The Poem of Dib-by Doom And Stuff And Zim Too



Dedicated to Manda



This loser named Dib
Whose corn-filled mouth told lies,
Knew of the Irken Zim,
Who lived on Earth in disguise.

Dib: Hey, I'm not a loser! And what's with this talk about me and corn?

Narrator: Yes, you are. Now shut up.

Dib: No! Why should I?

*Armed thugs appear, growling menancingly at Dib. He gulps and shuts up.*

Narrator: Now, where was I? Ahh, yes.

Zim knew of this "threat."
But he didn't sweat.
Dib never did anything right,
...Or not yet...

Zim: Ha ha ha! See me not sweating? You suck!

Dib: Hey, well...shush! Just continue!

Narrator: Sheesh, give me a break.

So one day these two had a bit of a spat
In the middle-

GIR: CUPCAKE!!!

Narrator: Aww, he's so cute! Now, anyway.

So one day these two had a bit of a spat.
In the middle of their classroom at Skool, and at that
Miss Bitters, their teacher, was watching a rat
(Well she looks like a snake doesn't she?)
And all of a sudden GIR cried, "Not nonfat?!?!"

Dib: Hey! Since when does that robot thing go to Skool?

Narrator: Who's telling this story, me or you? Shut up!

*Sharp, pointy spikes suddenly thrust out from the walls, pointing at Dib*

Dib: Gulp.

Narrator: That's what I thought. Much better.

*Zim snickers and does the Loser sign to Dib*

Narrator: Ahem.

The next day, a-following,
While Miss Bitters was swallowing
(The rat-what else? Or maybe a mouse)
Dib was in the shower (major nasty yuck and yeah)
And at that VERY hour...

Zim was hugging his sandwichy friend.
GIR was watching the show that would never end;
Suddenly, the phone rang-a message did send!
"The phone!" a-cried Zim, "my sandwich-er house, I will defend!"

Dib: Looks like Zim's got a soft spot for lunch meat and bread!

Zim: NO! NOT THE MEAT!!

Narrator: Chill, Zim, there's no meat in the sandwich.

Zim: Whew.

Dib: What a loser.

*Anvil falls out of the sky and narrowly misses Dib*

Dib: I get the point!

Narrator: Well, obviously you DON'T. Or by now, you would realize that I like Zim a lot more than you.

*Dib grumbles*

Narrator: Now STOP INTERRUPTING ME!!!! So-

GIR: The pancakes are coming! The pancakes are coming!

*GIR runs around and around until he falls down and laughs hysterically*

Narrator: AWWW!!! He's precious!

Zim squeaked out, "Hel-lo?"

It was Dib!
And he was singing, "My, my, this here In-va-der guy, maybe tallest someday later, now he's just a small guy. He left his home to take over our planet on high, singing, "Doom de doom doom doom de doom doom."

GIR: No! No! I was singing that! Meeeeee!

Narrator: Look, it had to rhyme, okay? Or fit, actually.

Zim: Can we PLEASE skip on? I must check on the giant radioactive rubber pants experiment. The pants command me!

Narrator: Fine.

The next day there was a test
At the Skool, and when the rest
Of the class did their best
Dib suddenly appeared with a big shiny bottle of Crest.

Dib cried, "What'd you do, Zim?
Why this toothpaste-y curse?"
Zim grinned and replied, "Ask the mongoose."

THE END.

Dib: WHAT KIND OF FREAKIN STUPID POEM IS THAT? THERE'S NO PLOT AND IT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE!!!

Narrator: Okay, now I REALLY don't like you. What's your deal?

Dib: Well, you keep dissing me and calling me a loser and making me die! And what the heck does the mongoose have anything to do with this?

Zim: Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GIR: That was mighty disturbing, my good lads.

Narrator: Okay, new plan. We team up and attack the Butt Ugly Martians. Man, I HATE, LOATHE, ABHOR, DETEST, AND DESPISE THEM!!

Dib: Okay, sure!

Zim: I'm in!

GIR: MEEEEEEEETTTTOOOOOOOO!!!!

*Narrator, Zim, Dib, GIR, and most of the IZ characters are seen marching down a road carrying protest signs, torches, and pitchforks*

~~~TO BE FINISHED....LATER~~~



Author's Note: Um....this started out as a Zim poem I wrote on the bus, then my friend Manda made it into a cool comic. Check it out on
www.zim-is-cool.cityslide.com Actually, we did the whole "The Saga Begins" song, aka American Pie song.

Please review! Oh, and by the way, does anyone else here hate the BUMs? I can't stand them!!!

~LOTW