Title: Seven
Author: J.K. Rowling…not! :P Sarah Terrance
Beta Reader: Some editor at the publishing company J.K. uses -snicker- Maddie Bull
Rating: T
Pairing: Fred/George, but it's not incest. It's just that I lumped them together as one person. But they're still known as two separate people.
Summary: One Hogwarts character for each of the seven deadly sins. :P
Note: Read 'author' and 'beta reader' and you'll figure out what goes here. If you don't…JKR owns HP and everyone and everything in it, and not me.
WARNING: HERE BE CUSSING.
Lust.
I hate myself for loving you
Can't break free from the things that you do
I wanna walk but I run back to you
That's why I hate myself for loving you
--Joan Jett and the Black Hearts, I Hate Myself For Loving You
Hermione Granger, though she tried to deny it desperately, had the sin of lechery, more commonly known as lust. Whether it was Ron Weasley or Viktor Krum—the only men she ever truly had feelings for—she had the sin of covetousness whenever she saw them.
She also acquired—for a brief period of time—the sin of envy when Ronald Weasley and Lavender Brown were considered 'an item'.
Yes, lust was a terrible thing to have—she knew the feeling well—but she wouldn't deny that she was experiencing it herself. That's why she hated herself for falling in love—or did she fall in like? Or fall in lust? The latter was a less used expression but it fit perfectly in her opinion—with Ron Weasley and Viktor Krum.
Hell, she fell in love—or like (or lust)—easily. But when she eventually married Ron, it wasn't lust. It was love.
Gluttony
Take us the foxes
The little foxes
That spoil the vines:
For our vines have tender grapes
--The Holy Bible, Song of Solomon 2:15
Ronald Weasley loved sweets the way others loved a person or pet.
He was very gluttonous, choosing to eat rather than be worried when his best friend of six years Harry Potter went missing at the beginning of his sixth year at Hogwarts. His reward? His other best friend of six years, Hermione Granger, smacked him with a book. And she yelled, "Can you—stop—eating—your best friend—is missing!"
He didn't stop eating. :P
Also, he longed more than anything to come from a wealthy wizarding family—the more money to buy sweets with. Ah, sweets…the greatest thing ever put on earth. He had discovered them when his prankster brothers Fred and George had made toffees when he was nine that had a levitating charm on them. They had made them in Potions on the last day of their first year of Hogwarts.
They were good…until Ron floated up to the ceiling.
Then they were fantastic.
Greed.
Money get away
Get a good job with good pay and you're okay
Money it's a gas
Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash
New car, caviar, four star daydream
Think I'll buy me a football team
--Pink Floyd, Money
Dudley Dursley wasn't a wizard—never was, never would be. However, he was exceptionally greedy.
There were minor things; having a fit about having one less gift for his birthday than the year before was a little one. There were, however, things that weren't so great, such as his needing a second bedroom for his things.
It was true that his parents spoiled him—it was obvious if you took one step into the home of the Dursleys. At first, the attention bothered him, as he knew he only got the attention so that his cousin Harry wouldn't have any attention. But then he realized, the feeling, it felt so good…
He became possessive of all of his things and toys. Everything he had, if Harry so much as laid a finger on it, he'd practically attack him. Oh, yes, that just screamed greed.
Every little thing that could be owned, he become territorial of. Money, toys (in his younger years), games…anything.
Then he met his wife, and he realized there were more important things in life than money.
That's when he got his first paycheck. Then money was the main thing in his life.
Sloth.
I'll wait and I'll sit and watch
The clouds as they go by
I'll wait and I'll sit and watch
The clouds as they go by
I have a sensation with laziness
Procrastination is what I do best
I'll wait
--NOFX, Lazy
Fred and George Weasley weren't lazy in the best sense of the word. True, like everyone else, they liked to sit back, relax, and put their feet up.
A lot.
The only time they didn't put their feet up was when pranking people, whether it be a practical joke or their prank toys, sweets, and various other items. But a lot of that involved their moments of rest, too. They'd sit in their chairs, racking their brains for ideas, and their feet would be propped up on the table.
Typical Fred and George behavior.
The only movement outside of making their pranks that they seemed to enjoy was playing Quidditch.
And as soon as the match was over…they'd go straight back to their dormitories to sleep for about five hours.
Wrath
WARNING: HERE BE CUSSING.
Get in the ring motherf*cker
And I'll kick your bitchy little ass
Punk
I don't like you
I just hate you
I'm gonna kick your ass
Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!
--Guns N Roses, Get in the Ring
Pansy Parkinson was, in short, an evil little bitch.
She learned this trade not just from being in Slytherin, a house typically reserved for the mean, but also from her boyfriend, Draco Malfoy.
In fact, she was almost as nasty—or even nastier—than Draco himself. She would call people names, such as "fat little crybaby". She would also degrade other girls who she thought less of ("Stunningly pretty? Her? What was she judging against, a chipmunk?" or even, "Hey, Johnson, what's with that hairstyle, anyway? Why would anyone want to look like they've got worms coming out of their head?" ). And, moreover, she'd tease people facing hardships in their life ("Hey, Potter! Potter! The Dementors are coming, Potter! Woooooooo!").
She was pretty much the female counterpart of Draco Malfoy.
So why does Pansy represent wrath, and not Draco? Because later in life, Draco became more understanding of people and less vicious, while Pansy never changed her ways.
That evil little bitch.
Envy
Anything you can do
I can do better
I can do anything
Better than you
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can
No you can't
Yes I can
Yes I can
--Annie Oakley and Frank Butler, Anything You Can Do
Even people with ridiculously cool names (Lord Voldemort! Come on, that's f*cking awesome!) have deadly sins against them.
Sorry, Voldy. (Damn! That's so cool!)
Yup, Voldemort was jealous. He was jealous of the pure bloods. He was jealous that he wasn't a pure blood. He didn't like being half-blood. It made him feel horrible. Like we was worth…nothing. And yet he was put in Slytherin, despite being a half-blood.
Jealousy got the better of him and later in life he refused to be called Tom Marvolo Riddle ever again, assuming the alias Lord Voldemort ( :D it's f*cking super!). Yep. That's what made him a mass murderer. The fact that he was envious of all pure-bloods.
But we all know that all he needed was a big old hug.
So if you ever see Voldy here, lay it on him—give him a big hug! Maybe he'll feel better… ;P
Pride
WARNING: HERE BE MAJOR SEXINESS.
I'm too sexy for my shirt
Too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan
Too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
--Right Said Fred, I'm Too Sexy
Okay, now that we've addressed that DRACO MALFOY IS EXTREMELY SEXY, ;) I need to address the real issue here:
Draco is very vain.
He takes pride in the fact that he's pure-blood (don't give me that look, Voldy!). He takes pride in the fact that he's sexy (fan girls: swoon). He takes pride in the fact that he's a Slytherin, because he has to be at Hogwarts anyway. And he takes pride in the fact that he's not wearing underwear today.
Oh.
Whoops.
Not supposed to say that…
Anywhore, he's very…self-centered. Vain. -cough cough SEXY cough cough- And a little naïve, too.
Naïve that people don't agree that he's the best.
Yes, people don't agree that he's the best. (And to that, I say, WHAT THE FU—BOOM! –explosion-.) And why shouldn't they?
Because apparently people don't agree with Draco (and me) that he's amazing. But Draco agrees with this (la duh), and won't rest until everyone on the face of the earth—or at least every witch and wizard in the world—realizes this fact…
And realizes his amazing sexyness.
Fin.
Okay, I got waaaay carried away with talking about Draco's sexyness! :P but look at him and you'll see why! I mean—DAMN! He must be f*cking Satan (Satan, the devil, was of course a tyrant and he was also the most beautiful angel—yeah, SATAN WAS AN ANGEL. DEAL WITH IT), man!
So please review this crazyness. :P