WARNING: language, slash, Twilight-bashing.
A/N: Somewhere hidden in the depths of this drabble (alright; I bolded it) is the 50,000th word I have written for this site! I never thought I'd make it this far! And I love you all so much! So, in celebration, have a Twilight-bashing Drarry! By the way, this was actually inspired by someone's profile. People actually do compare Draco and Mike Newton! –is appalled-
Fanfiction Has Gone Downhill Nowadays
Draco stared in horror at the computer screen. It was vile. It was disgusting. It was beyond words.
Harry walked into the room and halted. "Something wrong, love?" he asked worriedly.
Draco didn't turn around. "Tell me, Harry. Do you perceive any resemblance between myself and that Mike Newton character from the horrid Twilight books?"
Harry thought about it, and offered, "You're both blond?"
In a flash, Draco had him pinned to a wall with a wand jabbed into his neck. Draco's eyes were wild, and he snarled, "How dare you compare me with that insipid pubescent? He looks like a whale, is an imbecile, is American, and –worst of all– he likes women!"
Harry awkwardly patted Draco's back. "Have you been reading fanfiction again?"
Draco slumped. "It's so addicting! Why can't they ever compare me to one of the vampires? Why do I always have to be a goddamned Muggle?"
Harry breathed into his ear. "I'll have you know, I find you much sexier than Newton."
And really, Harry's was the only opinion that mattered.
FIN.