Hi everybody! I finally decided to translate the first chapter of my fanfic Les Profs, (instead of finishing my next chapter, woops)I hope it's not too bad ^.^
Disclaimer:
Before everything else, I must credit Saharu-chan and her delightful fanfic, Les profs (which you can read on here if you understand French and know Saint Seiya. It's worth it, believe me) for inspiring me this one. I also thank her for allowing me to transpose her idea into the world of Hakuouki and for her patience during the long months of rewriting these chapters necessitated...
So, I own nothing at all, everything is the rightful property of Idea Factory and of Saharu-chan.
Clarifications on this story:
Each chapter will be dedicated to one teacher in the form of a "resume", following this order: Hijikata, Sannan, Itou, Soji, Shinpachi, Saito, Inoue, Heisuke, Harada, Yamazaki, Shimada, Ibuki, Chizuru and finally Kondo and Serizawa. I haven't planned to make chapters dedicated to the demons but they will be mentioned. You will have to guess the function of each of the guys (Chizuru is quite obvious ^^) until their chapter comes so have fun! :)
I first thought of this story as a mean to occupy my little brother during last summer and a few ideas are directly from him (I will give him credit when it'll happen) He mostly helped me assigning a subject to every guy (which is probably why some are weird eheh)
Most of the times, I only make references understandable through Hakuouki (game and anime) but note that I use as an inspiration the game, anime, musicals and Sweet School Life. I won't make any references to Shinkai/Kyoto winds however to avoid spoilers.
I'll try to explain things that might be obscure (especially if not from the game or anime) but don't hesitate to ask if I forget some!
I think that's it (it's a bit long sorry ha!), so enjoy your reading!
SAFETY NOTICIES
Enclosed: A few notes concerning the teachers of Shinsengumi university.
The present form was written by members of the Students Council, specifically by the secretary, with the kind contribution of the president and the vice-president. They hope the provided information will help you approach your scholarship in our splendid university in total serenity.
Pay honour to whom honour is due, let's start with our beloved homeroom teacher.
The demonic poet
A) M. T. N. (Minimum Technique Needed):
-Name: Hijikata Toshizo
-Nicknames: Toshi (note that its use is strictly limited to his very close intimates. i.e. our benevolent deputy director and the music teacher), the demon (used by pretty much everybody)
-Subject: Literature (are you sure? I double-checked). More accurately, poetry. Exclusively. (Thought so too. But why should we complain? He does it so well! Can I get the pen back?) If you want to study novels, ask the history teacher. And for theatre… well, we've got an option.
-Anecdote: His favourite food is takuwan (reputable sources affirm that he could eat a whole bucket of it… Nature is full of mysteries) If you ever host a classroom diner, remember it.
-In one sentence: Since he is your homeroom teacher and teach an important subject, he might give you a feeling of being omnipresent, to the rest of the teaching community detriment (rest assure, it's worth it!) Unfortunately, there is no changing it so just tell yourself that he is probably the one it annoys the most! (That's...more than one sentence actually).
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B) Biographical details:
1. How to recognise him in a hallway?
-Height: 172 cm / 5'08" ft (you do not wish to know by what means this information has been obtained…)
-Colour code: #16161E and #77507C
(…)
(…)
(Are you serious? Well, more or less. Of course, it depends on the lightning, the viewing angle, the selected sample, the… Ok, you are serious. You know what? I'll do it myself. Dear Lord…)
Long, raven-like hair, as dark as his everyday mood, so perfectly black and smooth that you will often be tempted to touch it, just to make sure it's real. (I'm begging you not to. If only for your own survival. And his personal comfort.) Mysterious and magnetic amethyst eyes… (my colour code was much more accurate and objective. And less expansive.) You can as of now join the club whose activities are devoted to ascertain whether this is his natural colour of if he wears contact lens (or join any other club dedicated to the glory of this dear teacher's physique).
-Particularities worth noting: Hijikata-sensei traditionally combs his hair into a long ponytail but when summer and its heat comes, it is not unusual to see him adopt a more refreshing (and even more seductive. Yes, I assure you, it's possible) haircut.
Highly intriguing and interesting phaenomenon, his hair will sometimes turn white and his eyes red without any warning… (#FEF6E3 and #FF1B16 more accurately) The causes behind such a mutation are still unknown but word of advice: when encountering this situation, try to keep a low profile. You'll understand later.
-General opinion: Apparently, some think he's as pretty as an actor. Let's say it depends which actor. (I'd have heard everything…)
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2. More or less typical proceeding of a class
-Better be warned now, Hijikata-sensei is not our most easy-going teacher. If you want to spend a class in total serenity you must avoid at all cost any misconduct, starting with nattering since our dear literature teacher hates being interrupted in his poems recitation. (Besides, why would you interrupt him? You should enjoy the charm of his beautiful and deep voice while he declaims poetry. Except if you want to find out why people call him "the demon", of course. Friendly advice: you do not want to know).
-As for the content of his classes… I hope you like poetry and more specifically haikus because this is approximately the only thing you will study with him. (Give him a year and you will be able to fluently speak in haikus. And believe me, it'll impress in high society! But not so much at an exam instead of an essay, unfortunately. I'll get back to it later.)
-The class may consist in poetry recitation but that does not allow you to fall asleep. If I were you, I would frame this advice to be sure to remember it.
-Moreover, you must be informed that Hijikata-sensei is also your beloved homeroom teacher. You will therefore see him, aside from literature lessons, during "homeroom sessions" (for what it's worth… I mean, most of the time he just uses this hour for his own classes instead. Coming to it). Despite his many complaints about the number of papers to fill, he flawlessly deals with the administrative aspect of his function. However, regarding personal accompaniment of his students… Concretely, he doesn't give a damn. (I'd rather say he has other concerns…)
-If you have familial issues and he knows one of your parents, preferably your father, and on top of that if you are a cute and helpful girl, through constant efforts and patience, he might end up taking an interest in you (note that this case is extremely rare). If you have none of this, give up now. Hijikata-sensei seems to consider that everything aside from his classes does not concern him. Even what's part of his classes actually. Yes, he is a bit narrow-minded but unfortunately, I don't think he will ever change his way of functioning.
-Do not hope for any support from the direction either. Indeed, if our director and Hijikata-sensei do not have the most tender love for each other (what an euphemism! I once heard them exchange death threats!), our venerated director cares even less about your personal problems than our dear literature teacher (why are you always so negative? They just have more important matters to take care of! And I'm the one saying euphemisms…).
-As for our benevolent deputy director, he deeply cares about the happiness of every students but he also happens to be Hijikata-sensei's best friend (remember the nicknames at the beginning of our notice). He thus won't listen to any criticism about him and will even less relay them to him (that's a shame because the deputy director seems to me like one of the only people capable of making Hijikata-sensei change his methods). So, suffer in silence and start making haikus, that's the only advice I can give you.
-Hijikata-sensei still is, however, an extremely pleasurable teacher (aesthetically speaking or more generally?) who cares deeply about our dear school reputation. He will sometimes get carried away by waves of inspiration leading to epic speech about the beauty of the educational mission that will bring tears in your eyes and make you wish to embrace the professorial carrier with closed eyes (for want of embracing something else), which greatly explains his success among the students and professors.
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3. And concretely, for the exams?
-As we previously said, literature classes only consist in haikus reading, unlike exams which, for their part, scrupulously follow official programs… i.e. anything except haikus. So obviously, with such a restricted field of study (are you going to reproach him being as passionate about something?), your chances of success at the exams are pretty low. Do not even bother arguing that he never taught you anything else, you'll be wasting your breath (don't worry, you'll get used to it, just like everything else…).
-But to compensate, you will get to study erotica poems! Didn't the direction forced him to stop because they didn't think it was very acceptable? Ah yes damn… Too bad, you won't have known the mad years of his youth… Which might not be such a bad thing actually.
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4. What to avoid, what to favour
-You will notice before long that he will sometimes inadvertently read out loud some of his own compositions. He himself claims that it is not great literature, rightfully so (that's because you know nothing of it! …Anyway) but friendly advice: do not make any comments. Even constructive ones. (Especially constructive ones!) He will probably be very embarrassed and I can assure you he will not forget this humiliation. Which you will be able to observe during the end-of-terms exams or class council. (Remember, beloved homeroom teacher, friend with our benevolent deputy director, etc.)
-One last thing to stay alive: absolutely never upset him, especially during his quiet time. Cigarette break is sacred (and frequent). So are discussions with the cute nurse. And those with our benevolent deputy director. Or any, as long as he does not explicitly ask you to speak up. While we're at it, never mention in front of him our rival university, Onis university, especially its antiques civilisations teacher. Survival matter.
-If you ever see, during a time of irritation, his hair turns white and his eyes red, run. Fast. And far. You can also try to get the cute nurse. She will probably accept to help you and with some luck, murders will be avoided. If not, prayers are your friends. All of this can seem odd but it has been lived and experimented by each of the member present here. To understand the reasons behind this disruption, one must look into a very old clash between several of our teachers and those of the Onis university. It would seem that…
-Wait, I'll tell it. The conflict I am going to talk about was one of our university's history major events and it must be properly told (too kind). It is said a storm was rumbling during this gruesome day and the thunder's furious roars seemed to all a prelude to the drama that was about to take place. Lightings in the sky… (just a reminder that we have limited ink budget so it would be a good thing if you could abbreviate the introduction. Plus, there wasn't any storm at all, the sun was radiant! I'm setting up the atmosphere, you bunch of killjoy. Well set it up fast). In short, a sinister event was plotted out. And indeed, while the music teacher and the cute nurse were peacefully chatting, they were interrupted by mysterious men with a suspicious affiliation to our dear musician teacher (weren't they ancient member of his orchestra or something? Yes, they were, those traitors! Such a lack of respect for their elder! They will answer for this!) And just as a somewhat stormy debate was engaged, came at this moment the antique civilisations teacher of Onis university. For this sworn enemy of our establishment (I'm not going to complain about his numerous irruptions though) has been trying for years to steal from us our cute nurse (well, actually he's trying to convince her to work full-time at the Onis instead of keeping a part-time at Shinsengumi university and at theirs). Anyway, as usual, it was a traitorous attack.
-Hijikata-sensei would have arrived at this moment and, being particularly attached to our dear nurse, would have violently come at his rival, sacrificing one of his most beautiful poetry's anthologies (don't laugh, I can assure you that thrown at full power at someone's face, it can hurt them pretty bad. What a cool way of fighting!) Things quickly degenerated, a Sumerian dictionary flew by and knocked out the unlucky biology teacher who was passing by (that's one rumour among others, there are many others versions of the tale. Let me talk dear god!), and, for a still unknown reason, Hijikata-sensei's hair suddenly turned white and his eyes red (dire day if there ever were one…) (remember the colour codes). As for the causes behind this sudden colouration, of course I've got my own theories. First, I think it might be a symptom of…
-In the end, the philosophy teacher of the Onis managed to calm everyone but damage has already been done and the colouration symptom still manifests itself from times to times, depending on his mood. (Hey, and my theories? Ink budget, remember.) One must note that our beloved homeroom teacher took advantage of the situation and made one of his most remarkable speech on the beauty of the professorial mission's and the necessity to never give up, even when things get harsh. (He's always boosted by the presence of a rival) (that's funny because I didn't remember the same thing from his speech… That's because you don't know how to listen to him).
-Anyway, in case of white hair, keep a low profile and wait for it to pass. Or call for the cute nurse, your best friend in case of trouble. And above all, run the moment a Onis teacher is in sight.
-As for what to favour… err… don't do any of the above and keep a low profile, it'll save you from most troubles. And remember to buy takuwan for classroom diner!
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Conclusion:
One kind of teacher you won't see very often, devoted body and soul to our university and to a restrictive branch of his field but who might still have a lot to learn regarding human relationships. Which can be seen as regrettable for a homeroom teacher…
Notes:
Takuwan: I am going to quote shinsengumi-no-makoto on this one since this is where I got the idea in the first place:
"One of Hijikata's favorite foods was takuwan (pickled radish), especially the ones made by his Hashimoto relatives. Once while visiting with them he praised it so much that the master of the house told him he could take home as many as he thought he would need. This made Hijikata very happy and he took the whole bucket with him! (Note that takuwan is said to have a very strong smell and that the bucket was probably fairly big since the incident was remembered.)"
You can also note that in one of Reimeiroku's OVA, Soji ads takuwan to the meal he cooks for Hijikata…
It was obvious to me and my little brother that Hijikata had to be a literature teacher, especially since it's more or less what he does in SSL. Also, homeroom teacher because I thought it was funny and he is vice-commander after all. He also smokes in the game (according to one scene at least) and it is engraved in my brain that Hijikata in a modern AU would be smoking (thank you Mikipeach). I mostly alluded to it because of Gintama and Peacemaker Kurogane though… (pmk!Hijikata haunts my dreams tbh)
As for the colour code… it's a bit silly but it made me laugh so yeah, here it is. I used officials CG to extract the colour but to quote our dear secretary, it is obvious that the colour varies a lot depending on many criteria. I just made this for the joke, not to use as a reference.
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Do not hesitate to leave a review, especially if you have any questions or suggestions for the next chapters! (Or remarks on my English since it's not my first language! Please correct me where I'm wrong!)
I hope this chapter at least made you smile a bit :)
I'll try to update this story regularly but I tend not to promise anything (given how my productivity varies a lot depending on my health, which is not so good these days anyway) See you next time! :D
Edit: I forgot to add but I base the height on my official artbook, which gives it in cm. For ft, I used the one given on the hakuouki-hakumyu wikia.