Summary: Most of Episode 1 cast stuck in a room; chaos ensues. Silly fic.
Category: Humor/Parody
Rating: R, I think.
Author: Pipper
Disclaimer: They aren't mine, but I wanna play with them, so NYUH!
WARNING: Kinda slashy and sexual, but NOT really. SOME explicit language, but hey, who's complaining? ;-)
[SCENE 1: Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan meditating in a corner; Queen Amidala trying to put on make-up; Anakin running around, arms outstretched, making weird airplane noises; Yoda pacing around, saying "hrmm," stick tapping on the floor and everything.]
Yoda: Hrmm…get out of here we must. *Taps walking stick on the floor* Stay here forever, we cannot.
Amidala: Can you not do that?! *Glare*
Yoda: Hrmm? *Looks at Amidala*
Amidala: Stop tapping your stupid little stick! I'm trying to put mascara on!
Yoda: *Evil grin* *Starts tapping stick really loudly and in a VERY annoying way*
Amidala: *GASP* Now see what you've done! *Points to black streak on the left side of her face* You. Little. Jedi. Bitch! *Pounces on Yoda*
Qui-Gon: Children, play nice.
Obi-Wan: *Licks lips*
[Yoda and Amidala stop fighting and turn to look at the Master and Padawan.]
Qui-Gon: *Opens eyes*
[Yoda and Amidala look at Qui-Gon and then down to his crotch; they see a hand there; their gazes follow the hand; they realize it's Obi-Wan's hand.]
Yoda: Touch your master's cock you may not!
Obi-Wan: Why not?!
Yoda: BECAUSE!
Obi-Wan: I'm sorry, Master Yoda, can you please say that backwards like you always do? *Grin*
Yoda: *Glare*
[Everyone starts laughing at Yoda.]
Yoda: *Starts turning red (or whatever color green and red put together makes), steam coming out of his ears and stuff.
[Anakin bumps into a dresser and doubles over. Everyone stops laughing and looks at him.]
Qui-Gon: Is everything all right Ani?
Anakin: *Raises an eyebrow* Does it look like I'm fine?! I just my balls on the dresser, damn it!
[Amidala runs to Anakin and crouches next to him.]
Amidala: Please tell me you didn't damage the merchandise! *Touches Anakin's balls and stuff* Thank goodness, I think we can still have twins. *Beam*
Anakin: YIPPIE!!!
--End SCENE 1-
~To be continued~