Stan Smith vs. Rusev (U.S. title)

Stan and his family were at Payback. Stan was able to…convince the guards at the entrance of the coliseum to give him and his family free tickets (including Roger, who was disguised as a hippie). They got pretty good seats in the 5th row, and were currently watching Zack Ryder vs Rusev for the United States title. Stan, being the over patriotic man he was, was the loudest person in the crowd, cheering for Zack Ryder, and booing (and occasionally saying some racist things) at Rusev. Despite this, Rusev was able to put Ryder in the Accolade.

"Come on Ryder! Fight out! Do it for America!" Stan shouted, trying in vain to help Zack escape. "Dad, I don't think that the outcome of this match will affect America in any way," Hailey said as she was not showing interest in this match, as she was waiting for Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens. "It will, Hailey! The president will lose faith in his American wrestlers and next thing you know, we'll lose America to North Korea!" Stan babbled as Hailey rolled her eyes.

During the little conversation, Zack tried and failed to escape from the Accolade. Zack eventually tapped out, and Rusev's music played. Stan then got angry and started screaming in sorrow. "Bulgaria just beat America! How could this get any worse?!" Stan asked while bashing his head against the fan barricade. Just then, Rusev started attacking Zack Ryder after the bell rings. Stan snapped, and despite his family's protests, Stan jumped over the barricade before Mojo Rawley could even make it to the side of the ring.

"Who the hell are you?" Mojo asked. "Hey, I remember you! Dean, right?" Stan asked. "Oh yeah, you're the guy who thought I was a terrorist because of my name!" Dean yelled at him. Stan the turned around awkwardly, and grabbed a microphone from ringside. "You! You don't deserve to represent these United States. Zack isn't that cool, but you don't deserve it with the way you insult this great country!" Stan yelled at Rusev. Rusev then got a microphone, and got in Stan's face. "You stupid American! You dare talk to me this way? I will keep this US title as long as I want. What are you going to do about it?" Rusev yelled at Stan.

Stan then took his shirt off, and told Rusev to bring it on. "I bet I can beat you for that US title, and make sure you see what a Real American can do!" Stan yelled at him. Rusev looked at him surprised, and just nodded his head and handed the title to the referee.

*Bell rings*

Stan wrestles Rusev to the ground and punches her in the face repeatedly. When Rusev gets up, Rusev kicks Stan in the leg, and knees Stan in the face. Rusev then attempts a flip senton, but Stan put his knees up and rolled Rusev up.

Ref: 1…

Rusev kicked out and threw Stan into the corner. Rusev then hit Stan with a corner hip attack. Rusev then hit a fallaway slam on Stan and kicked Stan in the stomach. Rusev then threw Stan out of the ring, and gloated with his Bulgarian flag. Stan then got back into the ring, and dropkicked Rusev to the ground. Stan then hit three german suplexes before pinning him.

Ref: 1…2

Stan tried to lock in the Ankle Lock, but Lana went up to the apron, and distracted Stan. Rusev used this distraction to blast Stan with a Superkick to the back of the head. Rusev the hit his flip senton on Stan's back. Lana then went to where Francine and the Smiths were sitting, and started making fun of them. Francine then got angry and slapped her in the face. This led to a catfight that distracted the referee. Rusev was about to stomp on Stan's back, but Stan rolled over and countered it with a low blow.

Stan then hit an Olympic Slam on Rusev and went to the top rope. Stan posed for the crowd a little bit before hitting a moonsault. Stan then put Rusev in the Ankle Lock. After a while, Rusev tapped out.

*Bell rings*

Announcer: Here…is your…winner…and the new…US champion, Stan Smith?

The announcer was just as surprised as the crowd/ The crowd was in a stunned silence, not knowing how some random guy was able to defeat Rusev for his title no less. People then cheered due to the Un-American jerk losing the US title. Stan and his family then celebrated in the ring while Lana was screaming at the referee. Then, the American flag dropped down behind Stan while he was holding the US title up.

Epilogue:

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN I CAN'T KEEP THE TITLE?" Stan shouted at Vince and Triple H, who met him in the back. "Well, you're not a contracted wrestler, and you work for the CIA. We don't need that kind of exposure. I beat the Federal Government once, and I don't need to do it again," Vince replied." "Right, so hand over the title," Triple H said holding his hand out.

Stan looked at the title, and took a deep breath. "I understand. You can have the belt back…if you catch me!" Stan said before he bolted out of Vince's office. Vince was about to chase after him, but Triple H stopped him. "Don't worry about it, I got someone on it," Triple H said with a sinister smile on his face. "Speaking of which, WHY THE HELL DID YOU MAKE ROMAN LOOK BAD AT WRESTLEMANIA?!" Vince yelled at him. "Oh boy," Triple H sighed.

Just as Stan was about to leave the arena, Rusev tackled him and threw him into the wall. Rusev then took his title back, gave it to Lana, and grabbed Stan by the throat. "If I ever see you or your family again, I will personally disembowel you and eat your heart in front of your children," Rusev said darkly before letting Stan go. Stan then left running to his SUV, and vowed to never come back to another arena for WWE, opting to use the WWE Network. After all, its only $9.99 a month.