Call Me When You Get This
Feeling a little braver but cautious and remembering the steps they've taken, the phone becomes a lifeline for two people who just want to be in the same room together. Kinda relates to the things happening as of June 19th or so with a little creative speculation thrown in. Underlined italics are the text messages, hope it makes sense. Title: Corrine Bailey Rae-Call Me When You Get This.
I miss you.
Natalia clutched the phone to her chest, Olivia's message staring back at her in the screen of her cell phone. Three little words. She blushed as she tucked her legs under her rear as she sat in the couch, her bottom lip clutched between her teeth as she wrote back.
Miss you back.
Olivia's phone brrpted in the pocket of her jeans, jolting her upright as she sat with Emma as she worked on a particularly tough part of the video game she was playing. She tugged the phone from her pocket, blushing furiously as she thought about the box in her nightstand. I really don't have any reason at all to use that. Really. I don't. A broad smile crossed her face as her thumbs hovered over the QWERTY keyboard of her cell phone.
Why do I get the feeling you're smiling?
Natalia smiled, her head cocked to the left, a quizzical expression knitting her eyebrows together.
Are you spying on me? What are you doing?
Olivia's phone sat on her right thigh, leaning back on her palms in bed, legs dangling over the edge as Emma played on. Her blush deepened when her cell vibrated.
Yes...I have a Nat-Tracker in the house. Emma's playing her video game and I'm just kinda sitting here, wishing you were here too.
Natalia stretched out on the couch now, her legs having grown numb from being sat on. She knew that there were thin rays of hope shining through the clouds that had seemingly appeared out of nowhere since Rafe's accidental discovery. Fine, he wasn't open to dinner, but he was open to being in the house every so often and that's really all she needed. Just to see her little boy, her son, the rest would find a way to right itself. She sighed, trying to force out abrupt way Rafe left from her mind and reminded herself of the way he showed up.
I wish I was there too. Everything makes so much sense with you around. I know it's going to be okay, not because I need it to be, but because we deserve it.
The landline rang and Emma paused the game to answer the phone before Olivia could react. She watched her daughter on the phone with one of her friends, twirling the ends of her hair around her right finger as she spoke. She wasn't a baby and she had known that Olivia and Natalia had something more than a friendship even they knew; almost as if she had a crystal ball stashed in her bedroom. She hung up the phone and beamed at her mom.
"That was Rebecca. Her mom said that she could have a sleep over. Can I go?"
"Well, sure." Olivia said with a surprised shrug. She stood up to help Emma pack but her daughter was already in her bedroom, pulling open her drawers and pulling out desired outfits. She chuckled to herself as she remembered Natalia's message. Her heart fluttered at the message.
We do deserve it don't we? Em's going to a sleepover tonight, I'll be all alone. =( Are you going to be busy?
Natalia shivered. She thought about the conversation on the porch about sex. She wasn't opposed to the idea at all but…
Rafe stopped by last night but didn't come into the house.
Her thumb hesitated to press send.
If he wasn't so interested in trying to coming over, I would say yes a thousand times over.
She read the sentences over and bit her lip. She imagined a frown on Olivia's face and immediately pictured herself kissing the worry from her face until her hard exterior softened. She her heart began to race at the idea of the two of them on the couch, close together, staring at each other, touching…
I'm going to have to owe you a night.
"Practice running away once or twice, Jellybean?" Olivia quipped as Emma emerged from her bedroom with her overnight bag packed up in no time. She expertly tied her left sneaker, using the two bunnies' method that Natalia showed her and hopped onto Olivia's bed.
"You never know when you're going to be needed." Emma answered with a smile.
"Oh really? Aren't you Miss Popular." Olivia replied, tickling Emma. Her phone vibrated on the nightstand as she smothered her daughter with a kiss. She reached over and read the message. She feigned disappointment at the response by pulling Emma into a hug. I'm going to get the nerve to tell her the right way at some point. "Is Rebecca's mom picking you up? Or do I have to chauffer little miss social butterfly over?"
"I don't know…" Emma replied with a shrug.
"Well then, Princess Jellybean, I guess I'll have to put on my fancy hat and drive you over." Olivia stood up and grabbed her car keys. "Are ya ready to go?"
Emma nodded emphatically and took her bag, slinging it over her shoulder and opening the door.
Don't worry. I'm going to drop off Emma.
She turned out the lights before adding:
I love you.
Natalia was on a cloud as she packed up some leftovers into Tupperware with the intention of taking to Rafe for lunch tomorrow. Despite the situation, the fact that Olivia stayed with her even with her own discomfort so visible it made feel like the most loved woman in the world. He's going to have to get used to it. I had to get used to it. I had to work through so much just to get here, to this point where I can say that I have someone who loves me. She cut out a large square of birthday cake and placed it in another plastic container along with some unlit candles and closed it. She stacked the leftovers one on top of the other and stood at the counter, debating her options. If I take them over to the apartment, it could start a conversation and maybe he'll want to hear me out. Or he'll want to just eat, thank me, it'll be awkward and I'll leave feeling worse than ever. She looked over at the bag Olivia and Emma brought over with his present. Rafe, it is love. It is a family. We are a family.
Scariest thing in the world, screaming little girls and a Jonas Brothers' live DVD.
Natalia giggled. She slid her phone open again and replied.
I'm sure there are scarier things in the world.
Olivia sat in her Nissan, a smirk on her face. She had dropped off Emma with a wave and a smile, watching her practically sprint into the living room to watch the DVD, already in progress. She now sat in the car, directionless and no particularly wanting to go back to The Beacon.
Name it.
Natalia thought about it as she hip checked the fridge door closed, a tall glass of cold iced tea in her right hand, cell phone in her left.
You got me.
Olivia smirked as she turned the car on and leaned into the driver's seat.
I can't afford to text and drive, as much as I love talking to you.
Natalia shook her head as she stepped out onto the porch and sat on the bench she and Olivia had their late night talks on. She sighed as she thought about how lovely it would be to have here again.
I love it when you're responsible.
Olivia kicked off her shoes and unrolled the yoga mat, determined to find some sort of balance in all the madness and chaos around her and her growing need to get her needs met. She bristled at the memory of having kissed Josh in an act of desperation but was oddly comforted by it at the same time. It didn't do anything for me and I honestly love that guy. She sighed as she sat Indian style on the mat, chewing her bottom lip thoughtfully. I'm going to have to tell her about that eventually. It's going to come out. Well it doesn't have to but I wouldn't want to know that those lips have been on someone else when they're technically mine. She sighed, inhaled slowly through her nose before exhaling slowly through her lips. We haven't even gone that far. I think the teens in this town are getting more action than I am. That thought forced Olivia on her back, extending her legs and crossing them at the ankle. Why is it that I'm willing to wait? I went through men like someone with allergies goes through tissue. I could wait for her though, I could wait, and I want to wait. I want it to be special, to mean the world to her…I want it to be the most romantic thing in the world. She shook her head. I'm really head over heels right now.
Yoga is supposed to make you calm down right?
Natalia laughed. She could hear Olivia purring the question in her ear.
That's what I hear yes. Why? Having trouble relaxing?
"You could say that." Olivia said aloud as she sat at the bar in Towers. Deciding that yoga was a bigger pain in the ass than anything else she could think of, Olivia had tossed her sneakers back on and was enjoying a martini as she fought the urge to go to the farmhouse. I have absolutely no reason why I should show up there right now. She took a sip of her drink surreptitiously before answering back.
In a manner of speaking. You have no idea how hard it is to concentrate on simple tasks with you taking up so much of the space in my head, Miss Rivera.
Natalia felt the heat rise in her cheeks as she imagined Olivia's face inches from her own, the playful seductive smile on her lips, her sea green eyes roaming her face, paying close attention to her lips before capturing her eyes and holding them intensely. What do they call that look? Smoldering?
I have some idea, Ms. Spencer. Since when do you do yoga?
And why is the idea of you being so flexible making me blush?
Olivia chewed on the last olive as another martini appeared in front of her. I have to slow down. She reminded herself with a thankful nod at the bartender.
Since I realized that I'm tense a lot of the time. I'm at Towers, care to join me?
Natalia weighed her options. She could drop off the leftovers to Frank before heading off on errands. I can also do it afterwards. I just don't want it to spoil. Or hang over my head. She grabbed her car keys and headed out.
Olivia was on her third martini when the door opened and her slowly building buzz was replaced by the heady realization that the beautiful brunette walking towards her was far more intoxicating than any amount of alcohol she could consume. She was in jeans and a simple black top but she might as well have fallen out of heaven from where Olivia stood. She gave her martini the side eye as Natalia approached her, a grin on her face, dimples anchoring it in place. Who knew I was such a poet?
"Hey you." she greeted as Natalia slid onto the barstool on Olivia's right.
"Hey." Natalia's cheeks turned beet red as she settled in next to Olivia, her smile still turned to 11.
"I didn't think you'd come." Olivia admitted, her fingertips running slowly along the stem of her martini glass.
"Why?" Natalia asked, tucking her left hand under her chin, bracing herself on her palm. "Because I'm not a serious drinker?"
"No. Well yeah, that and because you seemed nervous about our situation. I wasn't sure you'd leave the house."
"How can I say no to spending time with you?"
Olivia squinted at Natalia. "Sweet talker."
Natalia smiled broadly, nudging Olivia with her shoulder playfully. "I learned from the best."
"Who? Emma?" Olivia shot back with a chuckle. "C'mon what're you drinking?"
Natalia's face scrunched up as she eyed the bottles along the back of the bar. "I don't know. What's good?"
When you're a shameless drinker, everything. Olivia followed Natalia's gaze before letting her eyes drift back to study Natalia's profile. "Red wine?" she offered, her voice low.
"Fine with me." she replied, nodding at the bartender for a glass of red wine. She watched him pour a healthy glass of wine for her before taking it by the stem and holding it towards Olivia. "Let's make a toast." She offered with her smile brightening up the room, nearly blinding Olivia. "To the next step."
"The next step." Olivia replied, their glasses clinking together for the toast. Olivia watched Natalia take a sip of her wine as she sipped her martini slowly, the alcohol warming her already toasty insides. The wine matched her lips almost identically. "So, what exactly is the next step?"
"The next step?" Natalia echoed, her fingertips trailing along the base of the wine goblet as she chewed on the inside of her right cheek.
"Anything is possible."
"Anything? Sweetheart, a six foot tall chicken fighting a grown man in the lobby of The Beacon would be anything happening."
"That's a visual. Been falling asleep with the TV on again?"
"Once or twice…" Olivia chuckled as she scooted her seat closer to Natalia. She caught Natalia's gaze and held it intently. "I told you, sometimes I have trouble sleeping or relaxing." she said innocently, a coy smile dancing across her lips.
"Is that why you've taken to doing yoga?" Natalia replied, feeling like there was a double meaning hidden in Olivia's comments.
"Well, yeah." Yeah, stick with that answer. Nothing about the box in the nightstand.
Natalia giggled and Olivia's knees turned to liquid. She took another sip from her martini, her right hand sitting on Natalia's knee discreetly hidden. Natalia cast her eyes down at Olivia's hand as it sat innocently on her left knee, the warmth radiating from her palm. It was a bold move considering how public a place Towers is and how often so many of the denizens of Springfield went there for dinner and a drink. Natalia blushed as she caught Olivia watching her.
"Couldn't help it." Olivia whispered, moving her hand away slowly.
"It's what comes next isn't it?" Natalia whispered back, her voice throaty as her right hand rested in Olivia's upturned palm, their fingers lacing instantly.
"Is it?" is this considered first base? "I'm glad you came to meet me." Olivia blushed as she stared at Natalia, the room seeming to dim, leaving the two of them alone.
"So am I." Natalia admitted, feeling the warmth from the wine loosening her limbs. She took another sip and held it on her tongue for a moment before swallowing. The warmth crept down her spine and traveled through her fingers. She released her grasp on Olivia's hand and drew lazy circles in her palm, her head tilted slightly to the left, her bangs swooping lazily over her chocolate brown eyes. Olivia instinctively reached over and brushed the bangs away from her eyes, her fingertips grazing her cheek softly. Their eyes fluttered at the feather-light contact and Olivia drew her edge of her bottom lip between her teeth, holding it as she watched Natalia exhale slowly. They swallowed hard and Olivia reached for her martini, hoping the sting would ebb some of her hurt. She just wanted to pull her close and kiss her. Taste her. Touch her. "Olivia…" Natalia whispered, "Slow down. That's not water."
"It's a liquid…" Olivia replied as she popped an olive into her mouth. I think I'm developing an oral fixation…She gave Natalia a tight lipped smile as she chewed, some of the alcohol swishing around with the bits of olive. "I'm fine. Finish your wine. Hungry?" she replied in one breath.
"Sort of…" Natalia made a face, the wine obviously sloshing around in a semi-empty stomach mixing with the growing tension between them made her feel nervous. I know my limit with liquor but I don't know my limit with liquor and Olivia.
Olivia slid easily from the barstool, years of practice having given her the ability to do it with the grace of a dancer. She scanned the dining area for an available table, preferably in the darkest, most secluded area of the restaurant. She found it in the far corner of the elevated dining area and lead the way towards it, Natalia following her. "How's this working for you?" she asked as she pulled out the chair for Natalia.
"What? Your chivalry? It's cute."
"Cute? Next time, I'll let the door slam in your face." Olivia joked as Natalia scooted close to the table. Olivia took her seat across from Natalia and opened the menu, already knowing what she was planning on getting. "Thank you."
"For?"
"Just. Being you." Natalia replied with a shrug as she opened her menu and browsed through it.
Olivia sighed as she watched Natalia finish the last of the ice cream sundae they were sharing, her tongue sliding along the cool metal spoon. Natalia put the spoon in the center of the bowl next to Olivia's before she caught Olivia's eyes on her.
"What? Do I have ice cream on me?" Natalia asked self-consciously covering her face with her right hand and reaching for her napkin with the left.
"No, you're clean for once." Olivia joked as she took a sip of her water.
"What do you mean for once?"
"You're a messy eater is all…" Olivia said with a playful shrug.
"I think you look for excuses to touch me…" Natalia answered back, "I'm a very clean eater." She reached for the bill but Olivia grabbed it before Natalia's fingers could touch it, chiding her as she opened it. "Olivia…"
"I invited you." Olivia said simply, pulling out one of her cards and sliding it into the card holder. "So there."
Natalia's shoulders slumped in mock defeat. "Fine. But when I start my new position…"
"Natalia." Olivia cut in as she signed the bill and tucked everything away in her pocket. "I just want time with you, that's all. Dinner, drinks, walking in the park, planting flowers, whatever just as long as I get to be near you. It's not about money, the how or what, just us." she said firmly as she watched Natalia's body language shift. "Ok?"
Natalia nodded simply, watching Olivia as she stood up and straightened herself up. She pulled out Natalia's chair again and smiled as she stood, their faces inches from each other. "It's still cute."
"So are you." Olivia quipped.
Olivia walked Natalia to her car, which was conveniently parked right next to Olivia's. She walked slowly, ambling next to Natalia before reaching to take her right hand with her left holding it securely. It never ceased to amaze her how easy it was to fall in step with Natalia, how easily it was to just lose all of her inhibitions and fears as long as she was around. Her hands are always so soft and warm…like she's always inviting me in. They stood in the parking lot between their two cars, neither wanting to let go of the other. Natalia studied Olivia's face as Olivia did the same, tiny invisible-unless-you-knew-to-look- hearts floating around their heads as though they were in a giant snow globe in the shape of a parking area in Springfield. Natalia's free hand drifted to tuck a strand of hair behind Olivia's left ear, her fingertips brushing Olivia's jaw line. She blushed.
The fingers of Olivia's left hand wound around the ends of Natalia's hair as it lay on her shoulder. It felt like silk to her and Olivia found it almost impossible that there could be anything softer than the woman standing in front of her. "It's funny…" she breathed, her voice husky as she watched her fingers weaving Natalia's hair absently before bringing them to meet Natalia's gaze. "I never really appreciated the time we had together in the farmhouse until I moved out…"
"I did…I always did." Natalia said, taking a small step closer toward Olivia. "I couldn't take that for granted, it was the happiest time of my life."
Olivia blushed. "I meant that I don't think I looked at you as much as I do now. I miss you everyday and now that you resigned, I feel like…every moment is more precious and I don't want them to end."
"I know." Natalia let herself be pulled into Olivia's arms, her head resting in the crook of her neck. "Which is why the professional distance makes the personal closeness better…isn't that what we agreed?" She felt Olivia's cheek rest against the topmost part of her head, her lips pressed into her hair.
"Yeah. Doesn't mean it's any fun." Olivia replied, a frown on her face.
"Bet you appreciate me more though."
"I always appreciate you Natalia."
The honesty in Olivia's eyes and voice broke Natalia's heart. "I know you do…"
They stared at each other for a moment, hearts racing a mile a minute. "I love you, you know that." Olivia said, breaking the silence between them and pulling Natalia in for a deep hug. She sighed heavily before relinquishing her grip on Natalia, kissing her forehead softly as she did so.
"I know you do. And I don't forget it."
Olivia stretched on the yoga mat again, determined to find the synergy and chakra aligning chi that the activity promised but all she could do was think about how she had been on her first date with Natalia and hadn't had the courage to kiss her. Frustrated, she stopped her warrior's stance, shook out her arms and legs and shut off the cd. She flopped into bed and stared at the drawer of the nightstand as though it's mere presence was the most annoying thing in the world.
She replayed the evening in her mind as she went through her routine of turning off virtually every light except the TV and bedside lamp and flopped back into bed. All the signs were there, the signs that read 'yes, let's do this, waiting is over-rated and I'm done with it' but the actions, the actions…the actions said something completely different. She wanted to be as close as possible but didn't know what I wanted and…that's the problem. We don't know what comes with the territory of I love you…Olivia fidgeted with her cell phone as it sat in the cradle of her lap, dark and silent. It's not the sex. We both want the sex. GOD knows I want the sex. It's the other parts. The touching. How far do we go? How much do we give? The kisses…except for on the cheek when we can sneak them they're never anywhere near their desired targets. I could kiss her for hours. I know I could. She bit her lip and punched up Natalia on her phone. She stared at the caller id photo, realizing that the photo didn't do her justice. She was smiling directly at the camera, dimples in full effect. Emma had taken the photo when she had taken Olivia's phone. Smart kid.
I think about kissing you. All the time. I was thinking about it when I did it after Em's presentation and I just went for it because if I think too much on anything I lose nerve. I wanted it and I found myself wanting more.
She hit send then continued. Stupid 160 character limit. Whose idea was that?!
I think about just listening to you laugh at something & how much I love your cooking & the way you always make things with love. You always amaze me because every time you feel lost, you find your way again.
You see the beauty in things when everyone else only sees the worst things, including me. I know you quitting was for us but I wish you hadn't because I have no real reason to look forward to going to work besides doing my job well.
I spend a lot of time wondering how you took over me the way you did & I realize that I wouldn't be who I am now if it wasn't for you. I wouldn't be alive.
Besides the fact that my heart works fine, it feels like its more because it has something better to do besides keep me alive; it's loving you & I have to say, it's doing a great job. I'll be awake for awhile. Call me when you get this.