AN: I would like to dedicate this story to my friend Dark Twilight Angel, aka "Dawn". And many thanks to the amazing beta reading job done by Link-luvr, she was so awesome!
Disclaimer:I don't own Tales of Symphonia, I wish I did, but I don't. ^^ Also I don't own the song "I Miss You" by Miley Cyrus.
I Miss You
"Mommy, are we there yet?" whined the child, her burgundy eyes tired from the early wake up. She sighed deeply a moment later and amused herself by picking at her pink kimono.
The older woman chuckled at the young girl's short attention span. They had only left the house ten minutes ago; after a long wrestle to put the young girl's long brown hair into a ponytail. The older woman sighed recalling the millions of knots she'd had to untangle and the trouble it was when the little girl wouldn't sit still.
"Oh Martel. Leave you poor kimono alone or you might wreck it," laughed Sheena. "You are just like your father. Very impatient. I promise you that we'll be there soon."
They continued walking steadily down the dirt road. She couldn't help but stare at the cloudy blue skies. The countryside always held a sense of calm and quiet to her, though that brought with it a sense of loneliness.
'How many years has it been?' she wondered, 'Since the two worlds had been united to become one? How long has it been since the search for the Centurion Cores, and when we believed that Lloyd had become our enemy. It's hard to believe that I'll be turning thirty eight this year, and faced more dangers and had more adventures then most people have in their lifetime. But I suppose that's how it goes, being a ninja. At least now it's over, and peace has remained for the last few years. Even finding mercenary jobs can be hard, but then again it has left a lot more time to spend with Martel.' She felt so lost in her memories. The years had gone by so fast it seemed almost impossible.
"Mommy? Why are you so quiet?" asked Martel. Her little face filled with concern and worry.
"On nothing sweetie. Just thinking about stuff," replied Sheena. She realized that her day dreaming had worried her daughter and turned her focus back to her.
"Were you thinking about daddy again?"
"Yes I was. And a few other things too. "
"Oh I see."
Finally they reached their destination and they stood for a moment in front of two silver gates. Slowly she pushed opened the first gate and they slowly walked through hills of stone plates. She held her daughters hand tighter, as a comfort for both herself and her. Only their footsteps and the rustling of the leaves could be heard as they walked on the windy side walk. The further they walked the more her smile faded. She felt like darkness was consuming the light inside her. This place held to many depressing memories.
"Mommy do you think that daddy will like the flowers I brought?" asked Martel, shaking her out of her gloomily feelings. Martel held the flowers to her face, smelling the beautiful white lilies that she had picked from the garden. She smiled once again at her daughter who helped keep the darkness away.
"Of course sweetie. Your dad loves anything you bring him."
Martel smiled happily at her mother and noticed that they were reaching their destination. She ran ahead of her mother and stopped at the last stone plate.
"You used to call me your angel
Said I was sent straight down from heaven"
"Lloyd," whispered Sheena, when she reached the stone plate and fell to her knees beside her daughter. She felt speechless as her fingers felt the delicate letters engraved in the cold stone plate. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes.
'Here Lies the Hero of Our Great Land
Lloyd Irving
810-834
A Brave Warrior
A Loving Son
A Devoted Husband
A True Friend
Died to keep the Peace and Freedom of our Land'
"Daddy! Me and mommy came to visit you and I brought you very pretty flowers from the garden," chirped Martel, "We really miss you."
She placed the flowers on the gravestone and looked at her mother. She had small tears leaking from her eyes. She knew her mother missed her father greatly. It saddened her every time she saw her mother like this.
"Lloyd," paused Sheena. She tried to compose herself after noticing her daughter's worry. She quickly stopped the tears from falling as she tried placing a fake smile upon her face. She couldn't bear to have her daughter see her like this. Taking a breath she wiped away the last of her tears away.
"Martel has really grown a lot since we last visited you. She's seven now and she's going to enter Raine's class next year. Raine told me that she won't retire from teaching until Martel graduates. She's been a busy woman since she recently got engaged to Regal. Colette and Zelos are expecting their daughter any day now and Genis and Presea are going to move in together," said Sheena, recalling all their friends' recent news.
Martel, however, could see the pain and misery in her. Even without the tears her mother's eyes showed her longing for her husband. She wished her mommy wasn't so sad. Her little arms wrapped around her mother and a silence fell between them.
"Martel, I need to be here alone, can you ride Noishe back home?" asked Sheena. She felt guilty for sending her home but she was becoming mess. She didn't know how much longer she could stay strong.
"Of course mommy! Goodbye daddy," she whispered "Come here Noishe."
The large green dog appeared from the bushes and made its way to Martel. She climbed onto his back and looked once more at her mother. She wanted to reach out and take her mommy with her but knew that her mommy wouldn't leave until she was ready.
"Noishe time for home," commanded Martel. The road home wasn't far and she was in safe hands. The dog followed her orders and soon they disappeared out of sight. When silence was all she heard Sheena finally let herself go and tears trickled from her eyes. She had always told herself and her friends that she would be fine but she knew she couldn't lie to her heart.
"And you'd hold me close in your arms
I loved the way you felt so strong
I never wanted you to leave
I wanted you to stay here holdin' me"
"Sheena, ah you uhmm… I," stuttered Lloyd. His face glowed brightly red, and he won't stop fiddling with his fingers. She stopped walking and stared questioningly at him. They were on a tight schedule to get to Luin and didn't have time for slowing down.
"You look really beautiful today," he said shyly and his eyes stared holes into to the ground.
"Awe Lloyd thank you," chirped Sheena. She leaned over and gave him a small peck on the cheek, which only made him redder. Realizing what she had done, she ran quickly up the road leaving Lloyd in the dust. He felt stunned for a moment, and he rubbed the spot where she had kissed him. A smile crawled on his face as he ran to catch up. When he finally caught up to her, a silence fell between them. Her face was red with embarrassment and her eyes would not meet his.
"If I said you're beautiful again would I get another one?" smiled Lloyd.
"I miss you
I miss your smile
And I still shed a tear
Every once in a while"
"Do you have to be so reckless? You could have got yourself killed out there," lectured Sheena. She sat down beside him on his bed, while the sun set shone brightly out on the horizon. It would have been a wonderful evening if she didn't need to pull out her first aid kit to treat Lloyd. She just wished Lloyd wouldn't be so reckless and hurt himself in battle.
"But—" complained Lloyd.
"No buts mister! You have to think more when you're out there and act more cautiously. You knew as well as I did that I could have handled that attack better than you. I'm a capable fighter and I can defend myself," lectured Sheena. She wrapped a cloth band aid around the cut on his arm. She felt guilty for his injury that he received when he defended her against an attack. Once she was done with his arm she treated his other minor cuts in a similar style.
"Sheena, thank you," he smiled, as she packed away her supplies and her face grew red as she turned away from Lloyd. She couldn't understand why his words had such power over her. She was a trained ninja and yet her emotions could easily be changed by a single word from him.
"Well no problem. How can we destroy the exspheres if we don't have you around, Lloyd? I need you," she chuckled. Her face felt hot and she knew that she should get away. Picking up her supplies she turned towards her backpack sitting across the room on a table.
"More like I couldn't live with myself if I didn't have you around," thought Sheena. Her life was changed completely when she met Lloyd and to live without him seemed impossible.
Lost deeply in her thoughts she never noticed the water bottle lying on the floor until she lost her footing and she felt herself falling backwards. She closed her eyes quickly, waiting for the collision with the floor. But it never came; instead she felt a warm embrace. Opening her eyes, she realized that Lloyd had caught her with his good arm. She was so close to Lloyd now, looking into his burnt crimson eyes their faces came closer and closer.
She felt his warm lips upon hers and for a moment, she forgot how to breathe. He wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her closer and her hands tangled in his brunette hair. Soon they were forced to pull apart, needing air. She smiled at him, her arms still around his neck.
"I love you Sheena" he whispered.
"I love you too Lloyd," she whispered back. He held her so close and she never felt so safe in her life. She wished that he would never let go.
"And even though it's different now
You still here somehow
My heart won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you"
She felt silly but she couldn't resist to the urge to catch the snowflakes falling from the sky. She held out her hand as the snowflakes fell. Each snowflake melted as fast as it had landed in her hand. The city was indeed a gorgeous place with its endless winter. It was simply magical how beautiful a place could be.
"Flanoir is so lovely and peaceful. Even with all its hardships it has faced over the last few years it still stays so perfect," sighed Sheena. She heard his footsteps approach her.
"Yeah, this place always bring back so many memories. I remember the last time we were here. It was about two years ago when we were searching for the Centurion Cores," reminisced Lloyd. Wrapping his arms around her waist, he rested his chin gently on her shoulder. They stood on the balcony underneath the old town church which had always stood proudly, overlooking the city. She always felt safe and warm in his arms. She wouldn't have minded staying out in the cold as long as he was there to hold her.
"Sheena,"
"Yeah?"
"When you first met us you didn't trust us at all," said Lloyd.
"Well of course not, I was sent to kill the chosen," laughed Sheena, "how could I trust my enemies? But if I had trusted you guys earlier then I might have fallen in less holes and traps."
Even after all these years her back stilled ached from falling into all those traps and holes back then. Unlike now. Now when she fell Lloyd was always there to catch her. She heard him chuckle at her comment and for a moment she felt him tense up. Letting go of her, he turned to face her directly. His hand nervously held hers. She became confused at his sudden nervousness towards her.
"But you did in the end. In fact we all grew closer and fought for a better tomorrow," He voice was filled with pride, but sadness echoed in his voice of the sacrifices made in the battles. "As you and I traveled to find the exspheres we grew closer and I've never felt happier in my life. I found love and happiness because of you. Even though you're clumsy it makes me want to take care of you. And through all the hardships we've been through, you always stood by my side. I'm always happy, and complete when I'm with you."
His eyes never once left hers when he spoke. She didn't know what to say. Never had someone spoken with such love and passion towards her.
"Lloyd I—" She became silent for a moment. He let go of her hands and fell to one knee. Slowly he pulled out a little red box out of his pocket.
"Oh my goddess!" she exclaimed.
"Sheena Fujibayashi, will you marry me?" asked Lloyd. He opened the box. Inside sat a thin silver ring with delicate angel wings engraved along the outside, a small elegant diamond placed in the middle.
"I would say yes to no other," she replied. His nervousness disappeared and a large smile appeared on his face. He took the ring and placed it on her finger. As he got up she leaped onto him kissing him deeply. She felt like she was finally in heaven, and the stars seemed to have shone brighter that night.
"You used to call me your dreamer
And now I'm livin' out my dream
Oh, how I wish you could see
Everything that's happenin' for me"
Her heart was beating at such a fast rate and she swore it was going to explode out of her chest. She couldn't understand why she was so nervous. Today was supposed to be a day of excitement. After all, today she was going to become Sheena Irving. She fiddled with her wedding dress and began to squeeze her bouquet tightly.
"You're going to overstress yourself and you know that Lloyd wouldn't like to see his wife like that," laughed Raine, as she helped fixed the dress.
Trying to relax, Sheena took a deep breath and looked at herself in the mirror. Her wedding dress was made of pure elven white silk. It was strapless heart line that was only fitted to the hip, followed by a long skirt that had miniature gems sewn into it so it would glitter whenever it hit light. As a personal touch she had added a pink ribbon that was wrapped around her waist and tied at the back into a large bow. The bottom of the gown was then trimmed with white lace. Her hair had been let down and a small crown was placed on top to hold the veil. She sighed at her image and slowly she touched the necklace she wore. It had been given to her by her grandfather many years ago. It was a traditional jade stone shaped into a tear and the only jewelry she wanted to wear. Somehow everything came together perfectly, but still she couldn't calm herself.
Suddenly she heard the band playing and knew that the ceremony had just started.
"This is the start of my new, happy life," she smiled.
Raine and Colette went out first wearing their red bridesmaid's dresses. A few others went ahead and soon it would be her turn. She held the bouquet tightly in her hand and took another few deep breaths.
"Ready Sheena?" asked Regal. She nodded, as she took Regal's arm.
She went through the doors and walked gracefully down the aisle. People greeted her with smiles, but when she saw Lloyd everything suddenly changed. All her doubts and fears disappeared. It felt like everyone disappeared and it was only Lloyd and her were left.
Regal stopped and smiled, letting her go. She continued to walk and with each step she took, the more blessed she felt inside. Lloyd took her hand and guided her up the steps, towards the pope. His hand felt so warm on hers and she knew there was nothing to regret. Every moment felt perfect and she knew she would never turn back.
"I'm thinkin' back on the past
It's true the time is flyin' by too fast"
"I, Lloyd Irving, take you Sheena Fujibayashi to be my wife, to have and hold from this day forward, for better or worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and health, to love and to cherish until death do us part," he spoke.
"Now Sheena please speak your vows," explained the Pope. She nodded and looked stared deeply at Lloyd.
"I, Sheena Fujibayashi, take you Lloyd Irving to be my husband, my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day then I did before. I will love you faithfully though good times and bad regardless of the obstacles. I give you my hand, my heart and my love, from this day forward until death departs us," she said.
"Now you may place the rings upon each other's finger," the Pope announced.
Lloyd turned around as Genis passed him the golden ring. Inside it read "For My Perfect Angel" and on the top was a beautiful diamond. He placed it on her finger and held her hand for an extra moment. Sheena turned around and Colette passed her the other ring. The other ring was exactly the same, but inside the words read "For My Loving Hero." The ring fit perfectly on his finger like it had always been a part of him.
"Now by the power vested in me. I hereby pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride," he proclaimed.
They kissed with passion and love and the whole church could feel the happiness and peace that radiated from the couple. They broke apart and pulled her close. She had never felt so complete in her life.
"I love you Sheena," he whispered.
"I love you too," she whispered back.
"I miss you
I miss your smile"
"Hey Sheena?" asked Lloyd.
"Hmm," she muttered back. She was too distracted by her book to even look up at Lloyd. They had recently come back home from their honeymoon in Flanoir. They had spent nearly the whole trip inside their cabin due the cold weather. Not that she had minded.
"Now that we're married I was wondering," he paused. He sat up in his chair and he began to ruff his spiky brunette hair, pondering.
"Ya what's wrong?" asked Sheena.
"What's your real name?" asked Lloyd.
"Oh that," she paused. Her face was turning red and covered her face slightly with her book.
"So what's the answer?"
"Well it's kind of weird,"
"Come on tell me please," he sat beside her and gave her his biggest puppy eyes. She let out defeated sigh. He still acted little a child even after all these years.
"Well it's such a corny name,"
"Come on, I doubt that. And you did say once that the person you marry will get to know your real name," he continued to whine.
"It's Sayuri. Are you happy now?" Her face was red with embarrassment at her feminine name. She always thought her name didn't suit her tomboyish attitude.
"That's a beautiful name. You will always be my small beautiful lily," He commented and he wrapped his arms around her. She laid her head on his chest and smiled happily.
"You're starting to sound corny like my name,"
"Well it's hard to say anything else but the truth. Beside I think your name suits you very well."
"Really?"
"Yes. After all no matter what happens I will always tell you the truth,"
"And I still shed a tear
Every once in a while"
"Lloyd, this is silly," giggled Sheena, "take off this blindfold off me now." As she tried to untie the ribbon from her eyes, she was stopped by her husband's firm hands.
"Now, now sweetheart. You have to be more patient," laughed Lloyd.
"That's ironic coming from you," she teased.
"Sheena you're turning twenty-five not six. Just wait a little longer," he replied back. He placed his hands on her shoulders and guided her along the way.
"Okay," sighed Sheena. She knew that she had lost the battle anyway when she agreed to put the blindfold. She had learnt by now that Lloyd was stubborn as a mule and besides she really didn't mind. After all he did always surprise her in different ways. It was like every day with him was a new adventure.
"Okay now sit down," he explained. She sat down and tried to feel what was going on. All she knew that she was sitting on a chair and that there was a table in front of her. It made her feel slightly uneasy that she couldn't figure out her surroundings.
"Now you can take off the blindfold," he instructed. He let her hands go and quickly they reached for the knot in the back. When she untied it she was greeted once again in darkness.
"Huh?" questioned Sheena, "Lloyd where are you?"
"Happy birthday to you!" a melody of voices echoed from the darkness, "Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Sheena. Happy birthday to you!"
Suddenly the darkness disappeared and light engulfed the room. Looking around she realized she was in her kitchen. She turned around and was greeted by her friends. Lloyd came around the table holding a birthday cake with twenty-five lighted candles.
"So, do you like it?" asked Lloyd, he placed the cake on the table. She stared intently at the birthday cake. It was simply round with white icing and little star sprinkles. She knew easily that it was a job done by her husband.
"I thought I was turning twenty-five not six, but I love it so much. Thanks everyone," she smiled. It was times like this that made her feel like she didn't have a problem in the world.
"Come on Sheena it's time to blow out the candles. Make sure you wish for something good," chirped Colette. Sheena chuckled at Colette's childish antics. She was like a child in a candy store waiting to open up her first chocolate bar. Only Raine noticed the peaceful smile that Regal had as he watched the girls laugh and giggle.
"Yeah and you better make a good one," said Lloyd. He wrapped his arms around Sheena and kissed the top of her head.
"Hmm…" she thought. Taking a few moments to think of her wish she thought deeply of what she wanted. She than folded her hands and placed in front of the table. "I wish…" She took a deep breath, and blew the all twenty-five candles.
"So, what did you wish for?" he asked. His eyes sparkled with curiously.
"Can't tell," she teased, "or else it wouldn't come true."
"Not even a hint?" pleaded Lloyd.
"Not a single one. Now who wants cake?" she smiled.
"And even though it's different now
You'll still here somehow"
"Do you have to go?" she whined. She gave him her best puppy face but instead she got a chuckle from him. Her face was filled with disappointment, like a child that hadn't got what she wanted.
"Yes. But it won't be long I promise. It's a small mission and the longest it will take will be a week." He smiled. He finished strapping his twin swords together and picking up his back pack. He looked at her with assurance but still doubts traced lines in her face.
She leaned against the doorframe and looked down at the ground. The sun shone brightly outside, and it had been such a long time since it was nice like this. Everything outside just seemed so perfect, with the birds singing and children laughing. She just wished that she could be spending the day with her husband.
"Why can't I just come with you?" she asked. She didn't want her husband to leave her side. Again he only laughed at her childish attempts to keep him from leaving.
"You know that I can handle this fine and you've been sick for the last few days. Last thing I need to do is put a sick girl into a mission. And the longer you try to delay my departure the long it will take till I can come home. Besides a week will fly before you know it. Who knows you might even forget that I live here." He joked.
"Well I guess that I can't sleep in my birthday suit no more. Because it will be just too cold and lonely," she sighed. She smiled slyly, causing Lloyd's face to become beet red with embarrassment.
"I promise I'll be back," he said once more. He pulled her close and kissed her forehead, then lightly on lips. She sighed as she knew that she lost the fight and watched as he left.
"My heart won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you"
She heard a loud knocking coming from the door and she ran as quickly as she could to answer it. She could hear the sound of rain outside and knew that it would probably storm hard tonight.
"Lloyd?" yelled Sheena. She opened the door but her smiled faded away. Instead of Lloyd, Colette stood at her front step. It had looked like she had just been crying. Sheena's face quickly turned into concern.
"Colette, what's wrong? Did something happen?" asked Sheena. Colette tried to say something but the words came out empty.
"Did Zelos do something to you?" she asked. Colette only shook her head, and whispered something that Sheena couldn't hear until she heard the word Lloyd in it.
"Did something happen to Lloyd? He said that he would be back a week ago but it's been nearly two" Sheena questioned. She started to panic and gently shook Colette by the shoulder.
"I'm so sorry Sheena," she cried.
"What happened?" her voice starting to rise from worry to panic.
"Regal had gone to search for him. But when Regal found him he was poisoned and we can't cure him. He only has a few hours lefts," she cried.
"No that can't be true," she argued in a dazed state, "He said that it was an easy mission and that he would be coming back." She fell to the ground, with her hands upon her head. The rain outside seemed to pour harder to match her pain.
"Sheena, we have to hurry. He needs you the most," sobbed Colette. She dragged the dazed Sheena off the ground. They both ran quickly though the rain.
Once they arrived at Raine's home, Sheena sprinted in. Colette had explained that he was on the second floor. She ran without care, not noticing anyone else in the house. When she entered his room, she felt sick at what she saw. The strong Lloyd that she once knew was sleeping weakly in the room. His face and body was as pale as the white sheets that covered him. His brunette hair had lost its cheery bounce and now it was dull and limp. She saw the cuts on his face and everything about him seemed to have lost all life. He was like a candle that once shone bright but now had reached the end of its time.
"Lloyd?" she cried. She sat down beside his bed and held his hand tightly in hers. His eyes fluttered open and looked directly at her. He smiled brightly despite the pain he felt throughout his body. His smile was strong and determined like it always was. It was the smile that he knew that she loved. She felt saddened though as his smile was the only sign of life left in him.
"Sheena, I'm glad you're here," he coughed. His voice was weak and sounded like it was going to fade away any moment.
"I'm here Lloyd," she tried to sound calm, "Just stay strong and keep holding on for us okay? You'll get better soon." Tears flowed from her eyes as she spoke to him.
He reached for her with his hand and simply brushed aside a bang from her face and gently traced finger down her cheek.
"Sheena you don't need to lie, I know my fate. I'm just glad that you're here. So stay here with me," he whispered. She nodded slowly, tears falling down her face. She crawled on the bed and lay gently beside him. He weakly wrapped his arms around her and listened as she cried.
"Raine how much longer does he have?" asked Colette. Their group stood outside his room. Nobody wanted to enter. Everybody wanted to give Sheena as much time as possible to be with him. A blanket of sorrow and defeat covered the room and kept all hope from entering.
"Not much longer. The poison had already spread to his limbs and soon it will stop his heart. I just wish that there was something I could do," cried Raine. "Was this the best that I could do? I'm supposed to be a healer and yet I couldn't do a single thing to save Lloyd!" She shook her head with frustration and anger. She felt so useless and the guilt of letting her student down was crushing her. She could feel the tears building up in her eyes.
"Raine, it's not your fault. You did what you could and Lloyd would never hold it against you. After all no one can change fate," comforted Regal. He had long ago felt the same pain of losing someone dear and knowing the guilt she was going through. He gently wrapped his arms around her as a way to comfort the grieving teacher.
"Why is fate so cruel? To take away an innocent man from his wife and friends," spoke Zelos, his voice having lost its humor. He only spoke words laced with grief. He couldn't imagine the pain that Sheena must be going though.
Hours had passed, but it only felt like minutes to her. She lay beside him and her hand was tightly intertwined with his. Her head lay gently against his chest, and she heard every beat of his heart, every breath that he took, and every word he spoke. She wished that this could have lasted forever but she knew that it would not. She held him tighter and hoping that a miracle could be granted. That something could save her love from death's arms.
"Sheena, have I ever told you that you are a beautiful angel? That sometimes I look at you and wonder if you were sent down from heaven?" he asked. She turned to look at his face and saw that his smile was filled with pride.
"Because I know you are and I am so happy that I had you in my life. I'm so happy that I could have you as my wife, even if it was brief. You made me complete and every single moment with you, I was always happy. The last thing I want is that you don't be sad. I want you to live long and be happy and live enough for the both of us," he whispered. He kissed her on the forehead, tracing it down to her nose before he met her lips.
She broke away slowly knowing that the time was coming. She stared deeply into his eyes, not wanting them to close.
"I love you Lloyd," she cried.
"I love you too Sheena," he said so ever softly as he closed his eyes. There was a moment where time seemed to stop and a gripping pain tore in her heart. His grip on her loosened and his breath stopped. Death's arms had taken him and there was no turning back.
"Lloyd!" she yelled. All she wanted was to call him back and have him wake up and look at her with his beautiful burgundy eyes. All she wanted to do was wake up from this nightmare and have him there to comfort her.
Once they heard her scream his name, they all knew he was gone. Raine was the first to enter the room. She placed a hand on Sheena's shoulder, as she tried to comfort her.
"Sheena, I'm sorry," she said as calmly as she could, but her voice couldn't reach over the grief that Sheena had fallen into.
"I know you're in a better place yeah
But I wish that I could see your face"
"Sheena's been really depressed lately," worried Genis, "Do you think that she will be okay?"
They didn't see her around as often anymore. It felt nearly impossible to simply move on without Lloyd. They group itself had started to become more distant and everyone was grieving over his death in their own way. A month had passed since Lloyd had passed away. Sheena had refused to go to his funeral, saying that she would not stand to see her husband buried beneath dirt.
"I don't know. It takes a lot of strength to rise again once you lose a loved one. Some people find their strength through anger and seek revenge. Others find strength inside them and help others so none will suffer like they did. And some just become hollow inside," Presea spoke with wisdom beyond her physical years. The pair continued to walk under the starry skies, when suddenly they heard footsteps coming behind them. Turning around they saw a frantic Raine running towards them.
"You're late. Presea and I started to walk over to Sheena's house and we thought that you forgot," whined Genis, as his older sister approached them. Once she reached them she stopped and tried to catch her breath, before giving Genis a smack on the head.
"First off. I was the one who thought of bringing her supper tonight. Besides I wasn't late you guys just left fifteen minutes earlier," argued Raine. Presea couldn't help but laugh at the siblings.
"Well I'm the one who cooked the meal so you shouldn't be complaining in the first place," he argued back.
The two continued their fight until they reached Sheena's home. They noticed that the lights were off, even thought it was already dark out.
"Hmm, I wonder why the lights are off. Maybe she's gone," questioned Genis. He let out a deep sigh at the disappointment at his wasted effort.
"Maybe she just wanted some time alone," suggested Presea
"Well then good job Raine. Due to the fact that you were the one who planned this surprise supper, but didn't even consider the fact that she might be gone tonight. Leaving us with all this wasted food," complained Genis.
She didn't answer to him, but instead she walked towards the front door, and knocked. Everyone waited for awhile, but no one answered the door. Raine then placed her ear against the door.
"What are you doing now?" asked Genis, he was still clearly upset about the supper.
"Be quiet Genis," she barked. Her voice was sharp and it worried him.
"What's wrong?" concerned Genis. He didn't get an answered, as Raine began to knock her fists harder against the door.
"Sheena! Sheena! Open this door at once or we'll break in," she shouted.
Genis and Presea grew more worried. They both approached and stood by Raine and copied her actions by knocking on the door too.
"Something's wrong. I heard sounds inside and they were too loud to be just a rat," explained Raine, "Genis break down this door with your magic."
He nodded, and everyone backed away from the door. He started to chant and a red inscription circled around him. Presea just stood there as she watched, knowing that she was useless without her weapon by her side.
"Fire ball!" he shouted.
Within a few seconds the door was engulfed in flames and turned into black ashes. They ran inside quickly, each person searching in a different area of the home. Suddenly a scream was heard from the kitchen. They knew instantly that it was Raine's voice. Genis and Presea both ran quickly into the kitchen, but when they arrived their faces grew pale. The first thing they saw was the blood and pale face Sheena laying on the kitchen floor. Blood flowed freely from the cuts she had upon her wrists. Raine was at her side trying desperately to cover her wounds and stop the flow of the blood.
"Genis don't just stand there; help me lift her up onto the couch. Presea run to my house and grab my medicine and staff," instructed Raine. They nodded and quickly went to do as they were told. Raine pulled at her sleeve and ripped it into strips in order to create a rough band aid. She noted that Sheena's breathing was shallow and labored, and her face was pale as snow. She had lost enough blood that she was in a critical condition; only treatment from healing arts could save her now
"Hurry Presea please," said Raine, "we can't lose Sheena too."
Worry clouded the siblings' eyes as they watched their friend struggle for life. In a month their whole world had changed with the death of Lloyd. The once fun loving and happy Sheena had turned to a widow with no hope or reason to stay alive.
"Lloyd, why did you leave? I just want to see you," moaned Sheena in her sleep.
They wished that they had seen it earlier. She had lost the love of her life to cruel fate. Her only light had been taken away and she was willing to do anything to be reunited with him. She was willing to do anything to see him, even at the cost her of life.
"Sheena," sighed Raine. She knew that Sheena must have been going through hell without Lloyd beside her. Raine felt guilt covering her like a blanket. Why had she not seen this earlier? Could she have stopped her from resorting to this? Genis looked at Sheena with worried eyes. Why did his best friend have to leave?
They heard footsteps enter the room and saw Presea and Regal as they entered the room with her supplies. Raine quickly grabbed her staff from Presea and began chanting her spell.
"Healing circle!" she chanted.
Light glowed around Sheena and colour soon returned to her face. Sheena's physical wounds started fading away as the light around her disappeared. Raine knew the physical wounds would be gone but those in her heart would not fade as easily.
"Genis and Presea put her into bed now and I'll start boiling medicine to help regain the blood she lost," said Raine.
They nodded and Genis gently lifted her and carried her upsides towards her room. Presea followed right after him. When they entered her room they felt the loneliness that lay thick in the room. The bed that was meant for two stood quietly in the center. Lloyd's clothes had remained on the floor, untouched, and the curtains stayed closed refusing to let any light come in. The aura of the room gave them chills down their spines and opened wounds that never healed over the loss of their friend.
"How did you get here?" asked Raine.
"I was going to come visit you but I saw Presea running towards your home. She told me what had happened and I helped her find your staff and medicine," answered Regal.
"Oh I see," she said, "Thank you,"
"Don't you remember? She's my friend too," he told. She nodded and without another word they both started to clean up the mess. She couldn't help but be sickened by the sight of the blood that lay on the floor.
"I wish I was here earlier, I noticed she was depressed but didn't think that she would go that far," she blamed herself. She threw the blood stain cloth in the sink and tried to keep the tears from falling. He came behind her and wrapped his strong arms around her body. She was surprised at first of the sudden gesture but soon fell at ease in his arms.
"Raine, it is not your fault. You must stop blaming yourself for the things that have happened. You can only change the future, not the past," comforted Regal. His voice was like a lullaby, comforting her like a child.
Sheena opened her eyes as the sunlight shone in her eyes. She blinked a few times, as her eyes adjusted to the brightness. She felt confused, as she gently rose up from her bed. Looking briefly around she realized, she was in her room.
"How did I get here?"She whispered. Her voice was weak and tired despite the sleep she had. All she remembered last night was being in the kitchen and blood. Blood that had belong to her.
"So you're awake now," said Raine, "You gave us such a heart attack last night. Do you remember what happened?" She had entered her room to check on Sheena and was surprised that she was awake.
Sheena only nodded her head, not bothering to look directly at Raine. Instead she stared at the closed curtains, lost in her own thoughts of last night. She felt ashamed that her friends had seen what she had done. She had hoped that they wouldn't have found her until she was with her love again.
"Why did you do it?" asked Raine.
Sheena slowly sat up and looked at her friend briefly. Raine had done her job well, and there weren't any scars left on her wrists. Looking at her wrists she remembered her hasty actions. Did she feel regrets? She honestly didn't know what to think anymore.
"I," she sighed, "I- Just wanted to be with Lloyd."
She seemed so calm about the issue and it frustrated Raine. She felt like she was talking to the shadow of her friend. The lighthearted Sheena had disappeared and now was replaced with a ghost of her former self. She gently took Sheena by the shoulders.
"Sheena. If Lloyd saw you doing this, he would be so disappointed in you. He wouldn't ever have wanted this. He wanted you to live for both him and yourself. You do know that right?" asked Raine.
"But I just want to see him. His eyes, his smile, everything about him, I just want to be with him," she shouted, "I don't want to be alone anymore."
She was on the verge of tears as she spoke. All her emotions came like a wave to the surface. There was a moment of silence before Raine pulled her into a hug and Sheena cried.
"Sheena, you have to stay strong. If you left, you would leave behind friends who care about you. You promised Lloyd that you would live on, for him," reassured Raine.
Sheena let go of her, and started to wipe away the tears. Deep inside she knew that Raine was right but it still couldn't fill the void. To her nothing could replace the happiness she had when she was with him. When she was with him, the darkness of her past stayed away and she felt no regrets.
"And Sheena you have so much more going for you in your life," explained Raine.
"What do you mean?" asked Sheena.
She sat up straight and brought her knees close to her chest. She was ready herself for a lecture. It didn't matter to her anymore; no amount of talking could get her out of her depression. It felt like every moment was a nightmare and the only release was through death.
"You're pregnant," answered Raine.
"What?" exclaimed Sheena. Her eyes widened with surprise and shock.
She was completely thrown off guard with the news. Every feeling of sadness and death slowly faded away with each passing moment. It seemed like a new light had shown through her madness and gave hope for a new life.
"Yes, I was surprised that I didn't catch the earlier symptoms. You being pregnant can explain why for the last few weeks that you have been sick," explained Raine, "However the miracle was that you didn't have a miscarriage last night. When I looked through your house last night I could tell that you haven't been eating properly and your stunt last night could have killed you both. It's a good thing that miracles do happen. But I believe that it wasn't just a miracle. I think that Lloyd was watching you from above and protecting you."
The despair in Sheena's eyes faded and for the first time in weeks she smiled. No further words were exchanged between them. Raine knew she could leave Sheena alone to think over her actions. She knew Sheena was once again ready to stand on her own two feet. Now that she had a reason the live again.
"Lloyd," she whispered. That was all she had said before lying back down. She let sleep consume her. This time however; the bed didn't feel so empty.
"I know you're where you need to be
Even though it's not here with me"
A tiny cry could be heard thought out the room. It was the most beautiful sound she had ever heard. The pain she had gone through moments ago was nothing compared to this beautiful cry.
"Congratulation Mrs. Irving. It's a little baby girl," announced the doctor. The doctor gently took the infant and wrapped her in a pink blanket. The crying continued as the doctor brought her over to the new mother.
"Here," smiled the doctor.
She handed Sheena the little bundle. Tears went down her face, as she held her little baby girl for the first time.
"Hello," she whispered, "My little girl. I love you so much."
She gently rocked her back and forth. The baby stopped crying and opened her burgundy eyes. She looked directly at her mother as if she knew whose arms she belonged too.
"Lloyd. She has my eyes but I know that she will have your smile," she said to herself quietly.
She felt so restless in the hospital room. The nurses had come and moved her to a different room and they had taken her daughter for a bath. The room was too quiet for her taste; the only other sound that could be heard was the stupid damn clock on the wall. She laid her head down and forced her eyes closed. She tried once again to rest, but failed once more. She sighed not knowing what to do. Suddenly she heard knocking coming from the door.
"Come in!" shouted Sheena.
"Sheena, my dear," yelled Zelos.
He came in giving her a quick hug. Moments later Genis, Colette, Presea entered her room too. Then she heard running and she looked towards her door as Raine and Regal arrived later than the rest. She noticed everyone but Zelos carried a present.
"Congratulations Sheena," smiled Raine, as she entered the room with Regal.
They both placed their presents on the table and stood with the rest of the group. Sheena noticed that Raine was fidgeting ever so slightly and kept glancing over at Regal.
"Thank you everyone," smiled Sheena.
"Well we all brought you gifts but Zelos had his delivered to your house," explained Genis. One by one they each placed their gifts on the table.
"Where's the baby?" chirped Colette. Colette's bright smile made Sheena smile wider. Everyone gathered around Sheena's bed waiting for the news.
"The nurses took her for a bath. She'll be back soon," replied Sheena.
No sooner did she say that, another knock came from the door. Everyone turned their heads anxiously.
"Come in," called Sheena.
A nurse came in, rolling a small cradle with the sleeping baby in. She rolled the cradle next to Sheena's bed. Everyone quickly gathered around the cradle and their eyes grew wide watching the infant sleep. It was so hard to believe that such happiness came from such a small creature. The nurse gently lifted the baby girl and handed her to her mother. The little girl woke and opened her burgundy eyes and wiggled slightly in her mother's arms.
"I'll be back later to check up on her," said the nurse.
Sheena nodded at the nurse. She left without another word, leaving the group to admire the little child.
"Awe she's so cute and tiny," chirped Colette.
"She's so beautiful. And if she grows up to look like you, I bet that she'll have to beat the boys off her with a stick," joked Zelos.
Sheena glared evilly at Zelos giving him a chill down his back, but a smile appeared on her face. Some things never did change over the years.
"Yeah, Zelos you better not be one of the boys, when she gets to that age," added Genis. His comment was cut short as Raine punched him in the head.
"Well I'm very insulted, the only girl for me is my perfect little beauty Colette," he said happily. He wrapped his arms around Colette and everyone in the room laughed. They all knew that he had changed greatly. His flirty comments and player attitude had faded away when Colette entered his life.
"She reminds me of her father," stated Regal.
The little girl yawed in her mother's arms, no longer interested in the world around her. They watched as she fell back into a gentle slumber.
"Yeah, she's like her father," whispered Sheena, "She has his hair and his smile." Her voice trailed off to barely a whisper as sadness masked her voice.
"Have you thought of a name?" asked Presea, trying to bring Sheena out of her unhappiness. Sheena's sad face faded and a smile appeared. She brought the baby closer to her and looked at her.
"Yes, I have and I know that Lloyd would have wanted this too," replied Sheena, "Her name's going to be Martel. Martel Irving. A child symbolizing new hope."
The baby woke up once again from the noise. She stared at her mother with wonderment as Sheena gently rocked her back and forth.
"Raine, do you want to hold her?" asked Sheena.
Raine nodded and gently took the child from Sheena's arms. She remembered this feeling. It was the same feeling she had when she first held Genis as a baby. It made her feel happy and at peace.
"Welcome to our world, Martel," said Raine.
Sheena sighed as she watched the group play with Martel. It was still hard to believe that she had just become a mother. She felt like she finally had a purpose after the many months she sat in depression. Everyone busily watched the child in the cradle, leaving Sheena to have a moment of peace.
"Sheena,"
A quiet voice called to her, and she knew that it couldn't have come from anyone in this room. She turned around and looked through the window in her room. Moonlight shone through the window and outside she saw a man. He stood by an old oak tree and his brown hair, crimson eyes and pale complexion shone in the moonlight. A smile was on his face as he looked at her lovingly.
"You did great Sheena. Take good care of yourself and our daughter. Remember that I will always love you both," echoed his voice.
His voice echoed his few parting words. Tears ran down her face as the man slowly disappeared. She desperately wanted to call to him and beg him to stay but her voice was silent. She continued to stare at the spot that he had stood just moments ago.
"What's wrong?" asked Genis, when he had turned around and noticed her tears.
"Nothing," she replied.
She never told anyone of who she saw or what had happened. She knew that they wouldn't ask and that was the way she wanted it to be. It was the final time that she saw him and she knew that she would never see him again.
May the fourth was the day that he had died. On every May fourth she would come to visit the graveyard. She never came any other day of the year. She always would bring along her daughter and some flowers. Many of her friends would visit his grave occasionally but never on this same day. Everyone knew that this was the day that belonged to Sheena. This was her day to cry and remember her past.
I miss you
I miss your smile
And I still shed a tear every once in a while
And even though it's different now
You're still here somehow
"Sheena," spoke Presea, "You've been here for quite a few hours. Martel grew very worried about you." She came up to her and placed her hand on her shoulder, waking Sheena out of her thoughts. Sheena looked at her with tear filled eyes, as she slowly got up from the ground. She tried to wipe away her tears as she looked to see her other friends had also come to retrieve her. Regal, Raine, and Genis stood behind Presea. She looked again and saw Martel hidden behind Raine. The little girl looked worried and ran to into her mother's arms.
"Where are Colette and Zelos?" asked Sheena. She collected herself and picked up her daughter. Martel laid her head on her mother's shoulder and felt relief in finally being back in her arms.
"Well that's the reason we came looking for you. Colette when into labor a few hours ago," said Raine.
"What? Why didn't you tell me earlier? Come on, we better get to the hospital," exclaimed Sheena.
They nodded in agreement and headed towards the exit. Everyone exited but Sheena stood at the silver gates. It would be another year before she would come back again and she wanted to take an extra moment before she left. Every time she left the gates she felt a sense of unease.
"Goodbye Lloyd," she whispered.
She quickly ran to catch up with the rest of the group. Nobody asked why she stopped. They all knew the answer inside their heart and they couldn't blame her.
My heart won't let you go
And I need you to know
I miss you
"Let's see, by the looks of this, Colette Wilder is currently stationed in room twenty-two on the second floor," answered the nurse.
"Thank you," replied Regal.
The nurse's face grew red at the handsome man's voice, but all lost colour when Raine gave her a death glare. Regal sighed and led Raine away from the poor nurse.
"Hey! That's the same room I stayed in too, when I was in the hospital with Martel. You got to admit that is so weird. Well maybe Raine or Presea will be the next ones to that room the next time," laughed Sheena.
Both Raine and Presea's face grew deep red knowing exactly what Sheena was implying. Martel looked at the adults with curiously but she was more than happy that her mom's smile had returned. Everyone was joyful despite the feeling of coldness and sickness that emitted from hospital halls.
When they entered the room they saw the picture perfect family. It was the family that Sheena had dreamed of with Lloyd. Colette was lying in the bed and inside her arms was a little baby. Zelos sat beside her proudly admiring the bundle of joy. Everyone gathered around the new family.
"Oh my goodness Colette she is so adorable," cooed Sheena. The child was still asleep in Colette's arm. Martel leaned over in her mother's arms to look closer at the tiny baby. Her eyes widen looking at the small infant. She had never seen a child so small and it fascinated her.
"Actually she's not a she. In fact she is actually a he. Basically he's a boy," announced Zelos proudly.
Everyone stared in shock at the latest news. Colette let out a small laugh at the faces of her friends.
"Yeah, the doctors had made a mistake during my last check up," explained Colette, "Poor little thing will have pink themed stuff for awhile. Even his little clothes will be pink for awhile until we can order some new stuff."
Everyone laughed at the statement expect for Zelos who became very offended. He crossed his arms and looked angrily at everyone.
"What's wrong with the colour pink? You know what? Real men wear pink! Now he will look more like his father," shouted Zelos.
"Yeah but hopefully he won't be flirting with every girl when he gets older," commented Genis, "or anything that wears a dress.'
"Hey! I told you before Colette is my perfect little angel," argued Zelos.
"Geez, back to the fighting already?" sighed Sheena.
"Mommy? What is the baby's name?" asked Martel.
"Yeah, what is this little guy's name?" questioned Sheena.
The couple went silent for a moment. Sheena wondered what was worrying them. The couple looked at each other before answering.
"Sheena we wanted to ask you if it's okay to name him," paused Zelos "Lloyd?"
Silence swallowed the room and Sheena looked to the ground. She let Martel back down and took in a deep sigh. She walked closer to the couple as she spoke.
"Today on May fourth will be the seventh year that I lived without my husband, Lloyd. But today is also another day. It is a day of birth. The birth of this baby boy. Both life and death happened on this same day and time didn't stop for either. And I know that Lloyd would have wanted this," said Sheena.
Everyone in the room paid a moment of respect for their fallen friend.
"So let this be a new day and welcome the newest Lloyd in our group," smiled Sheena, "I know Lloyd would have been honored."
Colette smiled happily at the approval and Zelos gave Sheena a hug. She felt that a heavy weight had been lifted finally and new strength was found. She smiled at Martel and everyone felt a sense of relief.
"Welcome little Lloyd. Welcome to the family," whispered Colette.
Colette cradled the baby in her arms. A feeling of love surrounded the room. Martel pulled on her mommy's ribbon and Sheena lifted her up once again. She backed away from the rest of the group and stood silently by the window. She looked out at the spot where he last stood.
"My heart won't let you go and I need you to know, I miss you," she sang softly.
The wind blew through the trees outside and everything was lit by the moon.
"I miss you Lloyd. But I'll be strong and now I know what I live for. I live for you, Martel and all of our friends. Today is a day of rebirth and it's time that I move on. No more crying, no more sadness. I love you and I always will," she prayed.
No one but Martel heard what she had said. It was for the best because now Sheena no longer cried for him. She lived on for her daughter, herself and for him.
"Life is a circle. It never ends. On a day of death and a new life is born."
The End
AN: This is my first fanfiction so please review! Thanks for reading, and once again many thanks to Link-luvr for a awesome beta reading job.