*in Florence*
Jamal: Have you heard the rumors of a hay monster going around?
Fred: Jamal, thats kid's stuff. Just go and poke the hay with a really long spear, and if you find the asshole who poisoned Jim, we can all go home. And watch whores fight each other. And push archers of really high buildings. CHECK IT.
Jamal: Why don't you check it?
Fred: The monster isn't real.
Jamal: If its not real, then check the fucking hay!
Fred: You do it! Your the one who's blac-
Jamal: ...What?
Fred: Nothing. *heh*
Jamal: Finish that thought. Racist asshole.
Fred: Jamal, come on. You know, I didn't mean it like that!
Jamal: BULLSHIT. I've been putting up with your shit for too long Fred. Unless you fucking take this pointy ass stick and poke the hay, I'mma tell THE POPE about your little fling with that fucking goat in Tuscany.
Fred: You wouldn't-
Jamal: Yeah, I FUCKING WOULD. CHECK THE GODDAMNED HAY, LAZY ASS.
Fred: NO!
Jamal: YES!
*voice from inside barrel of hay* FUCKING POKE ME ALREADY. I WANT TO GET HOME SO I CAN SNOG WITH- UH, WATCH WHORES BEAT UP EACH OTHER WITH LEONARDO.
Fred: OH WHATEVER.
*walks over to hay timidly.*
*whimpers*
Ohgodohgodohgod
*pokes*
....YEAH! I'M ALIVE! JAMAL, YOU PANSY-
Ezio in hayl: *Stabs Fred and drags him in*
NARGLESNARFNARGLE
Jamal: HOLY FUCKING SHIT OH MY GOD *runs away*
Ezio: TONIGHT. WE DINE.
ON...HUMAN
PREPARED MEALS. I'mma head back to the villa. Mario makes some mean spaghetti.