"Sirius!"
Remus sighed and closed his book wearily, setting it down on the coffee table they so rarely used. He had better go and see what they were up to. Again.
He was halfway towards the kitchen when Sirius skittered past him, pausing only to smirk knowingly at his friend. Remus could hear her grumbling as she bashed around the small basement-turned-wash room and paused at the doorway to listen.
"come live with us Hermione, won't be any bother Hermione, oh no of course Sirius won't be like that with you Hermione." She broke her ranting to snort and then she called out "Sirius if that's you hoping to see my underwear again you should know I was quite serious about that body binding charm."
Remus stepped into the room with his hands held up in defence "it's just me. Sirius has already fled the scene of the crime." They smiled at each other and then Remus frowned as Hermione's words sunk in, "did Sirius see your underwear?" He asked, finally taking in the large pile of washing Hermione had clearly been sorting through before being disturbed.
Hermione flushed as red as the top she was holding and shook her head "yes he did," she informed him "the deviant has been keeping note of when I do my washing and then appearing just as I'm sorting it out so he can comment on various items. I tried changing my routine but he either really does have the hearing of a dog or he's monitoring the room in some way as he always appears at the same point, regardless of any changes I make. At this point I'm going to have to start doing my washing somewhere else."
"So strangers can see your underwear instead of Sirius?"
She shrugged "I'd prefer it that way. People don't talk to strangers simply to comment on their clothing; Sirius is a different matter entirely."
As she spoke something was fighting free from Hermione's pile of sorted washing. As it unfolded itself Remus realised it must have been the underwear Sirius was so intent on seeing. Hermione noticed his expression change and glanced over her shoulder. She screamed in embarrassment and grabbed the bra as it made its way towards the doorway. "Sirius Black I swear I will send you back to the veil myself if I find out you've been stealing my underwear!" She shot a warning look at Remus before stomping off. Moments later he heard the library door slam and knew he would not be wise to return there until she had calmed down.
"So why exactly are you so keen on Hermione's underwear all of a sudden Padfoot?" Remus asked, walking into Sirius' room without knocking and settling himself on the armchair Sirius insisted on keeping in his bedroom.
Sirius smirked at his friend and shook his head, his slightly unkempt hair falling into his face as he did so. Remus growled warningly and Sirius raised his hands pleadingly "look, I didn't set out to do it, alright? I walked in by accident once and my intrigue was aroused."
Remus snorted "oh really, just your intrigue was aroused was it?"
The animagus beamed at him "seriously Remus, our conservative little bookworm has some pretty adventurous underwear if you catch my drift."
"Yes, thanks to you attempting to retrieve said underwear I had an introductory course to it."
Sirius raised a knowing eyebrow "and you're telling me your 'intrigue' wasn't aroused?" He ducked as a flame was aimed his way and batted it out when it landed on a pillow "hey, no need to get so defensive Moony old friend. Anyway," he went on, "I wasn't trying to retrieve it for myself, merely trying to provoke a reaction from you because, frankly, I'm tired of you mooning over her and doing nothing about it." He paused, waiting for Remus to make the connection "get it? Mooning?" Sirius snorted like a gleeful schoolboy while Remus rolled his eyes at him.
"Delightful" he drawled "and what I do, or don't do, with regards to my feelings is none of your business so I'd appreciate it if you kept out of both my business and Hermione's washing."
Sirius watched as Remus left the room and shook his head. Honestly, for all his brains sometimes Remus could be so dense.
"Oh Ginny it was so embarrassing! I don't care about Sirius doing it because I know he's just winding me up but this is Remus we're talking about!"
There was a pause in conversation as Ginny obviously replied and Remus realised that Hermione must be calling Ginny on the phone, given that Ginny was supposed to be visiting Charlie in Romania with Harry.
"You know why Ginny and no I don't want to discuss that now. For all I know Sirius is standing outside listening to every word and recording it ready to humiliate me. I swear he's trying to torment me."
Another pause and Remus squirmed uncomfortably as he attempted to back away from the library door and into the kitchen.
"It was the green set; remember that one you made me buy last time we went shopping? Yes the green and silver one, how many different sets do you think I have? Well those are the only two I own and they were only bought under duress."
Remus made it into the kitchen and reached into the drinks cupboard to make himself a hot chocolate. He was just searching the fridge for some whipped cream when the door opened behind him and he heard a nervous cough. Hermione was standing in the doorway, mug in one hand and whipped cream proffered in the other outstretched one.
"Clearly we both have the same idea when it comes to hot chocolate" she said shyly when he still didn't say anything.
"You've been crying" he said hoarsely, taking in the state of her slightly puffed up eyes, hastily applied eye make up and pale face. She shrugged and turned her gaze to the floor, clearly upset that he'd noticed. "Does he bother you that much?" He asked, freeing her hands of the mug and cream and gently leading her to one of the many dining room chairs.
She sat down and pulled her knees up against her chest. "Not really" she said quietly, shaking her head and tugging at the end of her ponytail.
"Then why?" He asked, already guessing the answer but not wanting to upset her more by admitting he'd overheard her phone conversation with Ginny.
"You" she said "you seeing my…my stuff bothers me because I respect you and it's just really embarrassing. Ginny said I shouldn't be embarrassed, but I am anyway."
He placed a hand on her arm and waited until she was looking at him before speaking "you have nothing to be embarrassed about" he assured her, "many men would be thrilled."
She snorted "yes I'm sure many would. But you're not one of them."
Remus recalled Sirius' words earlier and the knowing looks he'd flash Remus' way whenever Remus and Hermione were together. He decided to take his own advice for once and actually do something. "Who says I'm not?" He challenged.
She blinked owlishly at him. "Pardon?" She asked, "did you just say…" She trailed off blushingly.
"Yes, I did." He confirmed, suddenly noticing that his hand had been rubbing up and down Hermione's arm.
"Oh" She managed to get out, still blinking up at him bewilderedly.
He managed a small smile at her "Oh?" He said "is that all you can think of in response?" Her eyes widened in horror, thinking she'd upset him, and he chuckled "here I am telling you I have feelings for you and all you can say is 'oh'. Charming."
She smiled back, relieved to realise that he was merely teasing her about her reaction, "if I recall correctly, your feelings were merely ones that included me and my underwear." She retorted, drawing herself up haughtily but allowing him to see her smile slightly.
Instead he noticed the keen spark in her eye that was always present whenever she was teasing somebody back. He shook his head "not just you and your underwear." He replied, his tone becoming more serious "but you. Most definitely you: you and your schedule for everything from the most important task at the ministry to the most mundane of washing your clothes; you and your teasing twinkle which you think is still a secret but I figured it out months ago; you and your fierce anger at Sirius for winding you up but sheer embarrassment at me witnessing what he did. You, Hermione Granger. Most definitely you."
Hermione watched him, as if waiting for the punch line. When he merely sat there, watching her as she watched him suspiciously, she took a deep breath and forced herself to ask "did you really mean that Remus?"
He nodded "all of it. Although I wouldn't object to the underwear option either" he said, lightening the atmosphere and giving her a way out if she wanted one.
Instead she unfolded herself and pushed up from her seat, pressing herself up against Remus. "How about all of the above?" She whispered, kissing him so softly that their lips barely met.
Remus grinned delightedly at her "with pleasure" he said, his deep voice stirring up Hermione's belly with lust. She grabbed his hand and began pulling him out of the kitchen.
As the pair ran giggling past Sirius' bedroom he stuck his head out of the door "can I watch?" He yelled after them.
"No!" They both shouted back over their shoulders.
Sirius shook his head as Hermione's bedroom door slammed shut and excited shrieks could be faintly heard along the hallway. "Some people are no fun."