In Remembrance of Me. . .
It has been 100 years since she last graced his presence. It was 100 years since she sprouted her wings and flew into the open arms of heaven's warmth. It has been 100 years since he has laid her to rest in this very spot. It has been 100 years since the last time. . .he cried.
"Sephiroth," He would hear her call. "Sephiroth?" He would always hear her call. "Where are you?" Her voice was always soft and inquisitive. "Why are you still there?" He could mentally picture her tilting her head in childlike curiosity. "Why aren't you here with me?"
And every time she asked, he always answered the voice in his heart with this response: "Because even death will not accept me as I am."
His name is and will forever be Sephiroth. His legend will never be forgotten. The blood on his hands shall never be cleansed. But it was she who looked past it all. . . Aeris Gainsborogh. It will be a love never forgotten for an eternity.
He traces his fingers down upon the elegantly engraved letters of her name upon her tombstone as he places a solitary rose upon her grave. Each pedal of that rose was symbolic of the love they once shared. Each pedal was a reminder of how his heart longed for her. Each pedal shed was tear she had taught him to shed. The rose,however, was much intact, much like his heart, and he did not shed a tear. For he feared that if one single drop escaped from his solemn blue eyes, a devastating flood would soon follow that would wash his heart off of the precipe that he had laid his wife to rest.
He had chosen this cliff for her burial for several reasons, but none of the other reasons could compare to the breathtaking view. Past the point of the jutted precipe, echoed the rhythm of the water plunging from atop the soft waterfall that gracefully hid the cave beneath it. He had liked to come here often to think...and reflect, overlooking the placid pool of cool water beneath it. He had begun to bring Aeris here as his father had brought his wife there before that. It had once been a joyous place for later couple until his mother was put to rest behind the facade of a happy little waterfall. Now, it was the home of another soul as well. May they both rest in peace.
"Aeris. . .so much has changed since you have left me--" He cleared his throat, embarrassed by the slip of his tongue, although nothing could have been closer to the truth in regard to the way he felt.". . .Err...left. We have been traveling...Vincent and I. There is no place in the world for people like us, Aeris. With perhaps the exception of the lion, Nanaki, we are the sole survivors of our journey." He stiffened, feeling the burning sensation of tears welling up inside of his now weary eyes. The sharp alertness that had once haunted his eyes had now melted into a soft, solemn stare. "It--It is a long, lonesome journey...One I suspect you would have enjoyed. So many of the beautiful things I have seen remind me of you." He paused, taking a moment to turn away from the grave, so that Aeris would somehow not see him on the verge crying. "I--it is hard to keep living without you. . .There have been so many times that I have wished to throw myself off of this cliff just to land in your loving arms." He shook his head forcefully. " But I know that cannot be. My Jenova cells prevent me from joining you in the lifestream as Vincent's. . . experimentation. . .prevents him from joining you and . . . my mother as well. It--It is just hard. . ." He slowly sat down on the edge of the cliff, letting his feet dangle dangerously over the edge as he continues to look away."I cannot--It is...I cannot express my. . .emotions as Vincent can. It pains me to be so far apart from you...You are...like...a dream I cannot touch. Every night. . .I dream of you. . .only to wake up to realize you are not there." A solitary tear dripped down his pale skin and he almost scolded himself for letting it slip.It was in her memory that he let it abide, slowly trailing down his cheek until it plunged from the edge of his jaw. " I realize I do not come and visit often enough. . . You are in no way a burden to me. I enjoy traveling here every year ,and sometimes even more so, to speak to you. Even in these past one hundred years, I still have not found anyone that has known me quite to the depth as you, and I have come to the realization that no one ever will. To be truthful with you, I am ...glad that no one has seen me in such a light. Aeris...no one will ever replace you."
He fell silent once more, his mind lost in a fog of memories from the past and emotions from the present. Images danced through his mind of her beautiful face, her loving smile...and her warm embrace that he could still feel at that very moment. . .until the chilled breeze of reality winnowed through the blurred realm of remembrance and reality. He involuntarily shuddered as the breeze slowly lifted any hint of the embrace away.
His sense of loneliness was quickly consumed by a growing sense of anger and resentment. He abruptly looked over his shoulder as his eyes narrowed upon the tombstone with an intense heat.
"You had to leave me?! Why?!!" Within himself he knew this was illogical. Death was a natural part of life. "You always knew all of the answers to the questions I did not even ask! Why can you not answer this?!" His fists clenched. His heart pounded. His body stiffened. "Why?!"
The question echoed throughout the mountains in a haunting manner, each refrain bringing him back closer to reality.
"Aeris. . ." He slowly turned to face her grave. "I . . . I am sorry. I should not have raised my voice at you. I know you could not help it. You could not help dying, but I am so. . ." He paused, not wanting to admit weakness, but after a few moments, he could no longer withhold it ". . .lonely without you." He awaited himself to mentally correct his weakness, but found that he had no reprimand to give.
He squatted down beside her grave and rested his head upon his forearms, resulting in a ball for several long moments. The words "I love you. I miss you. I want to be with you" played in refrain over and over again in his mind. Her image danced across his closed eye lids until he felt a firm hand grasp his shoulder and squeezed it slightly. He slowly turned his head to find Vincent's stiff form standing behind him.
"Are you ready?"
Sephiroth nodded as he climbed to his feet. For a moment, he thought of asking Vincent how his visit with Lucrecia was, but he quickly thought different of it when he realized how much of a violation of the trust between he and Lucrecia would be. The older man simply turned around with his head down and walked away in silence. Sephiroth took one last fleeting glance at wife's grave before he turned and walked away.