Hello all, so one reader suggested this conversation and I felt that yeah, it totally needed to be written.
For anyone looking forward to both the Mikey/Sabrina one shot as well as the Donatello offshoot, they will be happening. Working on them right now:)
But until they are finished, I hope you guys will enjoy this little one shot.
Thank you to Marie Allen for being awesome and Beta reading this chapter for me! Thank you so much!
And now, please enjoy!
Raphael furtively glanced over at his brother, who was looking out across green rolling hills that were dwarfed by the breathtaking vista of steep, shadowed, snow-capped mountains rising up through wispy clouds in the far distance.
It had been a few days since his family had descended upon them and it was the first time since the kitchen encounter that he and Leonardo had been alone.
It was strange because even after their conversation, Raphael still felt apprehensive and uncomfortable in his oldest brother's presence.
The truth was that even though he had seen with his own eyes his older brother's obvious love of Elizabeth, he still felt guilty about stealing Catherine away from him. Leonardo had forgiven him and was glad of the way things had turned out, but Raphael knew that he would not be able to forgive himself as easily as his brother had.
"It's really beautiful here," Leonard observed interrupting the quiet that had stretched between them. It hadn't been an uncomfortable silence, but it was one that was fraught with a certain amount of portent, as if this particular outing was more than it appeared to be.
Raphael hadn't been surprised when Leonardo had asked him if there were any good hiking spots, knowing that his brother loved the outdoors as much as the rest of them. But what had surprised him was Leonardo's wish for them to go out together; just the two of them.
Packing a quick lunch, Beowulf following close on their heels, Raphael had led them through the bush to the high hill they were currently standing upon.
Their conversation on the trail up had been light, mostly regarding mundane things such as the weather, the scenery and Beowulf's antics. But now, Raphael had an uncomfortable feeling that his brother wanted to talk; most likely about something serious, personal, or both.
Letting out a huff of air, Raphael agreed to with his brother's statement as he dug around in the bag he had brought, offering his brother a beer.
"No thank you," Leonardo declined politely.
Raphael smirked. "Sorry, I don't have any of your fancy sake," before musing, "Actually, I'm pretty sure I couldn't even get it if I wanted to. This place is great, but the selection of…well…anything is pretty limited," he admitted with a shrug. "Unless you want beer." There were about fifty different kinds of beer, none of them American, most of them from breweries Raphael had never heard of, and good portion of them weren't half bad.
"I don't drink sake anymore," Leonardo admitted, taking the proffered bottle of water Raphael handed him.
"Really?" he asked curiously. "Elizabeth turn you into a wine snob or something?" Raphael wondered, knowing of the older sister's love of wine.
Leonardo gave a faint smile. "No, I don't drink alcohol at all anymore," he admitted.
"Really?" he asked in disbelief. He knew Leonardo had never been a huge drinker, but had imbibed on the occasional alcoholic beverage. And considering Elizabeth's love of wine, he found it strange that his brother had cut it out completely.
Leonardo's smile turned wry. "Even if I hadn't decided on my own that I should stay away from alcohol, Mikey banned me for life."
Raphael looked down at his beer and suddenly felt sick. "Oh," he said softly wondering if Leonardo, after learning that the woman he loved had run away with his brother, had crawled inside the bottom of a bottle, numbing away the pain of betrayal and heartache with alcohol.
Knowing his oldest brother like he did, he wouldn't think that Leonardo would become an alcoholic, but he could only imagine how hurt, angry and confused Leonardo must have been in the aftermath of Catherine storming the lair
"It's nothing as serious as that," Leonardo assured him with a shake of his head, apparently divining his thoughts. "More… I realized that I have a tendency to make grave errors in judgement when I am under the influence and Mikey strongly agreed. And I found I didn't enjoy the hangovers."
Raphael snorted. "You ain't supposed to drink 'till you get stupid drunk," he pointed out, wondering what their baby brother had to do with the alcohol ban.
Leonardo gave him a self-depreciating smile, taking several gulps of water before staring at the plastic container as if it was suddenly incredibly interesting.
Swallowing, Raphael waited, knowing that his brother was either about to divulge something important or ask something important.
"It's hard to believe that you're getting married," Leonardo observed softly.
Raphael felt his muscles tense, not expecting his brother to want to talk about the ceremony and the fact that he was marrying his brother's ex-girlfriend. "Uh…yeah," he replied awkwardly, knowing that those words didn't quiet express his feelings about what was happening at all.
"Did you ever think that you'd have a wife?" Leonardo asked him as he stared out over the green grass that stretched before them, his tone heavy, not sad but…something.
"Wife sounds so-" Raphael began, caught off-guard by the question.
"Grown up?" Leonardo interjected.
"-human," Raphael finished.
His answer seemed to stun his brother, who gave him his full attention. Flustered and embarrassed, Raphael shifted, taking a drink of beer and finding that he didn't really want it anymore.
Placing the beer at his feet, he crossed his arms over his chest and looked at the mountains that painted the sky in light and dark hues of blue.
"You know none of us ever thought about bein' with a human," Raphael pointed out. "Especially me," he admitted gruffly. "But…married?" he tasted the word on his tongue and still found it odd, almost uncomfortable, like he was playing pretend and trying to be something other than he was. "She's my mate," Raphael told his brother, a growl of protective, possessiveness entering his voice.
"Mate?" Leonardo seemed to think about this word before giving a nod of comprehension.
"Makes more sense than wife," Raphael admitted with a shrug. "Don't need the whole ceremony thing either. I mean…I get it. It's nice to have that and all you guys there, but…" he trailed off, uncomfortable with his thoughts, "It won't be real. We won't really be married. But…she is my mate."
"It's still nice," Leonardo offered.
"Yeah" Raphael agreed. "I only wish Master Splinter coulda been here and have met Catherine."
Leonardo was silent a moment before nodding, his face somber. "Me too," he said. "But I know he'd be happy for you, proud of you, and I know he would have liked Catherine."
Raphael gave a weak smile of acknowledgement, knowing that his father would not have been proud of all of his actions.
They lapsed into another silence, their thoughts heavy and contemplative.
Pushing away his regrets and his grief, Raphael waited, knowing that as much as he wished for his brother to be done talking, that he wasn't. Leonardo hadn't gotten around to the reason for their little impromptu excursion just yet.
"I was supposed to fix things with Elizabeth, who had been avoiding me for three months," his brother began, his words catching Raphael off guard at their subject, but Leonardo had his full attention as he continued. "Instead, I decided I couldn't deal with doing this seemingly impossible task, so I had decided to drown my sorrows in sake," Leonardo began and Raphael frowned in confusion at his brother's admission.
"I was quite drunk when Elizabeth happened upon me, and I asked her if she wanted to get drunk with me. She declined, only to come back a moment later and sit down, drinking the sake straight from the bottle. I was horrified, but followed her lead. That was when she admitted to me that Catherine was in love with you, something I had suspected but hadn't allowed myself to accept." Leonardo slid a glance his way and Raphael felt himself freeze, unable to meet his brother's eyes as a wave of guilt rose up and strangled him.
"Elizabeth had been avoiding me because she knew and believed that if she told me I would stop looking for Catherine. I never would of course, believing you to still be dangerous, but Elizabeth's admission stung. We were both so angry, lost, hurt and confused. I woke up in the morning with Elizabeth stretched out naked beside me, tiny remembrances of the night before floating around in my abused brain. Elizabeth was horrified, as was I. I knew she had feelings for me, had admitted that she was in love with me, and I hated myself because I took advantage of her. Though she claims she took advantage of me, so perhaps it was mutual." Leonardo paused and Raphael didn't interrupt, though he was tempted to say something in regards to his brother having a drunken one night stand, he didn't dare, feeling as if his and Catherine's actions had driven Leonardo over some kind of moral brink.
"To make matters worse, Mikey walked in on us," Leonardo informed him and this pronouncement caused Raphael to break his previous guilt-stricken silence.
"Mikey walked in? When you two were completely naked together?" he wondered incredulously, not sure if he should laugh or feel sorry for all involved.
"You can imagine how well that went," Leonardo's words were sarcastic. "Besides the mortification, embarrassment and the horror of being caught in such a compromising position, Mikey was…furious with me, believing that I had taken advantage of Elizabeth."
Raphael felt himself nodding in commiseration for both brothers and the awkward situation they had all been placed in. "But you didn't because when you and Liz hooked up, you figured out that you weren't in love with Catherine," Raphael stated, his guilt over stealing Catherine away lessening.
Leonardo glanced at Raphael, his eyes dark and losing their earlier mirth.
Caught by his brother's gaze, Raphael found he couldn't look away. "No. I loved Catherine." Raphael felt himself recoil inwardly in response. "Sleeping with Elizabeth didn't change that, it only made my actions even more deplorable," Leonardo intoned softly. "I didn't know how to repair the damage I had done, but Mikey gave some good advice in this regard and I took it. Elizabeth and I had always had an…odd sort of relationship. I had always been attracted to her, but she made me uncomfortable. She constantly provoked me, embarrassed me, flirted with me, and I never knew who she really was. I didn't dislike her or her company, but I found it…taxing at times to be in her presence. She was always so wild, carefree, spontaneous and dangerous, and she and Catherine both had the ability to cause me to become reckless, but Elizabeth was the one who taught me that being occasionally careless could be okay."
"So….she managed to pry the giant stick out of your ass?" Raphael wondered, knowing that it was not a time for jokes or well placed jabs -his brother's words were insightful, introspective and serious- but for some reason, the words slipped out anyway.
Leonardo seemed surprised by his remark, but gave a self-depreciating smile. "I suppose so," he said, glancing at Raphael before looking out into the distance again.
"All Elizabeth wanted was for Catherine to be happy," Leonardo stated, "no matter where that happiness lay, and she wanted to be overjoyed for Catherine, knowing that she had obviously found a love so profound, that she left everyone and everything behind so that she could fight for that love, but she couldn't, because Catherine had chosen you."
Raphael flinched at this. It wasn't surprising or anything less than he deserved, but he liked to think that he spent every hour of every day making up for his past sins, and that he proved to Catherine over and over again that she had no reason to ever regret her choice, or ever question the strength of his love or devotion to her.
"For a while, I agreed with her," Leonardo continued, "and all we could hold onto while looking for both of you was the belief that Catherine was still alive."
Feeling a different sort of blame assault him, he felt the words tumble from his mouth; completely sincere and contrite. "I never meant to worry…" he rethought what he was about to say, but Leonardo spoke before he could.
"There were days when none of us believed we would see either of you again. Even Mikey and Donny felt the strain of uncertainty, but...we couldn't dwell on it. We all needed to move on with our lives. We wouldn't stop searching until we found you, but we had to move forward," Leonardo offered in a voice that seemed unsure, as if he harboured some amount of guilt in regards to his actions, but Raphael wasn't sure because his brother suddenly gave him a self-depreciating grin laced with embarrassment.
"I had asked Elizabeth out after the whole sake incident, because I wanted to understand why I would do what I had done. I didn't want to feel as if I had used her and I knew there was always this spark between us, but she turned me down. We weren't in a good place, either of us, but we were more often than not in each other's company. I discovered that she balanced me out, which considering Elizabeth's personality, is…surprising," Leonardo said with a soft chuckle, and Raphael couldn't help the smile that crossed his own face. "She reminds me not to take myself so seriously and she makes me laugh. She has this energy and passion and…life about her, and I can only watch her with a struck kind of awe that makes me feel as if I am standing still and missing out on everything that is going on around me."
Raphael felt his eyes narrowing in thoughtful suspicion. "So how much have you tried to change her?" he wondered curiously.
Leonardo quirked a smile. "She remains impetuous, impatient, abrasive, and maddening and I love her more for it."
Raphael felt his mouth gape a little at this and Leonardo laughed at his expression.
Raphael couldn't help but laugh with his older brother at the irony. "So basically," he began, "we're both masochists," he stated with sardonic conviction. "The more they drive us crazy, the more we love them."
"Apparently," Leonardo answered dryly as an unsettled silence stretched between them.
Raphael understood that Leonardo had shared how he and Elizabeth had 'happened', and now his brother was waiting for Raphael to reciprocate.
Leonardo wanted his confession.
His brother had even told his story first, which ran counter to what he had said a few days earlier, stating that he would tell Raphael how he and Elizabeth had gotten together if Raphael told him first how he and Catherine had happened.
Leonardo had perhaps believed that if he withheld his story, Raphael's curiosity would get the better of him and would give an account as to how he had ended up winning Catherine's heart.
Only, no amount of curiosity would be enough to tempt him to open that Pandora's Box.
He and Leonardo were in a good place, something that probably hadn't happened in years; if ever. And he found himself extremely reluctant to destroy that newfound camaraderie and familial bond by recounting –in detail- his betrayal.
But as the silence stretched out between them, he realized that he had no choice. Leonardo had been the first to extend the metaphorical olive branch, and Raphael knew that his brother would not have done so if he wasn't able to bear the knowledge of the truth.
Letting out a slow breath, Raphael reached down and stroked Beowulf's head, the wolf-dog's tail wagging in happy response.
There had been more than a few times when he had pondered what he would tell Leonardo given the chance. He of course had never believed that his brother would forgive him and that his imagined conversations would never be spoken. But now… he honestly didn't know where to start. The beginning? The middle? The end?
"I loved Catherine from the very first moment I saw her," he stated and Raphael gathered the courage to look straight into his brother's eyes.
His words apparently shocked Leonardo because his brow ridges rose in surprise. Leonardo offered no comment and Raphael continued. "When she barrelled into me and we both went tumbling down the steps of the Brownstone, I looked at her and she stared back at me and I felt like the wind was knocked completely outta me."
Shifting uncomfortably, he distracted himself by looking out at a hawk that soared high overhead. "I ignored the hell outta what I felt. It was stupid. I didn't know who the hell she was and I didn't want to know. You were moping all over the place because you liked her and missed her, so I wasn't gonna go there. She had a twin sister who was totally more my speed, I wasn't gonna complain." Raphael crossed his arms over his chest and shrugged.
"When I grabbed Elizabeth in the hall and kissed her, I convinced myself that it was an accident, and it was; only I didn't stop kissing her even when I realized it was Catherine. You guys weren't a thing yet and I pretended it was no harm no foul. But… if there was ever a moment when things…changed between us, that would be it." He met his brother's eyes, and he placed an apology there. He knew things had worked out for the best and that his brother and Catherine believed that things would never have worked out between them anyway and that Leonardo was happy and in love with Elizabeth, but it still didn't excuse his actions or the hurt he had caused.
There was also still a small part of him that always wondered if Catherine and Leonardo told themselves that things would never have worked out between them because it was better than continually asking 'what if?'
"I always wonder… I still wonder," Raphael amended, "if I hadn't kissed her that day, if things would have turned out differently…" his voice trailed off after giving voice to one of his deepest regrets and insecurities.
"Raph-" Leonardo offered softly and Raphael waved off whatever his brother was going to say, he didn't need to hear it.
"I knew that Catherine didn't want anything to do with me and I was still in denial and planning to stay as far away from her as I could get. I was determined to hate her and I tried everything I could think of to push her away and make her hate me as much as I believed I hated her. Only it didn't work. She just…wouldn't leave me alone. She didn't even push back. Not really. It was more like she just sidestepped everything I threw at her and walked right up to me, completely unconcerned and unfazed by everything that happened and was happening. She saw straight through me, saw how broken and angry and dangerous I was, and she still tried to help me."
Raphael swallowed roughly, knowing that this confession was going to be even more agonizing than the first one given days ago. "She was in my head, and she was lodged in my heart and I couldn't get her out of either, and I finally had to admit that I had feelings for her. But I swore to myself that I would never act on my feelings. She was in love with you and you were in love with her and I believed that I would never do anything to betray you. But the night in the alley when Donny had me follow Catherine home, I did." Raphael glanced over at his brother to read the expression on his face and see if the words that were tumbling out of his mouth wounded his brother as much as it hurt for him to speak them.
Leonardo's face remained carefully neutral, but there was a pained sadness that played about at the corners of his eyes.
Looking away, Raphael admitted, "I was twisted into so many knots with the warnings about Karai and I knew you were hiding something, and I was so relieved when the man who had followed Catherine had been nothing but a lost tourist, that I kissed her. I knew you loved her, she was your girlfriend, and I didn't care. That was the moment I knew how deep I was in; how much I loved her," he looked at his brother, his gaze piecing, the sick, clawing guilt that always assailed him when he recalled his actions caused his throat to close with shame, but he managed to squeeze the words out anyway. "Enough to betray you."
Leonardo appeared shaken by his revelation and opened his mouth to speak, but he waved Leonardo's words away, he wasn't finished yet.
"I didn't want to take her from you," he told his brother honestly. "I wanted her to be with you. I wasn't good for her or good enough for her and I knew she loved you. "
Everything he had said so far had been hard to speak. It was hard for him to remember the events that had happened; the depths of his destructive depression and his brutal thoughtless and violent actions.
Dragging a hand down his face, he ground out in a pained voice, "I watched her fight for me -fight for my life- when I was just lying in that alley waiting to die; wanting to die. I wanted her to stop, to leave me alone and go and live her life with you, love you, be happy with you," he told his brother fiercely. "I had hurt her, left her permanently scarred and was completely mentally unstable. But she wouldn't stop fighting. She saved me anyway, almost at the cost of her own life." His voice caught in his throat as he remembered the gunshots that had pierced the veil of his near unconscious mind, and shattered his heart. "But she was alive and unharmed and I decided that I was going to make her mine. She was yours and I-"
"She wasn't," Leonardo interrupted his voice soft and regretful. "I let her go."
"Because of me!" Raphael snarled back. "You broke her heart because of me."
"I didn't break her heart," Leonardo refuted. "I didn't have it; not anymore. You did."
Raphael shook his head back and forth. "In my head she was still your girlfriend, the woman you loved and I didn't care. I pinned her to the cot in Donny's lab and tore her clothes from her body, determined to take her then and there. The only thing that stopped me was seeing the restraints that had tied me to the cot only a few days before when I was completely out of my mind. I knew she loved you, she had told me she did, and I figured it would be easy for me to give her back. She deserved you, not me. I knew that whatever Catherine and I had done, it was okay. We had crossed the line but only by inches. I said the worst possible things I could think of to her, hoping it would be enough for her to give up on me and go back to you."
"She never would have come back to me, Raph," Leonardo informed him, his voice carefully devoid of any emotion.
"You don't know that," Raphael refuted.
Leonardo shook his head in exasperation. "Yes I do. She loved you, Raph. She was going to fight for you tooth and nail, and she did. If she had come back to me, she would have been settling for less."
Raphael remained silent after this observation, still not able to believe the lengths Catherine had gone to be with him.
"When Elizabeth told me that Catherine was in love with you," Leonardo began hesitantly, "I wondered how? Not that…" he paused for a moment, collecting his thoughts before he continued. "I'm not saying… I'm happy for you, I just…" his words trailed off awkwardly, as he struggled to express himself.
"You're wondering after everything I did to her, how she fell in love with me?" Raphael asked roughly, knowing he had wondered the same thing, and could not quite fault his brother for the question.
"I know I wasn't-"
"Yeah, you weren't perfect either," Raphael interrupted with a huff. "You only broke up with her like…three times and only got her almost killed once." He saw his brother physically flinch at his cutting words, but this gave Raphael no satisfaction. "Me, on the other hand, I was a total jackass to her the entire time, almost got her killed once and actually tried to kill her. "Twice."
Leonardo, his face grim, nodded. "I just don't understand how two kisses could have-"
Raphael looked away in shame at his brother's words and Leonardo stopped talking.
"How many times?" Leonardo ground out, his voice choked and laced with anger.
"Three," Raphael admitted. "But I swear I only kissed her once on purpose. The other two times were… The one you didn't know about was completely accidental. It wasn't even really a kiss. It was more… I was trying to get her out of my room before I… She was trying to help. She was concerned about me, knew I wasn't sleeping and she and Mikey were breaking into my room and… I was…going to do something I would regret…" his words trailed off. "I was shoving her out of my room and she turned her head, my face was too close, her lips brushed mine. It was barely a kiss," he defended and Leonardo closed his eyes, seeming to calm his anger and focus again.
"Three kisses," Leonardo amended.
Raphael winced, but took a breath to continue his initial thought. "None of them were Catherine's fault; I was the one who kissed her. She never betrayed you, Leo, it was all me."
Leonardo's tense shoulders loosened slightly as he crossed his own arms over his chest, Beowulf giving a light whimper of anxiousness at the sudden tension that was displayed between Raphael and Leonardo.
Uncrossing his arms, Leonardo tentatively gave Beowulf a measure of comfort by stroking his head.
Raphael realized that it was the first time he had seen Leonardo get close enough to Beowulf to do such a thing, almost as if he was…afraid or nervous.
Leonardo, seeing Raphael's watchful expression offered, "I wasn't sure, with him being a service animal, if I was allowed to pet him." Quirking his lips slightly he said, "And I wasn't sure if he would let me pet him, or bite my hand off if I attempted it."
Raphael chuckled. "I would say he's all bark and no bite…well except he can't bark, you get the idea, but I've seen him take after a bear. He can be pretty scary when he wants to be. But he's really a giant puppy and he loves the attention, especially from Catherine," Raphael murmured, admitting that the wolf-dog worshipped the very ground she walked on and Raphael couldn't quite understand why.
"It's probably because she feeds him," Leonardo suggested and Raphael shook his head. "I feed him. He just…likes her better I guess."
"She must be the fun one," Leonardo said with a smile.
"Must be," Raphael agreed with a smirk of his own before he turned serious again.
"I know that every time Catherine and I were together it seemed like we were…fighting or I was being an ass, but… There were times when we weren't and I wasn't."
Leonardo stopped stroking Beowulf's fur and listened intently.
"Catherine said that I stole tiny pieces of her heart during these moments. When I found out that the night I thought I was out with Elizabeth and it was actually Catherine, I admitted to myself that I had a good time with her." Raphael smiled at the remembrance before continuing. "And I think, even though my heart was already lost to her, that this confirmation only made me love her more," he said softly.
Leonardo's eye ridges rose in surprise at his words, but remained silent.
"It wasn't…they were innocent," Raphael rushed to assure his brother. "Like when I hijacked your date and she cooked me dinner, we talked about….mayonnaise on burgers and she tried to call a truce; or the first time I ever talked to her on the phone and we talked about what a 'woman's fine' was and she said I was nice for cooking you breakfast since you were hung-over and that I was like that artist guy I was named after. And when I had stolen Bastet and told her I was going to keep it, for some reason, she let me. Or when she told me that she was my friend and that she was worried about me and wanted to help me…" he paused as he remembered the rest of their conversation, carried out with Catherine sprawled out under him upon his bed, nothing but a pillow separating their bodies. He felt his cheeks flush in embarrassment. "Okay…that one might not have been so…innocent. But I didn't do anything but touch her cheek and yell at her…a lot," he admitted.
"But…it was during those moments when I forgot to be defensive and keep my distance. I was just myself and I forgot how fucked up I was because that's what she did to me. We were just in the moment and even though by the end of it I was sayin' nasty shit and rememberin' that I was supposed to be keepin' her as far away from me as possible, somewhere along the way, our arguing…it stopped being just fighting. I was still yelling at her, pushing her away, but it was like she knew what I was really saying; what I was really doing. She took a page outta Donny's book and stopped listenin' to what I was saying and just…judged me by what I did, because according to Donny, everythin' that comes out of my mouth is either lies or bullshit."
Leonardo was surprised into a laugh by this and grinned, his eyes crinkling with humour. "Donny said that?" he asked in surprise.
"Yeah, right after he said that I loved Catherine and to just tell her how I felt about her." Raphael shook his head. "I think the genius was so proud he had figured it out, he didn't stop to think about what he was saying."
"That sounds like Donny," Leonardo murmured as he shook his own head in bemusement, but Raphael caught the brief flicker if distress in Leonardo's eyes.
"Yeah," he agreed and waited tensely, sensing that Leonardo had a question.
"Of those moments," Leonardo began softly, "which was the one where I lost her?"
Surprised by the question he stammered, "It's not…I never asked her, but…" he thought about everything that had happened, and he realized that he knew. "When you told her you loved her, and that you loved her enough to let her go."
"I did break her heart," Leonardo stated as if he was somewhat surprised by this revelation.
Raphael bit his lip and gave a one shouldered shrug. "Yeah, I think you did, a little. But she told me that when you said you loved her, that she tried to give you her heart in return, only she couldn't, because it was no longer hers to give."
Leonardo froze before giving a small nod of acknowledgement. "She realized she was in love with you."
"Yeah," he acknowledged, not proud of this, but not regretful of it. "But she did love you," Raphael offered softly.
Leonardo smiled a sad kind of smile. "I know," he said. "My only regret is that I didn't allow her to help you sooner."
Raphael shrugged. "I don't know if she woulda been able to help me sooner. I don't think I woulda let her," he confessed. "Here," he motioned to the mountains, "I didn't have much of a choice."
Leonardo grinned. "I'm just glad that she was able to help you and that you two are both happy."
"And I'm glad you and Liz hooked up. She's been good for you. You're practically likeable now."
Leonardo snorted, but didn't deny the observation.
Becoming serious, Raphael turned towards his brother. "I want you to be my Best Man."
"W-what?" Leonardo said, obviously blindsided by both the admission and the sudden change in topic.
"I want you to stand beside me when I marry Catherine. I know it might be a little weird, but the truth is, without you, I never woulda met her, and without her, I probably wouldn't be standing here."
Leonardo's face became thoughtful, but there was a grim cast to his features as he acknowledged Raphael's words and the truth of them.
"I'd be honoured," Leonardo finally replied.
Raphael gave a curt nod. "Thanks, Leo," he replied softly. "I just wanted you to know, because I'm going to do you a favour."
"Uh…you are?" Leonardo asked, his voice filled with distrust as Raphael gave him a wide-toothed grin.
"Yup. I'm tellin' Mikey he can be my Best Man," Confusion and a spark of hurt lit his brother's eyes and Raphael explained, "If I let you stand up beside me, you'll never hear the end of it. I don't live with Mikey anymore. Once you guys pack up and leave, I ain't gonna hear nothin' from him. But you…. Day in and day out you're gonna havta listen to Mikey moanin' and complainin' that it wasn't fair that I picked you. So this is me doing you a favour. Think of it as my early wedding present to you," Raphael winked and was satisfied when Leonardo stammered out a quick 'we've only been going out for four months!' and his cheeks bloomed with colour.
"Yeah, well," Raphael offered smoothly, enjoying his brother's embarrassment, "I've seen you and Liz together and I ain't taking the bet that you guys won't get hitched, so when you do, just remember this."
Leonardo recovered and gave a rueful laugh. "Thanks."
"Don't say I never did nothin' nice for you," Raphael retorted and clapped his brother affectionately on the shoulder.
Leonardo turned so that he was able to pull Raphael into a hug, which Raphael returned. They didn't say anything just enjoyed the feel of the embrace and the unspoken words of forgiveness and acceptance that hung in the air between them.
Pulling away, Raphael picked up his beer and dumped the warm liquid out. "We should get back."
"Yeah," Leonardo agreed as they headed back the way they had come. "We have a wedding to get you to."
"Yeah, that's not-"
"Today?" Leonardo asked mischievously.
"Seriously?!" Raphael asked incredulously.
"Sabrina thought it would be better if you were distracted."
"Isn't it bad enough that she practically forced this whole wedding thing on us in the first place and now she's hijacked the whole thing?!"
Leonardo shrugged. "Are you really upset that you didn't have to listen to talk about flowers and dresses and decorations?" Leonardo asked archly.
Raphael opened his mouth before snapping it closed as he thought about it. "Nope," he replied truthfully.
Leonardo laughed and Raphael grinned broadly before putting his arm around his older brother's shoulder and they began to walk back. "Thanks, Leo." More seriously he added, "For everything."
Leonardo smiled at him and Raphael felt as if his heart was finally lighter; having rid itself of a good portion of heavy guilt.
Later that day, Raphael stood beside his bride, his finery borrowed from Leonardo while Catherine's pink flower print dress was borrowed from Sabrina. A bouquet of wild flowers was clutched in Catherine's hand as they listened to Casey as he officiated their wedding.
Elizabeth had walked Catherine down the aisle and acted as her Maid of Honour and Raphael had Michelangelo stand up as his Best Man, as promised; just to shut him up.
There were no rings but there were vows and Sabrina had caught the bouquet (no one was getting in her way, much to Michelangelo's embarrassment).
Pictures were taken by Sabrina who sighed over the beauty of the scenery and dinner was made up of barbequed hamburgers and a salad with cupcakes for dessert.
An outdoor speaker and the playlists from their guests' cell phones created the mood as they laughed and talked and danced into the evening.
Raphael reflected that if Catherine were any other kind of woman, she probably would have been disappointed with the simplicity of the wedding, but she seemed happy with everything and Raphael himself couldn't have asked for a better way to show to his family his devotion and love for the woman who was now his wife and his mate for life.