew Ben. Wasn't that just the icing on the cake.
After burning Ben's note Annie made her way to the spot she used to think. The closed in court yard with the fountain. She needed to move on. Even if some how she and Ben got back together it would never be the same there was no way it could be. She had changed too much. and he was a different person then she thought he was. Besides she wasn't sure she would ever want to be with him again.
"Annie?' Joan asked from the door way. "Want some company?" Annie shrugged turning back to regard the fountain.. Taking that as a 'sure' or at least not a no, joan took a seat beside the golden blond.
"I'm sorry I had to spoil your vacation with a mission."
"It's okay I'm glad I could help him." Annie said.
"I'm glad you could too." Joan replied leaning slightly into the other woman.
"But Annie, next time I tell you to stay out of danger. Stay out."
"We're both fine."
"Yeah , this time"
"If I hadn't Yahya would be dead right now."
"And next time it might be you. Look Annie, I worry about you and I don't want anything bad to happen to you."
"Joan, I can't do this." Annie said turning away.
"Do what?"
"This, us." The golden blond replied. Joan raised an eyebrow waiting for her to continue.
"We aren't simple, we never were, we can't be. You're married and I'm your agent, your female agent. we can pretend all we want but we're living in a fantasy world and I can't do that again."
"Again? You mean Ben." It was a statement not a question. Annie nodded anyways.
"We were separated from the world in our own little paradise. but Joan as much as we may pretend to be separate, we aren't. We are right in the middle of everything."
"I never meant for it to go so far. At fist I was just testing you and having a little fun. I needed to find out what type of agent you were. But somewhere along the way it stopped being a game. Annie I do care about you." Joan said looking at the woman beside her. Annie reached over and took Joan's hand in hers starring at the joined fingers.
"I care for you too." She whispered "But I don't know if i can do this. It's not real."
"Some of it."
"So what do we do now."
"I think that's up to you. You know what the stakes are and what it means."
"And I have no idea." Annie said. Joan pulled the golden blond in to her, wrapping an arm around her back laying a soft kiss on her brow. They stayed like that for a few moments soaking in the comfort. Annie leaned up and firmly pressed her lips to Joan's. After a few moments she pulled back, not looking at the other woman she stood up and strode back into the DPD. She had to let go of Ben because he was never real. But could she hold onto Joan when what they had wasn't real, it would shatter if anyone found out. Her lips still tingling with the feel of lips pressed to hers, she hoped some how they could figure it out.