And as promised, the first chapter of the sequel to the infamous Axis. A few notes before we begin:

-If you haven't read Axis, go and do that IMMEDIATELY. Nothing in this will make sense if you don't read it. I am not exaggerating.

-If you don't like the way I write/the stories I choose to tell, don't read. It's as simple as that.

-I absolutely love and adore every single review I get, even if I don't respond. If you don't want to review here, drop me a message at my tumblr. (The url is spencerpls.)

And without further ado:

Jumping to conclusions had gotten Spencer Hastings in a lot of trouble in her life. A lot of the entire A fiasco in her childhood could have been avoided if she'd just taken a minute to stop and breathe and really consider what she was thinking about doing. After the tumultuous atmosphere of her youth had passed, she never desired to repeat any of the aspects of that period ever again. First step was to change herself and her tendencies, and pray that the rest of the world would follow suit, and that the universe would stop making her its bitch. Jumping to conclusions had to be the first thing to go.

But standing there, watching Hanna chastise her apparent son when Spencer had last known her to be alone and childless five years ago, she couldn't help but let the preemptive conclusions rush in. Ideas of lies and protective conspiracies flooded in, making her so dizzy that she had to lean against the marble wall of the hotel for support. It didn't help, of course, to have the sudden shock of seeing her again, with no warning, no time to prepare, nothing. Never before in her life had Spencer felt so unhinged in one single moment, not even after they'd broken up the first time, although that came close. That time, and this time, she had felt so violated, having everything cast onto her without any warning and certainly without her consent.

"God, this is…so messed up." Spencer finally looked up to accidentally lock eyes with Hanna as she spoke. God, she looked good, as strange as she felt thinking that. Her hair fell in soft, straight layers to her shoulders, but not past them. She was wearing glass with dark, thick frames, the square angles of the lenses neatly framing her still bright eyes and her impossibly long lashes. She was dressed smartly, in blazer and blouse over jeans and sensible heels, leaving Spencer feeling woefully inadequate in her coffee stained shirt and sneakers. "Liam, here." Hanna shoved what looked like twenty dollars' worth of quarters into the boy's hands, his hazel eyes getting wide as he gazed down at them. "Go play in the arcade down the hall, I need to...do something, just go." She shooed him away before looking back at Spencer.

Spencer found herself backing down the hallway away from Hanna as though she was a predator ready to strike. She did feel rather prey-like in this situation, all vulnerable and unsuspecting as a huge bombshell crept up behind her, taking the form of a lost little boy's harried mother, and also her ex. "Is that how you lost him in the first place?"

Hanna's eyes narrowed slightly, and she took her glasses off, unable to conceal the brief expression of hurt that flashed across her features. "He's adventurous, he wanders off. I figured a leash would be just a little bit inhumane."

"Right, well…" Spencer trailed off, taking stock of herself. God, she was toxic. Just being around her made her feel feverish, in both good and bad ways, which made her hate herself. Even with everything that had happened between them, all of the wrongs they had both committed, the attraction hadn't died. That terrified her. There was no telling what mistakes she was liable to make, especially in such a fragile emotional state. What was wrong with her? "I should be going." She began to back away.

"No, wait." Before Spencer could dodge her, Hanna reached forward, grabbing her wrist, stopping her. "Please, it's…Liam…it isn't what you think."

"I don't think anything, Hanna." Spencer lied. She thought so many things, she didn't know what one she actually believed. "And it really isn't any of my business, so…" She tugged her wrist out of Hanna's grip. "If you'll excuse me, I have somewhere to be."

Get away from her. That was the mantra that screamed in her head over and over again. The true extent of Hanna's toxicity and her reaction to it was really starting to hit her full force, with every conflicting feeling she could ever possibly have about the woman gathering in her chest. The polarizing storm of emotions felt like it was literally about to tear her apart. It was all she could do to keep her expression flat and walk away with her dignity before she broke down quietly in her room. (Or not quietly at all, as it would probably end up.)

"Spencer…Spencer!" Spencer kept walking, even while hearing Hanna's heels clicking down the hallway after her. She was strong, she could fight this, she wasn't going to spend any more time around her than –

"Wren's dead."

- necessary.

Spencer turned on her back heel, the split emotions at bay for the moment, instead feeling herself fill with a more indeterminate mixture of emotions. "I didn't…what does that have to do with anything?" She asked finally, the wind taken out of her defiance.

"Because…" Hanna sighed as she caught up to her. "Can we sit down or something? It's a really long story, and if I try to tell you now, you're just going to start jumping off to conclusions and storming off, and despite what you might think, I don't want you to hate me."

Spencer was hurt for a moment until she remembered she'd just spent the past five minutes jumping to conclusions. She wrapped her arms around her chest, considering this for a moment. She was being asked to break every single rule she had set for herself before she'd left New York. But this was Wren, and as much as she regretted what had happened, as badly as it had ended, she had still cared about him, fallen for him, at one point. "…there's a park across the street from the coffee shop a block away. We can go there, because if I'm going to do this, I need coffee."

"Alright." Hanna said, nodding her head rapidly, making her look almost puppy-like, especially when she put her glasses back on. "Liam, come on!" She called, and sure enough, the boy came trotting over after a moment, arms wrapped around a large and cheaply made stuffed animal, something that resembled a lion, but in fluorescent colors.

"I beat the claw machine, mom!" He said excitedly, too wrapped up in his victory to notice that the two women were leaving the hotel, following after them obediently. "And it only took six quarters."

"That's better than last time!" Hanna laughed, resting her hand on Liam's head. Spencer had to admit, Hanna seemed like a good mother – she'd always thought that she'd be, even back then, when she thought kids were a long way off, and that things were going to work out. "What are you going to name him?"

"She's a girl lion, and I don't know yet!" Liam said, shrugging. "Can you hold her while I go play?" He shoved the stuffed animal at Spencer, to her surprise.

"I…of course." Spencer said, after a long moment, taking the stuffed animal from him. "I'll take very good care of her, promise."

"Okay!" Liam beamed, scampering off into the park as Hanna led Spencer across the street. Even for being in the middle of town on a Saturday afternoon, it was relatively silent – or perhaps it was just due to the tension in the air between them, making it so thick that nothing could reach through. She wouldn't have been surprised. Each moment they were in close proximity added something else to it, an old memory, a new feeling, or old feelings tied up with the memories, until Spencer was sure she'd lived the past eleven years in the preceding two minutes.

"I'll watch him from here." Spencer said, sinking down into an ornate metal chair on the patio of the coffee shop, needing respite, just for a moment. "You know what I like…it hasn't changed."

"Of course it hasn't." Hanna said, with a soft sort of smile that caused an ache of nostalgia to bounce around her chest like the sound of church bells, carrying for miles on a clear summer day. She brushed the feathery edged waves of her hair out of her face, letting the smile linger before it faded into measured indifference. "I'll be right back." She said. Spencer looked away until the bell on the door rang twice to signify she was gone.

God, where did she even start? First of all, she had done the one thing she had promised herself she wouldn't do, knew that she couldn't do without any serious emotional ramifications. Second of all, the amount of questions it caused to crash down on her was positively dizzying. She closed her eyes, resting her head in her hands. What did Hanna have to tell her? What did Wren have to do with any of it? How had Wren died in the first place?

But the question she found that was grating at her most was how was Hanna so calm? Or rather, how could she keep such a flat façade? Spencer knew her own was cracking and dissolving more and more by the second, but Hanna looked as perfectly placated as ever, and that worried her more than she ever cared to admit. Hanna had always been ruled by her emotions, and that wasn't something that changed overnight, or even in five years or ten years. But there was no sign of anything left over, and Spencer had to wonder…did Hanna care as much as she did? Did she even care at all?

And this was exactly why she promised herself she wouldn't do this.

Spencer glanced up to make sure Liam was still at the park, waving slightly when he looked up from his action figures, playing in the dust, away from the other children. She wondered, briefly, what kept him separate from the other children, what it was about him that they didn't like. He was smart, outgoing, precocious…of course she had only known him for about fifteen minutes at most, so she couldn't be an accurate judge. Not that she should be so invested in the child of her ex-girlfriend already, or ever.

"Here." Spencer glanced over as a large cardboard cup was set on the glass table in front of her. "I hope I got it right, it's been awhile." Hanna said, sitting down across the table from her, perfectly manicured fingers wrapped around, of all things, an iced green tea.

Spencer took a sip from her cup after contemplating this curiosity. "Large brewed coffee with four shots of espresso, sugar, no cream." She glanced up at Hanna. "It's perfect, thank you." She drank some more, instantly feeling a little more bolstered against her own emotions. "So what do you have to tell me? And why does Wren have anything to do with it?"

Hanna took a deep breath, averting her eyes, leaning down and sipping from her green tea for a moment. "Wren is Liam's father." The outpouring of outraged, negative emotions began almost instantly, but was cut short as Hanna finished the sentence. "…but I am not his biological mother."

"What?" Spencer said, physically jarred from how suddenly her reaction was cut off. "I don't understand…"

"It was five years ago, just after I left…well, you know." She muttered quickly, sucking down more green tea, letting the awkward air settle before continuing. "And I went home, I was…well, at any rate, I came here. And Wren was back, working at the hospital, and I ran into him, and he took me out for a drink. Turns out, he had been sleeping with this woman, and she'd gotten pregnant and had split after Liam was born. He was running ragged trying to keep up with his work and take care of him, and he had enlisted in the Army as a medic just after we graduated, so he had that to deal with too…I felt so bad for him." Hanna sighed heavily. Spencer tried to reserve judgment. "I was lonely too. I had nowhere to go. We never really…dealt with what had happened between us, or rather what didn't. I didn't really know what was happening, but…it happened. Like a whirlwind" She glanced down.

"So how did he die?" Spencer asked, taking all of this in, trying desperately not to react until she knew the whole story. "And how did you end up with Liam?"

"He was sent overseas. Two years ago." Hanna said, eyes getting misty for a moment. This time, it was Spencer's turn to look away, she couldn't stand it. "I opened the door three months later and two officers handed me a folded flag, and…the entire whirlwind just stopped short, and I didn't know what to do with myself."

"I'm sorry." Spencer said honestly, nursing her coffee, feeling her own, deep down pang of sadness. "He didn't deserve that. And Liam didn't deserve to lose his father." Suddenly, much more about Liam made sense to her, and even more than before, her heart went out to him, making her momentarily forget herself – there were bigger things, after all.

"Yeah, I worry about him." Hanna's gaze drifted to the park, and Spencer saw what she had known all along – Hanna absolutely loved that boy, even if he wasn't technically her own son. That was just who she was, who she had always been, and it was slightly comforting to Spencer, to know that there was something about her that hadn't changed.

She mentally slapped herself before her brain went down that road again. "So, if you're not his real mother, how did you end up with him?"

"Well…" Hanna said, suddenly taking on a nervous air, clasping her necklace in her hand. "His mother gave up her parental rights, and I adopted him…just after Wren and I got married." She added, after a long pause.

Spencer's coffee cup almost exploded in her hand as her grip tightened. Just when she'd though she'd gotten over the shock of seeing her and everything that followed, she dropped that bomb on her, led her to step on that emotional land mine. She wanted to not care, that was what she wanted most in the world, but she couldn't not care about Hanna and what she did…that was an impossibility. "I…oh." She said softly, nodding as Hanna showed her the necklace, on which a wedding ring and a large engagement ring dangled. "I see." She swallowed hard, her stomach in knots as she thought about them together, feeling physically sick. This was Hanna's life, and after what had occurred, she had no right to be upset, but that could never stop her. She had convinced herself for years that things were different now, that she'd moved on, that she would never let Hanna and her life get to her, but she was suddenly forced to realize that she hadn't moved on at all, and she was still the same seventeen year old girl, watching from afar, left out in the cold.

"Spencer, I – "

"Did you love him?" Spencer found herself asking, before she could stop the question. She didn't even feel bad for it. She needed to know.

Hanna looked at her for a long moment, and Spencer searched her expression, but found nothing, infuriatingly. "Now that...that's none of your business." She said quietly.

And just like that, she reached her limit. She couldn't handle any more. She couldn't listen to her voice or look at her face for one more second or she was going to lose it. "I should go." She said, with a sharp nod, standing up. "Thanks for the coffee."

Hanna stood up as well, and Spencer spared one more glance at her. Her expression was slowly filling up with a million words and emotions, her mask of true indifference finally broken. Spencer could only manage a small and sick sense of victory from that. "I…Spencer…"

"No, I…need to get ready." Spencer said, standing up. "And…and everything. I'll see you later." She said, although it was hard to disguise the fact that she was looking forward to it with dread, and not pleasant anticipation. She shattered their eye contact after a long moment, although she knew she'd never forget the look in Hanna's eyes, and she hated herself for it. "…bye." She turned away from her, and began walking down the street, not even realizing that Liam's lion was still clasped loosely in her hand.

The sad thing was that she knew this was a whirlwind, just like Hanna had said. She just didn't know if it had just started, or if it had come to a close.

"Alright, get up!" Spencer shrieked as she was suddenly thrown to the floor, the sheets jerked out from under her – metaphorically speaking, this time. She rubbed her still aching head, pushing herself upright to find Aria staring at her from the other side of the bed. "I got your message. And we have to be there in an hour, and you're not even ready yet." Aria tossed some clothes at her. "Talk and get dressed at the same time, I know you're a good multitasker."

"I'm having an existential crisis right now, Aria…or whatever." Spencer waved her off, hauling herself back onto the bed, lying flat on her back, staring at the ceiling. Her mind had come to a standstill while processing all of this, it was all too much for her to handle, especially when faced with the prospect of seeing her again in only an hour. "Did you know about all of this?"

"Not…all of it." Aria said evasively, before sighing and crawling onto the bed next to her. "You told me that you didn't want to hear another word about Hanna as long as you lived, so I listened to you. You should be thanking me for being such a good friend." She patted her knee.

Spencer shot Aria a look. "You didn't think that it would be a good idea to, I don't know, bring it up over coffee any of the hundreds of times we've gone? Just a simple 'Hey, Spence, how was your day? By the way, Hanna's getting married to Wren.'? That didn't cross your mind at all?"

"No, I didn't think it was a good idea, actually." Aria said. "I didn't want you going all King Kong on me, and doing something drastic."

"…do I really read as that unhinged?" Spencer returned her gaze to the ceiling after a moment. Well, that was something to chew on. She'd always prided herself on her ability to hide her pain, but if that was really the case, she wasn't as good at it as she thought she was. That would almost certainly bring trouble.

"Not exactly." Aria said, once again in the evasive tone that made Spencer worry. "And that's not the point. The point is, you and Hanna have both moved on, at least at face value, and you need to stick to that. I love you, Spencer, but neither of you two needs to go down that road again. You ripped each other apart."

"You say that like I don't know it." Spencer said, closing her eyes. "And who said I was thinking about going down that road again? We have two completely different lives now. It's not going to work. Even more than it never worked before."

"Good. Now just keep telling yourself that." Aria said, sitting up. "And you'll be able to get through tonight unscathed."

"I don't know why I even came to this thing in the first place." Spencer moaned, dragging a pillow over her face. "There's no one I care enough about to face the firing squad in order to see again. I mean, think about it." She peered out from under the pillow at Aria. "My family and I are at odds, I see you in New York all the time, Emily doesn't talk to me anymore, Hanna is…well, we already covered that topic…there's no one else. All everyone ever knew about us was the whole A thing. By the end of it all, they looked at us like we were in a fishbowl. Why would I want to catch up with those people?"

"So you're saying that there's no one." Aria confirmed, raising an eyebrow. "No one you want to see again after all this time?"

Spencer was suddenly assaulted by a strong memory of Kyle, the desire to talk to her again flickering through her unexpectedly. "I…no." She said, swallowing it down. She didn't want to think about what it meant, and that alone meant that it meant something. Of course she would want to see her again, the woman that had helped her so much, but demanded so little in return. So why did she feel the need to conceal it?

"Liar." Aria pushed her shoulder gently.

"Maybe if we'd stuck to that promise we made to never lie again, things would be different." Spencer sighed, ignoring her accusation. "…yeah, that's it, I'm not going, I'm just going to lie here all night and get drunk off the mini bar."

"Nuh uh." Aria said, getting up and going over to Spencer's suitcases, pulling stuff out. "You're going. You didn't come all this way and brave all of these emotional landmines to not go." She tossed a sleek looking, wine-red dress at her, followed by a black shrug, which landed on her face. "Come on, get dressed, I'll try to do something with your hair."

"You're not making the mini bar any less appealing!" Spencer said, not moving other than to tug the black fabric off her face.

"Why rack up a not-so-mini bill here, when you can go drink for free and laugh at how much of a failure everyone from high school is?" Aria asked, unzipping her make-up bag. "Come on. Relationship status aside, you're a successful assistant campaign manager with a one way ticket to a job at the office of the mayor of New York City." Aria said. "Have some pride. You're way better off than some of these people, trust me. I've been home more recently than you. It's going to be a shit show of the 'mom jean' variety. No one will remember or care about A or Hanna or anything when they take one look at you and how successful you've been. Plus, you were Valedictorian. I'm sure you like…have to give a speech or something."

"Speaking of mom jeans." Spencer finally sat up, neglecting to mention that her speech was shoved in the bottom of her second suitcase. "How's Malcolm?"

"He's a sixteen year old boy." Aria shrugged, walking over, placing make-up in her hands. "Put that on. But yeah, he's…well, he's spectacularly well behaved about ninety percent of the time, which I credit Ezra for, but the other ten percent, he's not too keen about the whole 'step mom' thing. It's just because he's a teenager, I mean, I went through that too."

"He'll come around." Spencer assured her, finally standing up, stripping off her still coffee stained top, thankful the focus was off of her for a second. "He's Ezra's kid, I mean, he can't exactly have too many rebellious bones in his body."

Aria nodded her agreement. "He's a good kid at heart." She sat down behind her, pulling her hands through Spencer's shortened hair. "Did you cut this recently, or has it really been that long since I've seen you?"

"…recently." Spencer answered, reluctant to talk about her emotional attack the night before she left , where, in a moment of crisis, she'd chopped a good chunk of her long hair off. "Looks more professional anyway. So, kids…" She glanced back at her, changing the subject. "Are you and Ezra…?"

"Nothing yet." Aria sighed, tweaking the ends of her hair. "Two years of nothing. We're going to a fertility doctor next week to see what's wrong. I mean…clearly Ezra has no trouble getting anyone pregnant, so more than likely, there's something wrong with my pipes."

Spencer turned to look at her friend, the one person who had been at her side no matter what had happened to her. "It will happen." She assured her gently. It was the least she could do. "One way or another. The Aria Montgomery-Fitz I know never gives up."

Aria laughed a little, leaning in and kissing her cheek. "The Spencer Hastings that I know needs to shut up and get ready." She plucked the hem of the tank top she'd been wearing underneath the coffee stained shirt. "Come on. Get dressed while I look at the mini bar." Aria slid off the bed with a smile.

"If this goes wrong, it's all your fault for making me go!" Spencer said, shifting off her lounge pants as Aria turned away from her.

"It's not going to go wrong, but I will gladly accept that challenge." She said. "Remind me to stay here next time, there are many more choices than at Mom's Bed and Breakfast."

Once she'd shimmied into different undergarments and the dress, Spencer moved over to Aria, hugging her from behind. "Thanks." She sighed heavily. "For everything."

"No problem, Spence." Aria turned in her arms, hugging her back tightly. "Anything for you."

Spencer stared at the long table that was sporadically dotted with name tags. It was draped with a sky blue tablecloth, as per the school's colors, and each white name tag looked like a separate little cloud against it. Gathering storm clouds, she thought to herself, before she swallowed hard, approaching the next available registrar. "Hi, I'm – "

"Spencer Hastings, as I live and breathe." Spencer was stuck, like a slap in the face, by the heavy southern accent in the woman's voice. She looked closer at her, and realized she had been on the field hockey team with her, a girl named Tegan, who had apparently left Rosewood just as quickly as she had. She had just flown south. "You haven't changed a bit."

"Oh, you'd be surprised…" Spencer said, letting out an awkward half chuckle that Tegan didn't seem to notice.

"Let me just check you off here." The short haired blonde chewed on her lower lip, a habit she remembered from back then, running an index finger down the list strapped to the clipboard. "And there you are." She pointed a little ways down the table towards her nametag. "How have you been, darlin'?"

Maybe Aria had been right. She stifled a laugh, sighing. "You know, college, work, paying rent…the usual." She said, a sudden thought striking her. "Hey, could you tell me if Kyle Laughlin is going to be here? She was that student teacher we had senior year, for all the government classes."

"Right! Let me take a look…" Tegan looked thoughtful as she scanned the list. "No, I'm sorry…I know we invited her, I mean, she's a full time teacher at the school now, but it doesn't look like she even got back to us. There are some other teachers here, though." She said, looking a bit like a puppy who wanted to please her.

"Right." Spencer said, sighing, hiding the frisson of disappointment that ran through her at the thought of not seeing Kyle there. If she still lived in town, though, it probably wouldn't be hard to get in touch with her…maybe she should have done that instead of coming here. "Thank you anyway." She said.

"Mhm, mhm, no problem." Tegan said. "Just grab your name tag, it's happy hour, you can go mingle. I'm sure you have plenty of exciting stories to tell."

"Yeah." Spencer answered shortly, offering her a weak smile as she moved down the table, locating her name tag after a cursory glance over the table. With morbid curiosity, she let her eyes wander. She noted, with an unpleasant taste in her mouth, that one name tag was annoyingly emblazoned with the name 'Caleb Rivers,' meaning he'd more than likely be showing up at some point. "Just something else to look forward to." She muttered under her breath to herself, crossing her arms over her chest. If there was one person she had wanted to see even less than Hanna, it was him.

Aria's name tag was gone, Emily's wasn't, and neither was Hanna's, she realized, with a resigned sigh. Of course, this could be a good thing. Maybe she would chicken out and the event wouldn't turn into a clusterfuck by the end. Slightly bolstered by this, she fastened her own name tag onto her dress, sticking herself with the pin as someone tapped on her shoulder. "Shit!"

"Oh God, I'm sorry!" Spencer turned to lay eyes on none other than Paige McCullers. Like Tegan had so unabashedly exclaimed about Spencer, she hadn't changed a bit. Literally. It was like she had walked out of the yearbook. "Had I known you were handling sharp objects, I wouldn't have been so spontaneous."

Spencer laughed a little – somehow, even though she was talking to Emily's girlfriend, (at least, she thought they were still girlfriends,) it didn't feel even the least bit awkward. "It'll heal." She said, finding herself smiling. "How have you been?"

"Emily and I have been great." Paige replied, which answered Spencer's question. "She's still swimming, down in Boston. She made it all the way to the Olympics. Helped the relay team take silver."

"I know." Spencer said, with a small smile. "I watched the whole thing. Cheered her on."

"I'm sure she'd be happy to hear that." Paige said, and just like that, the conversation went a direction spencer prayed it wouldn't. She was there, yes, but not in the interest of rebuilding bridges that had been burned long ago. She was in survival mode, looking for nothing more than a badge of honor to wear back to New York. She was there to prove that she could do it, and for no other reason.

"I…I should be heading inside." Spencer said, trying to duck away from her. "But tell her I said hi."

"You can tell her yourself, she's right there." Spencer swallowed hard as she turned to see Emily walking down the hallway towards them. Like Paige, and apparently herself, she hadn't changed much. She was perhaps a bit more muscular, wearing her hair slightly shorter, her features more well defined. She was clad in a purple wrap dress, similar to Spencer's own, if anything, just a different color. There was a slight pause in her stride as she noticed Spencer, but she then continued as nothing had happened.
"Spencer, I didn't expect to see you here." She said smoothly as she approached them. "Paige, did you get my nametag?" She suddenly switched subjects, leaving Spencer feeling like she had whiplash.

"I did." She held it out to her, snatching it back at the last second. "But I'm holding it hostage until you two talk." She kissed Emily's cheek before she could get out a word of protest, and left them alone in the hallway.

After a long moment, Spencer raised her gaze to meet Emily's and found hers to be just as apprehensive as she was sure hers was. She cleared her throat, suddenly finding it dry. "Hey…it's been awhile."
"It has." Emily said, nodding, folding her coat over her arm. "How have you been, Spencer?"

Spencer sighed. "Miserable." She said honestly. "And part of the reason for that is the fact that one of my best friends hasn't said a word to me for five years. Five years, Emily, I know she's your best friend, but…haven't you punished me enough yet? Considering that she wasn't exactly innocent, I – "

"Blaming Hanna for your mistake isn't going to get you anywhere." Emily cut her off quietly.

"Right…I'm sorry." Spencer said honestly, swallowing her pride, or at least what little of it she had left. "Look, Emily…we've been through so much together…and I know that this schism is mostly my fault. But it's been years, and I miss my friend. And if you could find it in yourself to at least ignore, if not forget, everything that's happened…I would really appreciate it. Tonight is already hard enough as it is."

Emily was quiet for a long time, before she nodded, much to Spencer's surprise. "I think I can manage that." She said softly, and before Spencer could react, she hugged her. "I miss you too."

Spencer let out a sigh of relief as she hugged Emily back. If there had been anything she'd wanted to accomplish by going there that night, it was getting Emily back. The fact that she had actually managed to do it without screwing up, before the night had really even begun was just icing on the cake.

"Emily?!" The sound of a familiar voice, however, made her fleeting moment of peace shatter around her. No. Not yet. She hadn't had nearly enough time to prepare herself. Even after seeing her this morning, she was still completely immobilized by her. After Emily had torn herself from her arms, Spencer finally forced herself to turn and look at Hanna. She looked even better than before. She'd lost the glasses and darkened her eye make-up. She'd straightened her hair. She'd slid on a shiny, gold lamé skirt and a black, long sleeved top with a modest neck. She looked fantastic. And even though Spencer knew, as everyone had assured her, that she herself hadn't changed a bit, Hanna had gone one step further and had gotten better with age.

She watched Hanna and Emily embrace, and suddenly, she was sixteen again, before any of it started, where the worst enemy she had was A and not herself. When things were simpler. When the four of them had each other, unconditionally, no matter what. A bittersweet, nostalgic pang registered in her chest, and she suddenly longed for those days, before she and Hanna were together, before any of that mess. Because at least she had friends. She had a life. And she had Hanna, even if it wasn't in the same capacity.

"Hey…" She was jerked from her reverie of simplicity as Aria set her hand on her shoulder. "Come on." She nodded her head in their direction, and before she knew it, Aria was practically pushing Spencer down the hallway towards Hanna and Emily.

"I…" The protest died on her lips as she locked eyes with Hanna and saw the same bittersweet longing for simplicity she had just experienced. She looked to Emily, and saw it there too. Aria was no different. For the first time since they'd parted ways, and for maybe the last time ever, they were connected in the same way they had been before.

And, as they converged in a four way embrace, Spencer realized that maybe this was enough.

"I'll have another." She slid her glass towards the bartender, having skipped the wine and moved onto straight, hard liquor. Even though that moment and the subsequent hour spent catching up with her friends (with surprisingly little emotional baggage brought out) had done more to make her happy than anything in the past few years, she was still left wearing amber colored glasses. (Or rather, holding one.) Emily and Paige were with the members of the swim team, Hanna had gone off with the friends she had made during the year Aria was in Iceland. Aria was god knows where. That left Spencer on the fringes of the crowd, the few people she'd managed to get close to outside of her group either not seeking her out, or just not there altogether. With a heavy sigh, she took a sip. It was just as well. She'd used up her quota of social interaction for the evening anyway.

She was either starting to come to terms with what had happened, or she was shoving it away. (The latter was far more likely.) Either that or she was stupidly drunk, and judging by the looks the bartender was giving her, that was just as likely. Not that she cared. It was making the experience a whole hell of a lot more bearable. But it also lent a certain sense of melancholy to the whole scene, like she was a hardboiled private eye from the 1940's who had a mysterious past and a dame that strung her along. She might have appreciated it if it didn't suck so much. She loved those movies.

"Sex on the beach." Spencer glanced over to see none other than Hanna sink down next to her, looking fairly glum. She derived no pleasure from this, and perhaps that was due to her current state of intoxication. She wasn't sure. But what remained was that Hanna was sad, and the small, masochistic part of her that still cared took control of her brain with full force.

"Looks like your drink order hasn't changed either." Spencer said, sliding a glance in her direction.

"Guess we're not so different after all." Hanna sighed, nodding at the bartender, sliding the class towards her, taking a long sip of the fluorescently colored drink.

"Hanna, we're polar opposites." Spencer said. "Which leaves me wondering why we're both having a miserable time. This seems like it would really be your scene."

Hanna shrugged. "I don't know. After being widowed and becoming a single mother, not to mention everything else that happened in those ten years…listening to some of these people just really pisses me off. Every time they brag about their accomplishments, their degrees, their careers, their power marriages…I just…I can't help but think about where I had imagined myself." She shook her head, swallowing hard. "I was accepted into design school, out in LA. I had everything set up. And then Wren happened. I deferred my enrollment. I deferred it again when he got sent out…I withdrew it completely when he died." She looked over at Spencer, and despite all of the heavy history between them, she saw mirrored disillusionment in her eyes, the same tiredness with life that she had been nursing for years. "You know what I do now? I manage a store at the mall. I don't even own it, I manage it. I got accepted into FIDM…and I manage a Forever 21. I live at home, with my mother, because I can't afford a decent apartment in a nice neighborhood with that paycheck. I'm not enough for Liam. He needs more than me, but I can't give that to him."

"Hanna…" Her heart broke., and not for the reasons it usually did when it came to her. "You're doing the best you can, anyone can see that. And Liam seems wonderful."

Hanna shook her head. "I don't know what to do anymore." Her eyes grew misty. "My husband is dead. I can barely support my son, and I'm not doing enough for him. He doesn't have friends. All the other kids make fun of him because he's an orphan. What even…" She sank her face into her hands for a moment. "No matter how hard I try, I can never take Wren's place in his life. I can never be everything that he needs me to be. Not even at my best, and…I haven't been at my best in a very long time." She sighed, running her hands down her face, her expression exhausted. "I should be going." She slipped off the bar stool. "I know you don't want to hear this."

"Wait." Spencer caught her arm. This wasn't Hanna, the girl that had hurt her, or the girl she had hurt. This was Hanna, the woman, who was hurting. And she was Spencer, the woman who couldn't stand it. "…you're drunk. You shouldn't be driving. We could…share a cab back to the hotel, since we're both staying there. You can even raid my minibar."

"…why are you being so nice to me?" Hanna asked, after a long moment, stepping closer to her, her light eyes locking with Spencer's dark ones, the connection prompting her to be frighteningly honest.

"I don't know." She shrugged, folding her coat over her arms. "But that doesn't matter, does it?"

"No." Hanna said, after a long moment, breaking the eye contact. For an instant, Spencer was breathless. "No, I guess it doesn't."

"Next time, remind me to go for the upgrade, this room is fabulous." Hanna said, spinning around in the desk chair, setting the bottle down on the desk – well, attempting to, anyway. Spencer winced as she heard the glass break against the floor, but she couldn't bring herself to get up and do anything about it. Her state of drunkenness had progressed to the point where she was didn't really care, and was more fascinating by the pattern on the ceiling. "Sorry."

She waved her hand dismissively. "We'll just have to remember not to step there." She finally pushed herself up into a sitting position, fluffing her hair out. "I cannot believe I walked away with your son's lion this morning, I'm so sorry."

"I can." Hanna sighed, finally stopping the chair from spinning. "I sort of dropped a few huge bombs on you, and even I didn't notice. He'll be fine, anyway, he's got enough toys." She sighed, looking up at Spencer. "You know what he wants to name it. Spencer. You made quite the impression on him."

"Really?" The dampening of her previous emotions did nothing to get rid of her slight elation at how cute that was. "He's so precious." Spencer sighed. "I don't know why you're worried about him, Hanna…he's a good little boy, you're doing wonderfully."

Hanna shrugged, letting her head loll over the back of the chair. "I just know I could be doing more." She sighed heavily. "I need to be two parents, and I barely have the time to be one…am I still spinning?"

"No." Spencer shook her head, smacking the empty area of the bed beside her. "You should lie down, I wouldn't want you trying to find your own room in this condition."

"Amen." Hanna sighed, kicking off her heels, stumbling over to the bed, stretching out beside her, folding her arms up behind her head. Spencer gazed down at her. She was just as perfect up close., although upon a closer glance, she seemed…tired. Less put together than she'd though that morning, although what she had said at the reunion had sort of thrown that into perspective for her already. But instead of how happy she thought she would be to learn that Hanna was just as miserable as she was…seeing her truly hurting only made her feel worse. "I like your hair like this." She said, reaching up, tugging a hand through the jaw length, spiked and feathered out hair cut she was wearing. "You looked good with long hair, but…this makes you look grown up. If it weren't for this, I'd still think you were seventeen."

"I cut because of you, you know." Spencer said, before she could stop herself. Hanna's expression said she wasn't going to get out of explaining that. With a sigh, she started pulling her own hand through her hair. "When I got the invitation…I knew I was inevitably going to see you again…and it was too much, and I broke down, and…ended up chopping my hair off." She shrugged. "There was alcohol involved…I was upset…I had to do something drastic that wasn't, you know, crashing my car into a tree or anything." She laughed a little to offset how suddenly sobering her sentiment was. "My hairdresser was very angry with me."

When Hanna didn't respond right away, Spencer looked over at her, and met her gaze. What she saw wasn't the self-assured, calm look she had seen that morning, or the wounded one from the reunion, or even the look clouded over by her intoxication. It was the sorrowful look of someone with regrets…of someone who had hurt someone else that they cared about. And Spencer wasn't sure if that made her feel better or worse. "I really did a number on you, didn't I?" The blonde finally asked softly, sitting up to match Spencer, facing her.

"…you broke my heart." Spencer whispered, swallowing hard. It was the first time she'd admitted it out loud, to herself or to anyone else.

"You broke mine." Hanna replied, just as softly, reaching out and tracing a light line down Spencer's forearm, leaning in, resting her forehead against hers. Spencer flinched at the contact for only a moment, before she disregarded everything in her that was screaming fowl, telling her to stop. She had never been very good at listening to those voices anyway, and the feeling was so familiar, so much reminiscent of the simplicity she craved, she couldn't help herself. "God, we really were terrible to one another, weren't we?"

"You always hurt the one you love." Spencer whispered the overplayed cliché. "Turns out we didn't need A to ruin us, we did it all on our own, just fine."

"It wasn't all bad, though, was it?" Hanna reached forward, taking Spencer's hands. Neither of them had moved, still sitting on the bed, still frighteningly close with foreheads touching, and now hands clasped. Spencer worked her fingertips up her wrist, sliding them across her skin ever so gently. Except for their breathing, the room was silent. She could have heard a pin drop.

"…it was the best time of my life." She finally whispered, her heart aching with how true it was. The times that they had been together, even considering the things they had gone through during and since then…nothing had ever been better. Not before, and not after.

"You really mean that." It wasn't a question. Knowing that, even after everything, Hanna could still trust her at the drop of a hat, over something that personal, it meant the world to her.

"Of course I do." She knew what was going to happen before it happened. And once again, every voice in her head was screaming at her to stop it, to not go there. Once again, her body had grown to fight off the potential for heartbreak like it was some sort of germ, but at that point she was so drunk and lonely and steeped in melancholy that nothing else mattered. She knew it was a bad choice, that it would be bad for her, bad for Hanna, bad for everyone in the long run. But she also knew that, in the end, she didn't really even have a choice.

For a moment, she was watching herself. Spencer had no control over it, she was just watching herself. She watched her hands slide slowly over Hanna's arms, still covered with the black fabric of her top. She watched as Hanna tensed – but not in a bad way – beneath her, as her hands moved gently over the curvature of her shoulders to her neck, and then cupping her cheeks. She felt as though she was both moving in slow motion, and impossibly swift. Her fingertips lingered on Hanna's cheeks for a moment, and she watched as her skin blushed beneath her touch, watched as Hanna's lips curved into a smile of approval.

She wanted this. They both wanted this. Maybe they even needed it. Hang the consequences.

A moment of stillness passed between them, before Spencer finally pulled Hanna close and kissed her, soft at first. The kiss was like a spark, short and sweet, almost able to be missed. But the spark, was just that – a spark. And it ignited something much more than just that short kiss. It was like it had set off a series of sparks inside her, a warmth rushing through her that she hadn't felt in years.

Suddenly, she was kissing her again, more fervently, and Hanna was kissing her too, her lips turning up against hers. Spencer removed her hands from her face to thread them through her hair, arching up on her knees on the bed, aching to be close to her. It had been an ache she'd nursed for five years now, as much as she had pushed it away or ignored it, it had always been there. She couldn't stand it any longer. She needed this. She needed her.

A soft moan echoed from the back of Hanna's throat as she wrapped her arms around her neck, pressing close to her. Spencer's stomach turned over and over and her lungs burned and her heart was racing, but there was no other feeling she wanted more There was no other place she'd rather be in that moment, no one else's arms she'd rather have pulling her close. Her hands plucked at the hemline of Hanna's top, and she worked it off over her head, burying her face in her neck, unable to get enough of her and the taste of her skin. She wrapped her arms around her now bare torso, kissing back up her jaw to her lips. "Spencer, please." Hanna turned away from the kiss, nails digging into her bare shoulders. "Don't you dare stop."

Spencer eased her down against the bed, mouth working along the line of her neck, fingertips trailing along her collarbones, longing to feel every inch of her again, to find the things about her that had changed, and the ones that had stayed the same. "Wouldn't dream of it…" She whispered against her skin, taking in her heartbeat and the sound of her breathing, the intricacies of her movements and the sounds she made as she kissed all the way back up her neck to her mouth, kissing her deeply.

This was so far beyond messed up, but Spencer couldn't care less. Now that she was remembering how well they fit together, and how good it felt to be with her, the past was nonexistent. The kiss broke for an instant, and Spencer locked eyes with Hanna, and it was like she was looking at her ten years ago, before everything had gotten in their way. It was suddenly like no time had passed, nothing had happened. Spencer knew she'd remember everything in the morning, knew she'd regret what happened, knew that this was only the beginning of a likely terrible whirlwind in her life, but in that moment, it didn't matter one bit.