"The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing... not healing, not curing... that is a friend who cares."
Henri Nouwen

Morgan was asleep when Hotch reached their shared hotel room. He tried to be quiet as he skinned himself out of his suit. He felt exhaustion build within him. The bathroom gave him the privacy to just be alone for a few minutes. He looked longingly at the shower, but was just too tired to even consider it. In exchange, he washed his face and doused his head with water. It didn't wake him, but he felt a little less grimy.

As he walked out of the bathroom, he looked at Morgan who seemed to sleep so peacefully, he felt himself smile. He always seemed to sleep as if he was waiting for the phone to ring. He felt tired a lot lately. He sat on the unused bed. Without thought, he leaned back and closed his eyes. Sleep captured him instantly.

Derek woke with the change in light in the room, he looked over to see that Hotch had actually gotten in sometime during the night, and had apparently fallen asleep half dressed and on top of the bedspread. He moved out of his bed and gently shook the other man's shoulder, Hotch barely stirred.

"Come on man, under the covers, you've got another hour or so."

Hotch made inarticulate noises, but moved at Derek's direction. He was soon under the covers and blinked madly, he tried to wake up was Derek's take. "Just sleep Hotch, come on, it's really early."

"Not tired."

"Right, you're just fired up to get going. Sleep. It's okay I've got this."

Hotch sighed hard. "Stay."

Morgan frowned. "Sure, no problem. I'm right here, right beside you. Everything's taken care of, you just sleep." He put his hand on Hotch's shoulder and Hotch covered it with his own.

Derek sat on the side of the bed. Hotch leaned back against him.

"O – kay," Morgan smiled. "Bodyguard for a little while. No problem."

Morgan moved 'til he was laying behind Hotch and within moments they were both asleep.

Derek awoke an hour later, more than a little surprised that he was holding Hotch. But he relaxed into it when he remembered the early morning conversation. His arm was now around the smaller man and Hotch was holding that arm to him.

He felt he really should gently extricate himself before Hotch woke. So he gently got out of the bed. He leaned down and smoothed Hotch's hair. He shook his head as he went into the bathroom. It was going to be a long day. If he was lucky, Hotch wouldn't remember any of the night or early morning.

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4 days earlier

The unsubs had been killing young girls in a small area of New Mexico. Within a few weeks the local police had called in the profilers. Bodies were still being found.

Hotch stood at the board at the BAU conference room. "Albequerque seems to have a serial killer. The unsub is taking young girls on their way home from school."

He put up a picture of a pre-teen girl, "This is Miranda Hawkins, twelve. Her teachers say that she's a good student, her parents say she wouldn't go off with a stranger, her walk home from school was less than a block. This is Miranda now, she was found in a desert area nearly forty miles from her school. She'd been beaten and molested sexually. She was shot with a 45."

He put up another picture, another young girl, "Harriet Thompson, eleven. A decent student, lived close to her school. Disappeared 2 weeks ago, found 3 days ago within the same area of desert."

The team looked through their files. Five missing girls, all found dead.

"Why didn't they call us sooner?" Reid frowned.

Garcia piped up, "At first the police thought the girls were runaways."

Morgan shook his head, they'd heard this before. The girls were runaways until the bodies started to show up.

"Let's review on the plane, wheels up in an hour." Hotch bit out. Reid looked up as if to ask a question, but was silent.

As they were leaving the conference room, Morgan stayed behind and approached his boss. "You okay Hotch? Jack?"

"I'm fine Morgan, it's, it's Haley's birthday."

Morgan nodded, "Second one since?"

Hotch gave a short nod. "It should be getting easier."

"Hey man, it takes as long as it takes."

Hotch rubbed at his eyes. "Yeah, thanks, I know."

Derek rubbed Hotch's shoulder through his jacket. "Better to feel it, you know."

His hand covered his face as Hotch shrugged acceptance.

"Come on man, time to get your go bag in order. I'm not lending you my best t-shirt this time."

"To be fair, I did save your ass from that unsub."

Derek laughed out loud. "Yes you did, and my t-shirt was a fair price. Especially after you made that huge hole in yours."

"That was a knife Morgan."

"Knife, tear, whatever."

"Knife aimed at you."

"Yeah yeah you're my hero, I'll lend you my t-shirts anytime."

Hotch tapped Morgan's shoulder. "Thanks."

Morgan nodded slightly, "Anytime."

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Hotch stared out the window as the jet made its way cross-country. Rossi settled across from Hotch and started to read through the documents on his iPad. He sighed and looked up at his boss. "You know Hotch, you could have stayed behind."

Hotch nodded and continued to look at the clouds outside the window. "It feels like it was yesterday, and sometimes it feels like it was years ago."

Rossi reached across and touched Hotch lightly on the arm. "Time's the only thing that helps. You know that."

Hotch shrugged. "And work, this works."

Rossi grinned, "Well then let's get to it."

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Reid looked up to see Hotch struggle for a moment. There were times when Reid knew he missed clues about his co-workers. But at this moment he saw Hotch was fighting his emotions. He felt ungainly and slightly wrong as he lightly placed his hand on Hotch's shoulder and looked into the man's tear filled eyes. "Hotch, why don't you sit down for a minute." He guided his boss into an empty conference room at the Albequerque police headquarters. He sat across from the man who'd been his mentor, his rock for all the years he'd worked at the BAU. The man who listened and understood him more than any of the others. He handed him a glass of water from a pitcher on a credenza in the room. "Hotch, can I get Rossi or…"

"No, I'm fine, thank you Spencer. I just need a minute."

"Drink the water."

Automatically Hotch drank, he gave a short sigh. "Thank you, I'm really sorry about this. It's, it's Haley's birthday, and I just can't stop thinking about, what happened."

Reid nodded, he moved to the same side of the table as Hotch. "It's okay, you know, we're all here for you." Again his hand uncertainly squeezed the suit clad shoulder. "We're here for each other, it's what we do."

At that moment Morgan opened the door to the room. "You two okay? They want to hear the profile, preliminary or not." Morgan tilted his head as if in question at Reid. Reid nodded back in affirmative that the boss probably could handle it.

Quietly Reid said, "We can take this Hotch, why don't you just stay here?"

"I'm fine."

Once he looked up Morgan moved forward. "Listen, Hotch, hang in here for a little while. There's a men's room two doors down. Go clean up a little and come into the morning room when you're ready. Reid, why don't you stay for a little while?"

"Sure." Reid's hand now stayed comfortably on Hotch's shoulder. "We'll be a minute."

JJ and Prentiss looked into the room, but Reid gave a sharp head shake no and they moved on to the morning room.

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Morgan, Rossi and Prentiss stood at the front of the morning room, where officers got their assignments early in their shift. A large map of the Albequerque area was pinned to a board and a large flat screen was displaying the FBI wallpaper. Garcia was on the line and would feed the images as needed.

"Our unsub is a pedophile, a man in his mid 20's to mid 40's, he looks to all intents and purposes normal. He doesn't look out of place in the neighborhoods around the schools the girls have been abducted from. From the medical examiners reports the girls were taken without force, that means he was able to get them to go with him. He may have a ruse, or he just may be very fast and efficient in abduction. He is drugging the girls, likely during the entire time he has them." Morgan started.

"Because he seems to easily take the girls, girls who would not normally accept a ride from a stranger, we're thinking this man is known to them. He may be someone who works at the school, a janitor, a substitute teacher, a delivery man. Someone who they see often enough to trust. There is some possibility, though it'd be unusual, that this is someone capable of just overpowering the children and it could be a stranger." Prentiss stopped and looked around.

JJ continued, "If he's a stranger he may be using a gun or knife to compel the girls to come with him. The girls are taken at the end of the school day, so we're thinking the unsub is either unemployed or has a job that allows him freedom at that time of day."

Reid and Hotch entered the room. Rossi looked up and introduced the two agents. Hotch added, "This is a preliminary profile, we're going to go through all the reports and evidence files and when we have something more we'll gather together again."

The police contingent left the room, except for the Sheriff and he sat with the team. Hotch looked at them all, "Tell me we have more information."

Garcia's voice sounded from the speaker, "We may have something on the drugs the girls were given. It's a prescription sleep aid and a barbiturate. You might get it on the street, but I'm thinking maybe not."

"Good work Garcia, see what you can get for records."

"Will do, Garcia, over and out." The screen now showed them a running account of local pharmacies and the prescriptions for the two drugs.

"There've got to be hundreds…." Morgan started.

"More like thousands." Reid added.

Prentiss sighed, "So everyone in New Mexico has a sleeping problem?"

"Ah, but now we're getting a list of people actually being prescribed a barbiturate." Reid smiled. "Our specific drug combination yields exactly 28 people."

"Yeah, looks like that particular prescription is very limited. They're trying to get people onto other drugs that aren't quite so addicting." The sheriff said.

"But likely don't work as well. So this is prescribed mostly for end stage cancer." Morgan read. "So our pedophile is dying?"

"Or knows someone who is, or has and has kept the script." JJ said offhand and disgusted.

Hotch raised a brow at her, but nodded. "So let's split the list and go visit."

The Sheriff rose, "I can give you some cruisers."

Reid's face lit, "Great, and cops to go with them."

The Sheriff laughed, "Of course. We need to see at least 27 real sick people right."

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After the third nursing home and second hospice Morgan was having a difficult time to keep his perspective. But someone out there was getting hold of these drugs. "Hotch, what if it's a nurse or something, not one of these sick people."

"That's probably more likely, but we need to check this lead out. Just keep your eyes open. Someone will be acting out of character. Something will come up."

Reid and Prentiss called in with nothing to report, they'd visited the homes of five very sick people who seemed to have saints for care-givers. It was depressing and Hotch could hear it in their voices. "Go back to the hotel, we'll start fresh in the morning."

About then, news came to the sheriff that another little girl was missing. Hotch rode in with the sheriff to review the evidence. Though they both knew that very likely the girl was already dead or dying. "We have to get ahead of this guy." Hotch ground out.

He spent the evening buried in reports and tried to develop some fresh leads. At around four in the morning he found himself drift off to sleep. He jumped into one of the FBI cars and drove to the hotel.

He sat on the bed as he watched Morgan sleep. Now that he was in the room, sleep eluded him. Suddenly, the unbearable weight of knowledge that a little girl was dead came down on him. He rushed into the bathroom. He sat on the tile floor, breathed hard, sweat dripped. He got into the shower in his underwear and socks just to cool himself off. He rinsed out his clothes, which made him feel slightly better, slightly more ready to face another day. He pulled the boxers from his ready bag and crawled into bed.

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The next day went much the same as the first. Hotch worked until he was nearly asleep and barely made it to his shared room with Morgan. He woke up only hours after he fell into bed half dressed.

They spent the days in talks with the dying and their caretakers. It finally came down to a very old man who was being cared for by his son. Only the old man wasn't in the house and the son had no answer for where he was.

It was late in the day when Hotch stood at the door and talked to a man quietly. "Just help us figure out what's happening Gerry, I need to find your dad, his prescription is being used fraudulently."

"I need to go to work now, I had to get a job teaching."

"Oh, you're a teacher? What schools?"

"You can't stop me, you have no right."

"I'm just here to see your dad."

At this point the man slammed the door and Hotch pushed forward. He'd have to wait for a warrant.

In his ear the communication bud sounded with Morgan's voice, "Round back Hotch, there's a trench."

"Oh shit." Hotch swore. "Don't tell me..."

"I think so Hotch, it looks like it. Pretty deep."

Hotch looked at the sheriff who was on the phone to a judge. He ran to the back yard. The light was low and he carefully skirted the trench.

"I hate this." Hotch mumbled.

"Yeah I know," Morgan agreed. "Sucks, but we'll have the warrant, no way he can get out."

"What's he got in there?" Reid peered over the edge.

"Looks like rebar, maybe he intended to cement it in." Hotch shook his head. "It always amazes me."

Reid took another step to see clearer and Hotch moved quickly as Reid began to lose his balance as the edge of the trench crumbled beneath him. He grabbed the younger man and bodily moved him a foot away from the edge, then set a foot down that caused the ground to give under him. He crashed to the bottom of the open grave.

"Hotch." Reid yelled.

Morgan who'd been setting up the assault on the house, turned to Prentiss. "You lead, don't kill him if you can help it."

Prentiss shrugged, but began to set up signals with the SWAT team that had arrived while they waited for the warrant.

"Hotch!" Morgan said only slightly less shrill than Reid had been.

Hotch was very still at the bottom of the trench. With their flashlights they illuminated the bottom. Blood seemed to pool around his head. Morgan lowered himself carefully into the grave.

"Reid, have you called an EMT?"

"They're on their way."

"He's unconscious. Shit, Hotch, why do you have to be like this?"

Morgan didn't dare turn his boss for fear of what injuries could be there. But he knelt in the dirt by his head and whispered. "Help's coming, man. Just hang in there with me."

After what seemed to Reid and Morgan a long time, Hotch opened his eyes. "What?"

"You fell."

"Hurts."

Morgan smiled. "It should, you seem to be bleeding pretty good."

The EMT imperiously moved Morgan out of the way. "Agent. Can you tell me your name?"

Hotch looked at the man in disbelief. "Of course I could."

The EMT grinned, "Well?"

"Aaron Hotchner."

"Do you know the date?"

Hotch looked at the man and took a moment, "No, it's 2011 right, sometime in October, November?"

"Close enough. Listen Mr. Hotchner, you've got a really nasty cut on your head, is there anywhere else you hurt?"

"I think I scratched my arm and my leg and hip."

"Yeah your clothes are really torn up."

"Rebar."

The EMT nodded then said, "yeah."

"We're going to get you out of here, just give me a minute to get the board set. We've got a nice basket we're going to get you into."

"I can climb out."

The EMT almost laughed. "Mr. Hotchner I think you might have a few broken bones and really likely you have a concussion, so humor me."

Two other techs got into the trench and between them and Morgan got Hotch into the basket that lifted him back up to the yard level. From there it was to a helicopter and off to the hospital.

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He really had no patience for hospitals. If he'd been able to stand he'd have walked out already. Well that was the rub of course.

Rossi sat dozing next to the bed. Morgan slipped into the room, he half-expected Hotch to be asleep. "Why are you even awake?"

"Is everyone okay? Did Gerald come in peacefully?"

"Yes everyone is fine, Prentiss said she did my door kicking routine and scared the poor man shitless."

Hotch laughed. Morgan grinned at him. "You do know your laugh is contagious."

"Don't tell anyone, they'll never let me out of here."

"They want you here overnight, for the concussion. You do have the most magnificent black eye, did you know?"

"Crap Morgan I wanted to be home for Jack, Halloween."

"No problem, we'll go tomorrow, you won't go out with him, but I think I've talked Reid into going with him and his aunt."

"Thanks Morgan. I think I need to sleep now."

Morgan touched Hotch's hair above the bandage encircling his head. "I know."