Rain
A/N: My first legit one-shot! (All of my others suck… :/ ) I hope that everyone likes it! Everyone who reviews gets replies! (And digital cookies!) I made this because Al doesn't get enough near-familial interaction with everybody. Poor Al... D: Please read the note at the bottom. It is very important!
Disclaimer: Sorry, but FMA belongs to the most amazing Hiromu Arakawa, that great cow we all know and love :D
Rain.
It had become a personal attraction to the Elric brothers. It was where no one could see one of them cry. Where the other could just feel those sad feelings and pretend that every raindrop hitting his helmet was a tear. Yet, if it was such a good thing for them, why did it bring just as much sorrow for them?
West City. The center of the West Area of Amestris, home to the West Area's military capitol. A place that neither brothers had a single tie to.
It was late at night, and a storm was raging outside, shaking the hotel to the core. Much to the misfortune of most, yet a great joy to the only one awake, Alphonse. Night was a good thinking time, and the rain let him feel for once.
No, it wasn't the physical feel that he really missed. But, it was a feel nonetheless, and if it were something that linked him back to his body in any way, then he'd take it.
The lobby was as empty as it possibly could be at midnight. Al picked his way down there, not wanting to spend some more alone time listening to his brother's snores. He heaved himself against the wall, relaxing against it and pretending to feel everything.
He enjoyed- sometimes- pretending. And, he was pretty good at it. After all, he's had to pretend to the entire military that he was just a boy inside the armor for a training mission. Also, he had to pretend that it didn't bother him that while he was younger, he was missing everything rather than just an arm and a leg, everyone only cared about Edward. After all, who gave a damn about something that wasn't even human?
'You are, stupid. Brother says so.'
Al leaned over his knees to stare at what he figured was a soft carpet. It didn't matter that Ed said that he was human- knew he was human. Everyone else thought that he was just a freak. Everyone else thought that he was… well…
He glanced up, surprised, when the clicking of heels signaled someone's approach. A young blond woman stood next to him, leaned against the wall, and slid down it. "Alphonse." She greeted swiftly.
"Hello, Lieutenant." Was Alphonse's stiff, uncertain reply. "Shouldn't you be asleep?"
"Probably. But the storm woke me and I figured that you could use some company."
"…Thanks, then…"
Hawkeye sighed, gathering her knees up to her chest comfortably. "You look like you're thinking, Alphonse. What about, if you don't mind my prying."
Alphonse glanced down at her. She could tell? "Um… not much. No, that's a lie. Everything."
"Specifics?"
"Uh… noth- no… I don't know. It's all kind of a jumbled mess in my… wherever I keep my thoughts…" Al said softly.
Hawkeye frowned. "You thinking about Edward?"
Alphonse paused. He turned to her. "Um… yeah, you could say that…"
"Are you jealous of Edward?"
"J-jealous?" Alphonse cried, astounded. "Why would I be jealous of brother? I mean, every…thing… it's all…" If he could, Al would have been blushing heavily at his pathetic lie. The First Lieutenant was staring into his soulfire eyes.
"What about?"
Al took a few seconds to watch her, to see if this was all a whim and not that she was certain he would feel this way. Finally, "…A lot of things."
"Care to explain?"
Al pulled his knees tighter to his body, curling his arms around them. "It's just that… I don't know… it's like, no one remembers that I am human anymore. I mean, they all look at Ed and they see someone who looks like a human. Sure, a few limbs are missing, he's got some auto-mail, but there's a human look about him. But then, they look up at me…" Al didn't even have to finish his sentence for Riza to understand. "I sound like I'm being selfish, or too expectant, or… I don't know. I wish that someone would look at me and realize that this isn't possible, for a suit or armor to just wander around like this, and realize that something happened for someone to be like this, and I don't know… care." Al thought that his voice broke once or twice, but was that even possible?
Riza closed her eyes and sighed. She had figured that that was the problem.
"I think that, maybe it's just easier to talk to Ed because he's human. It's easier to care about him than it is to care about me, 'cause right now I'm just a giant freak. I mean, I'm grateful that brother saved me and all, but… I don't know… It's not fair." Al decided.
Riza smiled and glanced back up at him. "I think you're right, Alphonse. It's a lot easier to talk to Edward than to you. But that's no reason for us to ignore you. You're right." Hawkeye nodded.
Al glanced down at her. "Huh?"
"You're right." Hawkeye repeated. She shifted a little closer to him. "You are still a child, no matter the body you're in. And you, just like Edward, need to talk." She continued.
If Al could have picked any moment to have a body, it would be this one. If only so he could just cry for once.
Hawkeye patted his metal shoulder softly. "Have you told Edward of these… musings of yours?" she asked.
"…No. He has too much on his shoulders, he doesn't need this."
"But I think that he'd want this."
"What?" Alphonse glanced down at her. His red, glowing eyes were wide with confusion and curiosity. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that he'd rather that you told him, than just kept this to yourself. You always tell him to let someone help carry his burden, don't you? Try taking your own advice." Hawkeye scolded softly.
Al turned away. "…I can't. No one would listen."
"I'm listening."
That single statement spoke volumes to the younger Elric. He stared down at the young blond woman, shock in his eyes.
She raised her eyebrows expectantly, waiting for him to spill.
…And he couldn't help it. It all just came in a rush. He told her everything; about being so unsure about the original transmutation, about how much he missed everything, about not being able to do anything that he'd been able to do with a human body, about fearing for Edward's life so much any time that they were separated. He told her stuff that she already knew, and stuff that he'd never told anybody, not even Ed. Part of the time he was spouting off random crap about one thing or the other that had nothing to do with what they were talking about, and yet Hawkeye still listened. She always did.
Five minutes later, Al slowed to a stop, his mind and soul out of things to say and ideas to stash away for later. And still, Hawkeye was silent, waiting for him to think of something new to say and to feel. Another three minutes after he didn't say anything, he noticed that she was yawning.
"Maybe you should go back to bed. We have a mission tomorrow and you do get tired." Alphonse scolded her softly. He clenched his fists as Riza stood.
"I probably should. Good night Alphonse. And why don't you tell your brother? I'm sure that he'll find a way to alleviate your fears." Hawkeye dusted off her soft pajama pants, smiling down at the hulking suit of armor.
Al shrugged. "Maybe. Probably not. I don't want to upset him."
"I still doubt that you did." Riza stretched and softly patted Alphonse's metal helmet, smiling at him. "Good night again, Alphonse."
"…Good night Lieutenant. And thanks."
Normally Al only liked it for its chilly drops that he could at least pretend were the upsetting tears that he so desperately wished could fall every night that he spent, awake and alone, in the hollow armor. But that night- if only that night- they wouldn't be tears of despair, pain, suffering, guilt, and longing. No. For once, they would be pretend-tears of happiness.
Rain.
There! My first good one-shot! I hope everyone liked it... :D
So, I don't know what to do now. Should I leave it as it is, just like this? Or should I make a sequel to this where Riza makes Al tell Ed what he's been feeling? ...I don't know. I will if reviewers liked that idea enough...
ANYWAY. From tomorrow until Saturday, I probably won't be updating. In fact... yeah, I won't update. I might read, but update I will not. I'll be going on a camping trip with my mom, sister, and our friends. Just a little girls' thing. But then, from Monday until the Saturday or Sunday after that I won't be updating; I'll be going on a youth group trip to Illinois. :3 So yeah, see you guys then.
So anyway, please review! XD Thanks for reading!
~YAJJ