Disclaimer: I do not own Hunger Games.

A/N: So this is my first Hunger Games fic! I have been s excited to start writing it but I promised myself that I would finish one of my other stories first, and I did, I finished Forever Changed. I have definitely done my research reading countless HGs fics, and of course the books.

Oh and I'm not going along with the traditional present tense Hunger Games thing because all my other fics and the novel I'm working on are in past tense and I don't want to confuse myself or anything.

Note: Katniss and Peeta are both twenty-two in this fic. It's four years after the war.

I stood by the huge food table, nibbling on something that had chocolate in it. I had been going to these stupid Capitol parties for three years now, ever since the end of the war. Well actually that wasn't true, I went ever since my one year District Twelve arrest was over.

I didn't like the Capitol, I never would, but it was better than staying in District Twelve with the ghosts of everyone that I killed haunting me.

I had been kidding myself if I ever thought that things would get better after the rebellion. If anything it was worse. Prim, who I had started this all to protect was dead. My mother was working at the hospital here in the Capital, but I never talked to her anymore. Madge was dead. Finnick was dead, leaving Annie without the love of her life. Gale was working in District Two, we didn't speak. I didn't even know where Peeta was, though I assumed he was still in District Twelve, that was where I had last seen him, during my year of district arrest, though I had ignored him the whole time, avoiding him as if he were a next of Tracker Jackers.

I missed them all so much, I couldn't take it. I wasn't as strong as I had once been. So I became what the Capitol had always wanted me to become. Its puppet. I went to all the horrible loud parties. I accepted guest spots of TV shows. It wasn't the life that I wanted in any way, but it was almost bearable.

xxx

I flopped down on the bed in my hotel room after showering. It was late, even though I had left the party early. I did that often, only stayed at the parties long enough to pretend to be cheerful and happy and have conversations with people that I forgot about the minute they walked away.

I had to attend a brunch at some woman named Sparkle Quinton's house. Apparently she was some author or something. I had never heard of her, but my appearance was necessary at her party, just like it was at all the others.

Nothing had changed really, District Twelve was still a poor district, people just didn't starve and the mines were safer. The people of the Capitol still died their skin and wore ugly wigs. The only dramatic difference was that there was no Hunger Games.

xxx

I stared at myself in the mirror. The short frilly lavender dress with a low neckline was uncomfortable and my elaborate braided updo was too tight, but my new stylist Aira tried, but she could never be Cinna.

I slipped on a pair of worn black flats, ignoring the stilettos that were set out before heading out the door of my small apartment.

My car waited outside, the driver waited patiently for me to get in, ignoring my curses when my dress got caught on the door.

We didn't speak as he drove me down the busy streets and into a rich neighborhood filled with candy colored houses before pulling up in front of a bright orange one. I sat in the car for a few moments, trying to compose myself so that I didn't look like the beat up broken person that I was.

After a few minutes though, I knew that I couldn't stall any longer, so after mumbling my thanks to the driver I climbed out and headed up the long driveway, paved bright orange.

A man dressed in a bright green suit opened the door for me as I walked into the house. I almost sighed in relief when I found that it looked a little more normal on the inside. Music was playing and I followed the signs that had been posted on the walls to the ball room that had been turned into a huge dining area with many small tables. There was a longer table lining the wall, food covering it so thoroughly that I could hardly see the pristine white table cloth.

I began to make my way through the thongs of people towards my best friend, food, when a woman with bright yellow hair and overly tanned skin jumped in front of me.

"Katniss! I'm so glad that you could make it! I'm Sparkle, of course you know that though,"

"I'm glad to be here," I lied unconvincingly, but like most people she didn't even noticed as she followed me to the buffet and chatting eagerly, talking so quickly that even if I was listening I wouldn't know what the hell she was talking about.

I was making myself a up a bowl of fruit when she squealed excitedly,"Oh there he is! I have to go, we'll talk more later!" before dashing away.

"Good riddance," I muttered to myself before making my way to an empty table way in the back of the room and sitting down.

xxx

I had been at this stupid brunch for an hour now, and to my great pleasure Sparkle still hadn't found the need to talk to me yet. I had only left my table twice, to get pancakes and then to get more pancakes.

I hadn't gotten up to dance like many others did when a good song came on. Hardly anyone noticed me sitting in the corner like this so I was lucky enough to be able to be alone.

I swallowed my last bite of pancakes and began the trek around the edge of the room to the garbage can, keeping my head down in hopes that no one would recognize me.

"Oof!" I walked straight into someone's chest.

"I'm so sorr-" I stopped short as I looked up and saw just who I had walked into. I hadn't expected to see him at a Capitol party of all places. I thought that I was safe here from anyone that would cause that horrible surge of guilt to overcome me.

I struggled to compose myself, resisting the urge to bolt.

"Katniss!" he exclaimed, shocked.

"Peeta. It's nice to see you again," I said stiffly, tugging at my dress.

"H-how have things been?" he asked, blinking a few times as if trying to hold back tears. My own tears prickled behind my eyes, just waiting for a moment to escape.

"Fine," I answered shortly as I examined him. He didn't look like he was unhappy, yet I didn't either so that didn't do much to quell my guilt. If anything my guilt only got worse, not because he didn't look unhappy though, but because he had apparently regained that look of pure love and just a tinge of lust that he had when he looked at me.

"It's been. . . .difficult for me without you Katniss," Peeta said honestly.

I've always hated that, how utterly honest he could be.

"It's been difficult for everyone, Peeta," I said, cursing myself for how careless I sounded. It was thoughtless, he was probably having a harder time then me.

"I know. You're probably going through a lot more than me-"

"No don't Peeta. Don't do that. I know that you are having a hard time, we all are, but what I said was thoughtless,"

Peeta offered me a small smile, in it I almost saw the old Peeta, the one before we had both been in the Hunger Games twice, the boy with the bread.

A/N: I hoped that you all liked the first chapter, I was going to make it longer, but I have to get to sleep early because I have to go on some errands before school tomorrow. I promise that I'll have the next chapter posted soon though, hopefully tomorrow or Tuesday night.

~~KHC