Hey everyone! I've always thought there was more to Coach Hedge than someone who provided comic relief, and I also always wondered why the Coach liked war so much. Hence, this one-shot. I've been working on it for a week now, and I'm insanely proud of it (and not just cause it's going to be the first Coach Hedge-centric story in the PJO section). So... enjoy!

War

Contrary to popular belief, Coach Hedge had never been on a real quest before. He was a protector, after all. The job was simple- find the kid, kill some monsters, and get back to Camp. Hedge was never to get attached to any of these kids- he was merely a bridge between worlds, shipping children to a different place.

But once in a while, there would come a time where he would find a kid that he couldn't help but like. It was usually when the kid lived far away; the journey would be so long that Hedge would bond with the kid. And then, the second the kid got to camp, Hedge was discarded as the child learned more about his new world- a world that had no place for a strange satyr.

Granted, sometimes there would be kids that would talk to him for a while after they arrived, but they all eventually forgot. After all, they were demigods. He was a satyr. There was no room for friendship.

So then Coach Hedge began to turn more to war. War was abrasive and rash and stupid- much like the Coach himself. War became his friend, as person after person abandoned him. War was the sole confidant of the Coach, and he now took pleasure in war, even though it was a terrible thing to take joy in.

But the main reason Hedge turned to war was because it was so opposite to what he had grown up hearing. All of his life he had learned to protect. War destroyed everything in its way. They were so opposite that it soothed the Coach, reassured him every time another demigod took off. War became his life, and protecting became a thing of the past.

And then he was shipped off to the Wilderness School, to look after a bunch of snot-faced delinquents. But in the Coach's mind, they weren't delinquents. War entered his mind yet again, and now they were soldiers, and he was their captain. His job was to push them past their limits, to train them until sweat dripped from every inch of their skin.

But then he meets the demigods. The ones who make the tiny part of his mind that still believes in protecting slowly invade the rest of his brain. The boy he doesn't like much. The girl, however, he knows more about. And his protector instincts kick in, and all of the sudden these two are his responsibility and he won't let anything happen to them.

And then the stupid storm spirit whisks him away during the fight on the Grand Canyon, and he failed his mission. The two kids he had secretly grown fond of are God knows where, along with that third boy, the one who speaks in Latin.

It's enough to drive the poor Coach mad as he stays in Medea's lair, his body frozen but his mind still racing. Gaea speaks to him in his mind, trying to persuade him to join her. She tempts him with war, all of those images that make his heartbeat accelerate as he watched the thing that has controlled his life for the last twenty or so years.

Only this time, he doesn't get the same pleasure out of it as he normally does.

Then those kids free him, and he just wants to scream at them for all of the trouble they've gotten themselves into, but he's too busy worrying about what King Midas will do to them. But then Jason makes him go outside, and then the two others get turned into gold. And Coach Hedge just wants to scream yet again as Piper sits there, practically dying, as he tries to remember how to perform nature magic.

But he can't. It's hidden under all of the memories of war.

So they end up defeating a giant, and the Coach gets a new girlfriend in the process. She's quiet and shy- the exact opposite of him- and she doesn't like war in the slightest. But war is still such a big part of his life that he can't stop himself from liking it, so he just keeps quiet about it when he's around her.

And then he's chosen to chaperone the seven demigods on the Argo II, and his life gets turned upside-down again. He tries to give the kids their space, he really does, but when everyone's all crammed onto one boat (no matter how big said boat may be), he can't help but bond even more with all of them. And now they're all more important to him than any other kids he's ever helped protect. They're not just charges anymore- these kids are his family.

But still, his love for war rages on, trying to topple his love for these kids. So then he hides, watching TV in his cabin as he tries to take his mind off of these kids he shouldn't be getting attached to.

Oh, sure, he tries being mean to them. Hades, he even grounded Annabeth after her and Percy were caught together in the stables. But internally, Coach Hedge was trying to hold back his laughter at the utter ridiculousness of the scenario. Here they are, in the middle of a quest, and those two go and cuddle on a glass door. But he can't let them see that, so he goes back to being overdramatic about the whole ordeal.

It doesn't work.

And then, when everything's finally starting to settle down and the statue's been loaded onto the ship, those two go and fall into Taratarus. Coach Hedge, like everyone else, blames himself. He was responsible for them. And he let them fall.

But finally he realizes who's really responsible for it all. War. The same thing he's been relying on for the past two decades sent to of his "family members" straight into the pits of Taratarus. War made so many people die. War isn't fun, or an adventure. War is something scary, something incredibly dangerous.

War had been steering him wrong this whole time.

So Coach Hedge gathered up all of the magazines and DVD's and the little collectible figurines that had anything to do with war and dumped them all overboard. He kept his baseball bat, though. The end of his addiction to war didn't necessarily mean the end of his favourite weapon.

"Um, Coach?" Leo walked up to him, a puzzled look on his face. "What are you doing?"

"My job, Valdez."

And although Leo still looks confused, this statement makes perfect sense to the Coach. He's a protector, not an soldier.

And for once, that statement puts Gleeson Hedge at perfect ease.

Reviews would be much appreciated, as would CC.

Thanks!

~Jace =)