A/N: This is a continuation of Give Love A Try. It's from Julian's point of view.
Julian was tired of it. He was tired of seeing that Windsor boy following Logan around like a lost puppy. But he was even more tired of the fact that they were dating. The couple had basically been inseparable from the start.
Every day, Julian would walk to the classroom building with Derek and Logan. At least he used to. Now, Logan left earlier to walk with Blaine. The worst part was that they acted sickeningly sweet and adorable.
Blaine was a new Warbler. He was still a little shy about singing solos for anyone. The only person who could persuade him to sing was his boyfriend. Julian didn't have to be a Warbler to know that. The pair practically owned the Stuart common room after school when they weren't in the Warbler's Hall.
One day, Julian finally got fed up with seeing them everywhere. He needed to blow off some steam, so he headed to the Warbler's Hall.
"Who cares if I'm not a Warbler? I'm Julian motherfucking Larson. You're charging ridiculous tuition just because I go to school here," he grumbled to himself silently.
Just as he reached the entrance to the music room, he heard voices… And guitars. The voices were far too familiar to Julian. Dropping his schoolbag on the floor, he peered through the door that was left slightly ajar.
"Ugh. What are they doing here? It's Wednesday. They're always in the common room on Wednesday's," he thought.
Sure enough, he saw Logan and Blaine waltzing around the room as they played acoustic guitars.
"Logan can play the guitar? Huh. Anderson must really have some patience," he scoffed.
He continued watching and listening even though every drop of logic in his body told him to run. His stubbornness overrode the logic.
He heard the song end with, "Give love a try, one more time… One more time."
Then there was silence. Curiously, Julian peeked through the crack once more, already knowing what he would see. There, Julian's best friend had his lips locked with the new kid's.
That's when he snapped. Julian backed away from the door, picked up his schoolbag and strode back to Stuart as quickly and composed as he could. He swiftly swiped his keycard through the slot and flung the front door open, the let it slam shut behind him.
Derek rolled his eyes and handed him a cup of coffee as he stomped up the stars to his room. The Stuarts all immediately stood aside to let him through to avoid his withering glares. A group of freshman seemed oblivious to the commotion downstairs just moments before and accidentally blocked Julian's path. One glower sent them all scurrying.
Finally reaching his room, Julian threw down his schoolbag and snatched up his electric guitar. Then he made his way back downstairs to the common room where Derek stopped him.
"The Honor Society's using the common room to study for their SAT's," he said, shrugging, "Sorry, Jules."
Julian sighed dramatically and walked out of Stuart. He trudged through the small layer of snow until he reached the front step of Windsor, and then barged in. No one would hear or see him anyways. What's the point? He was invisible.
As he sauntered down the hall towards the Windsor common room, Ethan and Evan joined him.
"Hello, Cheshire!" Evan chirped from the right side of him.
"What brings you here? Did you fall down the rabbit hole?" Ethan grinned from the other side.
"None of your business and no I did not," Julian replied, not bothering to stop or look at them.
"Evan! Ethan! Quit terrorizing everyone!" Charlie shouted as he strolled towards them.
"Ooh! Gotta skitter!" they said simultaneously, running off to cause more mischief.
Julian stopped in front of the common room doors just as Charlie caught up to him.
"What are you doing here, Larson?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at him.
"None of your business, Amos," he said, reaching for the doorknob.
Blocking him, Charlie said, "Actually, it is. I'm a Windsor. You're a Stuart. This is Windsor house. Now, talk."
The actor glanced at the Windsor and replied, "I need to use your common room to practice this song for my next audition. Ours is being used by the Honor Society for their SAT prep."
"What about Warbler's Hall?" Charlie said, folding his arms.
"Occupied by the White Rabbit and the Knave," Julian said curtly.
The soon-to-be prefect paused in thought, then moved out of the way. "You've probably got about 15 minutes before someone interrupts you. Knock yourself out."
"Awesome. Thanks," the brunet Stuart nodded, slipping into the Windsor common room.
Determined to get his frustration out, the actor slid onto the piano bench, propped up his sheet music, and promptly began playing.
We were picture perfect,
Flawless on the surface.
We were walking on a straight line.
Julian thought back to freshman year. To before the real drama began.
We were automatic,
You seemed so fanatic.
I was confident and wide eyed.
Back then, Julian and Logan were joined at the hip. He took small roles in shows and movies at first. Logan's crushes were little and faded quickly. Things were definitely different than last year.
Tough times, watched us come undone.
You found someone.
Julian started receiving more and more screen time as the public became familiar with him. Logan fell for someone harder than he ever had. And Julian wasn't around to stop him from falling.
As he played through the chorus of the song, Julian flashed back to the summer before sophomore year. When Logan and Derek had visited Julian in California that summer, he felt normal for once.
Before coming to Dalton, he had always been the kid being pulled out of school for weeks at a time to audition in Hollywood. He didn't have many friends. The ones he did have left him. They didn't want to fill him in on everything he'd missed in their lives.
That summer, Julian had best friends. They put up with everything he threw their way. And he didn't ever want to lose them.
But now he was losing one. The one he loved as more than a friend. He was losing him to another boy. And it killed Julian inside.
It feels like a nightmare
To see your hands in his hair.
You seem happy ever after.
Logan and Blaine seemed so in love. They were everywhere Julian looked. His heart cracked more each time he saw them.
I'm stuck in denial.
I'll just fake a smile.
You play innocent.
It's so damn hard.
Either Julian was an unbelievably amazing actor or Logan was insanely oblivious. The way Julian let his mask fall sometimes should've given something away. He'd caught himself staring at Logan a few times, but Logan hadn't noticed.
He was even more ignorant now that he was dating Blaine. He was barely aware of anything anymore.
Slow down, I want back what's mine.
Can we rewind?
Julian asked himself what would've happened if he hadn't taken the recurring guest role on Something Damaged. Would he have been able to stop Logan from falling for Blaine? Would Logan have fallen for him instead? Or would things still have turned out the same?
If he could rewind time, would Julian go back and change history? Would he take away the one thing besides his friends that actually made Logan happy?
No, he wouldn't. He couldn't do that to Logan or to Blaine. More so to Logan. He could never forgive himself if he stood in the way of what made Logan happy.
But doesn't his happiness count for anything?
So much for happy endings.
So much for miracles.
So much for letting go.
It feels so typical.
I miss you…
I miss you…
If Blaine was who Logan wanted, Julian wasn't about to stand in the way. But he didn't have to like it either.
He missed Logan terribly. Even though they lived in the same dorm, they barely saw each other anymore. And when they did, it was usually to talk about Blaine or the Windsors.
We were picture perfect,
Flawless on the surface.
We were walking on a straight line…
He missed the way things used to be. But he knew it would never be the same.
Tell me why I think about you.
And tell me if you think about me.
And tell me when you touch him,
Is it really love or just another fantasy?
Julian wondered if Logan was truly in love with Blaine or if Blaine was just a phase. The evidence was in favor of true love.
And tell me does he make you laugh?
And tell me does he make you scream?
Tell me, "It's over, it's only a dream."
What I found out about you.
He wished with every fiber of his being that he was dreaming. Soon, he would wake up in his bed, filled with hope that someday, maybe, Logan would fall in love with him.
Deep down, he knew that wasn't the case.
Tell me, "It's over, it's only a dream."
And tell me does he get you?
Take away your breath?
Just tell me that it can't be true.
What I found out about you…
The last notes resounded throughout the room as Julian rubbed his eyes quickly to keep the tears from escaping.
"Ugh, c'mon now. Time to put the mask back on," he thought to himself.
He gathered his sheet music and walked out of the common room with his head held high.
As he exited Windsor and began his journey back to Stuart, a trio on the upper level of Windsor sat in awe of what they just witnessed.
"Thank you for letting us watch, Caterpillar," said Ethan.
"I think we've gotten all the information we need," nodded Evan.
"No problem," Han said, shrugging as he switched back to his MMORPG.
The twins left the gamer alone in his room and began their descent down the stairs.
"What do you think we should do with this valuable information?"
"…Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"I always am, 'Dee."
"I know, 'Dum. Shall we?"
"Yes, we shall."
Meanwhile, Julian arrived back in his own house. He strolled past the common room, glancing in as he passed it.
Inside, Logan was sitting on the couch with his arm around Blaine as they read a textbook together.
"Oh, hey Jules! Where've you been?" Logan said, looking up from the book.
Julian shrugged and said, "Just around," and walked away.
Upon reaching his room once again, he placed the sheet music on his desk and flopped down on his bed.
Rolling over, he picked up a picture frame from the nightstand.
Inside was a photo of a sign that read, "If not today, then maybe someday."