Caitlin's Secrets

by robertwnielsen

What happened after the episode Kingdom Come? Did Caitlin's short-lived relationship with Ken Sawyer have consequences? And what will those consequences do to her friendship with String?

Caitlin's Secrets

Disclaimer—Don't own anything, except the idea.

Summary—What happened after Kingdom Come? Did Caitlin's short-lived relationship with Ken Sawyer have consequences? And what will those consequences do to her friendship with String?

A/N #1—This is an original story, set around three months after the events of Kingdom Come, and focusing on a possible set of consequences. The character of Dr. Angela Robertson is mentioned in Chapter 10 of What Now?, and the character of Judge Ronald Clevenger is from my Class Reunion storyline, among others. Enjoy!-robertwnielsen

Oh—my—GOD! Caitlin O'Shannessy felt a rush of terror combined with nausea. She couldn't believe what she saw when she looked at the stick in her hand—but there it was—the confirmation of the consequences of a night she would just as soon forget. The small stick was making her nauseous—for more reasons than one, she thought, fighting a rush of panic, along with an urge to throw up. I can't believe this! Then, she calmed herself down for a moment and thought, Hang on just a minute. I thought I remembered reading somewhere that these things aren't 100% accurate, so there's a chance this test is wrong, or maybe—maybe I screwed it up, somehow. God, this test has to be wrong! It-it just has to be! Angrily, she walked out of the small bathroom at the hangar, shoving the offensive piece of plastic into the pocket of her jeans. Fortunately, Cait knew that Dom and String were off doing a shoot, so she quickly went into the office and made a phone call to Kensington General Hospital. A few moments later, she had dashed a note off and left it on Dom's desk, heading out the door to her car and leaving the hangar moments later.

As she drove, Caitlin found herself wrestling with the consequences of what she'd found. This—this can't be happening. I was only with him that one time, and I thought he—that is, I thought we—God in Heaven! She couldn't finish her thought, but if what she feared was true, she was afraid that neither Dom nor Hawke would want anything to do with her ever again. Fighting back a wave of tears, she continued driving towards the hospital. If that test was right, though, it does explain why I've been feeling so, off, these past few weeks, and why I've been snapping at Dom, and especially at String. I, I owe them both an apology, no matter what the doctor tells me. I-I just hope to heck that test was wrong, because if it's not, then I'll lose String, even as a friend, forever. Finally, she pulled into the hospital parking lot and, after turning off the car's engine, gathered her things to walk inside. As she sat in the waiting room, Caitlin said a silent prayer. Dear God, please let that test be wrong! Suddenly, the door opened, and a nurse called out, "Caitlin O'Shannessy?"

Well, here we go, Caitlin thought nervously as she stood up and followed the nurse.

"Dom? Where's Cait?" Stringfellow Hawke asked.

"Good question, String," Dominic Santini replied as they pulled up to the hangar after finishing the shoot. Normally, Caitlin O'Shannessy would be standing outside the hangar waiting for them, but today, she was gone, and Hawke was worried. Hawke quickly parked the Jeep, and he and Dom climbed out and walked into the hangar.

"Cait? Caitlin?" Dom called out but got no response. He and Hawke walked around the hangar but found no sign of Caitlin anywhere. Dom finally walked into the office, wondering if Caitlin had left any indication where she went, and he found the note on the desk. He quickly picked it up and walked out of the office.

"Dom, she's not here," String said, suddenly worried.

"I found this on the desk." Dom handed the paper to Hawke, who scanned it quickly before handing it back to Dom.

Guys,

Sorry to bug out like this, but something came up. I may not be back today, either. It depends on what I find out. I promise—I'll explain everything later.

Caitlin

"What on Earth do you suppose that's about, Dom?" Hawke asked, worried.

"I dunno, String," Dom replied. "Guess we just wait and find out what happens, huh?"

"I guess so. Not like there's anything else we can do, Dom," Hawke replied, suddenly worried about his friend. I sure hope nothing's happened to her. Hawke remembered the last time he'd expected to find her at the hangar, but she wasn't there. When Sawyer kidnapped her. I just hope this isn't anything like that. I sure as hell don't want to go through that again.

Meanwhile, at Kensington General Hospital...

"No!" Caitlin insisted. "This—this can't be!" The words Caitlin had just heard—Congratulations! You're having a baby! —hung in the air like a death sentence. Trust me, Doc, this is nothing to celebrate, Caitlin thought sadly. Now, if String was here with me, and it was his baby I was pregnant with, I'd be walking on air. Considering whose baby it is, though, I'm just disgusted, and I want to be sick, for more reasons than one.

"Caitlin," Dr. Angela Robertson said, "I'm sorry, but it's confirmed. That home pregnancy test you did at the hangar was accurate, and you followed the directions exactly as they were written when you took it. You're three months pregnant. I—I take it from your reaction that this wasn't a planned pregnancy?"

"No," Caitlin sighed as she remembered the night she'd spent with Ken Sawyer, just before he kidnapped her. "This wasn't even a planned relationship. Actually, it's not even a relationship—because the man I slept with—the baby's father—is dead." I should have said the jerk who conned his way into my bed and slept with me, Caitlin thought, but I don't want to talk about—or even think about—that bastard anymore. I mean, the only difference between what he did with me that night and rape was the fact that all that malarkey he'd been spouting at me had me so danged hypnotized that I said 'yes' when he told me he wanted to sleep with me, which makes me disgusted with myself.

"Dead?" Dr. Robertson repeated, aghast. "I'm not even going to ask, because something tells me I don't want to know."

"You're right, Doctor," Caitlin wiped angry tears out of her eyes, even as she considered who her baby's father was. "You don't want to know." I don't really want to explain it, either. I mean, if I was at Foxbridge, I wouldn't have a problem, but I'm afraid I wouldn't want to explain Airwolf, or Sawyer, to you, Doc. "I-I thought I remembered reading somewhere that home pregnancy tests like I did aren't always accurate, but, in this case, I was wrong."

"Unfortunately, whoever wrote whatever information you might have read was also wrong, Caitlin. When they're done right, and I told you that you followed the directions exactly as they were written, even home pregnancy tests are better than ninety percent accurate."

"Thanks, Doctor. I guess I was just hoping I'd be in that ten percent, or less, that was inaccurate," Caitlin replied sadly.

"Well," Dr. Robertson said, suddenly worried, "there are options, you know. I'd be happy to—" she stopped as Caitlin suddenly glared angrily at her.

"No!" Caitlin said, anticipating what the doctor was going to tell her. "I—I mean, I'm not sure what I want to do at this point."

"What about that guy you work with—the one I've seen in here a couple of times with you. Hawke, I think his name is?" Dr. Robertson asked, recalling seeing Stringfellow Hawke around the hospital a couple of times when he'd been there with Caitlin. "The times I've seen him in here with you, he seemed like he was worried about you, like he cared about you as someone more than just a friend. And, when he's been the one hurt, I know I've seen a look on your face that said you cared about Hawke more than as just a friend. Do you think that he—" Caitlin's jaw dropped in shock at what she thought Dr. Robertson might be insinuating.

"I-I dunno, Doctor. I mean, Hawke's a good friend and all that; and I know he cares about me, but he never talks about really settling down, especially with me. And I can't dump this on him." 'Cause if I did, as soon as I told him that Sawyer slept with me, and that he was the father of my baby, Hawke would turn tail and run back to that cabin of his faster than Airwolf—under full turbos—can accelerate to Mach 1. Dom told me about how that girl, Tess Dixon, ran away from Hawke after she told him she was pregnant with his baby, and that's exactly what I'm afraid Hawke will do to me—run away from me, that is. 'Course if Hawke did that, I'd just have to follow him to straighten him out. Heck, I'd follow Stringfellow Hawke to the ends of the Earth, if that's what it'd take to straighten his fool head out about me. Because there's nothing I'd like more than for String to help me raise my baby—as my husband. 'Cause I do care about String as more than just my best friend. I love Stringfellow Hawke like a woman loves the man she wants to spend the rest of her life with. And, I'd like nothing better than to spend however long I have left on this earth with String and to raise my baby with him beside me, as my husband. That'll never happen, though, especially once I tell him that I slept with that rat bastard Sawyer. Hawke'll never want anything to do with me when he hears about it. Because even though I said I know Hawke 'cares about me,' I don't know if he loves me, or is really in love with me. I mean, sure, I'd like to think he is, but I wonder if that's not just my ego running away with me, she thought sadly. If I'm being honest with myself, I think the chances of String marrying me, heck, of String even loving me, especially when he finds out I'm carrying Sawyer's baby, are slim and none. And I'm afraid slim has already walked out the door.

"I understand, Caitlin," Dr. Robertson replied, smiling sympathetically. "But you're going to need to confide in someone, at some time. Soon," she said, glancing down to Caitlin's belly. Caitlin followed Dr. Robertson's eyes down and saw a small baby bump already showing. Dr. Robertson laid a comforting hand on Caitlin's shoulder and smiled at her, then said, "You can't hide this for very long, because you're showing enough that people are going to start talking." She smiled at Caitlin reassuringly, and then walked out of the examination room to let Caitlin get dressed.

Pregnant? I—I don't believe it. But the evidence was there in front of her—Dr. Robertson had left the test results, along with a series of pamphlets on nutrition and other things that Caitlin would need to know as the pregnancy progressed—and, Caitlin could clearly see the baby bump when she looked in the mirror there in the examination room. Guess I can't argue with what I see right in front of me. Caitlin recalled how she'd dismissed the bump as just weight gain brought on by eating too much junk food. Well, now I know why I've been eating all that junk and feeling so out of sorts these past few weeks—months, actually. Dr. Robertson's right, though—I can't hide this from anybody. People are going to start talking as soon as they see that I'm pregnant. She quickly dressed, gathered up the papers and her other belongings, then checked out with the nurse at the front desk and got ready to head for home. She quickly went to her car, sitting inside and crying for several long minutes before she felt like she could drive home safely.

By the time she got back to her apartment, Caitlin was in tears again. Damn you, Sawyer! Damn me too, for being so stupid as to fall for him and his lies! He promised me we were safe, that he had protection, but he lied through his ass, just like everything else he ever told me, including when he said he loved me! Now I'm stuck carrying his baby! Why in the heck do I let things like this happen to me?

She knew what Dr. Robertson meant when she mentioned "options." One, Caitlin seriously thought about, but she knew that the other 'option' was out of the question. Even if I wasn't Roman Catholic, I—I could never do that. Besides, Mom would have a fit if I did, even more than she's going to have when she finds out that I got pregnant by a man who wasn't my husband. She remembered that day a few months ago, when she ran lines for her acting class with Dom—

"If he won't accept his responsibility, then he just doesn't exist for me anymore! And I don't care what you say! I'm going to have this baby, and I'm going to raise it alone!"

How little did I know. Caitlin felt a wave of sadness wash over her, as she got ready to go to sleep that night. Before she went to bed, she glanced at herself in the mirror, focusing again on the small baby bump that was already there. God in Heaven. Hawke and Dom—they can't see this. I'll—I'll just have to stay away from work for a while, until I can figure out what I'm going to do. I know I told Dom that day that I'd raise a baby alone if I had to, but those were the lines I was running. I mean, I dunno if I want to raise Sawyer's baby, for God's sake! If String does what I think he's going to do when I tell him, then I think I'm just going to give the baby up for adoption. At least-At least that way I'd know the baby would have a good life. As she fell asleep, though, Caitlin was not surprised to see Hawke's face at the forefront of her thoughts. The way it's been more often lately. But once he finds out about this, String'll probably never speak to me again, especially once I tell him who the baby's father was. Caitlin let the tears flow, unbidden, once again as she considered what her life would be like without the best friend she'd ever had, Stringfellow Hawke, as a part of it.

Three Days Later...

"Dom, I'm worried," Hawke said. "Cait hasn't been around, hasn't even called for three days!"

"I know, String, and that's not like our Cait. You think something happened to her?"

"I dunno, Dom," Hawke said, heading out to his motorcycle, "but if you don't mind—" He hesitated when he reached his motorcycle, and Dom smiled at him.

"Go. I'm worried about Cait, too, y'know. Toni and I'll hold the fort around here for ya." Toni Donatelli, Dom's new top assistant stunt pilot, was working on one of the helicopters, and didn't hear the conversation between String and Dom.

"Okay, Dom," Hawke said as he climbed onto his motorcycle and fired it up. "And thanks. I'll—I'll let you know what happens."

"You better," Dom said, smiling at String. "Now, go, for Pete's sake!" Dom said again. He watched String roar off in the direction of Cait's apartment, and his imagination got the better of him. Dom couldn't help but remember what had happened just a few months ago, when he and Caitlin were discussing rescuing Hawke from John Bradford Horn.

"We gotta get the Lady!" Caitlin insisted.

"Not 'we,' me! The instructions say 'me!'" Dom snapped. Hawke's instructions had been specific—Dom was to deliver Airwolf, alone, to Horn, and then Horn would release String.

"Dom, don't do that to me," Caitlin said, her voice near the breaking point. "I care about him too, y'know. Probably more than you know."

I never really did ask her about that, but there was something about the sound of her voice that day—something that said that she loved String. 'Loved' him, as in the way a woman loves a man she wants to marry, not just as a good friend, the way I already know she does—and the way I know String loves Cait. If he'd only pull his head out of his rear end and acknowledge how she feels about him—and how I think he feels about her. Sighing, Dom turned and walked back into the hangar, wondering what was going on that was keeping Caitlin away from the hangar. I sure hope it's nothing too serious. I just can't understand why she hasn't even called in three days. That's why I'm worried. Well, maybe String'll be able to figure out what's going on. I sure hope so. 'Cause if Cait doesn't come back, that'd just, kill String, even if that stubborn mule refuses to admit how he feels about her. Hell, everybody can see it—Michael, Marella, Ev, and especially me.

Toni came up at that moment. "Where'd String go, Dom?"

"To find out where Cait's been, and what in the heck's going on with her," Dom said. "I'm worried about her, y'know. If it were anybody but you, Cait, or String, I probably would've fired her already."

"I know, Dom," Toni smiled knowingly at her friend. "I've gotten the impression that you care a lot about Caitlin, and so does Hawke, in his own way. I know Cait cares about Hawke, too—she once told me so—but I felt like she did even before she told me about it. Don't worry, Dom. I'm sure everything's fine."

Dom stared in the direction Hawke had taken on his motorcycle. "I sure hope so, Toni. I sure hope so." He sighed as they went back to work. Well, add Toni's name to that list. Even she can see Cait cares about String—and vice-versa. I just wish to hell that he could see the obvious and accept it.

As Hawke pulled his motorcycle up to Caitlin's apartment building, he started wondering what he would say, and how he would broach the subject of where Caitlin had been for the past three days. I—I guess I'll just have to ask her direct. He took a few deep breaths to calm his racing nerves, and then walked towards Caitlin's apartment building. I should've brought flowers or something. Something I could hide behind. Unfortunately, though, it's too late now. Hawke took a deep breath to calm his nerves again, and then began tapping gently on Cait's apartment door.

Inside her apartment, Caitlin sat on the couch in the living room nursing a cup of herbal tea and wondering what in the hell she was going to do with the rest of her life, and how she was going to take care of her baby. God, I was so hoping that I did something wrong with that test, but the doctor confirmed it! Now what am I gonna do? I-I can't go back to Texas, that's for danged sure. Mom would have a fit if I told her I was pregnant and not married, not to mention that I don't even wanna think about trying to explain what I was doing with that bastard Sawyer to her, and especially why he's dead. And, there's another reason I don't want Mom, or Erin, to know about this—they'd both want to be on the first plane back here and beat the snot outta String for getting me pregnant and not marrying me, 'cause they'd think String was my baby's father. I mean, I know what they're like when they get mad. It's like the circuit between their ears and their brains shuts down, and they don't hear a danged thing anybody says to them. I guess-I guess I'll just have to do what I told String and Dom I'd do after they shot Robert down.

"I'm gonna get on a plane, and I'm just gonna keep on going till the money runs out! Then I'm gonna walk! I'm never going to stop long enough to get involved with anybody!" she had said. I wish to hell I'd done it, too—just gotten on a plane and gone until the money ran out, then walked. Then I never woulda met Sawyer, and I wouldn't be carrying his baby! Most important, I wouldn't be stuck in love with Stringfellow Hawke, and frustrated as all get out because he refuses to love me back! She was so deeply engrossed in her own thoughts that she didn't hear the gentle tapping on the front door at first.

String stood outside, gently knocking on the front door. When he didn't get a response, he knocked a little louder and said, "Cait? Are you in there? It's me! It's me, String!" Maybe she's not here. Maybe she just packed up and left, the way she said she was going to do after we shot down Villars' Corsair. I sure hope not, but I've gotta know one way or the other. Hawke made a decision as he continued knocking. If she doesn't answer soon, then Dom and I are going straight to the Lair to get the Lady and try to find Cait or talk to Michael and see if he knows where she went.

"Cait? Are you in there? It's me. It's me, String!" Caitlin finally heard the voice coming through the door. Oh, God, no! Caitlin panicked when she heard Hawke's voice outside her door. Maybe—maybe if I just stay very quiet, he'll think I'm not here, and he'll go away. Caitlin was fighting down the panic that was rising in her gut. She sat as still as she could, trying not to make a sound. Then she remembered—God in Heaven, no! I forgot—String has a spare key! Michael had insisted that everyone have keys to each other's homes, in case of an emergency, as often happened where FIRM missions were concerned. If he uses it—Caitlin stopped her thoughts as she heard a key turn in the lock on the front door. Aw, no! Well, he's coming, so I'd better be ready.

Just about the time String was ready to give up and leave, he remembered—Wait a second. I forgot about the spare key. I know we all agreed they're only for emergencies, but I think this qualifies. He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out his keys, quickly finding the spare one for Cait's apartment, and opened the front door. "Cait?" Hawke asked as he walked inside. "Are you okay?" At least she's here, thank goodness, Hawke thought. But why is she in her pajamas, for Pete's sake? It looks like she's been crying for days.

"String," Caitlin replied as she set her tea down and stood up, furiously wiping tears out of her eyes, "what the hell are you doing here?" She had thought about having String in her apartment many times recently, especially after the incident with Horn, and most recently after Sawyer kidnapped her, but seeing him standing there in front of her now, all Caitlin could think was how embarrassed she was about the situation. He—he has to notice. What is he going to think of me?

"Caitlin?" Hawke slowly walked towards her, his worry increasing. "Where have you been the last three days? I've been worried sick about you, and so has Dom." Caitlin was surprised when Hawke took his shades off, and she saw the worry there in his eyes.

You've been worried sick! Ha! That's a laugh, especially since I really have been sick. "I-I haven't been feeling very well, String." This is true, mostly. She smiled grimly as she recalled the severe bouts of morning sickness she'd been having. I don't think String or Dom would have wanted to see that, and I sure as heck don't want to have to explain it! Then, something Hawke said a moment ago rang in Caitlin's head. 'I've been worried sick about you, and so has Dom.'

Okay, I get why Dom's worried about me, but why in the heck would String be worried about me? It's not like there's anything between us, even though I wish like heck there was. Caitlin tried to hide the depressed feeling her thoughts had generated, and quickly pulled herself back into the present when Hawke spoke again.

"When Dom and I got back from the shoot the other day, we noticed you were gone, and Dom found your note. That was three days ago, and ever since then you haven't even called the hangar to let us know where you've been, or what's going on with you. Like I said, Cait, Dom and I are both worried about you. I mean, if it were anybody but you, me, or Toni, Dom probably would've fired you by now." Caitlin knew Hawke was right, which helped her calm down, a little. "Are you okay, Cait?" Hawke asked again, becoming even more concerned.

I-I have to be honest with him, no matter what. "No, String. I-I'm not okay. When I left the other day, I was headed to-to the hospital."

"The hospital?" Hawke was shocked. "Why? Is something wrong, Cait?"

Oh yeah. Something's wrong, String. I can't believe you haven't noticed. "Because, String," Caitlin said nervously, "I wanted to confirm something I found out that day. Something's wrong all right. I haven't been feeling too well, like I said, so I—" She stopped as Hawke glanced down, and she knew what he was looking at when she saw his jaw drop. Oh, no. He noticed. Well, now he knows, so I'd better get ready for whatever he's going to say.

Hawke felt himself struggling to hide his surprise at the bump he saw in Caitlin's figure. He knew Caitlin exercised regularly, and he'd seen her doing her kata more than once, so the bump he saw could only mean one thing. Hawke was afraid to ask about what he saw, but finally he blurted out, "Cait? Are you—?" Hawke couldn't bring himself to say the last word. My God, she can't be—pregnant! How in the hell did that happen? I mean, I know how it happened, but I didn't think Cait was that serious about anybody, that she'd sleep with them! Maybe she doesn't feel the way Dom thinks she does about me. I would sure like to be able to tell Dom that, for once in his life, he's wrong!

"Yeah, String," Caitlin felt her cheeks turning red with embarrassment. "Yeah, I'm three months pregnant. While you guys were out doing that shoot the other day, I did one of those home pregnancy tests because I haven't been feeling so hot, not to mention the fact that I'm, late, if you know what I mean, and the test came back positive, so I went to the hospital to have it confirmed. I mean, I thought I'd read somewhere that those things aren't a hundred percent accurate, plus, I guess I was hoping that I'd done something wrong and screwed up the test. But the doctor confirmed that the home test was right." Caitlin wondered if her embarrassment showed as clearly as she thought it did on her face.

Three months. Hawke frowned as he did some quick mental arithmetic, especially when he reached what he thought was the answer. If she's that far along, then she must have gotten pregnant not long after she met...wait a minute. Aw, Cait. Please tell me that what I'm thinking isn't true.He didn't want to ask the question that had suddenly lodged itself in his mind, but he knew he had to. "Sawyer?" Hawke asked, afraid he already knew the answer. Why in the hell would she sleep with a rat like Sawyer? I mean, I know they were dating and all that, but I didn't think she'd sleep with him!

"Yeah." Caitlin felt even more embarrassed. "I—I'm sorry, String. Don't you remember what a smooth talker he was? Well, he talked me into bringing him back here after our date, and then we slept together before he kidnapped me. He even brought me to the hangar the next morning, so I could have things opened when you and Dom got there, before I took him on that flying lesson. I—I thought he'd been safe, that we'd been safe, but I—I guess I was wrong." Caitlin glanced sadly down at her belly, wondering what Hawke was thinking at that moment.

"Caitlin, I—" Hawke shook his head, shocked and embarrassed because of what he'd just heard. "I'm sorry, Caitlin. I-I just can't deal with this right now." He turned and fled from the apartment, closing the door behind him.

"String! Come back!" The anguish and panic in Caitlin's voice echoed in her ears as the door slammed behind String. God, he probably hates me now! Caitlin felt more despair than she could ever recall feeling as she ran into her bedroom and threw herself down on her bed. I don't blame him, either. 'Cause I'm not too fond of myself right now, either. Will I ever see String again? That look in his eyes—I haven't seen that in a long time. I-I've gotta do something! But, what?

Caitlin sighed as she glanced at a framed photo of Hawke that he had given her for her birthday. God, String. I'm sorry. I'm so, so very sorry. I wish to hell this had never happened, but it did, and I can't do a damned thing about it. Caitlin lay on her bed crying as she considered what she had done, and what effect it would have on her friendship with String.

What hurts most about all this is that I don't have anybody to talk to about it, except maybe Dom. 'Cause I know my mom wouldn't understand and would give me all kinds of grief for what I did, as well she should. I can't bother Erin with this, either. Not to mention, I don't want to have to explain Airwolf to either Erin, or Mom. Because I know if I did tell Erin, even if I swore her to secrecy, she'd go blabbing her big mouth to Mom about the fact that I'm pregnant. And if I know my sister, even without mentioning word one about Airwolf, if I said anything to her or Mom about the fact that I'm pregnant, they'd both blame String and come out here ready to tear him limb from limb, when String has nothing to do with it. This is my mess, and I-I'll just have to figure this one out on my own. Just like the day she found out she was pregnant, Caitlin remembered a conversation she'd had with Dom a few days ago, when Dom told her about Tess Dixon, and how she'd been pregnant with Hawke's baby, but didn't want it. Dom told me how Tess ran away from String, and how she didn't want his baby, and that's why I'm afraid he'll run away from me, now that he knows about my baby, and especially since he knows Sawyer was the father, she thought sadly. I knew he'd run, she thought as she remembered how Hawke had turned and run out of the apartment. I'm afraid he's just gonna run right outta my life if I don't do something to stop him. She cried for hours, until she finally fell into a dreamless, fitful sleep.

To say that Hawke's feelings and thoughts were in turmoil as he drove away from Caitlin's apartment building would have been the understatement of the year. Actually, more like the understatement of the decade, at least. He pulled off the road, so he could clear his head. I can't believe this. Hawke considered what he'd learned as he sat there along the side of the road. At least it explains where Cait's been the last three days, though. She probably didn't want to face us after she found out. Especially me. I mean, she probably thinks that just the fact that she and Sawyer slept together was bad enough, but now, the fact that she's pregnant by Sawyer, she probably thinks I hate her, which couldn't be further from the truth. Hawke knew that Caitlin had feelings for him that were more than just friendship. Dom told me what she said to him in Archangel's limo, before they went to rescue me. I'd be lying if I said I didn't have similar feelings about Cait. But we can't be together like that! Not with, the curse. Not to mention the fact that, like I thought before, I couldn't see somebody like her settling down with, not to mention settling for, somebody like me.

Then he remembered everything that Caitlin had been through since she'd come to California looking for him. Villars, Holly, the hijacking, that rival air service, not to mention the time on that island. Hawke remembered how he and Caitlin contracted a potentially fatal disease while investigating the disappearance of a group of scientists from a small island where experiments in biological warfare had been taking place. Even though he and Caitlin were both infected, Caitlin had faced the possibility that she could die as bravely as anybody Hawke had ever seen and had helped him find the live rabbit that carried the cure. She helped me keep it together long enough to shoot down those nukes that Russian sub pitched at us, after that sub commander went insane and ordered a missile strike to obliterate the island. I doubt I would've been able to stop those missiles, being under that sedative the way I was, if Cait hadn't kept me going. Not to mention what happened back in Texas, before either one of us knew the other one existed. And the way she fought me when Horn had me brainwashed—I still remember the bruise her combat boot left on my chest. She did tell that guy on the plane that she knows karate, after all, and gives free samples. I felt one of those free samples that day at Horn's compound. Maybe I've been thinking too much about that curse, because it's obvious Cait is perfectly capable of taking care of herself, and for those times when she does get in over her head and get into serious trouble, she has Dom, the Lady, and most importantly, me as backup. Slowly, he felt his emotions turn from shock at finding out Caitlin was pregnant to anger at Sawyer for what he had done to his good friend.

Dammit! Now I really wish I hadn't blasted Sawyer out of the sky like that! I would have preferred to beat the hell out of him with my bare hands for what he did, and, if she'd been with us, I'd want to give Cait a few shots at him, too! Or I would've just trussed him up like the pig he was, flown him back to the ship, and let Caitlin take care of him herself! Because I'd be willing to bet that Cait didn't sleep with him completely willingly. I'm not saying he raped her, but I'll bet he talked her into it somehow, because I do remember what a smooth talker that bastard was. Maybe he told her if she didn't let him sleep with her willingly, that he'd just do it anyway, and he'd hurt her, or Dom, or me, if she tried to charge him with rape or anything like that. Or, he might have threatened to hurt Dom, or me, if Caitlin tried to warn us what Sawyer was gonna do. Goddammit, now I wish I had forced that sonofabitch to land so that Dom and I could have beaten him to within an inch of his miserable life!

After spending several minutes thinking about everything he'd learned, Hawke had made up his mind about what he would do. Well. There's no way in hell I'm going to let Caitlin go through this alone. I remember how hurt I was when Tess ran away from me after she told me about being pregnant with my baby, and even though Caitlin got pregnant by Sawyer, I care about her—hell, I love her—too much to hurt her like that. So, if she'll have me, then I'm going to stand by her and help her raise this baby. And maybe, just maybe, we'll be together despite this. Because I think it's time I acknowledged something that everybody around here, including Michael and Marella, and especially Dom, already thinks that they know. How I feel about Caitlin. The fact that, I love her, and I'm in love with her. I-I think it's been that way for a very long time, too. Maybe ever since I saw her on the outside of that jail cell back in Pope County.

Then, Hawke thought about the way he'd left her apartment a few minutes ago. She probably thinks I hate her because of what she did, and the way I left her apartment. Well, whenever she comes back to work, I'll have to tell her I'm not upset with her and apologize for running out on her that way.

Finally, Hawke felt like his mind and emotions had settled enough that he'd be able to get back to the hangar without causing an accident, so he started his motorcycle back up and headed back to the hangar, and Dom.

By the time Hawke had arrived back at the hangar, some thoughts had begun forming in his mind. First off, I've gotta tell Dom what I heard, but then, before I do anything else, I've got to talk to Michael. I want—no—I need to know, legally, if there's anything I can do in a situation like this.

"It's about time you came back, kid," Dom said. "Did you see Cait? How's she doing?" The worry in Dom's voice wasn't lost on Hawke.

"She's okay, Dom. Or as okay as she can be, since she's three months pregnant."

"What?" Dom felt all the color drain from his face at Hawke's proclamation. "Pregnant? Are you sure?"

"Dom, I saw it with my own eyes. There's a definite baby bump there, no question about it. Caitlin confirmed it to me—she's three months pregnant. That's where she went the other day. She told me that she went to the hospital to confirm a home pregnancy test she did here while we were gone. And, I'm guessing that's why she never came back—she didn't want to face either one of us, especially me. She told me she was hoping the doctor would tell her that the test she did here was wrong, but it wasn't."

"Oh, mio Dio," Dom said, shaking his head. Fortunately, I recognize the Italian for 'Oh, my God.' That just about sums up my feelings exactly, Hawke thought.

"No wonder she's been staying away from here. But that explains the stuff I found in the bathroom trash basket while you were gone." String nodded, then Dom had a frightening, and yet, exciting thought cross his mind. "String? You're not—are you?" Hawke thought there was a tinge of hope in Dom's voice, but he couldn't be positive. Why would Dom think I'm the father of Cait's baby? Hawke wondered. It's not as if we've ever slept together, for crying out loud!

"No, Dom," Hawke replied. "Ken Sawyer is—was, that is." Why would you think I'm the father, Dom? You know Cait and I haven't slept together, for Pete's sake! Hawke stifled a chuckle at Dom's question.

"You're pulling an old man's leg, aren't you, String? Sawyer fathered Caitlin's baby? I don't believe it!"

"Hate to say it, Dom, but it's the truth," Hawke said, and Dom was surprised to note the tone of Hawke's voice. He sounds—sad. Ah, who am I kidding? That's gotta be my imagination running away with me again. Then, he heard Hawke speaking again. "Caitlin told me herself, and you and I both know Caitlin wouldn't lie to either one of us."

"When?" Hawke couldn't tell from Dom's voice whether he was shocked, or angry.

"Cait said they probably conceived the baby the night before Sawyer kidnapped her. You remember how they went out to dinner, and then we didn't see her the next morning—she was giving Sawyer that flying lesson when we got here, and the next thing we knew, we were tracking her chopper's emergency beacon in Airwolf. The way it looks, they slept together after he took her out on that date, and Sawyer brought her to the hangar, so she could have everything opened before they went on that flying lesson, so we wouldn't get suspicious." It worked, too. We didn't suspect a damned thing, at least not until Sawyer called me and started teasing me about losing something.

"Yeah, I remember, String," Dom said, shaking his head. "But, you're right. I do know Caitlin would never lie to us. I-I just can't believe it. Caitlin, pregnant with that bastard's kid."

"Me neither, Dom."

"Well, c'mon, kid," Dom said, moving towards the helicopter. "Let's get you home. I imagine you've got a lot of thinking to do."

"You can say that again." Then, Hawke realized what he'd just said, and added, "But you don't need to." Hawke's face was grim as they climbed into the helicopter, so Hawke could go home. When String turned his head away from Dom, looking out the co-pilot's side window, Dom knew that his younger foster son was deep in thought over what he'd learned that day. I'm not going to bother him. I know String well enough to know that he wants his solitude right about now. His mind's probably going in a million different directions. At least.

I sure hope to hell that you make the right decision, kid. Dom imagined his thoughts were only slightly less confused as Hawke's, as he flew toward the cabin. I mean, I know as well as anybody how hard it'd be to raise another man's kid, considering I did it with you and Saint John, but I think Cait would rather raise this baby with you—together, I mean—than she would raise it alone. He smiled to himself as he remembered how Caitlin had run lines for her acting class with him. Not that she couldn't if she had to. Dom smiled as he remembered how convinced he'd been that Caitlin was pregnant that day. But, I guarantee it'd sure as hell be easier on her if you were there with her, String.

"What in the heck are you smiling about, Dom?" Hawke asked, surprising Dom.

"Just remembering that time when Cait ran lines for her acting class with me, just before she found 'Alexandra the Goat.' She said, "If he won't accept his responsibility, then he just doesn't exist for me anymore! And I don't care what you say! I'm going to have this baby, and I'm going to raise it alone!" Then, she burst into tears, at least, I thought she had, and stormed out of the office, slamming the door behind her. I've gotta tell you, kid—Caitlin had me convinced she really was pregnant that time! Of course, when she opened the door again, she was scared, but I applauded her performance. But, how little did we know." Dom sighed at the situation. I sure hope String figures out what he's going to do, and darned soon, Dom thought, because I don't want to lose Caitlin. String is so much easier to get along with since she came to us—I don't know what I'd do if she left. Well, I do know one thing I'd do, Dom decided. I'd drag String's sorry butt to the Lair, get Airwolf, and fly to Texas so String and Caitlin could figure their feelings out, once and for all! I-I just hope I don't have to do that.

"Yeah," Hawke replied, looking at Dom and then turning his head to look out the co-pilot's window. "How little did we know."

By the time Dom had landed the helicopter on String's dock, he was wondering what was going on in his younger surrogate son's head. Trouble is that he's not talking. He anxiously watched String walk back towards the cabin, and that worries me. He watched String for a few more moments, then throttled the helicopter back up and headed towards Van Nuys.

As Hawke got ready for bed that night, he thought about everything he'd discovered that day, and he wasn't surprised to find his thoughts drawn increasingly back to Caitlin. The way they've been more, lately. It seems like I can't go for more than a few hours without thinking about Caitlin, especially when she's not around, like she hasn't been lately because of the baby. I guess it's time. Time to admit how I feel. I-I just wonder if she feels the same way about me.

Almost as if in answer, a voice rang in his head. There's only one way to find out, String.

Yeah, Hawke told the voice in his head, you're right. Hawke closed his eyes and quickly fell asleep. He wasn't surprised to find Caitlin's face at the forefront of his thoughts that night, either. I did know what she was talking about when she said she was 'late.' She meant that her period was late, which explains something else, too. Why she's been so emotional lately. I mean, she's bitten both Dom's and my head off, more than once, recently. I-I just didn't understand why she did it, until now. Well. The first thing I need to do is talk to Michael, but then I need to talk to Cait again. There's an awful lot that I want to say to her.

The next morning when he woke up, Hawke had one thing on his mind. He walked quickly and with purpose over to the briefcase Archangel had given him which contained the satellite phone. Almost without thinking, he dialed the number to Michael's office.

"Hello?" Michael's voice came through the handset, startling String. Good grief, doesn't he ever go home? I'm sure glad he's there now, though.

"Michael, it's Hawke. Sorry to bother you like this, but I-I need some information, and I need it fast."

"What sort of information, Hawke?" Michael asked.

"It's about a baby, Michael," Hawke said, almost embarrassed. "Someone I know is pregnant, but there's no father. He's, um, dead," Hawke added, then continued, "So my question is—does the mother gain full custodial rights? And if she were seeing someone and they got married, could that man sign the birth certificate, and say that he was the baby's father?" I wonder if I said too much.

"This, ah, someone," Michael said hesitantly. "Would she happen to be a friend of yours?" I don't know why, but I suddenly have a very bad feeling I know the answer to that one, even though something tells me I don't want to know. Michael suddenly felt himself becoming anxious.

"Yeah, Michael," Hawke said, even as he wondered if Michael had figured out what was going on, and that Hawke was talking about Caitlin. "She is a friend of mine." Maybe a lot more than a friend, if she'd have me, Hawke thought. But I have a bad feeling Michael knows I'm talking about Cait—or at least, he suspects it.

I was afraid of that. I've got a very bad feeling in my gut that I know who that friend is, too. Archangel sighed, trying to keep the sound quiet so that Hawke would not hear him. Especially with that damnable super-hearing of his, he thought. Aloud, he said, "Well, Hawke, let me talk with an old friend of mine, who's a lot more knowledgeable about legal matters than I am, and I'll get back to you. Are you going to be at the hangar later?"

"Of course, Michael," Hawke replied. I'll be damned! Archangel admitted that he doesn't know everything! Maybe not in so many words, but that's what he meant. Dom will love to hear that. Hawke couldn't keep himself from smiling despite the situation. Dom never can resist getting a dig at Michael, after all.

"All right," Michael said. "I'll contact you there." As Michael hung up the phone, he reached over and pressed the button on his intercom. "Marella? Get me Judge Ronald Clevenger, will you please?"

"Right away, Michael," Marella's voice came back to him. Michael leaned back in his chair as he considered what Hawke had told him. I certainly hope Caitlin's not the 'friend' you're talking about, Hawke. I have a very bad feeling that she is, though, if what I'm afraid happened with Sawyer really did happen. Just then, Michael's intercom buzzed. "Yes?" he asked.

"Ron's on line 3 for you," Marella said.

"Thank you, Marella," Michael said as he picked up his desk line and pushed the correct button. "Ron, how the heck are you?" Michael asked. "No, I'm afraid this isn't a social call. This is business. I—I need some information for a friend, Ron, and I need it fast." Michael listened to Ron for a moment, sighed, and said, "Yes, Ron. I'm calling on behalf of Stringfellow Hawke. This concerns a female friend of his; and before you ask, I don't know why, but I have a very bad feeling in my gut that Caitlin O'Shannessy is that friend. If my gut feeling is right, it seems Caitlin is pregnant." Michael began describing the situation, knowing that Ron Clevenger had been part of the FIRM's legal team, and as such, knew about Airwolf. Not to mention, we never canceled his security clearance, since we still deal with him from time to time, when Hawke or another agent runs into trouble with the law. Since Michael's office phone lines were secure, he knew he could talk freely about the incident where Sawyer had abducted Caitlin to try to get to Hawke and Airwolf. Ron listened as Michael explained what he surmised had happened between Caitlin and Sawyer, and that he feared that Sawyer was the father of the child Caitlin was carrying, but that thanks to Hawke, Sawyer was dead.

Ron finally told Michael that, as far as he knew, if Caitlin was seeing someone and married them before the baby was born, then she would be able to put that man's name on her baby's birth certificate as the baby's father, especially since Sawyer didn't have any family around that anyone knew about who could possibly sue for custody of the baby. Michael listened for a few minutes and finally said, "Okay, Ron, thanks. I'll let Hawke know. I owe you big time for this. Good-bye, Ron." You won't let me forget that I said that, I'm sure. Michael hung up the phone and leaned back in his chair, wondering exactly what Hawke had in mind.

Because I remember when we were all having lunch at that café in West Germany after you rescued me from Kruger. Every time I mentioned your name, Hawke, I swear that Caitlin's eyes lit up. I think you were the only one who didn't notice it, other than Cait, of course. In addition, Marella told me pretty much the same thing, the day she took Caitlin to that boutique to get her measurements for an Airwolf flight suit. Which, it turned out, was a damned good thing we had. Well. If Caitlin is the friend you were talking about, then I sure hope like hell that you do the right thing for once since I've known you, Stringfellow Hawke. Michael began cleaning up the papers strewn about his desk and got back to work. However, something was nagging in Michael's mind. Hawke said the father is dead. But if Cait's the woman with the baby, and I'm wrong and it's not Sawyer's baby, then who the hell is—was, that is—the father? I suppose I'll find out when I talk to Hawke. I suppose there's no time like the present. He quickly buzzed Marella again and told her to get ready to head out to the hangar. The sooner I get all the details, the better. In addition, I don't want to call over there and chance Dom, or, God forbid, Caitlin answering the phone. Besides, I think Hawke would prefer hearing this from me face to face. And I'm certainly relieved to hear Sawyer didn't have any family around here. If I'm right, and he slept with Caitlin when he had her as his prisoner, and she's pregnant with his baby the way I think she is, the last thing she and Hawke need right now is a custody fight, on top of everything else.

A sudden thought crossed Michael's mind. I remember when Hawke took that phone call from Sawyer in my limo, how angry Hawke seemed. Of course, I know that Hawke was concerned that Caitlin was missing, but I wonder if there was something more. Was Hawke worried about Caitlin for more reasons than just being concerned about a friend, and fellow Airwolf crewmember? Michael thoughtfully rubbed his chin as he considered the question that had just crossed his mind. Was Hawke worried because he had feelings for Caitlin? More than just friendship? I suppose I'll find out more when I talk with him, Michael thought. A few minutes later, Marella buzzed Michael again, and told him the limo was out front, waiting. Well, here we go, he thought as he stood up and walked out of his office, joining Marella and heading to the limousine. Ready or not, Stringfellow Hawke, here we come, Michael thought as he and Marella climbed into the limousine and headed for Santini Air.

"Would it be wrong for me to ask what's going on?" Marella wanted to know. "We don't have a mission for Hawke and Dom, so why are we going out there?"

"This concerns something that I'm afraid happened before Sawyer kidnapped Cait," Michael said, "and, I have to ask you to keep this in strict confidence between the two of us. I'm worried enough about what Hawke will say when I tell him that you know what's going on, but I'll deal with him. From what I understand, and I admit I don't have all the details, it appears that Sawyer slept with Caitlin before he had her kidnapped, and if I'm right, she's now pregnant with his baby."

"Oh, my God," Marella said. "Don't worry, Michael, the fact that I know what's going on won't go beyond this limousine. I wonder what Hawke's going to do."

"That's part of what I want to find out," Michael said, "and, thank you."

"Anytime, Michael," Marella said, directing a dazzling, mind-blowing smile to him. "But why do you have to go out there personally? Why not just call Hawke at the hangar?"

"I don't want to risk Dom, or even worse, Caitlin, answering the phone and asking a bunch of questions about why I'm calling for Hawke, Marella, especially since I don't think I've got all the answers. I mean, I think Caitlin was the woman Hawke was talking about when he called earlier, and that Sawyer was the one who got her pregnant, but I'm not sure, and you know what they say about assuming things."

"I understand, Michael."

Meanwhile...

"String, what the hell are you going to do?" Dom asked as he flew them back to the hangar. "Or have you decided yet?"

"Well, Dom, before you came to get me, I-I called Michael. I wanted to know if he knew anything about what happens if the father of an unborn child is dead—whether the mother can declare someone to be the father, or just how that works."

"You think he suspects Cait's the woman with the baby?" Dom demanded.

"It wouldn't surprise me, Dom. When I asked him, Michael did ask me if the woman I was talking about was a 'friend of mine,' so I have a bad feeling he suspects something. But, he admitted that he needed to check with a friend of his, who knows more about legal matters than he does."

"Well, I'll be damned!" Dom shouted, but the laughter was obvious in his voice. "Michael actually admitted he doesn't know everything!" Hawke smiled and nodded at his friend. Somehow, I figured you'd say that, Dom.

"So, have you made any decisions about what you're going to do, kid?"

"I—I think so, Dom. No, that's wrong. I don't think I've decided what I'm gonna do, I know what I'm going to do, and I've made my decisions about it.I mean, you told me what Cait said to you in Michael's limo that day when you were talking about rescuing me from Horn—well, I think it's time to find out just how much she cares about me. Because I'm finally ready to admit something—something that I've been fighting for a long time."

"What would that be, String?" Dom tried to keep the excitement out of his voice—and knew he was failing miserably.

"I'm finally ready to admit—that I love Cait, Dom," Hawke admitted. "And not just the way that good friends love each other, either. Don't get me wrong, I do love her that way, but I've realized something recently. Or maybe—maybe I just decided to admit it to myself, I dunno. I realized that—I'm in love with Cait. I have been in love with her for a long time. I've just been too stupid, or stubborn, to realize it. I just wonder if she feels that same way about me." On the other hand, maybe I've been being both stubborn and stupid.

"Somehow, String, I don't think you're going to have to worry about that!" Dom exulted. String glanced over at his surrogate father and was not surprised to see him grinning from ear to ear. "I mean, c'mon, kid, do you really think she would've said what she did in Michael's limo that day if she didn't feel that way about you?"

"Dom," String cautioned, "let's not get too hasty, here. I mean, we know how we think Cait feels, especially after what you told me she said that day, but remember what you always told Sinj and me?"

"Yeah, yeah, I remember." Never assume anything. 'Cause it just makes an 'ass' out of 'you' and 'me,' I used to tell the boys. It's like I said, though, String. I don't think you have any reason to be worrying. I think Cait's been waiting for you to straighten your danged fool head out about her for a long time! She wouldn't have told me what she did that day in Michael's limo if she didn't have feelings for you other than friendship, for crying out loud! "Y'know, String, I remembered something else about that night—the night Sawyer took Caitlin out. I remembered the look on your face when they left. If looks could've killed, both Sawyer and Caitlin would never have made it out of the hangar! You were jealous, weren't ya?"

"You're darned right I was, Dom. I mean, even though I knew I didn't have a right to be, since Cait didn't know how I felt, I was still jealous."

"I figured as much," Dom laughed, but the worry on his face was still obvious. Even so, I'd bet the payment I got for that last stunt that we did that Cait's going to think String's only saying this because of the baby—but I know String better than that! At least, I think I do. I mean, I thought Alan, Jane, and I taught him better than that. I suppose I'll just have to wait and see, though. Besides, I'll bet there's another reason Cait hasn't been at the hangar lately—morning sickness. I remember my ex-wife had terrible bouts when she was carrying Sally Anne, and Jane had it with both Saint John and String. I'll have to tell Cait I understand why she's been acting that way, whenever I see her again.

"Dom, what on earth made you think I'm the father of Cait's baby? You know we've never slept together, for God's sake!"

"I dunno, String. I don't even know why I said that, to be honest with you. Just a little harmless wishing, I guess," Dom replied as they approached the hangar.

"I was just curious," Hawke said, smiling at Dom as they landed. Just be patient, Dom. Maybe, someday, your wish will come true, Hawke thought. Because if Cait and I end up together, like I hope we do, then I'm sure she won't want her baby to be an only child. Neither would I, to be honest, but that's getting more than a little ahead of myself. First things first—tell Caitlin how I feel about her, and hope like heck that Dom's right, and she feels the same way about me.

When they got to the hangar, String and Dom were surprised and relieved to find Caitlin there and everything open for business. Dom quickly shut down the helicopter, and he and String walked out and met Caitlin.

"You okay, sweetheart?" Dom asked, concerned.

"As okay as—wait just a second! How in the heck did you know, Dom?" Caitlin demanded. Duh, Caity girl. All he's gotta do is look at you and he knows what's going on, just like String the other day at the apartment. Geez, that was dumb.

"Caitlin, I'm sorry," String said, embarrassed. "It's just that Dom asked me about where you've been, and what's going on with you, when I got back to the hangar last night—and I certainly hope you weren't expecting me to lie to him about it!"

"Nah, String, I wasn't expecting you to lie to Dom about this," Caitlin said as they walked back into the hangar together. "And besides, Dom woulda seen it this morning if you hadn't told him. I'm—I'm just embarrassed about everything." I should've expected Hawke to tell Dom what was up with me, she thought.

"I know, sweetheart," Dom said, smiling at her. "But, everything's going to work out. You'll see." He smiled at Cait and was relieved when she smiled back at him, albeit weakly.

"Thanks, Dom. I just hope you're right And, I'm—I owe you an apology for the way I've been acting lately, biting your head off like that. Not to mention the fact that I didn't even call you for the past three days. Anyway, I-I'm sorry." Caitlin hoped her embarrassment wasn't showing too much on her face.

"That's okay, sweetheart," Dom said, smiling at her. "My ex-wife was the same way when she was carrying Sally Ann, and Jane was the same way with both String and Saint John. Oh, the things she said to Alan and me when she was pregnant with them! Heck, I thought Saint John was gonna be an only child, the way Jane carried on when she was pregnant with him! Not to mention what she said—or, what she yelled, and swore—at both Alan, and me, the day Saint John was born. I mean, sailors don't swear like that! And, with what she swore at us both when String was born, let's just say I'm not surprised String never got any younger brothers or sisters." Dom smiled at the memory of Hawke's parents, even under the circumstances. "Don't worry about it, Cait. It'll pass. I figured you were having trouble with morning sickness, after String told me about the baby. I remember Jane and my ex-wife both had problems with morning sickness, so don't worry about it. I also figured you were embarrassed about the fact that you're pregnant, especially with who the daddy was, and didn't want to see me, or String. Like I said, it's okay."

"Thanks again, Dom." Caitlin smiled as they went back to work.

Later that morning, Hawke was standing outside the hangar when Michael's limousine pulled up. Well, I certainly wasn't expecting this. He could have just called me from Knightsbridge. Quietly, Hawke moved out to meet the limousine, and greeted Archangel as he stepped out.

"Michael, you could have just called me. You didn't have to come all the way out here. So, what did you find out?"

"Hawke, I hope you don't mind that I came over here unannounced. I decided not to call you because I didn't want to chance that Dom, or especially Caitlin, might answer the phone." Hawke nodded his understanding, grateful that Michael had given the matter that much consideration. Of course, Dom already knows, but Cait doesn't know what we've talked about, and I want to keep it that way for as long as I possibly can. And, if Michael had called and Dom answered the phone, I'd just have to hope that he closed the office door, so Caitlin couldn't hear the conversation.

"I appreciate the consideration, Michael. What have you found out?" That makes sense, and like I said, I appreciate that Michael didn't want to take the chance that Cait might answer the phone. When Michael started talking again, Hawke pulled himself back into the conversation.

"I've talked to an old friend of mine, Judge Ronald Clevenger. I think you and Caitlin went to his retirement ceremony from the FIRM's legal team not long ago, and as I recall, Marella commented about how in love with you Caitlin looked when you walked in. Anyway, Ron told me that in a case like this, since the father is dead and has no family around that we know about—and the child hasn't been born, that the mother gains full custodial rights—and would be able to designate someone as the father." Just then, Michael saw Caitlin out of the corner of his good eye. Damn. I really hate being right all the time, Michael thought, even as he noticed that Caitlin was walking away from them, and probably hadn't seen him talking to Hawke. Dropping his voice to a level only Hawke could hear, Michael said, "Hawke, I have a confession to make. I-I suspected Caitlin was the 'someone' you were talking to me about this morning, and I see I was right. I have to tell you, I wish like hell I was wrong."

Glancing subtly over Michael's shoulder, Hawke replied, "Yeah, Michael. You were right. That's why I said I needed this information fast. Caitlin's three months pregnant. And Sawyer was the father." I even remember Marella saying something to me about that night, when Michael danced with Caitlin, and I was dancing with Marella. She told me how in love with me she thought Cait looked when we walked in together and wondered why I couldn't see it. And I'm not surprised that Michael figured out Caitlin's the woman I was talking about when I called him, Hawke thought.

"Ken Sawyer?" Michael gaped at Hawke in astonishment. "Hawke, for the love of God, please tell me you're kidding me!" Just from the look in his eyes, I know he isn't kidding. I knew I didn't want to know. Michael remembered his suspicion when Hawke phoned him. I was right, thinking that it was Sawyer's baby. However, I must admit, I wish to hell I'd been wrong about this.

"I wish to hell I was, but that's what Cait told me last night, Michael. Sawyer started dating—or rather, seducing—Caitlin to get to me, as well as Airwolf, which was his target all along. And from what Cait told me, Sawyer conned her into sleeping with him the night before he kidnapped her, and that's when the baby was conceived."

"He didn't?"—Michael couldn't finish his sentence, but Hawke instinctively knew what he was thinking.

"No, Michael, I don't think so. From everything Caitlin said, it was completely consensual. Of course, I don't know if he threatened to hurt Cait, or Dom or me, if she didn't let him sleep with her, but other than that, as far as I know, he didn't rape her."

"Thank God for that. Well, Hawke, I promise you—this will remain strictly confidential between you, Dom, Caitlin, Marella, Ron and me. I kind of had to explain what I thought was going on to Ron, you know, even though I wasn't sure Caitlin was the 'friend' you told me about when I talked to him, or that Sawyer was the father, although I had my suspicions about that as well," Michael said, feeling a wave of relief when Hawke nodded affirmatively. "And Marella asked me what was going on as we were on the way here, since she knew we didn't have a mission for you."

"I understand, Michael, and I wouldn't expect you to keep a secret from Marella, or Ron, especially not where it concerns Caitlin."

Michael nodded, then continued, "And if there's anything—and I mean anything—that I can do to help you and Cait, please don't hesitate to ask. Ron told me to tell you the same thing. If you need anything from him, just let me know. I'll get in touch with him, and he'll arrange whatever you need." And I certainly hope that one of the things I'll be calling Ron to 'arrange' is a wedding for you and Cait, along with whatever documentation we need to show that you, Hawke, are Cait's baby's father.

"I will, Michael, and thanks. For everything."

"You're welcome, Hawke. Let me say that I hope you make the right decision for once in your life. Even though I was against her learning how to fly Airwolf before, I must admit that Cait's become a very valuable part of the team, and I'd hate to lose her. After all, I owe her my life, just like you do, Hawke," Michael added. The same way that she owes you and Dom hers several times over. Michael remembered how Hawke and Dom had saved Caitlin from Sawyer, along with rescuing her, along with the passengers and crew of Flight 093, last year. Not to mention the time when those terrorists attacked her sorority reunion. Not to mention saving her from Bogan. Michael remembered the meeting Hawke and Dom had with the sheriff of Caitlin's hometown in Pope County, Texas. Moreover, saving her from Sawyer. I wish they'd been able to save her from getting pregnant, though. I can't imagine how embarrassed she is right now.

"I know you're right, Michael. Don't worry about it, though. If I have anything to say about it, we won't lose Cait," Hawke said as he shook Michael's hand and walked with Michael over to the limousine. Like I said, that's why I needed this information so quickly. Now, I can start making plans for how I'm going to convince Cait that I want to help her raise this baby, even though Sawyer was its father, Hawke thought.

"I'm glad to hear that, Hawke." As Michael climbed in the limo, he said, "We'll be talking again soon." Hawke nodded, and a short time later, he watched the limousine drive off.

As Michael and Marella rode back to FIRM Headquarters, Marella said, "So? Was your suspicion right, about Caitlin, and Sawyer?"

"Yes," Michael admitted, "Caitlin is pregnant, and Sawyer was the father of Caitlin's baby. Now I'm worried sick that because she's pregnant, Cait will stop flying for the FIRM permanently. Even though I was against her learning to fly Airwolf, I admitted to Hawke that Cait has become a valuable addition to the team, and I certainly don't want to lose her, if we can avoid it. After all, she helped Dominic and Hawke save my life when Kinskov captured me in East Germany, not to mention saving Hawke, Dom, and Airwolf from Horn."

"I understand, Michael," Marella said. "If there's anything I can do, please don't hesitate to ask."

"I'll remember you said that, Marella," Michael said, smiling at his aide.

Hawke was deep in thought about what he and Michael had talked about as Dom walked up to him.

"What'd Mr. Clean want?" Dom asked. "We going somewhere?"

"No, not this time, Dom. Michael was just bringing me some information I asked him about—about who has the rights to Cait's unborn baby. He told me that since Sawyer didn't have any family that they know about, Cait will have full rights, and can designate whomever she wants as the baby's father. Oh, and it turns out Michael did suspect that Cait was the woman with the baby, and that Sawyer was the father. In fact, Michael asked me if I thought Cait slept with Sawyer willingly, or if he raped her, and I told Michael that as far as I knew, it was totally consensual." Hawke was relieved that Caitlin had ducked into the office and wasn't within earshot of the conversation.

"Well, I'm not surprised that Whitey suspected Cait was the woman you were talking about, kid. And as to who she'd designate as the baby's father, I wonder who that'll be?" Hawke noticed a mischievous, yet hopeful twinkle in Dom's eye. I really hate to put a damper on your excitement, Dom, but in a way, I have to.

"Dom," Hawke said warningly, "don't go jumping to any conclusions here. Remember what you always told Sinj and me: 'Never assume anything, 'cause it just makes an 'ass' out of 'you,' and 'me.'. But," Hawke's tone had Dom concerned, until he saw Hawke smile. "You're definitely on the right track. I mean, if she'll have me, I want to be there for Cait, and for her baby, because I love her, like I told you before."

I was hoping you'd say that, String! And I get the feeling you're not gonna have to worry about it, because I remember what Caitlin said in Michael's limo that day. Just then, Caitlin walked up to join them.

"What'd Michael want?" Caitlin wanted to know. She had glanced out the office window and seen Michael's limousine, and that he was talking to Hawke.

"He was—just bringing me some information I asked about." Hawke suddenly glanced down at his wristwatch. "It's almost lunch time. Cait, would you like to join me? My treat," Hawke said, smiling at her.

"Stringfellow Hawke, I thought you'd never ask," Caitlin said with a smile, slipping her arm through his as they walked over to the food stand that was set up outside the hangar. A few minutes later, they sat down back in the office with their lunches.

"So how are you feeling, Cait?"

"Oh, I'm okay, most of the time, but I'll tell ya this—you wouldn't have wanted to see me when I woke up this morning! They don't call it 'morning sickness' for nothing, y'know!" In spite of herself, Caitlin grinned, and was relieved when Hawke smiled back at her.

"I know, Cait." Hawke replied. He remembered Saint John and Dom telling him stories about how their mother had been sick several times while she was pregnant with them both, and how Jane had told both boys that the sickness went away after a while. "But if it helps, Mom told Saint John and me that the morning sickness does go away after a while."

"That—does help, a little." Caitlin was shocked that String had mentioned his parents to her. He's never done that before, just mentioning his parents like that. Of course, he's never bought me lunch before, either. What in the heck is going on with him? I must admit, I like all this extra attention from String, even if I don't have the foggiest idea why he's giving it to me!

"String, I-I owe you an apology, too, for the way I've been treating you lately. I didn't understand why I've been so emotional lately, until I went to the doctor. Anyway," Caitlin let her voice drop, showing the embarrassment she felt, "I-I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Cait." Hawke smiled at her, and Caitlin wasn't surprised when Hawke's smile took her breath away. "I understand. Even though I didn't know what was bothering you any more than you did, I knew it had to be something important to have you that upset—I just didn't expect, well, you know. And besides, like Dom and I said, Mom was the same way with both Saint John and me." Hawke suddenly felt exceedingly embarrassed about the whole situation. Besides, when I think of how I've treated you the last year or so, the past couple of days seems like nothing to me, he thought.

"Yeah, I do know," Caitlin said, "and, thanks." She smiled at String, a genuinely warm, friendly smile, and was surprised to see him return her smile with one of his own. He does look good when he smiles! Caitlin smiled as she remembered what Bobby Phelps had told him a few weeks ago. Even better than he usually looks. Caitlin forced her emotions aside as she turned her attention back to her lunch. Then, she remembered how her mother had been badgering her to come home to Texas, find a good man, settle down, and start having kids. Well, Caitlin thought, sadly looking down at her belly, I've got the having kids part covered, so if I did go back, any man I might start dating would have to accept that I'm part of a package deal—he'd have to accept my baby along with me. I don't know of many men back home who would do that. Not to mention the fact that like I thought before, I don't want to go home and have to try to explain my baby to Mom, or Erin. Because Mom would think that String was the father, and both she and Erin would want to fly right back out here and give him a piece of their minds for getting me pregnant and not marrying me. And I don't doubt for one minute that Mom and Erin would both want to beat the snot out of String, even though he has nothing to do with the fact that I'm pregnant. And then there's the reputation thing—I mean, if it got out that I slept with a guy I wasn't married to, and was pregnant with his baby, even though he's dead, who knows what that'd do to my reputation, especially since I can't explain why I was involved with that bastard Sawyer, without revealing anything about Airwolf.

I know how Mom and Erin are when they get mad, though. It's almost like the circuit between their ears and their brains shorts out, and they don't hear a word that anybody tries to say to them. Just like I thought before, I've just got to figure this mess out on my own.

There's something I've gotta know, Hawke thought anxiously. "Cait, ah, there's something I need to know. When this happened, did Sawyer, well"—Hawke hesitated, but Caitlin knew what he was asking just from the look in his eyes.

"No, String. It-it wasn't rape. I was so hypnotized by Sawyer and what he was telling me, that when he said he wanted to sleep with me, I-I said yes." And I'm embarrassed as hell about it, she thought, 'cause even though you don't know it, I-I wanted you to be my first, String. But that'll never happen now. Heck, I'm surprised you're even still talking to me, now that you know what's going on with me. At least, maybe, we can still be friends, even after what I let Sawyer do to me. I don't know if I could go on if I lost you as a friend, String. That's how much our friendship means to me, even though I wish you were more than just the best friend I've ever had. Just then, Hawke began talking, and Caitlin pulled herself back into the conversation.

"That's a relief," Hawke said. "If he'd raped you, Caitlin, then Dom and I both would have wanted to tear him limb from limb."

"Well, I can't say I blame you for that. Heck, if he had raped me and I'd been with you, I would have wanted you to force that sonofabitch down, so I could kick his rear end myself. And, you know I could've done it, right?"

"Of course, you could have, and I know you could have. Like you told us before, you know karate, and you give free samples. I haven't forgotten that, Caitlin." Hawke smiled at her, and Caitlin paused a moment before answering him, as his smile had taken her breath away, again.

"That's good to know, String. And yeah, if he had raped me and I'd been with you, I would have wanted to help you guys tear him apart, but he-he didn't."

Hawke sat silent for a moment, which caused Caitlin to worry. Finally, he said, "I'm-I'm sorry, Caitlin. Michael just asked me about it when he stopped by earlier, and I told him that as far as I knew, what happened wasn't rape, but that I wasn't sure."

I sure hope that doesn't change anything between us, Caitlin thought worriedly. "I understand, String, and it's okay." She smiled warmly at him as she went back to her lunch but was still worried about how Hawke felt about her revelation. I thought I saw Michael talking to String, but I couldn't tell what they were talking about. I guess I shouldn't be surprised it was about me, though, and the mess I've gotten myself into. Finally, Caitlin pushed the remains of her lunch away, and smiled at Hawke.

"Um, thanks for lunch, String," Caitlin said a few minutes later.

"Sure, Cait. Anytime." Hawke smiled warmly at her, and was relieved to see a warm, friendly smile from her in return. "Oh, and by the way, Cait, I wanted to apologize for the way I ran out of your apartment yesterday. That was just quite a shock, finding out you were pregnant, and that Sawyer was the father of the baby. Anyway, I'm sorry."

"It's okay, String." Caitlin smiled weakly at Hawke before they went back to work.

That night when Caitlin went home, she thought about Hawke's actions earlier that afternoon. I'd sure like to know what in the heck's going on with him, but I have to admit, I like it! Aw, heck, who am I kidding? I love all this extra attention! She recalled the easy conversation they'd had during lunch—he hadn't brought up the baby once, other than when String asked if Sawyer had raped her, and Hawke's voice, during their conversation, had been friendlier than she could recall him being to her in a very long time. If I didn't know better, I'd think that String—Nah. That can't happen. I can sure dream it did, though. 'Cause even though Mom doesn't think so, the best man I know, and the perfect man to help me raise my baby, is right here in California—Stringfellow Hawke.

Over the next few weeks, Hawke began paying Caitlin more attention, which made her happier than she'd been in a long time—actually, the happiest I've been since I found out I was pregnant. Caitlin was not surprised when, after they closed the hangar, Hawke took her out to dinner again. Now I know something's going on with String, and I hope like heck it never changes! He's been taking me out to dinner every night for the past few weeks, and I must admit, I love that he's doing it, even if I don't have a clue why. Caitlin felt a surge of excitement when Hawke dropped her at her apartment that night before he went back to the hangar, especially after he kissed her goodnight. As she fell asleep that night, Caitlin couldn't help but envision a ceremony on the dock back at Hawke's cabin—the two of them, Dom, a judge, her mother, and older sister Erin, and maybe Michael and Marella—as she and String exchanged wedding vows. I hope it happens, soon. Her momentary excitement collapsed around her as a horrible thought crossed her mind. I don't know why, but I get a funny feeling that String's new attitude is just because of my baby, and I don't think I like that at all. Besides, I'm still terrified about what Hawke thinks about me sleeping with Sawyer, even though it's nobody's business but mine who I sleep with. But Hawke's opinion matters to me, because of how much I love him. So, if he's mad about what happened with Sawyer, I'll never be able to forgive myself.

She sighed as she thought of how much she hated herself for doing what she had done. I–I wanted String to be my first, not that dirtbag, she thought sadly. That'll never happen now, just like I'm afraid String will never forgive me for sleeping with Sawyer, and he'll hate me for the rest of my life. Caitlin felt herself becoming more despondent, and finally was able to cry herself to sleep.

Michael's right. Hawke realized a few things back at the cabin as he watched Dom's chopper fly away. I—I do owe Cait my life, after what happened with Horn, in addition to what happened on that island. After everything she's been through, and survived—could she be the woman I'm supposed to be with?

Something Michael had said struck Hawke as extremely funny. 'Even though I was against Caitlin learning how to fly Airwolf before...' Hawke smiled as he recalled Caitlin telling him about Michael's reaction when she said, "I can fly her!"

She told me Michael looked like he was about to blow a fuse, proverbially speaking. I guess I can understand that, though. Even though I wasn't there, I can imagine how shocked Michael was when Cait announced that Dom and I had taught her to fly the Lady. Then Hawke's mind went back to the situation at hand. Hawke's thoughts were in turmoil for the rest of the evening, and as he lay down to try to sleep later that night, he couldn't help but picture Caitlin's face again. We can't lose you now, Cait. I can't lose you now, and I'll do whatever I have to do to make sure we don't. He couldn't help but recall how Tess Dixon had run away from him, after she told him about their baby. I couldn't make Caitlin go through what I did, he thought, and I won't, even though the circumstances aren't quite the same. Cait needs to know how I feel, and I'm going to tell her the truth. That I've been in love with her for a very long time, and even though she slept with Sawyer, that hasn't changed. I mean, I know she said it wasn't rape, but that doesn't mean he didn't con her into it, somehow. And if I'm being perfectly honest with myself, I'll bet that if Caitlin knew how I felt about her, she never would have let Sawyer con her into sleeping with him, or even let him take her out that first time. His mind made up, Hawke was finally able to fall asleep, and was not surprised when Caitlin's smiling face appeared in his thoughts. Her beautiful face, Hawke thought as he fell asleep.

"String?" Dom asked the next morning as they flew back to the hangar from his cabin. "Have you told Cait how you—?"

"No, Dom," Hawke admitted. "But I think I will—tonight."

"Well, all I can say is—it's about time, String!" Dom said happily.

"I know, Dom," Hawke was surprised at how nervous he was suddenly becoming. It's only going to get worse tonight. He remembered how he'd wondered how Caitlin felt about him, before they found out she was pregnant. I mean, I think I know how she feels, but it's the uncertainty that makes me nervous. Like Dom always told both Saint John and me: 'Never assume anything, 'cause it just makes an 'ass,' out of 'you,' and 'me.' I suppose I'll find out tonight.

"I hate to ask you this, kid, and if I'm outta line here, you tell me, but did Sawyer?"—Dom couldn't finish his sentence, but Hawke knew what he was asking.

"No, Dom. I asked Cait about that the other day, because Michael asked me about it when he stopped by. Caitlin told me that it was completely consensual. Sawyer didn't rape her, but I have the funniest feeling that he conned her into letting him sleep with her, somehow."

"Well, thank God for that," Dom said, and was surprised when Hawke nodded in agreement. "If he had, I would have begged you to force that bastard down so that you and I could tear him apart piece by piece."

"I know, Dom," Hawke said as he saw the hangar come into view, "and I told Caitlin exactly that. Heck, I wish I could've forced the bastard down, trussed him like the pig he was, and dragged his sorry ass back to the ship to give Caitlin a few shots at him, too. I've gotta be honest, though—I kinda blame myself for this whole thing. I mean, if I'd had the balls to tell Caitlin how I feel from the start, then maybe she could've told Sawyer 'no' that first time she met him."

"String, if Cait had told Sawyer 'no,' I have the worst feeling that he would have gone ahead and done it anyway, and then it would have been rape." Dom shot back. "I've heard of guys like Sawyer doing that to a woman they want to keep quiet, y'know?" I bet Caitlin would have loved to help us tear Sawyer apart, if String had given us the chance, Dom thought. Even though String said it wasn't rape, I had a feeling she didn't sleep with that rat completely on her own. I mean, I figured he conned her into it, somehow, just the same way String thought.

"Yeah, Dom," Hawke replied. "I do know. I guess I meant that if Caitlin had known how I felt, she could have told Sawyer 'no' when he first asked her out, and she wouldn't have even been in a situation where he would have wanted to sleep with her."

"I understand, String, but there's no point in beating yourself up over what happened in the past. I guess the important thing here is that you've figured out how you feel about Cait."

"Yeah. I know, Dom. I just wish to hell it hadn't taken something like this to get me to admit my feelings. But," he added, recognizing Dom's expression, "you and Sinj always did say I was the stubborn one, so I guess this shouldn't surprise me."

"It doesn't surprise me, in the least!" Dom laughed as they went back into the hangar.

That night, Hawke took Caitlin out again for dinner. As they waited for their meals, Hawke finally said, "Caitlin, there's something I want to talk to you about." I sure hope she can't tell how nervous I am, he thought. My heart's in my throat right now, considering what I'm about to say.

"Yes, String?" I sure hope he doesn't notice how nervous I am right about now. But then again, I'm probably no more nervous than he is. She had noticed the tone of his voice when he started to speak, and Caitlin hoped her own voice didn't convey her feelings the same way his did. I'm surprised he can't hear my heart beating in my chest, though, she thought anxiously. It feels like a jackhammer in there.

"Well, Cait," Hawke smiled as he reached over and took her hands in his, "Ever since I found out about—well, you know—I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I realize that I've been fighting, and denying, something for far too long." Well, here goes everything. He took a deep breath, then looked into Caitlin's eyes and said, "Caitlin, I love you, and I'm in love with you. I've been in love with you for a very long time, but I've just been too stubborn, and stupid, to admit it before now." Hawke watched Caitlin's face for her reaction and was surprised when a frown creased her face.

God, please tell me String didn't just say that because of the baby! I swear, I'll never ask you for anything again as long as I live! Could ya just give me that one thing, God? Please? "String," she said in a tone of voice that made Hawke even more nervous, "are you just saying that because I'm pregnant?" I'm not sure I want to know the answer to that question. Caitlin felt a surge of anxiety when she remembered what she'd thought about the night before.

"No, Cait," Hawke said, looking into her eyes, and hoping she could see the honesty in his. "I'm not just saying that because of your baby. I-I've been in love with you for a long time—probably ever since I first saw you back in Pope County. Like I said, I've just been too stubborn, and stupid, to admit it before now. But I understand why you feel that way, and I-I guess I wouldn't blame you if you didn't believe me," Hawke added. As much as I hate to admit it, I knew that was coming, and it doesn't surprise me in the least. I just hope she can accept that I mean what I said, and we can move on—together.

Wow! Guess God heard me! Caitlin felt a wave of excitement pass through her as she realized what Hawke had just told her. Then, she noticed Hawke smiling at her, and wondered how long he would wait before saying something else to her.

After what felt to Hawke like way too long, Caitlin finally squeezed his hand and said, "I—I believe you, String. I feel the same way about you. I think I've been in love with you ever since that day, too. I've just been waiting, and hoping that you'd figure out your feelings someday," she said, her eyes glistening with tears. Waiting, hoping, and praying is more like it.

"Caitlin, I'm sorry that I took so long to figure out my feelings," Hawke replied. "But I promise you that I'm going to spend the rest of our lives trying to make up for it. And," he said, "I'm going to be there for you and for your baby, if you'll let me."

Wow! Caitlin felt another surge of excitement when she heard Hawke say, 'the rest of our lives.' He must be more serious than I thought! She excitedly recalled her dream of a couple of nights ago; when she dreamed she and Hawke got married. Maybe it's going to happen! Then her momentary excitement came crashing down around her again. I can't shake the feeling that the only reason String is saying all these wonderful things—everything I've always hoped and prayed that I'd hear him say—is because of the baby. I—I have to know, whether I want to know, or not.

"What's wrong, Cait?" Hawke suddenly felt himself getting worried. I thought she'd be happy that I finally pulled my head outta my rear end and admitted my feelings for her. She sure doesn't seem happy, though.

"String, I-I know what you said a minute ago, and I believe you, but I-I just can't shake this feeling that you only said that because of—well—my situation. I mean, you're the most honorable guy I think I've ever met, and I can't shake this feeling that everything you're doing is just so I don't look bad to Mom, and everybody else in my family, because I've had a baby with a man I wasn't married to and all that garbage. And I don't think I like that."

Hawke felt a momentary surge of anger at Caitlin's declaration, until he considered it for a moment. It makes perfect sense when I think about it with a clear head. I've been basically ignoring her for so long, and now that she's pregnant, even though the baby isn't even mine, here I am confessing that I love her and paying more attention to her in the last couple of days than I have in the last two years. Finally, Hawke felt calm enough to say what he knew he needed to say.

"Cait," he began, "I understand why you feel the way you do, and I don't blame you for feeling that way. I mean, like I said before, I've been stupid these last couple of years, pushing you away the way I have been, all because of the curse I think I have on myself and all that. But," he said, smiling at her, "please believe me when I tell you that what I'm feeling isn't new—and it isn't because of your situation. I've been denying these feelings for too long, Caitlin. Maybe this situation just gave me a kick in the rear end to acknowledge what I've been fighting for so long—how I feel about you—but I'm going to do whatever I have to do to show you that my feelings are real. I promise you that." Just then, the waiter came with their meals, and Caitlin reluctantly disengaged her hands from Hawke's, so they could both eat.

"String," Caitlin began a moment later, "it's just going to take some getting used to—this whole thing with you and me. But," she smiled warmly at Hawke, "If you're serious, then I'm glad to hear that you've finally figured out how you feel."

"So am I, Cait. So am I." Hawke smiled at Caitlin and was relieved when she smiled warmly back at him. And, I'm not surprised you said, 'If you're serious,' Caitlin. Well, I'll just prove to you that I am serious about how I feel about you, and that I'm not saying all these things to you because you're pregnant.

After dinner, as Hawke drove them back to the hangar, Caitlin said, "String, please don't take anything I've said the wrong way. It's not that I don't love you—I do. I just—"

"You just need some time, and you want to know that I'm serious about you, that I'm not doing this so that you won't look bad to your family, like you told me," Hawke said, and Caitlin nodded. "I understand, and even though I don't like it, I'll wait as long as you need me to. I mean, I kept you waiting for me to figure out my feelings for two years, so it seems only fair that I wait a little while you figure yours out. I meant what I said, though, Caitlin. If you'll let me, I'm going to be there for you and the baby, because I do love you."

"Thanks, String," Caitlin replied. "But I promise—it won't take too long." She squeezed his hand as they approached the hangar. Especially since I know String—he doesn't say something like what he said a minute ago if he doesn't mean it. That applies to everything he said during dinner, too. I can't believe it! He finally admitted that he loves me! Then, her words from a few minutes ago rang in her head again. 'If you're serious, then I'm glad you've figured out how you feel.' Geez, that was dumb! String doesn't say things like what he said tonight if he doesn't mean them, like I thought before! I sure hope my big stupid mouth hasn't screwed things up between us before they even get started! But, that'd be typical of my luck－I have a chance to take Stringfellow Hawke off the market, permanently－and I blow it.

"I'm glad to hear that, Cait."

"String, when you left my apartment that day, I-I was so scared. I was afraid you hated me because of what happened, and I was scared to death that you'd never speak to me again."

I knew it. Hawke recalled thinking nearly the same thing the day it happened. "I understand, Cait, but as far as me hating you for what happened, I could never hate you—after all, you're my best friend, Cait, even though I don't treat you like it sometimes. Now, Sawyer, that's another story entirely, but he's dead. I'm sorry I ran out on you like that, but I-I just needed a little time to process everything I'd seen, and everything you'd told me that day. I mean, it's not very often you find out your best friend is pregnant, and that the father of her baby tried to kill her." Caitlin nodded her understanding. I know what String's like better'n anybody, except maybe Dom. So, it makes perfect sense, what he said.

"But, I promise you, like I said before—my feelings are real, and I'll do whatever I have to do to prove that to you," Hawke added.

"I appreciate that, String," Caitlin said with a smile directed toward him. Probably more than you know, Stringfellow Hawke. "And," she said, smiling, "thanks. You're my best friend, too, in case you didn't already know that." I have a feeling you're going to be a lot more than that, soon. At least, I hope you will be, even after that stupid 'if you're serious' comment I made a few minutes ago.

"Thanks, Cait. And I promise you that if you'll let me, I'm going to spend the rest of our lives making up for the way I've treated you in the past and making you happier than you ever thought possible." Hawke glanced over at Caitlin and was relieved when she smiled warmly back at him. "And," he added, "I want you to understand that I'm not doing any of this because I'm worried about how this will look to your mom, or anything like that. I'm doing this because I love you, and I don't want to lose you, Caitlin."

How in the heck did he know what I was thinking, anyway? Caitlin wondered, knowing that exact thought had crossed her mind before. "I-I appreciate that, String. I must admit, I've wondered if everything you've been doing since you found out was because you didn't want me to look bad in front of Mom, or the rest of my family, or anything like that, but I wanted you to know something. I-I don't want you to think that you have to do anything for me—I mean, if I did go back to Texas, once they got over the shock of finding out I'm pregnant, I know that my family would help me for a while until I got settled, so you wouldn't have to worry."

"Caitlin, haven't you listened to a thing I've been saying?" Hawke demanded. He thought he needed to look her in the eyes, so he pulled off the road and shut off the Jeep, finally turning and gazing deeply into her hazel eyes. "Listen to me. I love you, Caitlin, and I'm in love with you. I have been practically since the day I met you, even though I've been denying it for so long. And I have to be honest—I probably would have told you this even if you weren't pregnant, because I'm tired of hiding from how I feel about you. I'm just embarrassed that it took this to get me to admit my feelings."

Caitlin felt tears spring up in her eyes again. "Thank you, String, and I understand. And I'm-I'm sorry for what I said. I-I guess all these feelings are just so new that they're a little scary. Y'know?" Not to mention, any time you ever said something like that to me before, you've been teasing me, or being sarcastic. I sure hope neither one is the case, this time.

"Yeah, I know, Caitlin. And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, too. But," he said, smiling lovingly at her, "I promise you, we'll get through this. Together, if you'll have me, like I said before. I'll tell you this, Caitlin—I'd rather be scared with you, than brave, without you. And, apology accepted." He gave her a short, yet loving kiss before he started the jeep back up.

Once they had arrived back at the hangar, Hawke kissed Caitlin goodnight more thoroughly and passionately than she could ever recall him, or any other man she had ever dated, kissing her. When he finally separated them, Caitlin felt more loved than she could ever recall feeling in her entire life. I didn't think it was possible to feel as much love, not to mention as much in love, as I did when you kissed me just now, String. Between all the wonderful things you've said to me tonight, and that kiss, you may have just made my decision a heckuva lot easier. Finally, she got into her car and drove off for home, as String walked into the hangar to meet Dom.

"You kids had a nice time, I gather?" Dom asked.

"Yeah, we did." String said as they climbed into the chopper to head back to the cabin. "Cait just told me she needs a little time to figure out her feelings, that's all. She did say something that threw me, though. She said, 'If you're serious, then I'm glad you finally figured out how you feel.'"

"Well, you can't completely blame her for that, can you?" Dom asked. "I mean, after all, you've been denying your feelings about her for—"

"Dom, I know. I don't blame her, though, because you're right. I have been denying my feelings about Cait for too long, and it makes sense that even though I told her that I love her tonight, she still has doubts that I'm only doing this because she's pregnant. Well, I'll just have to show her that I am serious, and that I'm not just doing this because of the baby." String turned to look at Dom, and the expression in his eyes left no doubts in Dom's mind about how String felt.

"Well, kid, all I'm going to say is that I doubt it's going to take Cait long to figure her feelings out!" Dom said as they landed on the dock. As String climbed out of the helicopter, he said, "I hope you're right, Dom!" Then he closed the door and stepped back as Dom throttled the helicopter back up and headed back towards Van Nuys. I sure hope you're right. Hawke stood on the dock and watched as Dom's helicopter faded into the distance, then walked back into the cabin.

Not to mention, Hawke sat staring at the fire with a glass of wine, his thoughts still in turmoil, I don't know why, but I've got a feeling that there's another reason Cait's hesitating, and wonders if I'm serious about my feelings. She's embarrassed about the fact that she slept with Sawyer, and she's afraid that I hate her because of it, even though I told her I don't. Well, I'll just have to tell her that it's none of my business who she sleeps with. At least, it wasn't my business when this happened. Besides all that, there's the fact that up until tonight, whenever I've told her things like that, I've been teasing her or being sarcastic, so I'm sure that didn't help.

That night before he went to bed, Hawke made a decision. Wait a second. There's nothing against me trying to help Cait make her decision, right? He smiled as he considered his plan for the next morning. Fortunately, I know a florist that's open early, and they deliver. This should work out just fine. Satisfied, Hawke imagined Caitlin's reaction when his plan came to fruition. It'd be nice if I got there before the flowers did, but if not, that's okay too. Other than that, though, I'm just going to give Cait whatever time she needs to make her decision. I mean, I know what happens when Cait has somebody bugging her about something—I've seen it when she argues with her mother. So, the best thing I can do is just let her make up her mind on her own, without any interference or pressure from me, other than the flowers I'm gonna have sent to the hangar tomorrow. That should show her that my feelings are real, and that I meant what I said. I-I just hope it doesn't take too long for her to figure out how she feels about me.

As Dom flew back to the hangar, he thought about everything he'd heard from String. Boy, do I hate being right, especially now. I guess I'm not surprised Cait needs a little time, though. I don't blame her for thinking String's only doing this because she's pregnant, even though I know better. I just hope things work out. He brought his helicopter down outside the hangar, then closed everything down and went home.

Caitlin, meanwhile, was thinking about everything that had happened that night as she drove home. I can't believe it—but Hawke doesn't hate me for what happened. In fact, he told me he loves me tonight! And even though I told him I needed some time to figure out my feelings, I—I can't deny how much I love him. How much I've always loved him. Somehow, I don't think it's going to be long before I tell String, either. 'Cause when he kissed me goodnight, I felt loved. I felt the love String says he has for me—something I never felt when Ken kissed me, the few times he did kiss me, that is. And String's never complained once when I've sent him out on an errand to pick me up something to eat, even when I asked him to get pickles and chocolate ice cream for me yesterday. And I know String—he doesn't say things like he did tonight if he doesn't mean them.

And, String has bent over backwards to make sure I don't do too much around the hangar, not to mention giving me a couple of great back rubs. I didn't even have to ask him for those, either. He did it because he saw how much I was hurting because the baby was kicking me, and, because he loves me. Most important, though, at least to me, String hasn't said a word about what happened with Sawyer. He didn't say anything to judge me for what happened, and he's willing to help me raise my baby. He didn't so much as bat an eye when he told me he wanted to be there for me, and for my baby, which makes me love him even more than I already do. She recalled thinking that any man she might fall in love with would have to accept her baby along with her. String already does accept that I'm pregnant, though. He wouldn't have done everything he's done since he found out, if he didn't accept my baby, even though Sawyer was the father. There's something else that I haven't even thought of, until just now. It wouldn't be right for me to date somebody else, since my heart belongs to String. I think it has ever since I met him, even though it took him so danged long to accept it, and to acknowledge how he felt. I think that's why I've never had a serious relationship since I met String, 'cause I've just been waiting for him to pull his head out of his ass and admit how he feels, the way he did tonight.

Then, Caitlin remembered again something she'd said while they were eating. "If you're serious, then I'm glad you finally figured out how you feel." Geez, that was dumb, Caity girl! You know Stringfellow Hawke better than that—if he said he's going to be there for you and the baby, then he will! If he said he loves you, then dammit, you ought to know he meant it! You know danged well String never says stuff like that if he doesn't mean it! Like you thought before, Caity girl, you just better hope—and pray—that your big stupid mouth hasn't gone and screwed this up! Now I know what Daddy meant when he told Erin and me, 'Do not operate tongue unless brain is engaged.' 'Cause my brain obviously wasn't when I said that. I-I just hope String can forgive me for it, someday.

Almost immediately, though, she remembered how Hawke had kissed her goodnight. He wouldn't have done that if he were mad at me. Caitlin felt herself relaxing as she remembered how it felt to be in Hawke's arms, the way she'd always wanted to be, and how it felt when he kissed her so passionately, without someone beseeching him to make the kiss more 'realistic.' 'Cause that kiss was about as 'realistic' as you could get. Something else Hawke told her rang in her head just then – "I'm going to spend the rest of our lives making up for the way I treated you in the past.' 'The rest of our lives,' he said, and he told me we'll get through this, 'together, if you'll have me,' and he said he'd 'rather be scared with you, than be brave without you.' God in Heaven, he must be serious! I know Stringfellow Hawke—he never says things like that, if he doesn't mean them! I remember when I found out I was pregnant, I thought I'd decided I'd give my baby up for adoption, but now, maybe I won't have to. 'Cause it seems like String wants to help me, even though I was so sure he wouldn't when he found out whose kid it is. She fell asleep with a smile on her face for the first time since she found out she was pregnant. Then, Caitlin remembered something she'd thought the day she found out she was pregnant. String does love me, just the way I hoped he did! It wasn't my ego talking, or my imagination running away with me! And, Caitlin thought as something else Hawke had told her crossed her mind, String already has made me happier than I ever thought it was possible for me to be, just by everything he's done, and by saying that he loves me! As she fell asleep, as had happened many nights since she met him, and more often recently, Caitlin found Hawke's smiling face at the forefront of her thoughts. Then, another of Hawke's comments went through her mind. "I'd rather be scared with you, than brave, without you."

Oh, String! I feel the same way, Caitlin thought as she fell asleep.

The next morning when Caitlin arrived at the hangar, she found a deliveryman waiting for her with a bouquet of a dozen roses. Once she'd given the deliveryman a nice tip, Caitlin looked for the card and smiled through the happy tears that erupted in her eyes when she found it.

"I'm not doing this to put any pressure on you, Cait. I just hope these help—and just like I told you last night, it's because I love you. Love, String."

Oh, String. You bet they help! She sighed happily, as she found a vase and put her flowers in water, then opened the hangar and waited for Hawke and Dom to arrive. Well, if that doesn't prove that String's not mad at me for that comment yesterday, then I don't know what would! I'm seriously thinking it's not going to be very long before I tell him about my feelings. Caitlin felt happier than she'd been in a long time, as she finished opening the hangar and waited for String and Dom to arrive.

They arrived a few minutes later, and Caitlin's heart leaped when she saw String sitting in the co-pilot's chair and smiling at her. She walked out to meet Dom and Hawke, smiling.

"Good morning, Dom," Caitlin said as String stepped out of the helicopter. "Morning, String," she said a second later as she wrapped her arms around String's neck and kissed him. She felt Hawke's arms wrap around her waist as he kissed her back. This must be the greatest feeling in the world, being in String's arms. I never felt this way when Ken held me—so–so alive, and so in love. This—this feels right. It feels like—like I belong in String's arms, just like this. Caitlin sighed happily as she and Hawke kissed each other. Just like when he kissed me goodnight last night, I can feel how much String loves me! Caitlin happily thought back to something she'd thought the day she found out she was pregnant. I guess 'slim' didn't walk out the door, after all! Maybe I will be the woman who finally takes Stringfellow Hawke off the market! God in Heaven, I hope so!

Finally, String separated them, and when he caught his breath, he said, "I take it you got the flowers?"

"Yeah, String." Caitlin replied, beaming. "They were here when I got here. And," she said, her eyes shining, "I appreciate how your note said, 'I'm not doing this to put pressure on you,' but I wanted to let you know that they did help. More than you know." Dom smiled at Cait's words, trying to mask how excited he'd become—and knowing he'd failed miserably.

"I'm glad," Hawke said, smiling at her. Suddenly, he tightened his arms around Caitlin as he felt her slipping out of his grasp. "Cait? You okay?" He asked, suddenly concerned.

"I'm fine, String." Caitlin replied, smiling up at him. "It's just—that smile of yours always makes me weak in the knees." She felt herself blushing slightly at Hawke, but he simply nodded and smiled at her again.

"I understand, Cait," Hawke said as he helped her get her balance back. She didn't let go of Hawke, though, as they started walking back towards the hangar.

"String," Caitlin said happily, as they walked back to the hangar, arms around each other's waists, "you don't know how much it meant to me to find those roses here this morning. Between getting those roses and your good-night kiss last night, I—I think you made my decision a heckuva lot easier," she said, planting a gentle kiss on Hawke's cheek. Not to mention that kiss you just laid on me. Caitlin still felt the emotions from Hawke's kiss. "Oh, by the way, String," she added, "I had a wonderful time at dinner last night." Dom smiled at Caitlin's comment.

"I hope so," Hawke replied, and then added, "I'm glad. And," he smiled at Caitlin, "so did I." Dom was still smiling at String and Caitlin as they went back to work.

Hawke made a decision as he watched Caitlin walk into the office. I'm not gonna say, or do, anything about her decision, or the baby, at least until tonight. Maybe the flowers were enough to help her make the right decision about me, and about us. I sure hope so. Even so, Hawke made sure that whenever Caitlin needed a snack, he was able to go and get something for her, and; after lunch, he noticed Caitlin's back was bothering her and walked up behind her to give her a back rub.

"Ooh, that feels good, String," Caitlin said, sighing happily as she felt the tension leave her back. "But, how did you know the baby was kicking me again?"

"I thought I saw something on your face, Caitlin," Hawke said, smiling at her. "Glad I was right, and glad I was able to help."

"You sure did help, String," Caitlin said, smiling up at him. "Thanks." 'Thanks' doesn't even begin to cover how I feel right now, she thought, sighing happily again as she considered everything Hawke had done for her that day. I can't believe String is doing all this for me, especially since it's Sawyer's baby I'm carrying, but I love him even more for everything he's doing!

Hawke smiled at her, again, then gently kissed her cheek. "Anytime," he said, before turning and walking away. Almost blew it, he thought. But, I knew her back was bothering her, like I said, because I saw something in her face. And I can't just ignore it when she's hurting like I knew she was a few minutes ago. I wonder if that made any difference as far as her decision. Hawke sighed, and thought, I guess I'll find out later.

By the time they closed the hangar, Caitlin knew what she wanted to say to Hawke. That tears it! After everything String's done since he found out about the baby, I can't—and I won't—deny how much I love him anymore. She remembered three times that day alone that she'd sent Hawke running for ice cream, chips, and cookies because she was hungry. He ran every time, without complaining even once. Not to mention giving me another awesome back rub after lunch, just 'cause I looked like my back was hurting. It was, 'cause the baby was kicking again, but I didn't even have to say anything, or even grab the small of my back the way I've done before when the baby's been kicking me. String just, knew, and did it, without me even asking him to. Not to mention the fact that he hasn't brought up anything about the baby or my decision all day long. It's as though he's just waiting for me to make up my mind about how I feel, and I have made up my mind, doggone it! I never should've told String that I 'needed some time to figure out my feelings,' because doggone it, I don't! I can't deny how much I love String, or the fact that I've loved him ever since I laid eyes on him back in Pope County, and I'm going to tell him that tonight. I just hope that stupid 'if you're serious' comment hasn't screwed up my chance to be with String, the way I want to—as his wife! Well, if it did screw it up, I've got nobody to blame but myself and my big, stupid mouth!

That night, Hawke took Caitlin out to dinner again, and their conversation centered on Hawke's feelings about finding out Cait was pregnant.

"I have to admit that I was shocked," Hawke said, after Caitlin brought up what he thought when she told him that Sawyer was the father of her baby, "especially when you told me that Sawyer was the father. I mean, I knew you loved him—or at least, you thought you loved him—but I never thought you would have slept with him. Not that it's any of my business who you sleep with, Cait."

"String, if I had any idea how you felt about me, then I never would have let Sawyer talk me into sleeping with him, or even going out with him that first time." Caitlin said. Hawke nodded, even as he saw Caitlin's emotion in her hazel eyes. "I think I only let it happen 'cause from the time he came to the hangar asking about flying lessons, he was saying all the right things to me. The things I-I wanted you to say to me, String," Caitlin admitted. She was relieved when Hawke nodded again, and smiled at her, and Caitlin felt like she could continue her explanation.

"And there's something else about him. Yeah, he was a good-looking man, and he acted sweet in the beginning, but he was a rat, through and through. Even though I was obviously physically attracted to him, I-I didn't love him, String. At least, not the way I love you. I know it looked like I did, especially that night when we left the hangar, but I'll tell you the truth, String. The whole time I was with him, I–I was secretly wishing I was with you. I-I hope you know that, and I really hope you believe me." I wouldn't blame you if you didn't believe me, though. Especially after that stupid 'If you're serious' comment I made last night. I sure hope that dumb comment doesn't wreck any chance I have of being with you, String. If it did, there's nobody to blame but my big, stupid mouth, and myself, she thought sadly. But that'd be typical of my luck, she thought. Just when I've got everything I want—mainly String—right in the palm of my hand, I go and say something stupid like I did last night and screw it up! At least, if it's not already screwed up because of what happened! I guess I can agree with String, though—it wasn't any of his business, what happened. But, if he'll still have me, I can guarantee I'll never sleep with anybody but Stringfellow Hawke for the rest of my life!

"I do, Cait." Hawke smiled and squeezed her hand reassuringly. "I know, and I believe you, and most important, I blame myself for that. I mean, if I had just told you how I felt that night before you and Sawyer left, or even the first time I saw him flirting with you, then maybe that whole thing wouldn't have—"

"String, stop it! Just stop that talk right now! Do you hear me? I don't want you to blame yourself for this, at least not completely! Although, knowing you the way I do, it doesn't surprise me that you're trying to figure out a way to blame yourself for this mess I'm in, but I'm telling you—this is not your fault! After all, I'm the one who acted like a desperate, hormonal sixteen-year-old kid again and fell head-over-heels in love with Sawyer, I'm the one who bought all the BS he was spouting, and I'm the one who was dumb enough to let him talk me into letting him sleep with me! I mean, okay, if it'll make you feel better, and get you to stop worrying so much about it, I guess I can admit that maybe if I'd known how you felt about me things would've been different. The point is, I didn't know, and we can't change what happened, so there's no point in either one of us beating ourselves up over it—especially you, String.

"Besides, Sawyer probably would've done everything he did even if I had known how you felt about me, and been able to tell him 'no.' Like I told ya, String, he only got close to me because I knew you, and then he slept with me so that I'd keep my mouth shut. And if I had known how you felt and told him no, or if I hadn't been so hypnotized by his BS and hadn't let him do what he wanted with me, and to me, then he-he probably would've just done it anyway, and maybe threatened to hurt you, Dom, or me if I tried to warn you guys about what he was planning to do. I've got to tell you, though, that's why I was hoping I'd screwed up that home pregnancy test, knowing that it was Sawyer's baby I was carrying. I've been feeling pretty darned disgusted with myself since it happened, y'know what I mean?"

The fear in Caitlin's eyes just then made Hawke shudder involuntarily, and he hoped it wasn't too obvious to Caitlin. If he'd raped you, Cait, then I really would have wanted to tear him limb from limb, even more than I already did when he kidnapped you and told me about the bomb that he had strapped to you. I hate that I was right, thinking that you didn't sleep with Sawyer completely willingly, though. Then, something Caitlin had said rang in Hawke's head again. 'I'm the one who fell head–over–heels in love with Sawyer…' I really hope you didn't mean that, Caitlin, he thought, pulling himself back into the present when Caitlin spoke again.

Caitlin continued, "It doesn't matter anymore, String. What happened in the past belongs there—in the past. I can't go back and undo what I did, and you can't either. All we can do is move forward. And," Caitlin said, smiling, "I'd really like to move forward together, with you." She smiled at Hawke, hoping he could see her feelings for him reflected in her eyes.

"So would I, Caitlin. So would I. And, I do know what you mean." Hawke hoped his voice didn't betray his feelings. You're right, Cait. What happened with Sawyer is the past, and it doesn't matter anymore. As far as us moving forward together is concerned, I want that, too. More than I think I've wanted anything my whole life, other than finding Saint John. That's really your decision, though, Cait. I don't want to pressure you either way—and, I won't. I will admit that when you said 'I didn't love him, String. At least, not the way I love you,' it was encouraging.

Well, I guess now's as good a time as any. Caitlin felt her anxiety level rising again. 'Cause I know what String's waiting for me to tell him, and I think he's just as anxious to hear what I have to say as I am about saying it to him, even though I think—I hope—that what I'm gonna say will make him happy. It's not going to get any easier the longer I put it off, though, so here goes. "String, there's something I need to tell you. It's—about what I said yesterday."

Uh-oh, Hawke felt his anxiety level rise, especially when he heard Caitlin's tone of voice. "Okay, Cait," he said, preparing his mind and heart for whatever Caitlin had to say to him. Well, here it comes. As I heard someone say in a movie once, I have a very bad feeling about this. I mean, I know what I hope Cait's going to say, but I don't know if that is what she's going to say, if that makes any sense whatsoever. Like Dom always told Saint John and me, 'Never assume anything, 'cause it just makes an 'ass' out of 'you,' and 'me.' That's the last thing I want right now, to look like an ass in front of Cait. "Go ahead." Hawke felt his heart hammering in his chest; loudly enough that he was sure Caitlin had to be able to hear it.

"You remember yesterday when I said I needed some time to figure out how I felt, right?" Caitlin asked. Hawke nodded, silent, even as he felt his heart sink. "Well, it didn't take near as long as I thought it would. String, I can't deny how I feel about you. I told you before, I have been in love with you practically since the day I saw you in Bogan's jail cell. Maybe that's why I came back here looking for ya, I don't know. And with everything you've done since you found out about the baby—everything you didn't have to do, I might add, especially considering whose baby this is—I swear, I've just fallen even more in love with you than I was before, and more than I've ever loved anybody in my whole life.

"What I mean is that I know my heart, and my heart knows that it belongs to you, Stringfellow Hawke. I think it has ever since I met you, even if it did take you so long to acknowledge it. And, I feel bad about what I said yesterday—I mean, there you were, telling me everything I've wanted to hear from you ever since I met you, and I have to admit that it—it scared me. At first, like I told ya before, I thought you were only saying those things because I'm pregnant, and that's why I said, 'if you're serious.' I mean, I think I was still worried that you were only saying, and doing, all these wonderful things because I'm pregnant, even though you've been telling me the opposite since you found out. I'll be honest—I think another reason I said what I did was that I-I was scared that you were going to hate me for letting Sawyer sleep with me the way I did, and that I'd never again feel as happy as I have lately, ever since you admitted your feelings about me. I mean, these past few weeks have been everything I've dreamed about ever since I met you, and I've wanted this so badly that when it all started happening as fast as it has, it-it kinda scared me, like I said.

"But I know you better than that, String. I've been around you long enough to know that you never say things like that if you don't mean 'em, and that should have told me everything I needed to know about how you feel about me.

"I guess the point to all this rambling and babbling is that I love you, String, and I'm in love with you. I have been ever since I met you, and I always will be, and there's nothing, or nobody, that could change how I feel about you. I–I just hope you can forgive me for that stupid 'if you're serious' comment, someday." Hawke saw the truth of what Caitlin was saying shining in her blue-green eyes, and he felt an enormous sense of relief. I sure hope he can accept what I said, and believe me, Caitlin thought anxiously. Because I doubt I could take it if he told me he didn't believe what I said. She hoped her face didn't reflect the worry she was suddenly feeling. Not to mention the fact that my heart's banging away in my chest like a runaway jackhammer again, she thought. I wouldn't be surprised if String could hear it.

When Hawke heard Caitlin say, "I guess the point to all this rambling and babbling is that I love you, String, And, I'm in love with you," he felt his emotions lighten considerably, and he felt himself relax. "Cait, I've done all these things because I love you, and because I'm in love with you. I'll always be in love with you, and always love you, too. I'm sorry if anything I said frightened you, but I can understand why you felt that way, and why you doubted whether my feelings were real. I promise you, right here and now, that I'm going to spend the rest of our lives trying to make up for scaring you, and for ignoring and fighting my feelings about you for as long as I have." It made perfect sense when I stopped and seriously thought about it, so I can't exactly be upset with Caitlin.

Hawke wasn't surprised to see Caitlin's eyes fill with tears again. They're happy tears, though. At least, I hope they are, he thought. As soon as they finished eating and got up from the table, Hawke took Caitlin into his arms and kissed her passionately and completely. By the time they separated, there was no doubt in Caitlin's mind how Hawke felt about her—and she was certain that she'd left no doubt in Hawke's mind about her feelings for him. She almost told Hawke she wanted to go to the cabin with him, but she decided against it. Besides, if this relationship goes where I think it's going, then I'll be spending most of my time up at the cabin with String, very soon. It's like Meg Ryan said in 'Top Gun,' String. I am 'one hundred percent, prime time, in love with you.' Then, she heard the other patrons around them applauding at the kiss. Well, everybody else seems to have gotten the message, she thought as she felt her face turning red, I just hope that String did. She sighed as Hawke helped her put her coat on and they left the restaurant together.

"String, I think you already knew how much I love you," Caitlin said, "even though I told you that I was unsure about my feelings."

"Well, I'm not that confident," Hawke admitted, "or that conceited, but I sure hoped that you felt that way. Dom always told Saint John and me— 'never assume anything, because it just makes an ass out of you, and me.' And, I didn't want to look like an ass in front of you if I was wrong, even though I know I've looked like an ass in front of you before."

"I understand, String, but in this case, you were doing a whole lot of worrying about nothing. And I'll be honest with you—Daddy taught Erin and me the same thing, and I kinda felt the same way—I mean, I had assumed that you'd run away from me when you found out about what Sawyer did to me and that I was pregnant with his baby, but you didn't. Plus, I was assuming you'd really hate me when you found out that I let Sawyer sleep with me. Instead, you told me you love me and want to help me raise my baby, and you made me the happiest woman on the face of the earth!"

"I'm glad. By the way, Caitlin, about that comment you made–I forgive you. I mean, I can understand why you were thinking I wasn't serious—up until that night, whenever I said things like I said to you, I was being sarcastic or teasing you, and I figured you probably were worried I'd hate you for what happened—I don't, but you didn't know how I felt—so it's okay. And, I apologize for all the times I teased you like that, and I want nothing more than to spend the rest of our lives trying to show you how wrong I was to tease you. As far as what happened between you and Sawyer goes, like you said, it's over and done with, and we can't change it, no matter how much we wish we could, so the best thing we can do is forget about it and move on." Caitlin sighed happily at String's words.

"No, String. What I said to you wasn't okay but thank you. And, by the way, apology accepted," Caitlin replied, smiling up at him as they walked through the parking lot. The fact he forgave me for that stupid comment just proves how much String loves me, Caitlin thought. He wouldn't have done that if he didn't really love me, just the way he says he does. Why in the heck did I ever doubt how he feels about me? I mean, I remember the times String's talking about, when he said he loved me, but he was teasing when he said it, but I can understand why he did it, and I'm sure not gonna hold it against him! "I guess it's like Daddy always told Erin and me— 'Don't operate tongue, unless brain is engaged!' And my brain obviously wasn't engaged when I said—that—to you, String."

"Well, Cait, I've already forgotten about it. It doesn't matter to me anymore, so I don't want you to be upset about it anymore. All right? Besides, if you're worrying about that, it's not good for your baby."

"Okay." Caitlin smiled up at Hawke as he opened the passenger door of the Jeep for her, and he saw her eyes shining with happiness. She gently kissed his cheek, but when she grabbed his hand a moment later, Hawke suddenly got nervous. "Cait? What is it? Something wrong with the baby?" If something is wrong, and it's because she's been worrying about everything, I'll never forgive myself, Hawke thought anxiously.

Caitlin simply smiled and laid Hawke's hand on her belly. "Relax, String. Everything's fine. The baby's kicking, and I–I wanted you to feel it."

Hawke's jaw dropped as he felt the baby moving under his hand. "Wow. Feels like you've got a soccer player, or maybe a field goal kicker in there, Caitlin."

"Yeah. But, at least that means the baby's healthy," she said, smiling at Hawke before she climbed into the Jeep. Hawke closed her door and walked around to the driver's side, and a few minutes later, they were on the way back to the hangar. String's right, she thought as she glanced over at him in the driver's seat, worrying about that stupid comment of mine, and how String would feel about it, won't be good for my baby, so I'm not going to worry about it anymore. Besides, he told me he understood why I said it, and that he forgave me, so that's all there is to it! God, I so don't deserve this man, but I am so happy that String finally accepts that I love him and loves me the same way! Even more, that he doesn't hate me for sleeping with Sawyer, or that I'm carrying his baby!

"Cait," Hawke said as they drove, "I have a confession to make."

Uh-oh. Not so fast, there, Caity girl. "Yes, String?" I sure hope it's nothing serious. Geez, there goes my heart again, banging away like a runaway jackhammer, and stuck in my throat. I just decided I was going to stop worrying about what I said a few minutes ago, but now I'm worried all over again.

"Well, when Sawyer came and took you out that night, I—I was jealous," Hawke said, glancing hesitantly over at her, and relaxing when he saw a smile gracing Caitlin's face. "I remember thinking how beautiful you looked and how happy you looked to be with him—and I wished that I could make you look like that, even though I hadn't figured my feelings out yet. I probably should've said something right there, but I just couldn't, and I–I'm sorry."

Now you tell me! Caitlin felt herself relaxing when she heard what String confessed to her. It makes perfect sense that he apologized for that, though. She knew she should be angry at String's admission, but she also knew that she couldn't be angry about it. Because he hadn't figured out his feelings yet. I'm sure glad it was nothing major, though, she thought."I know, String," Caitlin said as they pulled up to the hangar. "I'll be honest with you—I was wishing like heck that you would've said something and felt real sad when you didn't. I dunno, maybe that's why I fell for Sawyer's BS and let him talk me into sleeping with him—like I told you before, he was telling me everything I wanted to hear—from you—but it's like I said a few minutes ago. We can't go back and change what happened that night. Besides, I told you before that I don't want you blaming yourself for what I did. What's done is done, and we can't change it, no matter how badly we might want to. All we can do now is move forward, together. By the way, apology accepted for all the times you teased me, and for not saying anything that night when Sawyer came to the hangar to pick me up. It's all over, and we're together, just the way I've always wanted us to be." Besides, maybe we wouldn't be together like this, now, if I hadn't fallen for Sawyer's BS and let him sleep with me. So maybe this is what was supposed to happen. It doesn't matter, I guess, but it does make for something interesting to think about.

Then a very funny thought crossed her mind. What String said about how beautiful I looked that night, I hate to admit it, but it sounded like the words to an old George Strait song I love—but that song will never mean the same thing to me again. I think I'll keep that little tidbit to myself, though. Heck, it might come in handy someday. I'm sure glad String doesn't hold anything against me about Sawyer, or that stupid remark of mine. That's just another reason I love him so danged much—and, why I'll always love him, with every bit of my heart and soul.

"Yeah," String said as they stepped out of the Jeep. He didn't waste a moment, sweeping Caitlin into his arms for another passionate kiss. When he separated them, as soon as he felt like he could say something, he said, "You and me, together. You probably won't believe this, Cait, but I really love the sound of that." As he looked at Caitlin, there in his arms, Hawke realized something. She looks even happier and more beautiful right now than she did that night with Sawyer. I hope I never stop putting that look in her eyes. Because when I see Caitlin smile at me like that, all's right in my world. Then Hawke considered what Caitlin had told him about her letting Sawyer talk her into sleeping with him. I figured she let him talk her into it, somehow, he thought sadly, but it's over and done with. Like Caitlin said, even though we wish like hell we could, we can't change what happened. All we can do now is move forward, together, and that's exactly what I'm going to do. And we might not even be together like this if Sawyer hadn't come into the picture, so maybe things were supposed to happen like this. I don't know, and to be perfectly honest, I don't care.

"I'm glad, String." Caitlin smiled up at him, all the love she felt for him shining in her eyes again. "And I do believe you. And I love the way that sounds, too." Caitlin smiled happily, even with the tears in her eyes. You and me, together. That's only what I've wanted since I first laid eyes on you, Stringfellow Hawke! Caitlin thought excitedly. She suddenly felt more relaxed and comfortable, there in Hawke's arms, than she'd felt in a long time. I don't think I ever felt like this before, even the few times Ken held me. It's as though I belong in String's arms, and he belongs in mine. Even with the baby, I can tell that String and I fit together perfectly. It's like—like we're made for each other. Caitlin remembered how it had felt when Hawke kissed her on that movie set two years ago, even though it had been at a director's behest. Even then, I knew we belonged together. Now, it looks like we're going to be, just the way I've always hoped we would be, even though I know I danged sure don't deserve to be with String. Right now, though, in his arms like this, I swear I feel like the luckiest woman on the face of the earth! I just hope I never stop feeling like this! Like I said before, String already has made me happier than I ever thought it was possible to be!

"Do that again." Hawke nodded and pulled Caitlin into another kiss, this one even more intense than the last. He makes my toes curl every time he does that, she thought happily. I never thought it was possible that I could feel this wonderful, or this alive! I hope I feel like this for the rest of our lives! I never understood what Mom meant when she said Daddy was her 'soulmate,' until right now! I swear, I know, now, that String is my soulmate, and I'll never let him go. Ever!

"Oh, by the way, Cait, I do plan on asking you to marry me, very soon."

"String, when you do, I already know what my answer's going to be. Of course, I'll marry you! I have wanted to be your wife practically since the day I met you."

"You will be, Cait. I promise you that. I have something else to tell you, too—Dom asked me if I was the father of your baby when I first told him that you were pregnant. But I told him that was impossible, since we never slept together."

"That's funny, String." I can guarantee you'll be the father of the next one, though, Caitlin thought excitedly. 'Cause now that I know how you feel about me, and that you're going to marry me and help me raise my baby, I don't want it to be an only child. I want this little boy or girl to be a big brother or sister someday, she thought excitedly. And I know that from now on, you'll be the only man I ever sleep with, String.

"And I know you've been worried about what I thought of what happened, but I want you to know something, Caitlin. What happened between you and Sawyer doesn't change how much I love you. Nothing could ever change that. I will always be here for you, and I will always love you, Caitlin."

"String, I needed to hear that so much. Thank you for being who you are, and for loving me, despite everything that happened." She reluctantly moved closer in Hawke's arms, and was surprised, but elated, when he pulled her the rest of the way to him and kissed her passionately once again. There they go again, she thought as her toes curled inside her shoes. God, I hope String never stops making me feel like this!

Finally, even though she didn't want String to let her go, she reluctantly eased out of his arms, so she could go home. Caitlin noticed that String didn't let go of her completely until he absolutely had to, just before she climbed into her car to go home. Now I know what true love feels like. Caitlin sighed happily as she got ready to go to sleep that night. I can't remember the last time I felt this much in love. Nobody has ever made me feel the way String did tonight. Not Ken, not Robert—nobody. With them, I was just a means to an end, even though I was naive and gullible enough to believe that Ken really loved me. With String, though, I know it's different. It's love. The kind I always hoped that I'd find, and the kind Daddy always wanted me to find, like what he had with Mom, or like what I've heard String's parents had. I never should have doubted how String feels about me, 'cause he's proven how he feels ever since he found out about my baby.

As she lay in her bed trying to calm herself down, so she could fall asleep, Caitlin felt herself remembering how she'd thought Hawke would never want anything to do with her once she told him about Sawyer. Boy, do I see how wrong I was! Guess it's like what Daddy used to tell Erin and me—the same thing String said Dom told both him and Saint John— 'never assume anything, 'cause it just makes an ass out of you, and me.' In this case, though, I don't mind. I don't mind one bit. She smiled as she thought about everything Hawke had done for her since he found out about the baby, and who its father was.

He didn't have to do any of the things he's done since he found out—the way he's been helping me, not letting me do too much and chance hurting the baby, or the way he's been looking out for me even more than usual. For example, buying me breakfast or lunch—or both—almost every day, not to mention not complaining when I've told him I needed a snack and sent him on a run for pickles and ice cream, or chips, or whatever weird stuff I got a craving for. Not to mention those awesome back rubs he's been giving me, plus taking me out to dinner when we've closed the hangar, not to mention sending those beautiful roses today—but, he did 'em anyway, without me even having to say anything—and he did them all because he loves me.

Even more important than everything String's doing for me, is everything he hasn't done since he found out. String hasn't judged me, or said he hated me for sleeping with Sawyer. Even though I did it, String still loves me, and wants to be with me to help me raise my baby. Most important of all, String didn't put an ounce of pressure on me when I told him I needed to make up my mind. He stepped back and gave me the time I needed—and I think that's why I didn't need that much time, if that makes one lick of sense. Well, that and the fact that I've loved String like crazy since the day I saw him in that jail cell back in Pope County. He was right, though—it wasn't his business that I slept with Sawyer, but I know now that I'll never sleep with anybody but Stringfellow Hawke, ever again. String and I belong together. And very soon, now, we will be. Then, she remembered something Dom had told her when she came back to the hangar– 'everything's going to work out. You'll see.'

Boy, I guess it worked out! Just the way I wanted it to, even though I was almost convinced it wouldn't work out that way, Caitlin thought excitedly. Forget 'almost.' I was convinced it wouldn't work out like this, but I was so wrong! String wants to raise my baby with me, as my husband, just the way I hoped and prayed that he would. She felt a happy tear in her eye as she fell asleep, dreaming of the day String would be lying next to her as her husband. I can't wait to feel his arms around me every night, just the way I did tonight. I can't believe it, but 'slim' didn't walk out the door after all! She sighed again as she fell asleep and pictured her wedding day to Hawke. As she fell asleep, Hawke's smiling face came to the front of her thoughts again. I wonder if he really knows how much I love it when he smiles at me, she thought happily. I'll just have to show him, if he doesn't.

Then, something she'd said earlier rang in her head— 'I'm the one who fell head-over-heels in love with Sawyer…' Oh, God in Heaven, not again! Caitlin thought, suddenly worried. Forget worried. Now, I'm terrified, knowing that I'll have to explain another dumb comment to String. I-I don't know why I said that, because I wasn't in love with Sawyer! I mean, I loved him, yeah—or at least, I thought I loved him, until his goons kidnapped me, and I realized that I was nothing to him but a bargaining chip so Sawyer could use Airwolf—but I wasn't in love with Sawyer, the way I'm in love with String. God, why do I say stupid things like that? I-I'll have to explain what I meant to String, soon, and hope like heck that he can forgive me for another stupid comment. Now I know what Daddy meant when he told me not to go sticking my foot in my mouth. Forget my foot—I feel like I stuck my whole leg in my mouth this time, and I need a crane to pull it back out again!

Finally, a few months later, Hawke decided it was time. He called Michael and asked him to get in touch with Judge Clevenger. When Michael asked why, Hawke said, "I just want to make some arrangements, with the baby coming soon and all."

"Aha," Michael had said. "And I don't think I need to ask what sort of 'arrangements' you're thinking of, do I?" Michael wondered if Hawke could hear the smile in his voice. Looks like I'll have to have Marella call Ron again. Damn, I was hoping you would see sense, Hawke, and it looks like you did!

"No, Michael, you don't," Hawke replied, even as he wondered whether Michael could hear the smile in his voice, the way he heard the smile in Michael's. "But, that reminds me, I need one other favor. If Cait says 'yes,' then would you stand as—?"

"Hawke, it would be my honor," Michael replied. Especially since Saint John's not here. I don't think you'll have to worry about Caitlin saying 'yes,' either, Hawke. I've had my suspicions about how Caitlin felt about you ever since we had lunch in that cafe after you rescued me. Every time Dom or I mentioned your name, I saw Cait's eyes light up. And, you don't even know this, but I heard Caitlin say "I care about him, too, y'know. Probably more than you know," when she and Dom were talking about rescuing you from Horn. And I know Caitlin didn't mean she cared about you as just a friend, even though I know she cares about you that way. Moreover, I saw the way she kissed you after she got off the ship—that made it obvious how Cait felt about you. I'm just relieved you've finally admitted how you feel about her, before we lost her for good. I just wonder if the smile in my voice was as obvious to you as the smile in yours was to me, Hawke. I can already tell Caitlin is having a good effect on you.

Smiling, he buzzed Marella and asked her to call Judge Clevenger again. When Judge Clevenger answered the phone, Michael said, "Ron, hi. It's Michael again, and I need another favor. When would you be able to schedule a wedding?" Michael listened to Ron for a few minutes, then said, "Yes, Ron. My hunch from before was right—Caitlin is the one who was pregnant, and just like I thought, Ken Sawyer was the father. Hawke's going to ask her to marry him, soon, though, so as far as the world knows, he'll be the father of Caitlin's baby. And I agree, it is about time," Michael said, smiling as he pictured Caitlin's expression the night of Ron's retirement party from the FIRM's legal team. "All right, I'll let Hawke know, and thanks again, Ron. For everything," Michael said before he hung up.

Once Michael had set things up with Ron, he contacted Hawke and advised him when Ron would be able to marry them. A few days beforehand, Hawke proposed to Caitlin, and even though she'd told him what she would say, Hawke still felt a bundle of nerves in his stomach when he got down on one knee in front of her at the hangar and popped the question. True to her word, though, Caitlin smiled and said, "God, yes! Of course, I'll marry you, String!" When Hawke slipped the engagement ring onto the third finger of her left hand, Caitlin felt tears flood her eyes as Hawke stood up, pulled her into his arms, and kissed her. Once they caught their breath, Caitlin commented, "String, I can't believe it, but this ring fits perfectly. Not to mention, it's gorgeous! Where did you get it, so quick?"

"Cait, this was my mother's ring," Hawke said. "When the wills were read, Mom had written a special codicil that stated that if she died before either Saint John or I got married, we should give the ring to our intended. Which means that it's yours now, Cait. And," he added, noticing Caitlin's expression, "I think Mom would be very happy, and proud, if she could see you wearing her ring."

"String, no. I–I can't wear this ring," Caitlin stammered. "It belonged to your mother, for heaven's sake!" Besides, there's still the matter of that other stupid comment I made a few months ago. I mean, String forgave me the first time, but I dunno if he'll do it again. She started to remove the ring, but Hawke gently took her right hand in his, stopping her.

"And now, it belongs to you, Caitlin," Hawke insisted. "This is what Mom wanted—for Saint John or me to give her ring to the woman we love."

"Cait, I was there when the codicil was read, and everything String told you is true," Dom said. "And he's right—Jane would be very proud, and happy, if she could see you wearing that ring. And since she was my best friend's wife, and we spent a lot of time together both here and at the cabin, I think I knew her well enough that I can also safely say that she'd be very disappointed if you didn't wear it." That would not be a pleasant experience for you, Caitlin, Dom thought. If you ever wondered where String gets that temper of his, it's from Jane, no question about it.

"Well, all right." Caitlin said, wiping tears out of her eyes as she glanced at her ring again. "It is beautiful. I would have hated to give it up, especially since that's what your mom wanted."

"Then, don't." Hawke said, smiling at her.

"I won't. I promise." The smile on Caitlin's face was all the proof Hawke needed. "Besides, the fact that it fits so perfectly is just more proof that we belong together, String!" Like I don't have enough proof of that already, she thought. The fact that his mother's ring fits my finger so perfectly is just the icing on the cake. I swear, that ring looks like it belongs on my finger. But I'm still worried about what String's gonna say about that comment I made a few months ago, since I haven't had the guts to bring it up.

"I think you're right, Cait," Hawke said, smiling at her. "And we will be together, real soon. You, me, and your baby."

"Yeah. You, my baby, and me. Together. Just the way I've always wanted us to be, practically since the day I met you, String," Caitlin said, smiling, as she reached for Hawke and kissed him again. When they separated, Hawke smiled at Dom and said, "Sorry about that."

"Aw, heck, it's okay, kid. You two are in love, and you're getting married, so why wouldn't you kiss each other around me? Your folks used to do that all the time, even here at the hangar, y'know!"

"Yeah, Dom, I know," Hawke said, recalling hearing stories about that from Dom, and his parents, when he and Saint John were boys. Not to mention, I saw it more than once, Hawke thought, smiling at the memory.

"I'll tell you the truth, String—it's been a long time since I saw two people as happy, and as in love, as you and Cait, so don't worry about embarrassing me! If anything, I'm just really happy you two have finally acknowledged the obvious—how you feel about each other!" Dom smiled as he remembered what he'd thought about doing the day Hawke told him about the pregnancy. Guess we won't need the Lady after all. But, God, I'm glad String finally pulled his head outta his behind about Caitlin! Alan and Jane, I sure hope you can see what's going on right now! 'Cause if you can, I'll bet you'd be really happy, and awfully proud of String!

"So are we, Dom," Caitlin replied.

"Cait, you took the words right out of my mouth," Hawke said, grinning.

"String? I—I hate to tell you this, but, Ken said something real interesting to me before, well, you know. And, with everything that's happened, I—I've been thinking a lot about it."

"Really? What would that bastard have said that you'd still be thinking about, Caitlin?" Hawke hoped Caitlin could hear the disgust in his voice.

"He told me, 'The more you're willing to risk, the greater the reward.' And, I've gotta agree with the sentiment, even if I don't agree with who said it. I mean, I know I was risking just about everything, telling you about what Sawyer did to me, and the fact that I'm carrying his baby, but the reward—you—has been better than anything I could ever imagine." Caitlin searched Hawke's face for a reaction and was relieved when she saw him smile lovingly at her.

"Well, as much as I hate to agree with him, I guess I have to admit that Sawyer was right," Hawke agreed. "I mean, I know how much you were risking, Caitlin, and I was risking just as much. But, the reward—falling in love with you—has been the greatest thing that's ever happened to me."

"Well, don't worry, String. I promise, that'll be the last time I bring him up."

"Good." Hawke smiled at Caitlin before he kissed her again.

"Y'know, Cait," Hawke said a few hours later when they were having lunch together, "I have another little confession to make. I—I've always felt like you deserved better than me, and like you'd never settle for somebody like me."

"Excuse me? What did you say you felt like? Like I'd never 'settle for somebody' like you? Stringfellow Hawke, I cannot believe you just said that! You think there's someone 'better' out there for me, than you? Let me tell you something right now! You are without a doubt the most loving, honorable, charming, not to mention the sexiest man I've ever known! Any woman would be proud to be your wife! I'm just glad I get to be that woman." Caitlin smiled at Hawke and was relieved when he smiled back at her.

"Thank you, Caitlin. Even though I don't believe most of what you just said, thank you, very much, and I apologize for that comment. I didn't think before I said it, and I'm sorry."

"Now you know how I feel when you start talking about how I'm the 'sexiest, most charming, most beautiful, and most loving woman' you've ever known, String, especially when I compare myself with some of the women you've dated since I've known you! Oh, and apology accepted. I'll make you a deal, though—if you'll believe what I just told you, then I'll believe all the wonderful things you say about me. Deal?"

"Deal." Hawke smiled happily and kissed Caitlin to seal their agreement.

"Trust me on this, String—the next time you and I go to one of Michael's stuffy old FIRM parties, when we walk in arm-in-arm, and I hear you introduce me as your wife, I'll be the proudest, happiest woman on the face of this earth! Just the same way I am right now!" I meant it when I said String is the sexiest man I've ever known, she thought happily. Heck, if Dom wasn't here, I'd say let's lock that door, close the windows, and make love right here in the office, on the couch! Maybe in the old Stearman, too—I think it's big enough to hold us, and I know Dom keeps a tarp in there, and we could cover up with it. Not to mention there's the storage closet, and that cot Dom keeps in there—we could set that up back in the corner of the office, or someplace else. There are so many places around here we can use. Of course, if Dom ever caught us, he'd probably have a heart attack. Now that I think about it, though, she thought, smiling, if we did something like that and Dom caught us, at least he'd die happy, knowing that String and I are finally together! At least, I hope we're still together, after I apologize for yet another stupid comment, she thought anxiously.

"I believe you, Cait," Hawke said, smiling as he kissed her again, but something seemed different. Something's wrong, and I need to know what, he thought as he separated them. "Caitlin. What's the matter? You seem upset about something." Which seems awfully strange, since just a minute ago you said you were the happiest woman on the face of this earth. "In fact, you've seemed upset about something for a long time, now. So, talk to me, Caitlin. What's wrong? Hopefully nothing I've done." I don't think it's anything I've done, but then again, like Dom always told Sinj and me, 'never assume anything, 'cause it just makes an 'ass' out of 'you', and 'me.' And, I've looked like an ass often enough around Caitlin, recently, Hawke thought, suddenly worried.

Well, here we go...again, she thought nervously. "No, it's nothing about you, believe me. String, do you remember when I said, 'I'm the one who fell head-over-heels in love with Sawyer' a while back? Well, I-I wanted to tell you, that was a mistake, me saying that I fell in love with him. I mean, I loved him, yeah—or at least, I thought I loved him, until he kidnapped me—butI wasn't in love with him—and trust me, after the last few months with you, String, I do know the difference! Anyway, I-I just thought you should know that. But," she added, sighing as she reached for her engagement ring to slip it off her finger, "if you want this back, after that stupid comment I made, I-I'll understand."

Hawke smiled as he reached out and placed one hand over Caitlin's, stopping her from removing the ring. "Thanks for telling me that, Cait. Ever since I heard you say that, I've been wondering what you meant. I was hoping you made a mistake when you said that, especially when you said, 'I didn't love him, String. At least, not the way I love you.' That kinda confused me, y'know?"

"Yeah, I know. But the truth is, String, I never loved Sawyer, even though I know how much it looked like I did. Was I hypnotized by the line of BS he fed me? Yeah, I was. Was I infatuated with him? Definitely. But as to being in love with him, I was never in love with him, String. And besides, whatever infatuation I felt disappeared the minute those guys grabbed me out of the helicopter and threw me in that van, and especially after Sawyer told me that what we did 'didn't mean a thing.' When I said that, I think I was still nervous about everything that you'd told me that night, and I let my big, stupid mouth run away with me again. I just hope you can forgive me for it, someday. Just keep something in mind, String—I'm in love with you, and only you. Always have been, and always will be." She smiled at him again, another mind-blowing, 'million-dollar smile' that melted Hawke's heart. Heck, I should have said, 'I'm the one who started following Sawyer around like a little lost puppy,' or 'I'm the one who fell head-over-heels for the lies Sawyer was telling,' or something like that. 'Cause that would have been more right, rather than saying I was in love with him, which I definitely wasn't. God in Heaven, why do I say things like that? She hesitantly glanced at String and was relieved when he smiled warmly at her. I guess it's like Daddy used to tell Erin and me— 'Don't operate tongue, unless brain is engaged.' I-I just hope String can forgive me, again.

"I'll remember that, Caitlin. And I'm 'in love with you,' too. Always have been, even though I denied it for so long, and I promise you, I always will be. And as for that comment, I forgive you, just like I did before. It's not like I've never said anything stupid in my life, y'know. But as to wanting that ring back, I don't. Besides, you just promised me that you wouldn't give it up, and we've got Dom as a witness. That ring is yours, Caitlin, and it's a symbol of how much I love you, and how much I want to spend my life with you. And nothing you say, no matter how stupid, can change that." He smiled at her again, all the love he felt for Caitlin shining in his ice-blue eyes. And anyway, it's not like I haven't said some stupid things in my lifetime. Probably the stupidest thing I've ever said was something Caitlin didn't hear, thank goodness. It was when I said, 'Cute? She's a kid!' to Dom that time, he thought, suddenly embarrassed. Because I know, now, that Caitlin is anything but a kid. And of course, there was my 'I—I've always felt like you deserved better than me, and like you'd never settle for somebody like me' comment a few minutes ago. That was really stupid. Or when I told Sawyer, 'that girl had better be all right!' Of course, I was trying to make sure he wouldn't figure out how I felt about Caitlin.

"Thanks for being so understanding, String." Like I said before, I do not deserve this man! Caitlin thought excitedly, but I am so happy that I've got him, and that he forgave me, again, for letting my big, stupid mouth run away with me! Heck, after the past few months with String, now I realize I haven't been 'in love with' anybody, except for String! Nobody makes me feel the way he does!

"You're welcome, Caitlin." Hawke smiled at her before he kissed her again. "Besides," he said a few moments later, "like I said a minute ago, it's not like I've never said anything stupid in my life."

"You? Saying something stupid? I find that hard to believe, String! When have you ever said anything stupid?"

"Well, probably the stupidest thing I ever said was right after Dom and I left you in Texas," Hawke said hesitantly. "Dom said, 'She was kinda cute, huh, String?' And I replied, 'Cute? She's a kid!' But, trust me on this, Caitlin, I know that you're anything but a kid. I-I think I was just trying to stop Dom from trying to get us together."

"That makes sense, String," Caitlin said, causing him to sigh with relief. "And heck, I was a kid when you met me back in Texas, so I understand why you said it. Just"—

"Don't worry, Caitlin," Hawke said, smiling, "I'll never say something like that about you again." Especially since I know if I ever did, you'd kick my ass all the way back to the cabin. And I'd deserve it, too, he thought. Not to mention the comment I made a few minutes ago, like I thought before. But I'm sure as heck not gonna bring that up again.

"That's all I wanted to hear. You're forgiven, String." Caitlin sighed happily as they walked out of the office.

"Thanks."

"Y'know, String, there's something else I've been meaning to tell you, about both those stupid comments of mine. I think I made them both because, well, I was still having a hard time believing that you'd admitted that you were in love with me. Not to mention the fact that my hormones were totally outta whack and pulling my brain in about a billion different directions. But, String, have you ever wanted something so badly, that you had a hard time believing when you actually got it?"

"Yeah, I have, Caitlin, and I understand what you mean. It's okay."

Later, Hawke said, "About those other women, Caitlin—I want you to understand that they were just—temporary distractions."

"Even Gabrielle?"

"Gabrielle was the woman I thought I wanted, before I met you, and I realized who I really want. I think I realize, now, that she and I were too much alike. Even though I didn't want to admit it to myself back then, I needed somebody different—somebody more like you, Caitlin."

"Thank you, String. I—I really needed to hear that."

"You do believe me, don't you?" Hawke asked, just as Caitlin captured his lips with hers in a searing kiss. When she separated them a few moments later, once she thought she could complete a full sentence, she said, "Does that answer your question?" I thought Sawyer and Villars were good-looking, but neither of them has anything on Stringfellow Hawke! I swear I can get lost in those gorgeous eyes of his! Thank heaven it won't be long until those eyes, and the rest of Stringfellow Hawke, are mine forever! Caitlin hoped her face wasn't flushing as she felt a rush of hormones through her body. Not to mention those kisses he gives me. I swear, every time he kisses me, my toes curl. And I hope they do that for the rest of our lives!

"Yeah, Cait. It does." Hawke smiled at Caitlin, seeing all the love she felt for him shining in her hazel eyes, and knowing his love for her was reflecting in his blue eyes. She has the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen, Hawke thought. Like I told her, I know, now, that Caitlin O'Shannessy is the most beautiful woman I've ever known. I don't know why I ever thought she was a kid, or that she was just 'cute.' Hawke stifled a smile when he recalled saying, 'Cute? She's a kid!' to Dom, aboard Airwolf, as they left Pope County. After Dom said, 'She was, kinda cute, huh, String?' I mean, I blew Dom off back then because I was so paranoid about the curse and all that, not to mention, like I told Caitlin, I was worried Dom was gonna try and get us together. But even then, I knew that was a dumb thing to say. Because even though I didn't want to admit it, even then I knew that Caitlin O'Shannessy is a very beautiful, very sexy, woman.

"I mean, String, you know I've met some real jerks—okay, some real assholes—in my life, especially since I've been here in California, and thought I loved all of them, but thanks to you, now that I know what real love feels like, I know I was just infatuated with all of those guys. With you, though, I know it's the real deal. This is the kind of love that my parents had—and I know it's forever." The biggest asshole, of course, was Sawyer. But I'm not gonna think about him anymore, especially knowing that I'm gonna get everything I want—namely, that String and I are going to be together, forever!

"Yeah, Cait. It's forever. And I'll tell you exactly that on our wedding day." Hawke smiled as he kissed her again. When he separated them, Hawke glanced down at Caitlin's hands and smiled. "Y'know, Cait, Mom's ring looks like it belongs there on your hand. Maybe you were supposed to have it all along." And I can tell already that we're going to have the same kind of love that Mom and Dad had, or like what Cait's told me her parents had. When we say, 'till death do us part,' the day we get married, we'll both mean it.

Caitlin smiled as she glanced at her left hand. "You might be right, String. No, wait, you are right. I thought the same thing when you slipped it on my finger, and that just proved that you and I belong together—as if I didn't feel that way already! And I have to tell you something—you already have made me happier than I ever thought I could possibly be, so I can't wait to see what the rest of our lives brings!"

"I feel the same way, Caitlin. Falling in love with you has been the greatest feeling in the world, and it has made me happier than I ever thought I could be. And I can't wait to see what the rest of our lives brings, either. I'll be honest—I should have admitted how I feel about you a long time ago." He smiled and stood up, pulling Caitlin out of her chair a moment later and wrapping his arms around her waist, as she slipped hers around his shoulders.

"String, shut up and"—Caitlin suddenly felt Hawke's lips against hers again in a searingly passionate kiss. M mm. That's better, she thought as she tightened her arms around Hawke. And there they go again, she thought as she felt her toes curling inside her shoes. God, I hope String never stops making my toes curl when he kisses me!

"This is really happening, isn't it?" Caitlin asked a few moments later, when she'd caught her breath. "You're really gonna marry me, even after what I did, and those stupid things I've said?"

"Yes, Caitlin. It's all really happening. I've finally admitted how I feel about you, and I'm going to marry you, and be your baby's father, even knowing everything that happened." Hawke smiled at Caitlin and was not surprised to see tears in her eyes again.

"You don't know how much that means to me, hearing you say that, String." Caitlin reached out and pulled Hawke closer to her again, kissing him for all she was worth.

"You know, String," Caitlin said later that day, just before she went home, "I can't understand why you did all these wonderful things for me, especially considering whose baby I'm carrying. But, I wanted to tell you—again—how much I appreciate everything you've done."

"Cait, I'll tell you the same thing every day for the rest of our lives, if I have to—I've done all these things because I love you. And I don't care whose baby this is—or was, since he's dead," he said, placing one hand on her swollen belly, "because you and I are going to raise this baby, together. And, I've been thinking about something—between meeting you in Texas, and then you coming back here looking for me, I-I think it's fate. I think it was fate that we met in Texas, and then it was fate that brought you here, looking for me."

God, I love this man! I don't deserve him, especially after what happened, but I love him! "Thanks, String," Caitlin said, smiling through tears in her eyes. She pulled Hawke's head down to her for one last kiss before she went home. String might be right, about us meeting being fate, she thought as she fell asleep that night.

Hawke and Caitlin were married a few weeks later, with Michael standing as Hawke's best man, and Marella standing with Caitlin as her maid of honor. "After all," Caitlin had said when she asked Marella about it, "Since my family doesn't know about the baby, I kinda don't want to tell them about it. At least, not yet. And, String and I do consider you and Michael to be friends, you know."

"Thank you, Caitlin," Marella had told her. "We appreciate that, and we consider you and Hawke both friends, you know that. And, just like Michael told Hawke, it will be an honor, and a pleasure, to stand with you when you and Hawke get married."

"Yeah, I do know that," Caitlin said. "And I—that is, we—appreciate it. And, thanks." Caitlin smiled at Marella and was happy to see her smile back.

"Don't mention it."

After the ceremony, Hawke and Judge Clevenger talked.

"Hawke," Judge Clevenger said, "I know you're aware that Michael told me about the situation you and Caitlin are in and let me just say that I hope you didn't marry Caitlin because of her baby."

"No, Your Honor," Hawke replied. "I love Caitlin very much—I think I've loved her ever since I met her. I'm just embarrassed that it took this whole thing with the baby to get me to acknowledge it." He stifled a smile as he recalled Caitlin voicing her concern that Hawke was only marrying her because of her baby.

"I'm certainly glad to hear that. But now that I think about it, Hawke, I remember when you and Caitlin came to my retirement party from the FIRM's legal team—when I saw the two of you walk into the ballroom, I don't think I'd ever seen anyone look more in love than Caitlin did that night—at least, until today. Because today, I saw you looking just as in love with Cait as she does with you. Congratulations, Hawke," Judge Clevenger said, smiling at him.

"Thank you, Your Honor," Hawke replied. He smiled when he recalled Marella telling him almost the same thing. Michael even told me not long ago that Marella was wondering why I couldn't see how Caitlin felt about me. Well, Hawke thought, glancing at Caitlin as she talked with Michael and Marella, I guess I finally saw it.

"By the way, Hawke, there's something you should know. Sawyer didn't have any family around, so there's no one to sue you for custody of Caitlin's baby."

"That's certainly good to know, Your Honor, and thank you again." Hawke smiled and sighed with relief. That's a load off my mind, he thought, and it will be off Caitlin's, too.

As Hawke walked over to rejoin his bride, he overheard her saying, "Michael, thank you so much for what you did today, along with everything you've done since you found out about my situation. String and I will never be able to"—

"Stop right there, Cait," Michael said, grinning at her. "I'm afraid that I have to confess to having a slightly selfish reason for stepping in and arranging all this, aside from my selfish reason of worrying that the Airwolf crew would lose a valuable member." Michael noticed Caitlin's reaction and smiled. "Yes, Caitlin, even though I was upset that day when you announced that you could fly Airwolf, I realize that if Hawke and Dom hadn't taught you how to run the engineering console, I probably never would have gotten out of East Germany. I owe you my life for that, Caitlin. Not to mention the fact that if it hadn't been for you, Horn would have taken possession of Airwolf permanently, and the fact that you know how to fly her has been a benefit on several other occasions. You have become a very valuable part of the crew, and I didn't want to lose you.

"As to the main, and in all honesty, the real reason I was happy to step in and help, I've noticed that since Hawke pulled his head out of his rear end about you, he seems a lot happier, and when he's happier, he's a lot more pleasant, and easier to deal with. Zeus even mentioned that to me just the other day. So, you just keep Hawke smiling for us, and that's all the repayment I need."

"That's a promise." Caitlin smiled at Michael, then up at Hawke again. Besides, as good-looking, and sexy as I already think he is, when he smiles like that, it just makes him even sexier, she thought. "And, thank you, Michael."

"Don't mention it, Caitlin," Michael replied.

"Thank you, Michael," Hawke replied. "And, you're right. Now that I've finally admitted my feelings about Cait, I am happier."

"So I noticed." Michael said, grinning at the newlyweds. "Like Bobby said, Hawke, you look good when you smile! And I certainly hope I never stop seeing that smile, even if it does take a while for me to get used to the idea of you smiling!" Hawke nodded at Michael, knowing what he said was the truth.

"If I've got anything to say about it, Michael, you won't." Caitlin promised him. 'Cause now that you're mine, String, I'm never letting you go. Ever. When I said 'til death do us part' a few minutes ago, I meant it. I'm planning to live a very happy and long life with you, Stringfellow Hawke. "And, you're right. He does look good when he smiles, just like Bobby said," Caitlin added, smiling suggestively up at Hawke. Even better than usual, if that's humanly possible, she thought, trying to control the flood of hormones she suddenly felt rush through her body.

"I'm glad to hear it, and, before I forget, congratulations again." Michael smiled at Hawke and Caitlin again as he, Marella, and Judge Clevenger got ready to leave.

"Thank you, Michael. For everything," Hawke replied, smiling at Michael.

Just before he flew back to the hangar, Dom winked at Caitlin. "I told you things would work out, Cait. And, congratulations."

"Yeah, you did, but I never thought they'd work out like this! Thanks, Dom," Caitlin said, beaming, as she glanced up at String.

"Yeah, thanks, Dom." Hawke said.

"And, just like I told your parents at their wedding, String, I wish the both of you 'Godspeed and good tailwinds.' String smiled at the mention of the old pilot's prayer that Dom often quoted. He and Caitlin both embraced Dom, and he climbed back into his helicopter to head back to the hangar. As Dom flew back, he thought, String's finally admitted how he feels about Cait, and now, those two are going to be together forever. I had a feeling about those two when I heard that Caitlin had come back to California looking for String, and then when she said 'I care about him, too, y'know. Probably more than you know,' that day in Michael's limo. I'm just glad String finally acknowledged the obvious! I just hope I get to be around long enough to see their first child together—maybe a little girl with String's eyes, and Cait's red hair. That'd be just perfect. Dom landed at the hangar with a lightness in his heart he hadn't felt in a very long time, knowing that String was finally, truly, happy.

A few moments later, Michael, Dom, Marella and Judge Clevenger had all returned to the hangar, leaving Hawke and Caitlin alone at the cabin, and Hawke wasted little time in showing Caitlin just how much he loved her, and how happy he was that they were finally together. Knowing the baby was due soon, Hawke made sure to be extra careful and gentle, even though Caitlin assured him that lovemaking with her new husband while she was pregnant was safe for both her and her baby. And there is a difference, Caitlin thought excitedly when it was over. What Sawyer did to me was just—sex. And it wasn't even good sex, she thought with a quiet giggle. Now, what String and I just did, that was what I thought making love felt like. It's just a shame that we won't be able to do it again for a while, after the baby comes. On the other hand, that gives us both something to look forward to! As they fell asleep that night, Caitlin felt her husband's arms around her body, and she knew String was taking care not to put any pressure on the baby. Just the way I'd hoped. Even though Mom and Erin weren't here, everything that happened today was just the way I'd hoped and dreamed it'd be if I ever got married. But heck, I would've been happy if we'd just flown to Vegas and eloped—that's how much I love String—but I loved that he and Michael worked together and set that little ceremony up today. I mean, I never needed a big brouhaha of a wedding like Erin had. I've got everything I need right here—String and my baby, who I'll be seeing soon. But right now, in String's arms, I swear I'm the happiest woman on the face of this Earth! Because String's finally mine, just like I'm his. For now, and for always. You were right, String. Meeting you that day in Pope County was fate, and so was my coming back here to you. Thank you so much, String, for making me your wife. Caitlin felt a happy tear in her eye as they fell asleep together for the first time as husband and wife.

Three Months Later, at Kensington General Hospital...

"Goddammit, Hawke!" Caitlin screamed as another contraction hit her. "Don't you even think about touching me again, do you hear me?" Knowing there was nothing he could do to help, and not wanting to aggravate her further, Hawke simply nodded and squeezed Caitlin's hand, trying to help her through the pain of the latest contraction. Finally, just about the time Caitlin felt as if she might pass out from the pain, she heard the small cry of her child.

"Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Hawke," Dr. Robertson said. "It's a girl." Hawke smiled as he cut the umbilical cord and handed Caitlin her daughter. "Cait, looks like you were wrong about Hawke," Dr. Robertson said, smiling at her, then at Hawke.

"Yeah. You were right, Doctor, and I was wrong." Caitlin sighed as she took her daughter from Hawke, smiling at him, then at her child. I've never been happier to be wrong about anything in my whole life, she thought happily. Even though I didn't want to celebrate the day you told me I was pregnant, Doc, I feel like celebrating today! I never thought I could be as happy as I feel right at this moment! She glanced down at the small, pink bundle in her arms. So, you're the one who's been kicking me these past few weeks, she thought happily. Caitlin stifled a smile as she recalled something else she'd thought the day Dr. Robertson confirmed that she was pregnant. I didn't think this would happen, but I feel like I'm absolutely walking on air right now, being married to String, and holding my daughter like this! I can only imagine what it'll feel like when we're here having our first child together! I mean, I know what I said, but that was mainly because it hurt so danged much. But I know I don't want this little girl to be an only child! But that's something to think about in a few months, I guess. Right now, though, I just want to enjoy this moment for as long as I possibly can.

As Caitlin glanced at her child, she settled something that had been on her mind since she and String got married. This isn't 'my' daughter. She's our daughter, even though String's not her biological father. He's been there for Saoirse, and for me, ever since he found out I was pregnant, and he and I are gonna raise her together, so dang it, I'll never think of her as anything but 'our' daughter from now on, and I'm gonna tell String the same doggone thing! I know one thing—I do not want Saoirse to find out about the rat bastard that got me pregnant, and she's not going to find out about him, if I've got anything to say about it!

"Well, first, congratulations on your wedding. You and Hawke make a lovely couple, Caitlin. And your daughter makes you a beautiful family." Dr. Robertson smiled at Caitlin as she held her daughter.

"Thank you, Doctor," Hawke said, surprised.

"Yeah, Thanks, Doctor," Caitlin replied.

"She's—she's beautiful, Cait," Hawke said, saddened for just a moment by the thought that this little child was not a creation of the love between Caitlin and himself. That's okay, though. We'll make sure she's not an only child as soon as we can start trying. If I know Cait, I'd bet she doesn't want her daughter growing up an only child, and in all honesty, neither do I. I mean, I know what she said, but I'm sure that was just the labor pains talking. At least, I hope it was. I mean, Dom told me what Mom said to him, and my dad, when Saint John was born, and yet, they still had me, so I won't be surprised if we decide to have one of our own, even though I'm going to think of this little girl as mine.

"Have you decided on a name?" Dr. Robertson asked.

"Saoirse," Caitlin replied. "Saoirse Marie Hawke."

"Wait," Dr. Robertson said, puzzled. "Caitlin, you told me the baby's father was dead, but you're giving her Hawke's name? I don't" —Hawke suddenly interrupted her.

"Doctor, the man who got Caitlin pregnant is dead, that's true. But, I'm going to raise this little girl, as her father, and that's all there is to it." Hawke hoped his tone of voice, and the expression on his face, convinced Dr. Robertson that the matter was closed.

"I understand." Dr. Robertson nodded.

"Thank you, Doctor," Hawke said, then added, "and I'm sorry for being rude just now."

"Apology accepted, Mr. Hawke. And, once again, congratulations." Dr. Robertson smiled and took Saoirse Marie away for just a moment, so they could clean, weigh, and measure her.

"That's a beautiful name," Hawke said to his wife, "but how the heck did you pronounce it?"

"Seer-sha," Caitlin replied, smiling at her husband. String must not have been paying attention the first two times I said it, but that's okay. I can sure tell how happy he is, which makes me happy. "It's an old Gaelic name, and it means 'freedom.' And, she is half-Irish, you know. I-I'm sorry I didn't talk with you about it, String, but I didn't know how you felt when I decided on her name. I—I just loved the way it sounds, don't you?"

Just then, the nurse brought Saoirse back and handed her to Hawke. "Mr. Hawke, I think this little girl is missing her daddy," the nurse said, and Hawke politely smiled at her as he took Caitlin's daughter. What the nurse doesn't know won't hurt. Hawke quickly squashed the momentary feeling of anger that rose in him when he considered who Saoirse's real father was. Then, he noticed something—even though Saoirse had been fussing when the nurse brought her over, the minute Hawke took her, she quieted right down and closed her eyes contentedly. She must feel comfortable with me. Hawke smiled as he gazed down at the small, pink bundle in his arms. I couldn't hate this sweet, beautiful little girl, even knowing that bastard Sawyer was the one that got Cait pregnant. And as far as I'm concerned, from this point on, Saoirse is my daughter. I'm sure Caitlin doesn't want Saoirse to know about Sawyer, and I don't blame her. The sooner we can put that bastard out of our lives, the better.

"Yeah, Cait," Hawke said as he held Caitlin's child. "You're right. It's a beautiful name, for a beautiful little girl. And I understand why you didn't talk to me about it first, and it's okay, Caitlin." Hawke smiled as he glanced down at Caitlin's daughter. "Well, Saoirse, welcome to the world. Your mommy and I are sure happy you're here." He smiled at Caitlin, and she felt happy tears well up in her eyes as she watched Hawke with her daughter and marveled at how well she seemed to accept Hawke holding her. Saoirse quieted right down the second String took her from the nurse. That just proves it. String may not be Saoirse's biological father, but what that nurse said was right. Because as far as I'm concerned, String is her daddy, and I couldn't be happier. I mean, he's come with me to all my doctor's appointments, not to mention running for snacks whenever I asked him, even before we were married, and never complained once. It looks like Saoirse's already got him wrapped around her little fingers, too. Caitlin smiled at Hawke and her daughter as she watched them together, and she stifled a chuckle when Saoirse reached up and grabbed one of Hawke's fingers in her tiny hand. Yep. He's already wrapped around her little fingers—literally. She already loves String. Not the same way I do, of course, but she loves him, just the way I knew she would.

I can't believe it. Caitlin felt a surge of happiness and love as she watched Hawke holding her daughter. I never should've doubted how String feels about me—'cause I can see it in how he is with my daughter. Even though she's not his, I can already tell he loves Saoirse just as much as I do, just as if she was his own child. And now, I get why I'm feeling so happy, even though the day I found out I was pregnant, I was so convinced I wouldn't. Caitlin sighed as she watched Hawke, then glanced down at her wedding and engagement rings. It's because I'm married to my best friend, and the love of my life, and we're gonna raise Saoirse, together. That's why I'm so happy today!

"You're right, Cait," Hawke said as he held Saoirse. "Even though she's not mine, I love this little girl like she was my own. And before you ask how I knew what you were thinking, I could see it in your eyes."

"Thanks, String." Caitlin couldn't help but smile again as she watched Hawke holding her daughter. "You don't know how happy that makes me, hearing you say that." I bet you'll be just as happy when I tell you what I'm thinking. I can't believe how calm Saoirse is around String. It's as if she accepts him as her father, even though he isn't. Well, as far as I'm concerned, String is her father, from this point on. I'll never think of him as anything else but her father again.

"Oh, I think I do, Cait." Hawke smiled at Caitlin, then directed his smile down at her child. I can see your happiness in your eyes, Cait. That makes me happy. Happier than I've been in a very long time, and happier than I ever thought it was possible for me to be.

"So, how're you doing there, Daddy?" Caitlin grinned as she watched her husband with her daughter. She loves String already. Just like I knew she would.

She must've heard the nurse say that. Hawke quickly glanced around to make sure they were alone. "Caitlin, you and I know that I'm not—" Hawke was suddenly interrupted.

"String, I heard what that nurse told you, and I'll tell you something—she didn't make a mistake just now."

"What?" Hawke said, confused.

"When the nurse brought Saoirse back to you and said, 'I think this little girl is missing her daddy.' Even though she was wrong in the literal sense, she didn't make a mistake, and that's why I said what I did. Saoirse may not be yours biologically, String, but in my eyes, you're her daddy, and her father. You always will be, too, so you had better get used to hearing people say it. Not her 'stepfather,' either, String. As far as the rest of the world and I are concerned, you're her father. Period. End of sentence, and end of story. In case you're wondering where that came from, I caught your expression when the nurse told you that Saoirse was missing her daddy. 'Cause like I said before, String, you are the one I think of as Saoirse's father, and daddy, no matter what. You're the only father, and daddy, that Saoirse is ever going to know, String. You and I are going to raise Saoirse, together, and like you said a few minutes ago, that's all there is to it." Caitlin smiled at String and was relieved when String smiled back at her. It wouldn't surprise me if Saoirse's first word is 'Daddy,' and she's looking right into those gorgeous eyes of yours when she says it, String. 'Cause I'm not even going to mention her, sperm donor to her. That's all Sawyer was—a sperm donor—and our daughter doesn't need to know about him, and she won't if String and I have anything to say about it!

"String, do you remember when you said, 'We'll be together soon. You, me, and your baby'? Well, even then, I thought you were wrong."

"What do you mean, I was wrong, Caitlin?"

"You should have said, 'You, me, and our baby, String." Caitlin said, smiling at her husband. "Because like I said, you are the one I think of as Saoirse's father, and daddy. And I'll tell the world the same thing, String. Saoirse is our daughter, not my daughter, no matter how she came into our lives! I mean, do you really think I want our daughter knowing anything about that rat bastard who got me pregnant?"

When Caitlin said, 'You should have said, you, me, and our baby,' Hawke caught his breath. You'll never know how much that means to me, Caitlin. Hawke felt himself fighting tears when Caitlin said, 'you're the only father that Saoirse is ever going to know,' and when she said, 'You are the one I think of as Saoirse's father, and daddy, no matter what.'

"Thanks, Cait," Hawke felt tears come into his eyes at Caitlin's words—'you're the only father Saoirse is ever going to know', and, 'Saoirse is our daughter, not my daughter...' "I—I really appreciate that. And even given the circumstances, I'm proud that you think of her as my daughter," Hawke said, and then added, "I want you to know that I think of her as my daughter, too. And I promise, I'll always think of Saoirse as mine—no matter what."

Caitlin smiled and nodded at her husband as she watched him with her daughter. I mean—our daughter. Caitlin felt herself choking back tears of joy that formed in her eyes when she heard Hawke say, 'I think of her as my daughter, too.' That tears it. I'll never think of Saoirse as anything but our daughter again. Then she recalled something she'd said a few moments ago, when the labor pains she was feeling were at their worst. Uh-oh. I need to tell String I didn't mean that.

"Um, String, I—I hope you didn't take what I said a few minutes ago seriously," Caitlin said hesitantly.

"No, Cait, I didn't," Hawke replied, smiling at his wife. "I mean, I know you've got to heal some and all that, but I also knew that what you said was because of the pain you were in. Heck, my mother said a lot worse things to my dad when Saint John and I were born, or so Dom has told me. You remember when Dom said he figured Saint John would be an only child, with some of the things Mom said when Saint John was born, don't you? Not to mention, some of the things Mom said when I was born were probably why I was their last child. At least, that's the feeling I get from what Dom has told me about it. I just wish I could have done something to help."

"String," Caitlin said, looking deep into his steel-blue eyes, "knowing that you love me, and that you love Saoirse, that's all I need. Okay? And," she added, "I do remember Dom saying that, and now I understand why he said it. So, it's okay." Although it doesn't surprise me that String wished he could do something to help me, she thought. That's just the way he is—and why he's the man I fell in love with and can now call my husband. He's right, about why I said what I did, though. It just hurt so much, and I was so mad—not to mention that I didn't want anybody else to know that String isn't my baby's real father—but seeing Saoirse here with us, now, makes it all worth it! Then, the prayer she said quietly in the hospital the day she found out she was pregnant came into her mind again. God, I know you didn't give me the answer I asked for that day, but now, I know that wasn't the answer I wanted! God, you gave me something I thought I'd never have—String for my husband, and Saoirse's daddy—and I'll never be able to thank you enough for that!

"Okay, Cait," Hawke replied. Then he said, "Y'know, I think she's got your eyes." Which is a good thing. I'd hate to have to look at Cait's—I mean our—daughter and see Sawyer's eyes for the rest of her life.

Caitlin smiled and said, "I think so, too. Don't worry, String. The next one will have your eyes, I'm sure."

"The next one?" Hawke was suddenly interested. Even though I know it's going to make the next few weeks even longer, waiting until the doctor tells us it's okay to make love again. But then again, it'll give me something to look forward to, he thought.

"Well, sure, 'the next one.'" Caitlin smiled suggestively at him. "I mean, I know what I said a few minutes ago, but how's Saoirse going to be a big sister if we don't have another baby, for Pete's sake? You don't think I want Saoirse to be an only child, do ya?"

"No," Hawke said as he handed Caitlin her child, so he could climb into the small bed with her. "I suppose not." One of these days, I'm going to figure out how in the heck she does that. Hawke smiled as he recalled thinking about that very thing only a few moments ago. I have the rest of our lives to figure that out, though. Hawke smiled at Caitlin as he kicked off his shoes, and a short time later, the three of them cuddled together, Hawke staring at Saoirse Marie and pondering the future.

"Y'know, Caitlin, it's funny. When you said you didn't want our daughter to know about, well, him, I was thinking the exact same thing. I don't want Saoirse to find out about that bastard, either. As far as I'm concerned, the sooner he's out of our lives, the better for all of us."

"I agree. So, why are we still talking about him?" Caitlin grinned at her husband. "Besides, we both promised each other we'd stop talking about him a while ago, didn't we?"

"Good point." Hawke smiled back at Caitlin, then they turned their attention to their daughter. Just then, Dr. Robertson came back into the room with Saoirse's birth certificate. After she signed, Caitlin felt tears erupt in her eyes again as String signed in the space marked 'FATHER.'

"Thank you both," Dr. Robertson said, smiling at the couple as she left the room.

"Now, it's official," Hawke said, grinning. "Now, Saoirse, you are my daughter, and nobody can ever change that." Then, Hawke noticed Caitlin's expression. "What's wrong, Caitlin?"

"Nothing's wrong, String. These tears came because of how happy I am to hear you say that Saoirse is your daughter. I was just so overwhelmed when I saw you sign the birth certificate just now, and then what you said to Saoirse. But, String, there is something I need to tell you. You remember when you said you thought that I deserved someone 'better' than you, right? Let me set you straight—there isn't anybody out there better than you! Trust me—I've looked! And up until you admitted how you feel about me, I always seemed to find rats like Villars, or Sawyer." She sighed, glancing down at their daughter. "I suppose you think they were better than you?"

"No, Caitlin, I don't. I-I didn't think when I said that, and I'm sorry about that."

"Thanks, String. I accept your apology. Just promise me you'll never say something like that again."

"I promise, Caitlin. I'll never say anything like that again," Hawke said, hoping the look in his eyes convinced her. "I guess that just proves that I say my fair share of stupid things, huh?"

"Yeah, it does."

"Well, like I said, Caitlin, there's nothing you could say that will ever change how much I love you. Promise me you'll remember that."

"I promise, I'll always remember that, and thanks again, String. I appreciate that. But let me tell you this. Even if there was somebody out there better, which there isn't, I wouldn't have been able to turn off my feelings about you. Lord only knows I tried to, more times than I care to think about, but it never worked. Like I told you before, I have always loved you, String, and I always will love you." Caitlin sighed as she leaned into String's embrace, both watching their daughter. And it was one of the times that I tried to turn my feelings about you off that brought Saoirse into our lives, and brought us together, she thought.

"And, I'll always love you," Hawke promised. "It's kinda funny, though. One of those times you tried to turn your feelings off about me ended up bringing us together, Caitlin. And I wouldn't take it back, even if I could."

"I wouldn't either, String. But how the heck did you know what I was thinking?"

"Because I was thinking the same thing. And it wouldn't be the first time, Caitlin. And I'm sure it won't be the last, either."

"You're right. It won't be the last time we've been thinking the same thing. But there's something I need to apologize again for, String. I-I need to apologize, again, for doubting you when you said you love me. Because I know you, Stringfellow Hawke. I know you don't say things like that if you don't mean them. I mean, yeah, you tease me sometimes, but you've never outright lied to me since I've known you, and that should have told me everything I needed to know about your feelings. I-I'm sorry I doubted you, and said I needed some time to figure out my feelings about you. I-I think you were right, about our meeting being fate. I know one thing—I wouldn't change anything that's happened since that day I saw you in Bogan's cell." Heck, I wouldn't even change what happened with—him—because if that hadn't happened, I might not be married to String right now!

Hawke smiled and shook his head at his wife. "It's forgotten, Caitlin, and I forgive you. It's like I told you before, I understand why you felt that way, because of the way I treated you for so long. And, the only thing I'd change would be I would have told you I love you a lot sooner than I did." Hawke laughed before he continued, "Y'know, Caitlin, this is going to be a real rough marriage if we keep holding onto all these insecurities. Especially," he said, grinning at Caitlin, "when there are so many more pleasurable things we can hold on to, if you get my drift."

"Yeah, String," Caitlin said, moving closer to Hawke, "I think I really do get your drift." She smiled before he kissed her again. String's right, Caitlin thought as she felt the emotions of her husband's kiss rush through her body again. This is so much more pleasurable than holding on to all the insecurities of the past!

"String?" Cait asked a few moments later. Wow! Even lying here in a hospital bed, String's kiss made my toes curl!

"Yeah, Caitlin?"

"I just wanted to let you know how happy I am that you said you think of Saoirse as your daughter a few minutes ago. Th-that really meant a lot to me, String. I hope you know that."

"I do know that, Cait, and I hope you know that I meant what I said. It's like I said before, though. Even though she's not mine, I love Saoirse just as if she was. And, if Dom could raise another man's child like he did with Saint John and me after our parents died, I don't see why I can't. Don't worry, Cait. I'll always love Saoirse, just the way I'll always love you. I'll always treat Saoirse just as if she was my own daughter, too. As far as I'm concerned, just like you said, Saoirse is my daughter. I promise you that."

"Thank you, String," Caitlin whispered through tears of joy that were welling up in her hazel eyes. "I know you meant every word you said. That's something I love about you, and I'll always love you, too. I promise you that." Caitlin smiled at her husband. One of the many things I love about you, String. Heck, I love everything about Stringfellow Hawke. I still can't believe how everything turned out. String is my husband, and even though she's not his biologically, String is Saoirse's father. I love him so much, and I always will. My life can't get any better, I swear. She smiled as she glanced at their daughter, then back up at String, and she sighed happily when String smiled back and gently kissed her cheek.

"Y'know, String, I never told you this, but when I told you that I needed some time to figure out my feelings about you, I couldn't understand your reaction, or actually, your lack of reaction. You just stepped aside and gave me all the time I needed—and I have to tell you, I think that's why it didn't take me that long to tell you how I felt, if that makes one lick of sense. But I wanted you to know how much I appreciated the fact that you didn't pressure me," she said, her eyes shining with all the love she felt in her heart for him.

Then, she felt compelled to add something. "String, I wanted to tell you something else. I wanted to tell you—again—how sorry I am for saying 'if you're serious' the night you told me how you felt about me. I-I should've known you were serious about your feelings for me the minute you said you love me, because like I said before, I know you well enough to know that you never say things you don't mean. Well, unless you were teasing me, which you've done before. And I was worried about how you'd react to my saying that—I was afraid you'd hate me for saying it, and that my big stupid mouth would screw up any chance we'd have of being together. I feel stupid for saying it, String, and once again, I'm sorry. I'll be honest with you about something. Before this all happened, I was beginning to think there was something wrong with me. Like I wasn't your type, or something." I just hope you can forgive me, someday, for letting my big stupid mouth run away with me like that, she thought, and for when I said, 'I'm the one who fell head-over-heels in love with Sawyer.' After those two boneheaded comments, I really can't believe I'm married to String!

"Well, Caitlin, I knew that if I did pressure you, it might do more harm than good. I mean, I know how you get sometimes when somebody's bugging you—I've heard it when you've argued with your mother on the phone, like after the hijacking, and even before—I still remember you saying, 'Mom, I know I can't have a baby with a helicopter!'—and of course, I remember the argument you had with your mother after you were rescued—and I just figured the best way I could help you with your decision was to step aside and let you have the time you needed so that you could make your mind up on your own. Except for the flowers, of course," Hawke said as Caitlin smiled at him. "And, apology accepted. Just to let you know, I didn't, and I don't, blame you for feeling as if you had to say that, Caitlin. I understood why you felt that way, and I didn't hold it against you. I figured you said that because you were worried that I'd hate you for what happened with Sawyer, or embarrassed that you slept with him or something like that. If you need to hear me say it another way, I forgive you, Cait, just like I told you the night you told me you'd figured out your feelings about me. I don't know why you felt like you had to apologize again, because you already apologized, and I already told you I forgave you, remember?" Hawke smiled warmly at Caitlin, hoping she could see the honesty in his eyes. "Oh, and before you bring that other comment you made up again, I already forgave you for that one, too. Caitlin, there's nothing you could say, or do, that would change how much I love you. Promise me that you'll never forget that. And as far as you thinking there was something wrong with you, that wasn't the case, at all. It was all me, and my stupid paranoia, that kept us apart for so long."

The honesty in Hawke's eyes made Caitlin love him even more. Which I didn't think was possible, considering I already love him with my entire heart and soul. How in the heck did he figure out what I was thinking when I said that, anyway? Caitlin paused for a moment as she gazed at their daughter. I guess it shouldn't surprise me that String knew I was afraid he'd hate me, she thought. It wouldn't be the first time I've had an idea what he was thinking, or vice-versa, like he said before. I do remember String accepting my apology, and telling me he forgave me, before. It's not like I haven't had other things on my mind lately, Caitlin thought excitedly.

"Yeah, I do remember you telling me that, String. But you know I repeat things sometimes when I get excited, and right now, with Saoirse here and knowing you're mine forever, I'm about as excited as I think I've ever been! And I promise you, I'll never forget what you said just now, and I want you to know that I feel the same way. After everything I went through to get to this point with you, String, I guarantee you there's nothing you could say or do that would change how much I love you! And, I am so glad to hear that you're not gonna be worrying so much about that curse. Before you say anything," she added, noticing something in Hawke's eyes, "I know you still want to find Saint John, or find out what's happened to him, and I understand. And I'll be right by your side and help you any way I can. I promise you that.

"But, I wanted you to know that what you did—stepping aside like that and letting me make up my own mind, even though I know you were probably going crazy waiting for me to do it—just made me love you even more than I already do, and I'll never forget it. I told you before that was probably the reason I could make my mind up so danged quick, even though there shouldn't have been any doubts in my mind about how you really feel. I mean, you've never lied to me in all the time I've known you, String, and that should have told me everything I needed to know. Thank you so much, String. For everything, including not hating me for what Sawyer did to me, and for accepting my apologies—both, again—for those stupid comments. And, I promise you, I'm going to spend the rest of our lives trying to make up for saying those things to you."

"Caitlin," he replied, "it was my pleasure. All of it. And I'm glad you understand about Saint John." Hawke smiled as he gently kissed Caitlin's cheek again. "And," he said nervously, "I have something to confess, too. Remember the day Michael came out to the hangar, and I told you he had brought me some information?"

"Yeah," Caitlin said, puzzled. "I never could figure out what information that was, though."

"The day after I found out you were pregnant, I called Michael and asked him for some information about custody in a situation like this. I wanted to know if you had full rights over your baby and would be able to choose someone as her father, since her real father was dead. I decided on my way back to the hangar after I found out about you being pregnant that no matter what, I was going to be here for you and the baby, even knowing what happened, and how you got pregnant. And Michael actually admitted that he didn't know the answer to my question." Caitlin smiled at Hawke, knowing how hard that admission must have been for Michael.

"Well, String, I knew I wanted you to help me raise my—sorry—our baby—from the day I found out I was pregnant, but I was afraid of how you'd react when you found out about what I did with Sawyer, like I said before, and that's another reason why I was staying away from the hangar, because of how embarrassed I was, and how afraid I was of what you'd do when you found out. In fact, I was ready to give my baby up for adoption, because I was convinced you'd hate me for what happened between Sawyer and me. And, I was worried that you'd do to me exactly what Dom told me Tess did to you—that you'd run away from me as soon as you found out that I was pregnant, and especially since I let Sawyer sleep with me, and that's how I got pregnant." I purposely didn't say 'and that Sawyer was the father,' 'cause like I've been saying, String is Saoirse's father, and daddy, Caitlin thought happily.

I didn't know Dom told Cait about what happened between Tess and me, Hawke thought, but I suppose it makes sense that Cait would worry about me doing something like that to her, even though I never would. "Aw, Cait," Hawke said, knowing it was his history that convinced Caitlin he would hate her, "I never could have hated you for what happened, because you're my best friend. I hate Sawyer, for what he did to you. But I understand why you felt that way, especially after I ran out of your apartment the way I did that day," he said, smiling at her. Hawke sighed quietly as he recalled how Tess had run away from him, and he understood why Caitlin felt like he might do the same to her. "I wouldn't have run away, Caitlin. I know how badly it would have hurt you if I had. I mean, I told you how badly I was hurt after Tess ran away from me, and I would never put you through something like that. And, I'm glad you didn't give your baby up for adoption, Cait, 'cause I know how hard that would have been for you to do."

"You're right, String. Giving her up would have been the hardest thing I ever did, and I would've hated myself for the rest of my life if I had. I mean, I would've spent the rest of my life wondering about the family that adopted her. Wondering what they named her, if they told her about me, and if they did tell her about me, what they said, or didn't say, how she felt about me, and how she felt about me giving her up, and all that stuff, but now, I don't have to think about any of that. You're going to be a great daddy to Saoirse, I can tell already. I mean, look how fast she quieted down when you took her from the nurse a little while ago, and how calm she's been while you've held her. That should tell you something right there. It's like she accepts you as her father, String." Like I said before, as far as the rest of the world and I are concerned, String, you are Saoirse's father. No ifs, ands, or buts. Besides, if it's true what I heard—that babies can hear voices from in the womb—then Saoirse has been hearing that wonderful voice of yours all this time, so that probably helped, too.

"It does," Hawke replied, smiling at his wife and daughter again. "And like I told you before, I could never hate you, Caitlin. I mean, I heard what a smooth talker Sawyer was when he was sweet-talking you back at the hangar, so I'm not surprised that he could talk you into letting him sleep with you, especially since it was all part of his plan. I never blamed you, though, Cait. I blame Sawyer, pure and simple. I wish that I hadn't just blasted him out of the sky the way I did, to be honest with you. I feel like I let him off the hook too easy. If I could do it over again, I would've forced him to land and brought him back to the ship, and then the three of us could have beaten the hell out of him. Together, of course," he added with a smile that melted Caitlin's heart.

"String, something else has been bugging me. What about—?"

"You mean, 'what about the curse,' right?" String interrupted, and Caitlin nodded anxiously. "Well, I did a lot of thinking about that, and I realize that with everything you've come through, and survived, ever since you came looking for me, maybe I don't have to worry so much about it. I mean, when we were on that island together, you faced the possibility that you might die about as bravely as anybody I ever met. Not to mention how you helped me keep myself together long enough to stop those Russian missiles, remember? In addition, there was the way you kicked my butt at Horn's compound. With everything you've been through and survived, including all the stuff you told me about that happened to you when you were in Texas, before you even knew I existed, not to mention everything Dom's been through since we recovered Airwolf from Moffett, I guess I finally realize that curse doesn't really exist." He smiled at Caitlin again and received the best reward possible when she directed one of her best, most mind-blowing 'million-dollar smiles' at him—the kind of smile that Hawke had long ago determined melted his heart.

"I remember all of it, String, and I've been hoping like crazy that you'd realize what a bunch of bunk that curse thing was, someday!"

"I finally do, Caitlin. Don't get me wrong, though. I still want to find Saint John or find some conclusive evidence of what happened to him if he's not still alive, and I'm glad you can understand how I feel about that. But I want you to know that I'm going to spend a lot less time worrying that I'm cursed, especially when there are so many more positive things happening in my life, knowing that you and I are together now, forever, and we're going to raise our beautiful little girl."

"Yeah," Caitlin murmured, suddenly feeling drowsiness setting in, "you and me, together forever. The way I always wanted us to be." The way we're supposed to be, she thought, feeling another wave of love and happiness wash over her, especially when Hawke said, 'and we're going to raise our beautiful little girl.' He did it again, she thought. String just proved how much he loves me yet again, when he said that. God, if I'm dreaming, don't you dare wake me up! Caitlin caught the special emphasis Hawke put on 'our beautiful little girl,' and felt her heart take flight.

"And the way we always will be, Mrs. Hawke," String replied, not surprised when tears began forming in Caitlin's hazel eyes again.

"Say that again, String."

"The way we always will be, Mrs. Hawke." Caitlin smiled up at Hawke again before she kissed him deeply, with every ounce of love she felt for him.

Mrs. Hawke. Caitlin Hawke. The name I'll never get tired of hearing. It doesn't matter how many times, or which way I hear it—I know that 'Caitlin Hawke' is the name I'll carry for the rest of my life, she thought as she broke off the kiss. "Yeah," she murmured happily, after she caught her breath,"the way we always will be." Her smile could have lit up the hospital room for the next three weeks. 'Cause now that I've got you, String, I'll never let you go. Ever. When Judge Clevenger asked if I took you as my husband, "for as long as you both shall live," and I said, "Yes. I do," on our wedding day, I meant it! And I plan to live a very long and happy life with you, String. Long enough for Saoirse to get a baby brother or baby sister, for us to see Saoirse get married, and for us to become grandparents, spoiling our grandkids rotten, just like I know Dom, and my mother, will do with Saoirse. Heck, I'm even excited to see your reaction when Saoirse starts dating, although, if she meets and ends up marrying a guy like you, String, our daughter will be just fine. But I want to grow old with you, Stringfellow Hawke. And someday, after Airwolf's been retired to a museum or whatever, and Saoirse's all grown up and it's just you and me again, I want us to spend our evenings wrapped in a big blanket on the porch back home, looking up at the stars.

I swear I have never felt as loved as I do right now. Just the way I thought before, I didn't think it was possible for a human being to feel as happy, wonderful, loved, as in love, and as alive as I do right at this moment, even though I'm in a hospital bed. I hope I keep feeling this way for the rest of my life. I know one thing—between String and me, Dom, my mother, and even Michael and Marella, Saoirse is never going to feel neglected, or feel like she's not loved! Caitlin sighed happily, as she watched String take their daughter, then something Dr. Robertson told her the day she found out she was pregnant crossed Caitlin's mind, and she let out a quiet laugh, but String heard her.

"What's so funny, Cait?" Hawke demanded when he heard his wife chuckle slightly.

"I was just thinking about something Dr. Robertson said to me the day she told me that I was pregnant—she asked me about you, actually. She told me that the times she'd seen you here with me, like that time I got knocked out and wound up with a concussion, she thought you really cared about me as more than just a friend, and she wondered if you might help me raise Saoirse. Of course, I didn't know how you felt about me yet, so I told her I didn't think you'd do anything for me, and that I didn't want to dump this on you, anyway. 'Cause even though I wanted you to help me raise our baby, I figured if I dumped the fact that I was pregnant—especially when I dumped how I got pregnant—on you, that you'd turn tail and run back to the cabin—or I guess, now, I can say back home—faster than Airwolf can accelerate to Mach 1 under full turbos, and I didn't want that to happen."

"I hope you'll always think of the cabin as your home, Caitlin."

"I will, String. I promise. It's just that it wasn't home for me when I was worrying that you'd run back there when you found out about what Sawyer did. But now, I'll always think of the cabin as our home. You know I've always felt real comfortable there, String." Caitlin smiled up at Hawke, and he saw the truth of her words shining in the blue-green eyes that he loved. And I felt that way because I belong there, she thought happily.

Hawke smiled when Caitlin said, 'I'll always think of the cabin as our home.' "I'm glad, Caitlin. So, what did she mean when she said, 'Cait, looks like you were wrong about Hawke'?"

"Like I said, String, I told her I didn't think you'd do anything for me, even though I knew you cared about me as a good friend. I mean, I hate to admit it now, but when she told me that, I didn't think you loved me, at least not the way I know you do now. I didn't think your feelings went any deeper than just good friendship, and I certainly didn't think we'd end up married! But I have never been happier to be wrong about anything in my life!"

"That's funny, Cait. Judge Clevenger told me something a lot like what Dr. Anderson told you. He said that he hoped I wasn't just marrying you because of the baby the day we got married, and I told him that I've always loved you, even when I was denying it. I told you before that I wouldn't have run away from you, Cait, and I meant it. I think I would have finally admitted how I feel about you eventually, though. Like I said before, I've been in love with you for a very long time, but just afraid to admit it. I just wish it hadn't taken you getting pregnant to give me the kick in the rear end I needed to admit how I feel about you. But then again, I suppose it shouldn't surprise me. Saint John always did say I was the stubborn one, and you know how stubborn I can be about as well as anybody, except maybe Dom."

"The way it happened doesn't matter to me anymore, baby, so I don't want you worrying about it anymore." Caitlin said, smiling at her husband. "All that matters now is that we love each other and that we're going to raise our baby, together." And I do know how stubborn you are, Stringfellow Hawke, but I'm not gonna say a word about it, because like I just said, none of that matters any more. We belong to each other, now, just the way I've always hoped we would, Caitlin thought happily, and that's it. Period. End of sentence, end of story.

"Yeah. Just like you said you always wanted us to be, and the way we will be, forever." Hawke smiled down at his daughter and was surprised when she smiled back at him. "Cait, look! She-she smiled at me!"

"She loves you, String, just like I knew she would." Caitlin felt tears in her eyes as Saoirse turned her little head toward her mother's voice and repeated her newly discovered trick. "Hey there, pretty girl," Caitlin said, smiling through her tears as Saoirse grabbed Caitlin's index finger in her tiny hand.

"She is going to be a pretty girl, just like her mommy," Hawke said. Which is going to give me any number of sleepless nights in about fifteen or sixteen years, when she starts dating, he thought. Well, maybe I'll just lock her in the cabin until she's twenty-five. Or maybe thirty-five. Nah. Cait would never let me hear the end of it if I did that. There's no point in worrying about the future now, though. Like Dom always said, that kind of worrying is just going to give me a lifetime fulla bills!

Caitlin stifled a yawn. "Of all the times you've rescued me, this has to be the best one. I mean, not only did you rescue me from Sawyer, you rescued me from having to make a choice of either giving my baby up for adoption, and the lifetime of guilt I would have felt if I had given her up, or from having to raise Saoirse alone. I love you, String."

"I love you, too, Caitlin, and I promise you that I'll always be here to rescue both of you, no matter what." Hawke smiled at his wife and daughter before he sealed his promise to them with another kiss. And I think, now, I understand why I could never tell Gabrielle, or even Kelly, 'I love you.' Because they weren't supposed to hear it from me. But with Caitlin, I don't have any problem telling her that I love her, because we're supposed to be together. And now, we are. I—I just wish I could have rescued you from Sawyer talking you into sleeping with him, the way he did. But, he thought, remembering something Caitlin had said earlier, that's all in the past, and I promised Caitlin I'd stop worrying about the past, and concentrate on raising our daughter. And that's exactly what I'm going to do. Then, Hawke heard Caitlin saying something else, and pulled himself back into the moment.

"And I'll tell you something else. After I made that stupid comment—the second one, I mean—I was scared that you'd hate me, and that I'd never feel as loved as I had before I said it. You know what I mean? When we're together, String, I feel more loved, and more in love, than I've ever felt in my life, and I didn't want to lose that, but I was afraid my big stupid mouth had ruined it. And, I'll tell you something else. When you said, 'I'd rather be scared with you, than brave without you,' that really hit home for me, because I feel the exact same way."

"I know, Caitlin, I know. But it's like I've told you before, and I'll keep on telling you, if I have to—there's nothing you can say, or do, that would change how much I love you. Promise me you'll never forget that. From now on, we'll face everything, and be scared, or brave, together."

"I promise, I'll never forget that again, String. And I feel the same way about you. And, I'm sure glad to hear that."

"And I promise you, Caitlin, I'll never forget that." Hawke's smile, and the smile he received from Caitlin, could have lit up the hospital room for the next hour, at least.

"Caitlin, do you remember when you asked me if I'd ever wanted something so badly that it was hard to believe when I actually got it?"

"Yeah."

"Well, that's how I feel, right now." Hawke smiled at his wife and daughter through the tears in his eyes. The only thing that would make this any better would be if Saint John was here, with us, Hawke thought.

"I feel the same way." Caitlin sighed happily as she watched Hawke with their daughter, even as she finally began giving in to the fatigue she felt.

"By the way, Caitlin, Judge Clevenger told me something else－he told me that Sawyer didn't have any family members around that can claim our daughter. So we don't have anything to worry about on that note."

"That's real good to know, String, but can we please not talk about that bastard anymore?"

"That'll be the last time, I promise you." Hawke said, kissing his bride again, to seal his promise to her.

I don't know what the future holds, but I know that Cait and I'll face it—together. Then Hawke noticed Caitlin falling asleep, so he took Saoirse for a few more minutes. As he glanced down at their daughter, he smiled at her, even though he figured she couldn't respond, and murmured, "Don't you worry, Saoirse. Daddy loves you very much, and I always will." Hawke was shocked when Saoirse appeared to smile at him again, and he fought a wave of tears as he called for a nurse a few minutes later to take Saoirse to the nursery. I couldn't hate that sweet little girl, even knowing who her biological father was. That doesn't matter now. Because as far as I'm concerned, she's my daughter, and that's not ever going to change. And God? I-I know you and I haven't been on the best of terms, but I wanted to thank you for two things. Thank you for bringing Caitlin O'Shannessy—or should I say, Caitlin Hawke—into my life, and for keeping her in my life long enough for me to get my head straight about my feelings for her. Hawke felt happier than he could recall feeling in a long time, as the nurse took Saoirse from him and he felt Caitlin sink into his arms, her head coming to rest on his chest.

I can't believe how things have turned out. Sometimes, I think I'm supposed to be with Caitlin. I mean, she, she gets me, like no other woman I've ever known. Even more than Kelly, and even Gabrielle. Not to mention the fact that she's probably one of the few women who has a sense of humor like mine, which is one reason she's my best friend, and now my wife. I never understood what Dad meant when he used to call Mom his 'soulmate,' until right now. Because I know, now, that Caitlin Hawke is my soulmate, and now, we're together, forever. And I know one thing—there's nobody in the world that I'd rather be with for the rest of my life, however long that is, than Caitlin. It's like I told her, even when I was fighting my feelings, I think I've always loved Caitlin. Then, something the doctor had said crossed Hawke's mind. "And your daughter makes you a beautiful family." Family, Hawke thought. What a beautiful word. I-I guess I got the 'happily ever after' that Mom used to tell Sinj and me about, and I always thought I'd never have, especially after Gabrielle died. And I know I wouldn't want to be with anybody but Caitlin.

His happiness only increased a few moments later as he heard Caitlin sigh with happiness as he pulled her closer to his body. Now I know Caitlin's as happy as I am. Hawke smiled as he felt sleep claim him.

As Caitlin watched Hawke with Saoirse before she fell asleep, she knew she'd made the right decision. Even though Saoirse's not his child, I can already see how much he loves my little girl. Caitlin smiled, even as she wiped a few stray tears out of her eyes. String thinks of her as his daughter, the same way that I do. Then, as she stared at her wedding ring, Caitlin heard String tell Saoirse, 'Daddy loves you very much. And I always will,' and her heart took flight. I can't believe what I just heard—String said 'Daddy loves you' to my—Oops. I mean—to our daughter. So much for me thinking my life can't get any better, because it just did. What String just said, that just makes me love him even more than I already do. I didn't think that was possible, though. After all, I already love him with my whole heart, mind, body, and soul. Caitlin felt tears come to her eyes as she tried to stay awake, watching String with Saoirse. I still feel like I'm dreaming—but String loves me despite everything that happened. He loves me, and he married me even though I slept with that dirtbag Sawyer, and was pregnant with his baby. Now, String and I are together forever. The way I always wanted us to be, even though I danged sure know I don't deserve to be String's wife, after what I did, letting Sawyer sleep with me like that.

That's just another reason I love String so doggone much, and why I'll always love him. Because he didn't look down on me for what happened, or blame me for it. Just like I've been saying, String accepts Saoirse as his daughter, even though she's not. But I'm never going to think about Sawyer again, or the fact that he was the one who got me pregnant. Like I told String, he is Saoirse's father. Period. End of sentence, and end of story.

What the heck did I do right, to wind up with a great guy like Stringfellow Hawke for my husband, and Saoirse's father, after doing something so completely wrong as letting that dirtbag bastard Sawyer sleep with me, anyway? Whatever it is, I hope I never stop doing it.

Then another thought hit her. Mom is going to flip when I tell her that String and I are married! Not to mention the fact that she'll owe him an engraved apology for all those nasty names she's ever called him, and all the nasty things she and Erin both told me about him, and I won't rest until he gets it! Of course, we'll still have to figure out how we're going to explain Saoirse to her without getting String in a whole mess of trouble, but String and I'll have a talk and figure that out later, together. Right now, I just want to enjoy being married to String, the way I've wanted to be ever since I met him. I swear I feel like the luckiest woman on the face of the earth! Heaven knows I'm the happiest woman on the face of the earth, no question about it.

Caitlin paused for a minute and considered the roller coaster of emotions she'd been on since she found out she was pregnant. When Dr. Robertson told me I was pregnant, I felt like that was the lowest point of my life. I mean, I could have just crawled into a hole and died. And then there was the roller coaster of emotions I went on after String told me he loved me—even though it was mostly my own worrying about what String was gonna do, and my out-of-whack hormones that made me feel like that. Right now, though, knowing that String is mine forever, and that we're going to raise Saoirse together, I feel happier, more in love, and more alive than I ever thought it was possible for a human being to feel. Caitlin remembered how she had thought about giving her baby up for adoption, so it would have a good life. Well, we won't have to worry about that now, do we? She thought excitedly. Because String and I are going to raise her together, and she's going to have the best life any baby could ask for, with a mommy and daddy who love her to the moon and back and who love each other just as much! Not to mention Dom, and my mother. They're going to be wonderful grandparents, and they're gonna love Saoirse the same way String and I do! And of course, I can't forget 'Uncle' Michael and 'Aunt' Marella. Probably Marella more so than Michael, though. I'd bet she'll fall in love with Saoirse the first time she meets her, just like String and I have. Caitlin sighed happily when she saw String holding Saoirse, then she saw a nurse come and take her. Must be taking her to the nursery for a while, she thought, and that's okay.

God? I know I said I'd never ask you for anything else, but could you just do me one more real tiny favor? If I'm dreaming, could you please not let me wake up? Caitlin knew that if she woke up and found out that everything that had occurred up until now had been a dream, she wouldn't be able to handle it. Unless that meant that Sawyer and I didn't really sleep together. That, I wouldn't mind being able to write off as just a bad dream, she thought. The rest, though—especially String admitting that he loves me, and marrying me, I would hate to find out that it's all been a dream! Just then, Hawke turned to her and said, "Caitlin, trust me. This isn't a dream. We really got married, and I'm really going to be Saoirse's father, just the way I promised you I would. Oh, and you can stop staring at your rings, because they're not going anywhere, and neither am I. This is forever, you and me, just like I told you on our wedding day." Hawke grinned at Caitlin as he caught her staring at her wedding and engagement rings again.

"How the heck did you—oh, never mind," she said, smiling at her husband. "But just so you know, my rings are the most important things in the world to me!" 'Cause they're a symbol of how much we love each other, String, but if you'd rather I stare at you, I'm sure happy to do that! She smiled up at her husband, seeing every ounce of love he had for her reflected in his steel-blue eyes. "I just can't believe that I've finally got everything I've ever wanted–I finally know that you love me the same way I love you, and now you're my husband, and we're going to be together, forever, and raise our daughter. I feel like I'm dreaming, or something."

"I'm glad to hear that, Cait, because my wedding ring is the most important thing in the world to me, too," Hawke replied. As he looked into Caitlin's hazel eyes, he saw them light up with every ounce of love she said she had for him, and Hawke knew she saw the same love in his own eyes. "And I understand you feeling that way, too, Cait. I will say this—if you're dreaming, then I'm having the exact same wonderful dream, and I've never heard of two people having the same dream at the same time, so it's real. I promise you that. I love you, Cait. You and Saoirse, and I always will. And, I'll be honest with you—right now, with you and our daughter, I am happier than I ever thought I could possibly be."

"I'm so happy to hear that, and I love you too, String. Like I said the day you proposed to me, you already have made me happier than I ever thought it was possible for me to be, so I can't wait to see what the rest of our lives brings!" Caitlin sighed happily, as the nurse took Saoirse away to rest in the nursery, and she felt Hawke pull her closer to his body. Caitlin sank into Hawke's arms, her head coming to rest on his chest, one ear directly over his heart. I swear, God, now I know my life can't get any better, especially after hearing String say 'Daddy loves you' to our daughter the way he did. I mean, I've got our daughter, and now, after everything that happened, and even though I know I danged sure don't deserve to be, I'm married to the best friend I ever had, and the man of my dreams. Heck, as far as I'm concerned, String isn't just my husband, or just my best friend—I swear, with the way he seems to know what I'm thinking so much of the time, Stringfellow Hawke has to be my soulmate, the same way Mom and Daddy used to say they were each other's soulmates, or how Dom told me that String's parents called each other their soulmates.

I never thought I'd be able to call String my husband, but now, I can. How did I ever get so lucky, to have someone like String in my life, first as the best friend I've ever had, and now as my husband, now and forever? Thank you so much, God, for bringing Stringfellow Hawke into my life, and for helping him figure out his feelings about me! My life is perfect now. Caitlin felt happier than she could ever recall feeling, as she realized that she was finally in the place she'd wanted to be ever since she first met Stringfellow Hawke. Finally, she thought, I'm finally String's wife, and we're going to be together, forever. She smiled as she fell asleep in her husband's arms, pondering the future.

THE END.

A/N—I must confess, I know nothing about custody arrangements in a case like this, where the father dies before the child is born. And most of what I've looked up on the Internet hasn't told me a heckuva lot, so if there are errors in what I've written, chalk it up to lack of knowledge and information on my part. I hope that you'll enjoy the story anyway, in spite of that—robertwnielsen