Ways to Lower Your Psycho-Pass
Summary: The team researches ways to lower stress and come upon a surprising observation. Apparently, owning a pet ranks as one of the most therapeutic ways to lower a person's psycho-pass. "You do realize that this cat is only raising my crime-coefficient?" "Ginoza, it's a kitten, not a cat."
A/N: I'm back with more fluff! Ginoza deserves some love (especially after episode 21) and so I wrote a fun little story if everyone pitched in to get him a kitten.
Ginoza leaned back in his office chair, removing his glasses. The gentle flicker of the fluorescent light was soothing and, more importantly, he was finally alone. No Kagari breaking out into song randomly, no Kougami smoking (there was a no smoking sign, damnit), and no worrying over Akane. He fished out a book from the bookcase, removing the bookmark and continuing from where he left off. He took a sip of his coffee, sighing contently. Nothing could ruin this moment, nothing—
"Yo, Ginoza-san, we got you a present!" The voice of no other than Shusei Kagari drifted into the office, causing the man to reflexively squeeze the Styrofoam cup, spilling the contents onto himself. The liquid was scalding, and if he was alone (which he wasn't) he would have screamed. But, he was an Inspector and this minor burn (hell, half his arm was pink) would not cause him to act in such an unprofessional manner—
"Kagari! Get a first-aid kit, now!" He cursed at the idiot, all thoughts of acting professional and civilized out the window.
"No problem, boss. Let's see, I wasn't really taught first-aid but I'm sure I'll manage." Ginoza swore he saw a glint of mischief in the man's topaz eyes.
…
"Kagari? Did you happen to give Ginoza his—" The girl stopped, taking in the scene.
"Wait, Tsunemori, this isn't what it looks like!"
"I-I'll come back later…" She walked out, closing the office door behind her.
The pair were shirtless (because Kagari 'remembered' something about making sure all areas of the burn were not covered in clothing), in a compromising position (curse Kagari again, for saying he needed to invade the Inspector's personal space to make sure the burns were taken care of), which no doubt looked like the two were about to lean in for a kiss.
"You idiot! Why did you take off your shirt?"
"I thought in case you started bleeding I'd have something to stop the blood."
"There are gauze pads in the kit."
"Oh…"
"And I was burned, not stabbed."
…
Once that fiasco was dealt with (getting Kagari to mop up the spilled coffee, apologize to Akane, and take an actual class in first-aid) Gino was left with a pair of cracked glasses and bandages up his right arm. He hadn't even thought of the 'present' the Enforcer had mentioned until it crawled into his lap. While he was doing paperwork. Meowing incessantly.
"Why is there a cat on my desk?" He half questioned (almost not wanting to know the answer) half sighed.
"Ah, Ginoza-san, we noticed how stressed you were getting and we wanted to do something. Kougami mentioned something about you liking cats and well, the idea kinda took off." The girl smiled sheepishly, unable to look at the Inspector.
"I see. Tell Kougami the next time I see him—"
"Akane-chan, you gave Gino Milkshake? I told you to wait for me!" The amber eyed Enforcer strolled into the office, hands in his pocket. The raven haired man nearly flinched at his voice (not that he was scarred, or anything) and immediately felt the urge to crawl back to his bed and sleep for say… three-hundred years.
"His name is not Milkshake." The Inspector pulled the cat out of his lap, and onto his desk. It meowed irritably, stroking itself against the computer monitor.
Checking his watch he kept a stoic face, reaching for his glasses (which were still broken) and instead came up with air. Sighing, he sat back in his chair, watching the idiots play with the… atrocity.
"You do realize that this cat is only raising my crime-coefficient?"
"Ginoza, it's a kitten, not a cat." A certain dark-haired Enforcer walked into the office, a smug look on his face.
"I don't care if it's a crocodile, we can't have it in the office. Take it to someone who can care for it." The man tried his best to deposit the crying animal into Akane's arms, but it retaliated, digging its claws into his suit.
"Awww, Milkshake doesn't want to leave you, Gino! How cute!" Shusei laughed, pointing at the obviously flustered man.
"Kagari, you're lucky I don't shoot you with my Dominator now. Get this thing off me!"
"Uh, Gino, you might want to wait till it falls asleep. Once it does, I'll carry it back to my room."
The Inspector sighed, allowing the cat to cuddle into his lap.
"Fine… and give the cat a better name. I sure as hell wouldn't want to be called 'Milkshake.'"
…
Unfortunately for Ginoza, the name stuck. All of Unit 1 had fallen in love with the tabby cat.
Masaoka snuck treats for the kitten whenever he could. Kougami would hold it sometimes when he was doing paperwork. Akane had tried dressing it up in clothes (and received three scratches in return). And, the worst, Kagari, had actually brought the animal with him on a case (who brings cats with them when they chase after criminals? Lucky enough, the cat managed to stay in his coat pocket, unharmed; only alerting its presence to the team when it got hungry. Needless to say, Kagari was not allowed within ten feet of the animal for a week).
And Ginoza? Not that he'd actually show it, but he didn't mind the present of the kitten too much. He would pet the animal whenever he was alone, give it milk whenever it whined at him, and let it sleep in his lap after a long day at the office.
What he hadn't expected was for his psycho-pass to decrease by ten points. Or, how it brought the whole team a little closer.
The Inspector stood surprised (and a little jealous—I mean why wasn't he invited?) at the little scene in the control room. A huge monitor was displaying the end credits to some horror movie, the group fast asleep on the couch. Akane was sandwiched in between Kougami and Shusei, both resting their heads against her shoulders. Shion and Yayoi were curled up next to each other, the black-haired woman's head resting on Shion's lap and her legs across Masaoka's chest. The old Enforcer was snoring contently in the middle of the group, head tipped back with a content smile on his face. The kitten slept peacefully in Kougami's lap, tail swaying languidly against Akane's arm.
If he wasn't a business-oriented man, his heart might have warmed (or grown three sizes) at the sight of the team acting like a close-knit family. But, he was an Inspector, a handler to these dogs, and a role model for Akane and—in the end, he couldn't help but take a picture on his phone.
Unfortunately, he had forgotten all about the security cameras (that caught him in the act of taking the picture, and allowing the team to continue resting there).
…
"Ahahaha, I knew Gino-san was a big softie. Look, he even took a picture of us!" Shion laughed.
Needless to say, he pretended that picture was for blackmail. Not that he cared for the team—or anything. Or, that he liked the kitten. Definitely not because he thought the animal was cute or something…
Ginoza Nobuchika had always been a shoddy liar.