I know that Stephenie has already started the story of Twilight from Edward's perspective in Midnight Sun, and I do hope that she manages to finish it. However, I wanted to capture my own thoughts about what could have been running through Edward's mind after James' attack, and I therefore wrote this small one-shot.
xoxoxo
!-- page { margin: 2cm } P { margin-bottom: 0.21cm } --
As I lifted Bella in my arms, I felt the monster within me withdraw into nothingness. At that moment, I knew that I had beaten it. As Carlisle placed his hand on my shoulder, I felt a surge of pride. Despite all of my initial thoughts and fears, I had tasted the sweetest blood, and, like my father had done so often before me, I had been able to keep myself under control, and had managed to restrain from killing the one I loved. I didn't even look back to watch as Jasper and Emmett killed the monster who had almost taken the one precious thing in my existence from me. As I gently slid into the back of the car we had stolen at the airport with Bella safely in my arms, I knew, for once in my life, that I had won.
However, as Carlisle drove us to the hospital, fear started to creep into my mind. I knew that, if it weren't for me, Bella wouldn't be in this current condition. I knew that, if I had never given in to the demands of my selfish side, Bella would still be safe in Forks, more than likely tucked up in bed, on the road to going to Prom with Mike Newton - I shuddered at the thought - or someone similar. If I had been strong enough to stay away from her, like I had told myself I should, Bella would probably never have met James, and her life never would have been in danger. We arrived at the hospital in record time, of course, and I barely listened to the story Carlisle fed to the woman on the reception desk, never once letting go of Bella until we were safe inside one of the cubicles. I reluctantly left her side when the doctor's took her into theatre to give her a blood transfusion, and Carlisle repeated to me the story he had given the receptionist. Handing me Bella's cell - which he had recovered from Bella's pocket when he had been fixing up her leg - so that I could call Charlie and Renee.
Of course, Charlie was furious, blaming me completely, as he should. He told me he was going to catch the first flight from Forks, and demanded that, once we all returned to Forks, I leave Bella alone from then on. Renee, on the other hand, believed the story I had fed her, and didn't blame me one bit. She was also on her way to Phoenix, although Phil was remaining in Florida. After making the calls, I returned to Carlisle, who informed me that Bella was out of theatre. He took me to her private room, one he had managed to obtain for her due to his reputation, no doubt, and I never left her side. It took a while for her blood to return to its normal scent, and I didn't like it one bit. Didn't the doctors know what they were doing to me, by changing her scent? Once Charlie and Renee arrived, I still didn't leave; however, I feigned sleep in order to blend into the category of a 'normal' human. I waited anxiously for her to wake up, knowing that I would be forced to break both our hearts, though mine was no longer beating, once she did. When, from across the room, I noticed her eyelashes starting to flutter, I took a deep, unnecessary breath, and was at her side in a second, bracing myself for what I was about to do, but knowing that there was no alternative option.
Please do take the time to review, as I value all of your opinions!